by Amy Cecil
She fidgeted and looked down at her hands. “Mark Grayson.” She spoke so softly I could barely hear her. I gave her the look. Realizing I wanted more, she added defiantly, “He is my fiancé – and please stop swearing at me.”
Her fiancé? No, no, no, this can’t be. I immediately looked down at her left hand and saw the huge diamond ring she was wearing. She caught what I was doing and quickly covered her left hand with her right. I hadn’t noticed the ring until now. Why hadn’t I noticed it? I was so arrogant to think that she would wait for me all these years … I never believed she would be engaged. Well, she finally did it. She has left me speechless, but I know that I have to say something. Does she even know how she has wounded me right now? I know I should not have expected anything different from her, but I’d always hoped that we would find our way back to each other.
“Ok, Cade, get it together. You still hold all the cards here. It is you she came to for help, not Mark. Use that to your advantage.” I asked with as much sarcasm as I could muster, “Your fiancé? I didn’t know you had gotten engaged, when is the happy day?”
Looking down at the floor, she replied, “We have not set a date yet.”
Trying hard to hide the smile from my face, I added sarcastically, “Well you better be sure to send me an invite. I wouldn’t want to miss the party.” I added, “Why isn’t Mark helping you?”
Quietly, she responded, “He refuses to help.”
“What do you mean he refuses to help? That makes no sense.”
Shyly, she responded, “Well, when I told him about Brianne, he said that he was sure she was fine. When I pressed him on the issue as to why he was so sure, he basically told me that I needed to mind my own business. He said that Brianne was a grown woman and it was not my responsibility to take care of her or worry about her. He told me to let the police do their job.”
“And so you then came to me?” I asked, still trying to figure out exactly why she would go against her fiancé.
“Like I said before, you were my last hope. We weren’t getting anywhere with the police and after my conversation with Mark, I decided it was best that I dropped the subject and not discuss it further with him.”
Ok, now I am mad. This guy is supposed to love her. “This is the man you want to spend your life with, a spineless bastard that cannot even help his future wife? I just don’t get it, Emma. What happened to you over the last 11 years?”
She finally looked at me, really looked at me, and pleaded with tears in her eyes, “Cade, please, let’s not do this now. I don’t have any intention of discussing Mark with you anymore. I’ve come to you for help. Can that be enough for now?”
I watched her change almost immediately when I started asking about Mark. Something is up there, but obviously she does not want to talk about it. Or at least, she doesn’t want to talk about it with me. As I was about to give her an answer, she quietly asked, “So will you please help me?”
Of course I’m gonna help her. My Emma needs me, what else can I do? I resign myself to drop the subject of Mark, for now. I will get to the bottom of that one down the road. I answer her, “Yes, I’ll help you; however, only if you can accept my terms. You want me? Well, the club is a part of me. You can’t have one without the other. If you can respect my club and trust that we know what we are doing, then we will help find your friend.” Before she could interject, I continued, “That means that you will refrain from expressing your uppity attitude or opinions to me, any of my brothers, or any of their old ladies. You will be truthful in everything you tell us and you will do as you are told. Even if you don’t agree! Are we clear?”
She nodded in agreement, then asked, “May I ask one question?”
“Of course,” I replied.
“What is an old lady?”
I laughed. I couldn’t help it. That innocent little girl came through in her question and I could see that beautiful precocious ten-year-old I remembered. She was so fucking adorable. It was not going to be easy being around her all the time, especially now that she is engaged. The old saying is true: be careful what you wish for. I realize now that it was easier to love her from afar. I’m so fucked!
“Emma, you are definitely going to need some MC training. Especially since you will be staying at the clubhouse for a while.”
“What? What do you mean, staying at the clubhouse? I can’t stay here. Mark will never allow it.”
“Remember the part of our agreement where we talked about you doing what you are told?” She nodded, her eyes downcast. I continued, “Yes, you are staying here. Don’t ask me why, but my gut is telling me there is more than meets the eye with the disappearance of your friend. I just can’t put my finger on it right now. I would feel better if you were here, where I can keep my eye on you. If Mark Grayson loved you, he would agree and allow it as you say. Hopefully it won’t be for long and you can return to your charmed life.” I paused briefly, then added, “Oh, and don’t call me Caden. I haven’t used that name in years. It’s Ice now; you will do well to remember that. Now, I am going to get my VP and Sergeant and bring them in here. I want you to tell us everything about your friend.” As I started toward the door, I turned back and said, “Stay put, I’ll be right back.” I couldn’t help noticing the amused expression on her face. What’s up with that shit?
Chapter 2
Emma
“Ice?” Is he serious? I couldn’t help but laugh to myself. Ice what? Iceberg, Ice chest, Iceman? Oh, this is just too funny. Iceman would fit him. I know he has been to hell and back, but that doesn’t give him the right to act like an asshole.
He was right about one thing, though. I did tell him I hated him. Even when I said it, I didn’t really; I never could. Caden had always been there for me for as long as I can remember. By the time I turned sixteen, I was crushing on him big time, but he kept pushing me away. He no longer had the time to spend with me, nor the inclination to make the time. It broke my heart. He is still so hot, with that dark hair, ice-blue eyes, and that sexy smile. That’s it! That is where the nickname came from! I get it now. Seeing him after all these years, I forgot how much I had been missing him. The day I told him I hated him was the worst day of my life.
I had seen Caden around women, lots of women, especially after he joined the MC. But I had never actually seen him with a girl. We had not seen each other in a long time and I was missing him so much. He no longer lived next door and his absence was always in the forefront of my mind. He knew I was mad at him for joining the Knights, so we pretty much kept our distance. Right before I left for college, I decided that I was finally going down to the MC to talk to my friend – if he still wanted to be my friend, anyhow. When I got to the gate, I asked if I could speak with Caden. A couple of the guys at the gate talked in hushed tones to each other. I couldn’t make out most of what they were saying, but I did hear one say, “But she is just a kid.” Despite his objections, they decided to let me in. They told me Cade was in the clubhouse. I went inside and was immediately appalled. The clubhouse was filthy and smelled of beer and cigarette smoke. It was disgusting.
Still, I was determined to find him. I asked one of the girls at the bar where I could find him and she directed me to his room: upstairs, last door on the left. A little nervous, I walked up the stairs and headed for his room. The door was ajar, so I stepped in. There he was, sitting in a leather chair in his room while some whore sucked him off. He was combing his fingers through her hair and moaning. I gasped and couldn’t move. He must have heard me because he looked directly at me and smiled. There I was, staring at my dearest friend in the whole world, and he was staring at me while that bitch was finishing him off. I was so hurt. Tears started to stream down my cheeks. I could not look at him anymore and took off. I ran as fast as I could, but when I got to the gate I had to wait for the guys to unlock it and let me out. As I waited, I heard him calling after me.
I refused to turn around. I couldn’t face him. The guys started to open the gate, but whe
n they heard Caden yelling they stopped. I felt a strong arm grip my shoulder to stop me. I couldn’t take it. I tried to think of a time when it was just us, when he loved me, but the vision of him and that whore would not escape me. When I finally looked up at him, his gaze was fixed on me and I could see embarrassment on his face.
“Emma, what the fuck are you doing here?” he yelled.
He was angry with me!? He acted as if I was the one who had done something wrong. Oh no, I was not going to allow that to happen. I yelled back, “What do you think I am doing here, asshole? I came to see you. It has been months since you have been around and I was missing my friend. Obviously you weren’t missing me, so fuck off Caden. I’m done!”
I turned to leave again, and again he grabbed my arm. “Whoa there, sweetheart. Don’t you yell at me. You were the one that barged into my room. You should have called first.”
“I have called. You never answer your phone. I even sent you a text to let you know I was on my way.”
He looked guilty. “What’s the matter, Caden, did I hit a nerve? Don’t you have anything to say to me?”
He was still silent.
I was so angry and so hurt! “Who’s the whore, Caden? Is she your new flavor of the day? I’d say flavor of the month, but these days you have a new skank every day. It’s disgusting.”
I knew my words pissed him off, but I was too mad at him to care. I could see the anger radiating from his eyes as he pulled me into him. I’ll never forget the feel of him against me. It was more than I could bear, and I remember that my entire body tingled. I was sure he was going to kiss me, and to my surprise I wanted him to.
Our lips were so close, nearly touching as he said, “Get this straight, Princess: when I fuck, where I fuck, and who I fuck is none of your business.” He gestured toward the erection bulging through his jeans and continued, “You want a piece of this, you just say the word, sweetheart, and I will be happy to oblige.”
We stood there for what seemed like several minutes, but when I think back, it was probably only seconds before I remembered the bitch I had just seen him with and I suddenly felt cornered. When I started to squirm in his arms, he released me. My anger rose beyond its boiling point and I yelled, “It will be a cold day in hell before I would ever want a piece of that! I hate you, Caden Jackson!” I turned toward the gate and left. My heart was shattered, and I swear I cried for three weeks straight.
That was the last time I spoke to Caden. He deserved my anger because he was so cruel to me, but we should have talked since then. As I look back on that day, I have come to realize that I was jealous. Seeing him with that skank made my heart literally ache. He was mine! He was my Caden, my prince … and the Knights MC took him from me. He had changed. He was no longer the sweet, attentive boy I had grown up with, and I blame the MC for that. He had become someone I no longer recognized. That’s why I hated the MC and everything they stood for, not because they were outlaws. I had to laugh at myself. What a predicament I have gotten myself into now. I just didn’t think; my first instinct was to go to him. When I was younger and I was in trouble or needed something, I always turned to Caden. Mark won’t help me, and he is going to be furious that I have asked Cade for help. But, if I want to find Brianne, I am at the mercy of the Knights of Silence MC and Mark Grayson is just going to have to live with that.
Just then, Caden – I mean, Ice – walked back into the room, followed by two big burly guys who I assumed were his VP and Sergeant. Caden gestured for the men to sit and then introduced them as his VP Hawk and his Sergeant Rebel. I don’t think I’ll ever understand the MC name thing. Both men nodded a hello to me – or at least, that’s what I thought it was. Caden then asked me to tell them my story about Brianne, which I did. I told them about Brianne and Skid, leaving out my opinions of course, as I had promised.
When I finished, Rebel spoke first, “Prez, what the fuck? Why are the Satans taking women now?” I realized that he was addressing Caden – I mean, Ice. He is their president. All this time talking with him, I never noticed the President patch on his vest, which now I see plain as day. Rebel continued, “Really Ice, do we really want to get involved with this?”
“Reb, I have no idea why the Satans are doing this, but I think there is more here than we know.”
“I hear ya, I do, but at the same time, I can’t help but think about the last time we tangled with the Satans. We lost lives. I’m not sure the boys are ready for that again.”
Hawk jumped in, “I agree with Reb, Ice. I’m not convinced that we should get involved.” I was beginning to worry. Were these guys going to talk Caden out of helping me? I sat there nervously listening to their conversation and anxiously awaited Caden’s decision.
Caden quietly listened to their arguments and seemed to take into consideration what they were saying. Once they voiced their concerns, Caden spoke. “Look guys, I totally get where you are coming from. Do you really think that I want to endanger our boys? Of course not, you both know me better than that. But I also think it is important for us to make sure we keep tabs on the Satans. The last thing we want is to be blindsided by something they have done. They have been quiet for far too long, and it worries me.”
“Do you think they know the connection between Emma and Brianne, and Emma’s connection to you?” Hawk asked.
“I didn’t even consider that this might be personal,” Rebel added. That thought never crossed my mind. Could this be personal? I waited for Cade’s response. I was curious what he thought about this.
“Good question, but I’m pretty sure they don’t know the connection between Emma and me. We were childhood friends, but we’ve been out of touch for many years now. So I don’t believe this is personal, but on the other hand, I believe that it is something that we should at least look into. Don’t ask me why, it’s just a gut feeling that I have that tells me not to let this one go.” He looked over to me and seemed lost in thought until Rebel spoke again.
“Your ‘gut feelings’ are usually right on, Prez. If this is something that you feel strongly about, I’m with ya.”
“Thanks, Reb.” Caden looked over to Hawk and asked, “And you? I need you both. If I don’t have you both behind me on this, there is a good chance that I’ll not get the rest of the club to agree to at least look into this.”
Hawk smiled and said, “Hell yeah, I’m with ya. You’re my Prez, and if you believe that this is something we need to do, then I’ll stand behind you. So, what’s the plan?”
“I don’t have anything definite yet, but I have been thinking about this for some time, but it never seemed like the right time. This situation with Emma gives me the reason I have been waiting for. I think that we should send someone in undercover and see if we can get any info. Someone outside the club, it can’t be a member. Ideas and suggestions would be helpful here. I’m not going to the table without a plan in mind.”
Rebel nodded his head in agreement.
Hawk said, “I think it’s the best move to make right now, since we don’t have a lot of information.”
It sounded really dangerous to me, but I trust Cade. And I really had no idea what he meant by “taking it to the table”, but I was sure I was about to find out. Caden nodded, and it seemed that all three were in agreement.
Caden stood and said, “Reb, get Tiny and Honey in here. I need their help getting Emma situated. She will be staying at the compound until this mess gets straightened out. Hawk, let the boys know: church in 15.” He then turned to me and said, “You stay put; I’ll be right back.” He saw my defiance and he gave me that look that said, “You better not say one word and do as you’re told.” I immediately refrained from speaking and just sat there. He commanded these men with such confidence and authority. He was beginning to scare me and turn me on at the same time.
My feelings for Caden run deep. As a little girl, he was my knight in shining armor, my prince, and I was sure I was going to marry him when I got older. But as I
got older, I realized how girlish those thoughts about Caden were. As I became a woman and grew old enough to know the difference between girlish ideals and physical attraction, my feelings for Cade changed drastically. Plain and simple, I wanted him. When I saw him with other women, it broke my heart. The more I wanted him, the more he pushed me away. Now, seeing him with such control and strength (not to mention that the years had been more than kind to him), I not only wanted him, I needed him.
A few minutes later, Caden walked back into the office with a younger guy and a girl in her late twenties. Before I could say anything to any of them, he said, “Emma, this is Tiny and Honey. Tiny will go back to your place with you to get your things. Just the necessities, please; we don’t have room for your whole fucking bathroom.” He paused, expecting me to complain, but I didn’t. He was testing me. I showed him that I could be compliant by not protesting. He then continued, “Once you get back, Honey will get you set up in one of the rooms upstairs.” He then looked at Honey and said, “The room next to mine will do.” Honey nodded, although she looked disappointed. I’m sure she was one of his regulars. She looked like a streetwalker, dressed in her skimpy halter-top and short shorts, with her ass cheeks showing. So disgusting. She was, however, very pretty. She had long blonde hair – natural, I would guess – and a tall, slender figure. I was instantly jealous of her.
He then added, “Boys, spread the word: Emma is off-limits!” I could only guess what he meant by off-limits, but I had to chuckle to myself; he is still my protector, no matter what has gone down between the two of us. His men nodded in agreement. When he was done, he said, “Tiny, get moving.”
Tiny approached me and said, “Miss Emma. If you are ready to go, ma’am?” He was so polite. Tiny was short, about 5’6”, but built like a brick house with sandy blond tousled hair. He was very attractive, in a boy-next-door kind of way. I giggled to myself as I realized how he’d got his name; he was anything but tiny!