Kruse’s head bows. “You’ve spoken to Zev.”
“You mean I was on the receiving end of his tirade.”
“Let me in so I can explain.”
“Trust me, you don’t want to be on this side of the doorway.”
He has the nerve to roll his eyes. We both know I can’t kick his ass, and that only pisses me off further.
“Jersey, after all the years we’ve been tight, you should hear me out.”
I hate that I hold a single fond feeling for this asshole, but I do. I swipe my long bangs from my face and step aside.
A shaky hand rakes over his hair as he passes by me. He strolls to my great room and slouches against the back cushion of my sofa.
“I don’t know what you could possibly have to say. Zev summed it up for me. You fucked my sister, cheapened her … hurt her.”
His forehead scrunches and eyes snap shut. From how well I know Kruse, it’s obvious my words stung.
“Simon, it’s nothing like that.”
“Zev went to see her today after he got wind that she didn’t show for work. She’s heartbroken, already jabbering about moving back to Jersey.
“You toyed with her feelings and let her fall in love with your sorry ass. How could you, Kruse? How could you fucking hurt my sister like that?”
Grabbing a candy dish from the coffee table, something Sadie has added as décor to my once bachelor pad, I launch it across the room. Mints and shattered glass go flying, but the aggression does nothing to curb my anger.
I look back to Kruse, who’s fisting his hair.
“Man, I’m sorry. I’d never intentionally hurt her. She means everything to me.”
“From what Zev told me, you expressed that in a marvelous fucking way.” I pace several feet away from him, the urge to beat his pretty-boy face mounting with every breath.
“This hotel was to be her safe place. We told you and every other human we knew with a dick to stay the hell away from her because this was the city where she hadn’t felt heartache. That’s all she knew in Jersey for years. Her father dying, her mother sick most of her life, and a worthless boyfriend.
“Vegas was her fresh start, a new home not plagued with fucking pain and worry, and in only a couple of months, you tainted her new space. You broke her, asshole, and for that, you’re dead to me.
“Since Adrian would put your ass on the road today if he knew, Zev and I are not going to tell him what you’ve done, but I advise you to look for another job. As soon as we find your replacement, you’re gone. Now, get the fuck out. I can’t trust you.”
Kruse
“Tommy’s gonna work your shift tonight, so since you’re not needed, you can go home,” Simon spouts after I enter his office off of the Elite lounge.
“It’s been a week, Simon, since you’ve looked me in the eyes. You can’t keep giving me the cold shoulder.”
“Yeah, I can, until I don’t have to look at you at all.”
“Please, hear me out. I–I miss Aggie. Zev said she’s in New Jersey, but he won’t tell me where, and I have to find her to apologize.”
Blowing out an exaggerated breath, he tosses the pen he’s been gnawing on onto his desk.
“Fine, sit.” He leans back in his office chair and laces his hands behind his head. “You better plead a good case. If not, then you’re not learning shit of her whereabouts.”
I sit in the chair across from him and huff out the air weighted down by my heavy, aching chest.
“Shit, this is hard to do.” I swear I feel the blood thumping against my carotid artery. “It’s not easy to share my feelings, but it’s worth it if it earns me the chance to apologize to her. Simon, I miss her like crazy.”
“Why should I believe you after what you did to her in front of Zev?”
“I had a reason. I thought I was doing her a favor in the long run, but now I see that should’ve been her decision to make.”
“Stop speaking in code.”
“I can’t have kids.”
“What?”
“Do you remember when we met, I told you I had recently recovered from leukemia?”
Simon’s head leans back a little and he frowns.
“I had completely forgotten about that, but yeah, I remember.”
“The doctors said the treatments made me sterile.”
“Damn.” Sitting up, he rests his forearms on the desk. “But what does that have to do with Aggie?”
“How can you not see it? I can’t give her a family, Jersey.”
“There are other means to having a family, and how do you even know Aggie wants kids? Did she tell you this?”
“No, I just assumed. She comes from a large family, and she’s thirty-six, so I figured if she wants them, she’ll expect it to happen soon.”
“You rejected my sister because you can’t give her your kid?”
“Yeah, but you’re acting like that’s not a valid reason. It’s a big deal if she wants to be with me but also longs to have children.”
“It’s only a big deal if she thinks so, but you didn’t give her the chance to decide that. You decided for her.”
I scratch my hair. “I was trying to do what was best for her, and for the record, I was never using your sister for sex. I didn’t even know her identity when I met her, and once I did, it was too late. There was already something between us, and things progressed rapidly, but we were only supposed to date … not fall in love.”
The second Simon makes eye contact with me, I glance away.
“You said we. Do you really love her?”
I swallow and pick at my dress pants.
“She should hear it first.”
“Damn straight. Do you swear you’ll apologize to her and let her decide if she wants to be with your sterile ass?”
I flash him a scowl. “Really?”
“I’m sorry, man. That was low. Are you absolutely sure you can’t have kids?”
“I didn’t go shoot my load into a cup at seventeen to find out, but the doctors were pretty certain.”
“Do you swear to treat her like royalty? Because after what she’s been through in life, she deserves nothing less.”
I smile, thinking back to the night I first met Aggie … my princess. “Absolutely.”
Simon grins, and so much weight lifts from my shoulders. “Let me tell you where she’s staying, and please bring her ass back to Vegas. We miss her already.”
Chapter Thirty
Aggie
The fall leaves are losing their ripeness of color and have mostly settled on the ground that surrounds my childhood home. A little girl, maybe five or six years old, is sitting on the front porch, playing with tiny figurines of some sort.
I come to a stop in front of the house, which we sold in only days, but once the cute girl takes notice of me, I pull away, not wanting her to be frightened.
I knew I should’ve held onto this house, but my brothers insisted I make a clean break, a fresh start, a new life.…
What they failed to mention was how a domineering, breathtaking man, one full of excitement and mystery, worked for them and would break my heart with a single word.
Needing to get the groceries I’ve just purchased into the refrigerator, I drive back to Aunt Norma’s home. She’s my father’s sister, and as soon as I informed her I was in town, she insisted I stay with her instead of a hotel.
I’m torn, the magnetic force pulling at me to return to Vegas, but my brain reminds me I had been imagining that force to be stronger than it truly was. Kruse made that clear. My aching heart signals I should stay here where it’s safe and dull.
Approaching my aunt’s home, I spot a car in the driveway. I park and remove the two bags of groceries from the backseat. As I march past the newer Toyota, I suspect it’s a rental and wonder if one of my brothers are here to convince me to return to Vegas.
Stressing over the impending conversation, my steps become heavier, and my heart beats faster. My shoulders sag, the bags drooping from my fisted han
ds.
The thought alone of having to express and expose my feelings has a cry catching in my throat and tears stinging my eyes.
My fresh laceration will spread back open, and by way of my candid words, the hurt will spill from me, like blood from a wound.
As I start to open the door, I hear his voice. Without thought, I violently slam the door back shut, my hand clutching the knob with all my strength. The bag holding a half gallon of milk sags and tightens around my wrist.
“Shit, what is Kruse doing here?” I utter. Feeling as if the wind has been knocked out of me, I hold my head back and will my lungs to hug even one more breath.
I need the answer to why he’s here. I have to go inside.
Walk in, Agatha. Find the strength and go inside.
Upon taking an extended breath, one inhaled between fear and courage, I gradually turn the knob and make my feet move. One look at him, and the two bags I’m holding hit the floor.
“Oh, Aggie,” Aunt Norma says in a hushed whisper, her words sympathetic. She scurries toward me, and without pause, she squats down to gather the bags and contents that have spilled from them.
I’m cemented to the floor, my eyes glued to Kruse’s. Other than his towering height, his appearance is different, and the force field between us is stronger, seeming reinforced by the distance that was placed between us over the last week. We’re each a magnet, the vibrations from the urge to snap together palpable.
“Uh, I will give you two time alone.” Norma turns her back to us and strides across the dining room into the kitchen.
“Aggie,” he says. His eyes finally break from mine, and he scans my whole body, but it’s not a lascivious perusal. It’s more like he’s verifying I’m truly here in front of him.
“Who told you my whereabouts?”
“Simon … after much pleading and baring of my soul and intentions.”
“What are your intentions?”
Pulling down on the bill of the black ball cap he’s wearing, he takes two slow steps toward me. This is one of the most casual ways I’ve seen him dressed, and to say he looks hot is an understatement.
Grey sweats rest low on his narrow hips, and a tight black t-shirt barely meets the top of them. If he stretched, I’d see his firm abs and the trail of hair leading into his waistband. The thought has me licking my lips.
“My intentions are to apologize and be honest with you about how I feel … for you.”
I cross my arms and scowl. “I think you said a whole hell of a lot in one tiny word.”
He shakes his head. “The second I answered Zev that day, I regretted it. Please believe me.”
“But you said it. It made me feel cheap and used.”
“That’s the furthest from how I think of you.” His long legs eat up the distance between us, and I stare at the floor once he reaches me. He braces my shoulders with his hands.
“Aggie, a friend told me that when you hurt the person who means the most to you, it will devastate you as much as it devastates them. That’s how I’ve felt since you walked away. Being aware that you’re hurting has been agonizing.”
“I have been hurting,” I say, tilting up my eyes to meet his gaze.
“I thought I was doing you a favor by pushing you away. I can’t give you everything you deserve in life, Agatha.”
I jerk away from him. “What does that even mean? I never gave you a reason to feel that way.”
He takes his hat off and yanks it back down on his head, but it doesn’t shadow his frown.
“I can’t have children.”
“Oh … OK.”
“Don’t you want kids?”
“Not particularly. I’ve spent almost twenty years being responsible for another human being. I finally feel free to live.”
“You’re one of five and have a twin. I assumed you’d want a house full of them.”
“That’s what nieces and nephews are for. Is that your reason for not accepting what’s obvious between us?”
He nods. “I’m sorry I never told you. Every time I considered it, I worried it could be the last time I’d have the privilege of being with you.”
His hand holds my chin, his thumb feathering up and down my cheek. “I was terrified it would be the deal-breaker, and I couldn’t bear it, Princess. Our time together wasn’t me using you. It was me trying to drag out not losing you.”
I slide his hand up over my cheek and cover it with mine.
“If you could have children, what would we be?”
“We’d be together … in Vegas. You’d be mine, and I’d want the world to know it.” His other hand comes up to cradle my face. “If you could forgive me, would you be with me regardless of whether or not I could have children?”
“Of course, Kruse.”
He smiles and briefly presses his lips to mine.
“You’re my person, Aggie. I love you so damn much. Please, will you forgive me?”
I nod against his hands, his loving words the bandage to my wound. Arms circle me, and he yanks me to him. Our lips meld, our magnetic beings colliding with an unstoppable force.
Whimpers crowd his heated mouth, and a shameless growl gurgles up from his chest. My back arches as my torso pushes into him, his lips and hands claiming me, reminding me who I belong to.
“Lord,” he breathes against my lips, “I’ve never missed anything so much in all my life. Please say you’ll come back to Vegas with me. I’m a begging man here.”
A mischievous grin lights up his gorgeous face, and I’m once again putty in his hands. “Absolutely, but you’re breaking the news to Norma. She’s enjoyed having me here.”
“Shit, and she was just starting to like me.” He’s still grinning, the happiness radiating from him, and I wouldn’t have to see it on his face to be aware of it. I feel it through that unexplainable bond we’re a part of. Giving me a chaste kiss, he gazes into my eyes.
“I’m going to show you the world, Aggie. Anywhere you wish to explore, I’m taking you there. I’ll fill your life with all the excitement you could crave, and we’ll help each other spoil our nieces and nephews.”
I bury my face against his chest, hardly believing he’s here and saying the most wonderful words.
“Take me home, Kruse.”
He leans back to hug my cheeks. Strong hands feel slight yet secure as his lips breeze along mine and kiss the fine corners of them.
Trailing across my bottom lip, his tongue hints of its intentions before it slips inside my willing mouth. He explores with gentle grace, stroking along the sides and tracing the edges of my tongue.
Every move is methodical, a telling story of regret and newfound appreciation. Through touch–the way a man expresses himself best–Kruse relays I’m the treasure he’ll never lose again. He makes love to my mouth, and we relish in the bond between us.
Our tongues remember … tasting and twirling.
He has given me a hit of his delectable flavor, and I sigh into him, my body giving in wholeheartedly to his secure embrace. His head drops against mine, and we breathe in each other’s billowing breaths.
“First, Princess, we’re going back to my hotel room so I can spend the next twenty-four hours cherishing your body and feeding you your favorite–cake.” He leans back and smiles.
“You paid attention.”
“To everything about you? Yes. I’ll take you home after that, where I’ll personally tell your brothers you’re mine. Say it, Aggie. Say you’re mine.”
Realizing the words I haven’t said to him, I cup his cheek.
“I’ve been yours since that first morning I met you when we were in your car, the sun rising before us. I felt joy and hope again. I love you.”
Adrian
I’m in my office on the phone when Theo taps on the door and sticks his head in. I wave him over and continue talking. Kruse follows him inside, and since I wasn’t expecting them, I end my call and lean back in my chair.
“Good morning. Is there a problem?”
I rub my forehead and think about how Kruse has been off work the last few days. I sure as hell hope he’s not quitting. Maybe he’s concerned we’ll take him down with us if this FBI shit goes south.
“Have a seat.” Gesturing toward the tan wingback chairs in my sitting area, I stroll around my desk and over to them. They take the two seats across from me and Kruse unbuttons his suit jacket, exhaling loudly in the process. “Tell me you’re not quitting.”
His brow creases, and he glides a hand over his blond hair. “Uh, no, sir. I’m hoping to leave this room with my job.”
Theo’s now looking at him, waiting to know what’s up.
“I’m just going to get right to the point. Agatha and I are dating. It’s serious, and I’d like your blessing, Mr. Cassano,” he glances to Theo, “and of course yours, too, sir.”
Theo’s eyes widen and he smiles.
Why is this funny?
“You’re telling me you’re dating my sister? A blessing for what? Are you already saying you want to marry her?” I ask.
“We’re only dating right now, sir.”
“Wait, she told me she was going to New Jersey because she was homesick. Is that where you’ve been the last few days?”
Kruse’s eyes dart to the tall windows behind my desk.
“Yes, sir. We had a misunderstanding, but I can assure you it’s been sorted out.” He looks back to me. “She’s a special woman, and I plan to treat her as such.”
I cock an eyebrow and look to Theo.
“Did everyone know about this but me?”
“I had no clue, but I think it’s great.” He shrugs while still wearing a smile. “Aside from our siblings, who can we trust more than Kruse?”
I sigh and stare hard at the man who is surely having sex with my sister. Fuck. Waving a hand toward him, I stand.
“OK, fine. You have my blessing. Just don’t fucking hurt her.”
He rises and sticks his hand out to shake mine.
“Thank you, sir. Both of you,” he adds, moving his hand to shake Theo’s next.
I try not to roll my eyes. This is awkward, but at least he was a man about it and told Theo and me before I had to hear it secondhand.
Checkmate (The Cassano Series Book 5) Page 20