by Orr, Krystal
Both women told of their illness and its debilitating symptoms. Arizira told D'jiira about Cynra's revelations to her about her Esu heritage and about Talliea being at the center of her destiny. Arizira, like Cynra, had not said anything about her pregnancy. Like her Nai'lana, she desired such news to be delivered privately.
Next came both of their journeys to find one another again; Talliea with Markahn's aid and Arizira with the mysterious white wolf's. Finally, their reunion came and a heavy air of sadness settled around both women.
Cynra had taken the opportunity to tell D'jiira of Aitla's words to her before Talliea and Arizira had ever admitted their feelings to one another.
"The Child of Whispers must experience death if her goddess is to find her way to me," she had said in a whisper.
D'jiira had exhaled sharply, her face attesting to her assiduous attention.
"Die? Your goddess spoke of the death of your granddaughter? Obviously you aided them for Arizira still breathes."
When no answer had been forthcoming, D'jiira had turned her attention to Arizira in a search for answers.
Arizira had only shaken her head slowly and allowed Talliea to continue their story. In slow, halting, and ragged tones, Talliea had told of Lao'dahn's last assault, of how he had tried once again to rape her and strip her of her dignity. A small, yet fleeting, smile had colored her lips when she'd told everyone of how Arizira had saved her yet again.
"The arrow struck right in the one thing he was so proud of," she'd said. "Arizira was still several paces away. It was a mark of her skill to land a shot so true in a target so small."
And then…
The events of the battle had been described. Talliea and Arizira told D'jiira about how both Esu and Arnira warriors and huntresses had suddenly come up about them. Arizira echoed her sentiments and thoughts of the day in question as she told her mother of Bela'luin's arrow and how it had been meant for her love, for Talliea.
"My feet were nearly in her shadow when I was pierced through the chest" Arizira had said in a wavering voice. D'jiira's eyes had been full of tears while her bottom lip trembled.
"I screamed, yet the sound was ripped from my body as if by another," Talliea had told, her fingers brushing across Arizira's cheek softly. "I caught her as she was falling. Her skin was pale, her eyes a dull shadow, and her blood --her life-- bled into the skin of my fingers."
A moment had been taken to allow both women time to collect themselves. Apart from Markahn, everyone present had tears in their eyes. Markahn's lack thereof was not due to him being uncompassionate, but for him being the type of person he was. By his upbringing, men did not cry. It was a sign of weakness. He had already shown that weakness once before when he had cried in front of Talliea and was determined to not do so again.
Arizira had wrapped a comforting and protective arm around Talliea's shoulders while Talliea had done the same. Once both of them were wrapped in the arms of the other and secure in the closeness they were sharing, the tale had continued. But, not before a promise of a kiss had been placed on Talliea's lips.
"I could feel my life passing like the seasons, fading like so much mist on a new morning. I tried to tell Tah-li a lifetime's worth of promises and love in the span of mere heartbeats. There were matters she was not aware, news she was ignorant of. I had so much I desired to tell her, but my life was fading all too quickly and the news I wished to share would only have added to her sorrow."
Talliea had swallowed over the lump in her throat at Arizira's retelling. The news her love had been referring to was that of the child she was pregnant with. D'jiira had looked both confused and intrigued, but had said nothing to interrupt.
"With the life remaining in me, I told Tah-li that I loved her, that I had always loved her, and that she had complimented me and made me better than I was alone. That is all I remembered until later," Arizira finished.
Silence hung on the air. The pain of Arizira's death still haunted Talliea and she'd found herself unable to say much in regard to it. Both Cynra and Taetylona had remained quiet, each allowing the younger women their own time in telling the final bit to their tale. As for Markahn, he had been without words. Truly without words for the first time in his life. Everything he'd been so recently told was both fantastical and lamentable; breathtaking and wretched; wondrous and forlorn.
"W-what transpired afterward?" The hoarse voice had belonged to D'jiira. Tears had lined her face, unashamed of their own visibility.
"The Esu and Arnira closed in around me. Arizira was limp and slack in my arms. I-I was beside myself. A hole had formed where once my heart had beat and a blackness, unforgiving and harrowing in its power, replaced every bit of hope Ari-sera had ever given me. I was angry. Angry at myself. Angry at my people, at the Arnira, at Lao'dahn and everyone else who had kept me from my happiness. I felt a great sense of injustice. Arizira had been the most pure and beautiful person I had ever known and for those virtues, she was dead while those that sought to bring cruelty and hate yet lived."
Talliea had paused briefly, her entire face mirroring how she'd felt the day her power had awakened in her. The day she'd believed Arizira had been taken from her. Glassy and unfocused eyes had gazed into the dancing flames of the fire while tears had fallen despite her notice.
"At the time, my entire existence up until that point had just been reuniting with my love. My body was sore and defied me, my heart was erratic and out of rhythm, and my mind was cluttered with images of my life and who I was, as well as Ari's life and who she had been. All I had wanted was just to be with her. To walk beside her. To love her. She had been taken from me, her life snuffed out like the flame of a fire. I was crying for her, for my loss. I was alone and no one could appreciate that. Both of our peoples saw only war. They saw an enemy in me instead of a person in anguish. I only desired a moment alone with my love. That was all. A single fragment in time and yet I was to be denied again.
“As I was surrounded, I remember a sudden calm coming over me. It was as if a shroud of placidity and I welcomed it. It settled my unrest. My thoughts were only on allowing me more time with my Ahmanae."
Talliea had then gone on to give, in great and vivid detail, the account of her powers manifesting themselves; from time slowing and then stopping, to the destruction of the trees and rocks that had been nearby, to disintegrating Bela'luin's arrow in mid flight.
"There was no anger in me, no hate. Only a sense of righteousness. I was in complete control and rather then allowing that sense of authority to consume me and overwhelm me, I embraced it and let it grant me what I desired: more time with Ari."
The final part of their story had been told quickly after that. Cynra and Taetylona had taken over, allowing Arizira and Talliea a moment to comfort one another. Arizira's return to life had been told, the enigmatic white wolf making yet another appearance in the sublime tale, followed by Cynra's realization and true understanding of Aitla's prophetic words to her from before.
"Experience death, Aitla had said. Her death was not a true death..."
Conversation afterward had consisted of questions and clarifications and elaborations. Everyone had answered as best as they could. D'jiira had hugged Arizira repeatedly, her awe and gratitude over matters evident every time she kissed her daughter's face. Cynra had informed her that there was still much she did not know. Arizira had nodded, a bright and anxious smile coming over her face.
When Taetylona had finally suggested that they all get some rest, no one had objected. Promises had been made to finish telling D'jiira everything she needed to know the following day. Cynra had hugged D'jiira tightly before she and Taetylona had retired to the back of the cave. It was decided that D'jiira and Markahn would take the front of the cave for their use while Talliea and Arizira would sleep under the stars. Bedrolls, cloaks, and blankets were passed among the four as final goodnights were given. Then, rest finally came to Li'nas Dei.
Chapter 23: The journey forward
Arizira a
llowed her eyes to marvel Talliea's flawless and breathtaking features.
The sun was just beginning to crest the rim of the horizon far to the east and the sky, as a result, was variegated with pinks and purples and a smattering of blue. Crickets still chirped in the distance and cicadas sang, from high in the trees, their soporific mating songs. The whole of the world had yet to fully awaken and Arizira smiled to herself. She loved the early morning nearly as much as she adored the beginnings of dusk. There was something magical and complacent about the transition from night to day and day to night.
Glowing silver-blue eyes easily traced over bronzed skin and full soft lips. They moved over high cheekbones and across lush eyelashes before falling on the gentle rise and fall of Talliea's chest. Arizira's fingers moved and landed near to Talliea's heart. A steady beat continuously met the tip of her fingers, its pleasing vibration seeming to sing to her soul.
Lying on Talliea's right, Arizira leaned across her love and placed a tender kiss on each of her closed eyelids. Lips whispered soothing caresses down the slope of Talliea's nose and across her cheeks, while fingers slipped past the confines of a thin cream-colored blouse to connect with warm, soft skin.
A moan, freely given yet barely uttered, left Talliea's throat. Arizira smoothed her fingers across the inviting skin of her chest and flattened her palm over her heart. She continued to pepper Talliea's face with soft and gentle kisses as the sun continued to rise in the sky and bathe the world in light.
Arizira's actions were not hurried, nor meant to be anything other than an expression of her feelings for Talliea. She did not seek any other physicality. Her slow and reverent kisses were just that. In the break before the world came to life, and by its birth her own journey set to begin, Arizira wished nothing more than just to enjoy a few simple moments with the woman she loved. Soon, the others would be awake and their day would be filled with further conversations and decisions and planning. They would embark on a peregrination that none could know the outcome of.
So, for a moment, Arizira enjoyed the feeling of Talliea's skin beneath her lips. She savored the warmth that embraced her fingers and appreciated something that was so easy, so needed, and yet so hard to come by in her life of late.
"Mmm, what are you doing?" Talliea's voice, raspy from being asleep, asked in a low whisper.
Arizira, instead of answering, leaned her forehead against Talliea's until their noses touched. The hand she still had in Talliea's shirt moved and fingers spread out along a flushed collarbone and neck. The sounds of insects began to fade away as the songs of birds sought to greet the new day.
"Admiring you," Arizira answered in an equally low tone of voice. Her breath washed across Talliea's lips. "I miss you all the time, even though you are here with me."
Talliea, continuing to wake up, wrapped one arm behind Arizira's back while the other landed on her cheek. She could feel Arizira's desire for closeness, as well as hear the small twinge of necessity in her voice.
"I am right here, love. In this moment, only the two of us exist. Just like before."
Arizira closed her eyes when she felt Talliea's hand move from her face and into her hair. Fingers massaged her scalp and she could not repress the contented sigh that left her lips.
"How I wish that were true, failira."
Talliea turned her head slightly and placed the gentlest of kisses behind Arizira's ear. "It is true, Ari. There is only you, only me. Just touch me, if only for a moment."
Arizira did as Talliea told her. She tried to imagine that there was nothing to concern herself with other than being with the woman she loved. She tried to convince herself that she and Talliea were still alone in their cave far to the west, ignorant of their peoples' growing hatred of one another, and having only a need for one another. For just a snippet of time, Arizira told herself that there was no possibility of war, no journey to take, no barely explained powers or destinies, or prophecies of the future.
To her, there was only Talliea. Only them. She embraced that belief and gave it the power to momentarily engross her.
Turning her head to look down into Talliea's face, Arizira smiled. She trailed her fingers over Talliea's chin and jaw before lowering her head to kiss her. Mint danced on their tongues. The two of them kissed slowly for several minutes, neither desiring to rush the cherished moment they were in. Talliea tangled her hand in Arizira's hair and tightened her hold around her back. Their kiss intensified for but a moment before Arizira turned her head to the side. She rested her cheek against Talliea's forehead and closed her eyes again, willing her mind to believe that the two of them were alone and the world was not as blemished, damaged, and wanting as it seemed of late.
She felt Talliea kiss the side of her jaw while hands and arms wrapped around her neck, shoulders, and head. For an uncounted number of breaths, the two of them remained that way: Surrounded by each other. The sun was steadily rising higher into the sky and the world continued to wake from its natural slumber. Already, the scent of morning flowers and pine was catching on the early morning breeze that heralded a new day.
"I am sorry," Arizira murmured, her cheek still lying softly against Talliea's forehead.
"For what?"
"For this moment of ambiguity, for hesitating in my convictions when it was I asking you to make a stand for peace."
Talliea took a deep and calming breath. She could feel Arizira's fingers grazing along the underside of her chin and neck. Kissing the other woman's jaw again, she said, "There is no need for apologies, love. What we seek to do is...daunting. Allow us to just lie here with one another as the world wakes."
Arizira and Talliea were silent for time, both enjoying being alone with the other. Each were lost to their individual thoughts. Arizira felt divided. Never before had she questioned her desire to do what was right, but today was different. Today, she only wanted to be with Talliea., away from everything and everyone else. She wondered if the Esu woman's hesitation from the day before had somehow been shifted to her, for now a part of her ached to do nothing but run away from her responsibilities.
Talliea, while still firm in her stance to keep Arizira and their baby safe, seemed to have accepted her responsibility, though with a strong timorousness. Her lack of faith had little to do with her own abilities and more to do with what exactly they all hoped to accomplish and how they intended to go about matters. She supposed that Arizira was feeling some of the same emotions she was, experiencing some of the same doubts.
"I love you," she said suddenly, deciding to lead them away from the uncertainties of the future. The three words were whispered against Arizira's skin and she smiled, her heart lifting. "Do you remember when we first met?" Talliea asked.
Arizira lifted her head and looked down into dark and deep eyes. Placing her fingers against the pulse of Talliea's neck, she nodded.
"Of course, failira. You captured my imagination and I felt compelled to seek your presence. You fascinated me like no other and your beauty was unrivaled and without peer. As I told you before, I loved you the moment I saw you."
Blushing at Arizira's words, Talliea felt her heart begin to beat faster. Despite everything the two of them had been through, the ups and the downs, the highs and the lows, Arizira still had the ability to leave her breathless and in a state of wonder.
"I felt so alone that night, Ari. My whole life, I had been surrounded by the men and women of my clan. We prayed together, celebrated together, ate together and communed every morning. Yet, I felt alone, imprisoned by the restraints of my life. There was no happiness. No chance of love or of friendship. All I had to look forward to was the very solitude that kept me confined. Each day was the same as the one before it, with all future days destined to be the same. There was nothing to look forward to as every action of my life, every deed and occurrence had already been determined."
Arizira listened to Talliea with avid interest. She did not know where her love was going with her words, but she minded them all the same.
"The night we met, I had nearly convinced myself to run away from my clan. They provided me with the basic needs of life: food, water, shelter. Yet, of friendship, of love and the feeling of being appreciated and adored, I was starving. I felt as if I was dying from the inside out and it was almost welcome. If I was numb to everything, perhaps I could finally be what others desired me to be. But, that night, I met you. You looked at me like I was noticeable. Our first meeting lasted only a matter of seconds, but you made me feel more alive than I had in all the previous years of my life."
Arizira rubbed her thumb across Talliea's throat while her fingers stayed next to her pulse. "Why do you tell me this, Tah-li?"
"Because, it does not matter to me that we are surrounded by others, Ari. They are our friends and they make me feel loved. Even with them being near, all you have to do is look at me and, in my mind, we are alone. I am no longer forsaken, Ahmanae. Whether in the company of Cynra and the others, or alone with you as we are now, I am satisfied because I can make a moment with you. A memory."
"Like now?" Arizira asked.
Talliea nodded. "Like now."
An amused smile touched Arizira's lips. "When did you become so wise?"
"Perhaps your sage disposition was shared when we were last together," Talliea replied dryly.
The two of them laughed. Arizira leaned forward and kissed Talliea's lips once, then twice before pulling away to look, once again, into her eyes. They appreciated one another for a long moment. Neither spoke. Fingers lazily explored any exposed skin as the morning grew.
"I wish I knew what to expect," Talliea's voice broke the silence. "Do you think your people will embrace the peace we desire? Do you think they will listen to us?"
Arizira sighed and turned her head slightly to the side in thought. "I cannot speak words of sureness, failira. Talyn is a wise leader, but fear and enmity are powerful influences. Many of my sisters will use them to justify their actions, however abhorrent. There are those among the Elders’ Council who believe that Talyn is too lax, that she hides behind illusions of peace and cedes when she should make a stand. The tribe nearest to ours now has control of a portion of our hunting lands because Talyn, many seasons ago, negotiated a treaty with them. In exchange for our territory, we now trade across the Menderway instead of hunting as we once did. Since that time, many of the Elders have questioned Talyn's resolve."