Ashes on the Waves

by Mary Lindsey

  We found the trapdoor leading to the lower level of hidden passageways easily, and Anna descended first. “How do we know which way to go to find the way out to the sea?” she asked. “There are three directions we could take from here.”

  I watched my candle flutter, the flame leaning toward me and slightly to the left. Any breeze or air movement had to come from the tunnel leading to the outside. “It’s this way,” I said, taking the tunnel ahead of me to the right.

  “Man. I get all turned around down here. I’m glad you know where you’re going.”

  “James Bond always knows where he’s going.”

  As we proceeded, the salty smell increased, confirming I was correct. The tunnel curved slightly to the left and took a sharp left turn around a large boulder. Before we made it all the way around the boulder, a golden cloud appeared in front of us. It materialized into a beautiful, shimmering woman.

  “Oh, crap,” Anna said. “Not this again.”

  The figure held a finger to her lips, then blew out our candles. As quickly as she had appeared, she was gone, leaving us in total darkness.

  Anna stomped her foot in the dirt. “What the h—”

  I put my candle in my teeth and covered her mouth. She immediately fell silent. I peeked around the boulder. From farther down the tunnel the round beam of a flashlight swung to and fro. Someone was coming our way. I crammed the candle in my pocket and pulled Anna back in the direction from which we had come. After wedging into a crag in the wall that I had noticed behind the boulder, I pulled her in tight against me.

  There was no sound other than our breathing and no light for what seemed like forever. Just as I decided the person had gone back the other way, the light arced across the stone on the other side of the tunnel. The person was close, probably just on the other side of the boulder. I felt Anna take a big breath and hold it. I did the same.

  With a slight crunching underfoot, the person passed us, light trained on the ground. The shape was unmistakable.

  Anna let her breath out soundlessly once Miss Ronan had passed around the curve out of view. I nudged Anna, and she stepped from the crag. I pulled her with me around the large boulder and leaned against it until my heart stopped pounding. I removed the candle and the lighter from my pocket and lit it. “We only need one,” I whispered.

  Almost running, we proceeded through the tunnel until a light appeared ahead of us. Moonlight. I blew out my candle and enjoyed the cool wind on my face. My relief ended abruptly when we stepped outside.

  “Oh, my God,” Anna said, staring at the whirling golden clouds over our heads.

  “You should tone it down a bit so the Na Fir Ghorm d-don’t see you,” Muireann said from our right. She wore my shirt and was shivering.

  “Tone what down?” I asked.

  “Oh, hi, Liam, and Liam’s female.” She gave us an awkward, closed-fingered wave. “I wasn’t t-talking to you. I was talking to thÀtalking e B-Bean Sidhes.”

  The clouds reduced in size to small puffs the size of my outstretched hand.

  “I was afraid you weren’t c-c-coming. Then I was afraid you w-were coming. Brigid Ronan was wandering around out here and it c-could have been bad.” Her body shuddered. “How do you stand b-b-being c-cold all the time?”

  “We’re not cold. You’re cold because you’re wearing a wet shirt,” I said.

  “Oh.” She ripped the shirt off over her head. “Now I’m not.”

  I cast my eyes down and Anna gasped.

  “I’m still c-c-c-cold. You were wr-r-r-ong.”

  I slipped off the jacket and passed it to Anna.

  “Here, put this on,” Anna said quietly. When I looked up, she had buttoned the jacket, which hung halfway down Muireann’s thighs, and was rolling up the sleeves for the trembling Selkie.

  “When I sh-sh-shed my pelt the first time, I g-g-got really cold and Francine had Liam lie s-skin to skin with me. It worked very well.”

  Anna finished the second sleeve and smiled over her shoulder at me. “I bet it did.”

  The cliff rose straight up from the beach in a sheer wall of stone. The tunnel was clearly man-made, judging from the perfectly round opening, as opposed to some others in various places around the island that had been carved over time by the tide. The small beach was cut off from the rest of the shoreline by dense vegetation butting up to the enormous boulders on either end of it. The only way to reach it would be by boat or through the tunnel.

  “I feel much better now.” Muireann reached out and touched Anna’s dress. “Pretty,” she said.

  The Bean Sidhes began making noise that sounded more like a chant than a scream, though it was still uncomfortable.

  “Okay,” Muireann said. “I’ve never seen a human handfasting ceremony or an Otherworld bonding, so they are going to tell me what to do.”

  “You can understand them?” Anna asked, sliding her candle into the pocket of the coat Muireann wore.

  “Yes. They speak an ancient language known only to the Otherworld.” She shoved her hands into the pockets of the jacket and stared up at the chanting puffs of gold. “They want to be sure you understand what you are about to do.”

  “Only in general principle,” I said. “Handfasting vows are terminable and sometimes used on a trial basis among my people. How does this differ?”

  Anna slipped her hand into mine.

  The chanting increased in volume, as if they were speaking in unison. Muireann nodded.

  “Well, it’s pretty much the same, except it’s deeper. Instead of it just being a promise made with words, it’s a comingling of your spirits. See, even if you split up in human terms, your souls are mixed together, so the bond will carry over into the Otherworld.” She paused and listened again. “They want me to give you a way to understand it that will make sense.”

  The chanting continued and Muireann appeared agitated. “Okay, I’ll tell them, but we need to get this done before we are discovered.” She gestured to the golden forms swirling overhead. “They say your soul is like water. Formless. It conforms to whatever shape it is in. So imagine you have two cups and a pitcher. The cups are full of water. YouÀof water pour them both into the pitcher and then pour from the pitcher back into the cups. The water from each cup, once unique, has been mixed. It is impossible to sort it back out again. That is what will happen with your souls. You will be part of each other until the end of the term.”

  She stared up at the Bean Sidhes. “Okay, okay. They also want you to know that since you are anam cara, you have already experienced what it will feel like to some degree.” She stomped her foot. “Enough already. They get it.” She stared from me to Anna. “So are you good with this? A bonding of the minimum month and a day will be sufficient.”

  Anna squeezed my hand and smiled when our eyes met. The fact that she would even consider such a proposition nearly drove me to my knees. “I’m in,” she said.

  Unable to form words, I simply nodded.

  Muireann grinned. “Great.” She tipped her face up to the golden wisps. “Now what?” She covered her mouth. “Oops. I forgot.” She turned in a circle, searching the beach for something. “I was supposed to tell you to bring a cord. Something to bind your hands with.” She huffed. “I guess the pretty window and the lamp distracted me.”

  Anna slipped the tie off from around my neck. “How about this?”

  Muireann grinned and clapped. “Oooh. Perfect!” She snatched it from Anna and held it up in the air. “Now what?” She nodded. “Okay. Now this is the part where you face each other and clasp right hand to right hand and left to left, crossed over . . . yes. Just like that.” She skipped around us like an excited child. The Bean Sidhes chanted louder and took the forms of women. Muireann put her fingers in her ears. “Oh, this is great. I can’t do this in my seal form,” she yelled. “Here’s the good part. We are going to keep it really simple and short.” She put the ends of the tie together and put it folded in half over our hands. “Now, you humans do this differentl
y. You do a lot of stuff for show. All I need is for you to tell me why you are here. You first, Liam.”

  I stared at the bloodred tie draped over our clasped hands. “I am here to be bonded to Annabel Leighton.”

  Muireann drew one end of the tie through the loop hanging across the other side and stared at Anna. “And?”

  “I’m here to be bonded to Liam MacGregor.” Anna too was staring at our hands.

  Muireann pulled the other end of the tie through the loop and pulled down on both ends, tightening it. “Why?”

  I had expected to repeat phrases and answer yes-and-no questions like in the handfasting ceremonies I’d attended in the village. The why of this was far too complex to put into words.

  “Liam. This is the part where you state why you want to bonded to her body and soul. It’s a requirement,” Muireann said, stomping her foot. “You can’t just stand there.”

  Anna’s smiling flawless face in the moonlight gave me words. “I want to be bonded to her because I love her. I’ve always loved her and I always will. And the very fact that she would stand here and agree to be bonded to me makes me the happiest person on earth.”

  Anna lowered her eyes to our hands while Muireann tied a knot in the ends of the tie under the loop, then ran the ends up and over the loop again. Muireann grinned and bounced up and down, then looked expectantly at Anna.

  When she raised her eyes, my heart stopped. She took a shuddering breath, never taking her eyes frÀg her eyom mine, addressing me directly. “I want this because when we’re apart, I can’t breathe. You’re like oxygen. You love me for who I am and you let me be who I am, which no one has ever done before. I can’t imagine life without you. I don’t want a life without you. And I will do everything in my power to never be without you again.”

  Time stopped. Nothing could surpass this moment. Pure exquisite emotion flowed through her hands to my heart.

  “How long a term?” Muireann whispered. “You have to specify a length of bonding.”

  I was too overcome to answer. I couldn’t even draw breath.

  “Forever,” Anna said, still staring into my eyes. “Forever, Liam.”

  I shook my head. She didn’t understand. This was real. Irrevocable. “You only need to do this for a month and a day.”

  Her hand trembled in mine. “What don’t you understand, Liam? Look around. We’re on a beach with a Selkie and floating golden magical screeching things. This isn’t business as usual. This is meant to happen. Fated. I want you forever. If you don’t want me, tell me now. Don’t screw around with me. Don’t keep anticipating my needs or predicting my future regrets. I know what I need and want. What do you want?”

  “Oh! Oh, I really like her,” Muireann said. “No wonder you told me you could love no one else.”

  The Bean Sidhes had fallen silent, leaving only the lapping of the sea and my breathing to accompany my racing mind and heart. Surely this was a dream. A marvelous dream from which I would wake at any moment because it was too perfect to be real.

  “What is it going to be, Liam?” Muireann asked.

  I stared at the girl I had loved all my life, her pale skin and raven hair reflecting the moon, far more beautiful than a dream could be. There was no other sane response. “Forever,” I whispered.

  Muireann squeaked in delight and tied the loose ends together again. “Okay, this is the part where you pledge yourselves to each other for the amount of time you have agreed upon.”

  The Bean Sidhes chanted and Muireann translated. “So as this knot is tied, your souls will be likewise bound upon your declaration to make it so.” She nodded to me.

  I stared into Anna’s blue eyes. “I wish to be bound to you forever. In this life and whatever comes after.”

  “Yes, forever. Eternity,” Anna said, and at the moment the words were uttered, a gale-force wind swept around us, lifting sand and smaller particles with it to where we were forced to close our eyes. Anna buried her face in my chest, our bound hands clenched tightly. It felt as though the ground beneath us had shifted or fallen away completely and we were falling end over end. The Bean Sidhes’ cries sounded distant and the temperature dropped to where our teeth chattered. Just when I thought I could no longer bear it, the earth around us became solid again and a complete wash of warmth filled my body. I opened my eyes. We were on our knees, hands still bound.

  “Wow,” Anna said. “That was trippy.”

  Neither Muireann nor the Bean Sidhes were anywhere in sight. The jacket was laid over a rock and the sopping T-shirt was still in a heap on the beach where it had been discarded.

  “So, what do we do about this?” Anna lifted our bound hands.

  “We try to extricate ourselves without breaking the knots.”Àthe knot Which would be difficult with my useless hand.

  She made her snort-through-her-nose sound. “Supernatural Celtic creepies’ version of a Chinese finger trap, huh?” She looped her finger through the section around my right wrist and pulled some slack. “Can you pull your hand out?”

  It worked, and with the removal of that hand, the rest became looser and slipped off easily.

  “Okay,” she said in a voice imitative of Muireann’s, “this is the part where we sneak back into the house and we celebrate all night long, right?”

  I answered by passing her the candle from the jacket I had just slipped on.

  The way back up the tunnel seemed half as long as it had been on our way out. We could hear banging and Miss Ronan shouting before we even entered her room. “Miss Leighton. I have strict orders from your parents that Mr. MacGregor is not to be in this house after nightfall. Stop ignoring me and open this door.”

  I shoved the dresser back in place in front of the hidden panel, leaned against it, and pulled Anna to me.

  “He must leave!”

  Anna’s body molded to mine. A perfect fit in all ways. I captured her mouth in a kiss.

  “Open the door! I’ll call your parents. They won’t like this.”

  Whatever had occurred during the bonding had left me single-minded. I wanted Anna—I needed her. And I certainly wasn’t going to let Brigid Ronan get in the way. Anna groaned as I pulled away. “Hold that thought,” I said.

  When I opened the door, Miss Ronan gasped. “You are wearing his clothes again.” Her eyes narrowed. “How dare you! Leave this minute.”

  I kept my voice low and level, leaning down to meet her eyes directly. “I understand and appreciate your position, but let me make mine perfectly clear. I’m not leaving tonight. If you feel compelled to report this to Anna’s parents, by all means, do so. If your intention is to bodily eject me yourself, attempt it now. Otherwise, I want you to go away and not bother us again. Have I made my position clear to you?”

  Her face flushed red. “You have no idea what you are doing. What kind of danger you are in. Both of you.”

  I stood up straight, fightin

  g the urge to shout, keeping my voice barely above a whisper. “Every day I live is an unexpected gift. I’ve been in danger from the moment I was born. You’ve made sure of that. Go now, and leave us be.”

  Her mouth opened as if she were going to protest, but she clamped it shut, spun around, and stomped down the stairs.

  I locked the door, feeling unstoppable. Brigid Ronan had backed completely down and I faced a night alone with the most perfect human being on the planet. Even if the Cailleach took me this very night, I had succeeded in taking control of my life and getting what I wanted. And at that moment, more than anything in the world, I wanted Anna Leighton.

  Anna grinned. “Wow, Liam. Well done.”

  I ran my lips along her neck and she wrapped her arms around me. “I do other things well too.”

  She took my face in her hands. “Wait a minute. Is this the same guy who told me he was terrified?”

  “No. That was someone entirely different,” I said. “Now that I have your love, I’ve nothing to fear. Not in this world, or the one that comes after.” I switched off
theÀtched of light and the moonlight that streamed through the stained glass danced across her skin in a dreamlike kaleidoscope. “With you, I’m completely within my comfort zone.”

  35

  “Villains!” I shrieked, “dissemble no more!”

  —Edgar Allan Poe,

  from “The Tell-Tale Heart,” 1843

  Muireann was thrilled. She had finally done something to help her Liam. Something that would keep him safe from the Na Fir Ghorm. What good would it do to split them apart if their souls were bound forever?

  Forever! She twirled around and took another breath before diving under. Liam’s female was strong and wonderful and worthy of him. Surely now, the Na Fir Ghorm would drop the wager. The Bean Sidhes said they didn’t even care about winning; they just didn’t want the Na Fir Ghorm to hurt the humans.

  Muireann swam to the entrance of the cave and let air out through her mouth. She wished she could breathe and speak underwater like the Na Fir Ghorm. In the darkness, she couldn’t see the column of bubbles rising to the surface, but she could hear it. She hoped the creatures inside the cave could hear it too because there was no way she was going to swim inside.

  It worked. One of them came to the entrance. “The Selkie has hailed us,” he called into the cave.

  Releasing all of her breath while that deep made her a little light-headed, but she didn’t have time to waste. Empty lungs stinging, she shot to the surface and sucked in the sweet air. She needed to get to the island so that she was not out in open water when they emerged from their cave. Even though the Otherworld laws forbade them to kill her, the Na Fir Ghorm had never been ones to adhere to rules. Hopefully, they would listen to logic.

  The Bean Sidhes hovered above the rocky ledge, waiting. Muireann propelled out of the water, landing on her belly with an oof. She shuffled and wiggled away from the water. Legs would have been helpful at this moment, she thought as she turned to face her enemy. “They are coming,” she said to the nebulous golden forms overhead.