by Kristi Jun
~ ~ ~
Ms. McBride was frustrating as hell.
He walked into his room, closed the door, and locked it. Pulling off his clothes one by one, he stood there fully naked and splashed cold water on his face from the washbasin left on the table for him. Once finished, he slipped between the sheets and closed his eyes.
Bloody hell, he was hard. He didn’t need this now. Their lives were both complicated, and he knew this full well, yet his body had other plans for him. All he could think about right now was thrusting himself into her and feeling her tightness around his cock.
He took in a deep breath and tried to think about anything but Kate. He focused on his mother’s investigation. Yes, that would be helpful. The young woman who had been working for his mother that night was missing, but his assistant was inquiring about her whereabouts and Roberts hoped he had good news for him.
Tomorrow morning, he’d speak with him about this and find out if he made any headway. He allowed his breath to slow. Within several minutes of focusing on his breath, he finally relaxed.
CHAPTER 5
“You seem unwell,” his mother said from behind the bars. She brought a candle closer to him. “You’re not ill, are you?”
“No,” he said. He had woken in the middle of the night smiling like a schoolboy with thoughts of Kate’s hands doing ungodly things to him. In his dream, she had snuck into his room with nothing on but a sheer robe and slipped under his sheets with him.
He didn’t fall back asleep until nearly five in the morning. He was beginning to think agreeing to staying a Blackthorn Hall with her was a bad idea. It was a bad idea. She was this intoxicating elixir that was slowly killing him.
“Come closer so I can see you better.”
She reached out to touch his cheek. “What is troubling you?”
He didn’t want her to worry any more than she had to. “It’s nothing you need to worry about.”
“How can you say that to me when you are all I have left? I want you to be happy. If coming here troubles you, I’d rather you didn’t visit me anymore.”
“It isn’t that.”
“Then what is it?” she said. “And don’t try to spare my feeling. I will only end up worrying about you while I am in here unable to do anything about it.”
What could he say? That he couldn’t find the one person that had the ability to set her free? That he was hitched to a woman who may be guilty of murder?
“My stubborn boy,” she trailed off and her eyes lowered. “Tell me.”
“Don’t worry about me,” he said. “Take care of yourself until I get you out of here. I must go, I am meeting someone.”
His mother started to protest, but she gave him a smile. “Thank you for the books you sent me yesterday.”
“It’s the least I can do.”
He was let out of the Newgate Prison through the visitor’s entrance and he headed for Bow Street. He had an appointment to speak with his assistant today. After that, a lesson on using a pistol with Ms. McBride.
~ ~ ~
“I do not require your assistance.”
The first lesson he insisted on was teaching her how to load a pistol properly. It was easy enough, although quite methodical. Then cleaning the darn thing. He insisted she do this at least three times. The shooting part, however, proved to be more difficult. He had several rocks lined up on a taller rock at the back of the house for her to shoot at.
Honestly, how did he expect her to shoot the rock from this distance? “My target, Mr. Roberts, isn’t realistic.”
“How so?”
“I will most likely shoot at a person, not a rock that is the size of my shoe.”
“Aim and try again.”
“This is my half dozenth attempt, Mr. Roberts.”
“Again.”
She sighed and aimed at the rock about ten yards away, but before she could fire, he quickly walked around her and braced her from behind.
“Hold your pistol like so,” he said, gripping her hand in his and guiding her to hold it properly.
The warmth of his touch caught her off guard. Too close and quite intimidating and…well, big. That was the only word that came to mind. She fit within his embrace perfectly, she thought as he held her hand firm and tight.
“Steady your hand.”
“I am trying.”
He leaned in closer, his jaw nearly touching her temple. “See the tip of your barrel? Look at that point if it helps and pull the lever. Keep your hand and arm steady.”
She fidgeted to get some distance from him and accidently hit him in the ribs. He made a grunting noise and pulled away, touching the place she’d hit him.
“I’m sorry,” she said, putting the pistol down on the table next to them. Her eyes rose to meet his.
“It’s just an old injury, Kate.”
Her heart leapt at the sound of her name on his tongue. “All right, Kane.” He must have just realized what he had done, because he seemed caught off guard.
“I didn’t mean—”
“It’s all right,” she said. As of late, everything in her life seemed to have turned upside down, and she rather liked this light teasing. Besides, he was always too sober, too serious. “You can call me Kate. But only if I can call you Kane.”
“You may not call me Kane,” he said. “Roberts, yes, but not Kane.”
She shook her head. “No?” she teased. “Why not?”
He looked confounded at first. “The only person who called me Kane was my father. And he is dead.” The look on his face suddenly became solemn again.
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be.”
She wasn’t sure what to say next. Had something happened between them before he died? Clearly, he did not want to discuss the matter from the expression on his face, and she had no desire to start up a conversation she was going to regret. “What is your middle name, then?”
His eyes sought hers. “Thomas.”
“Thomas it is.”
He shook his head. “No one calls me Thomas.”
“That is precisely why I will,” she said with a smile. For a moment, he said nothing. Then, slowly closing their distance, he looked down at her with such intensity that it made her heart pump wildly with delight. She reached up and touched a strand of hair on his forehead. He didn’t stop her. Good. A sensuous light passed between them and her heart leaped again. If she kissed him, would he reject her? Why did she want this from him? She wasn’t sure. Call it loneliness? She wanted to know this man had a heart. She stepped closer to him.
“But only in private.”
“All right… Thomas,” she whispered.
In their dalliance, their eyes locked, and he leaned in to her and kissed her unexpectedly. His kiss was soft and warm. What was that hint of something spicy and fragrant on him? She didn’t resist; instead she was eager, and she kissed him back. His slipped his tongue into her mouth and she welcomed it with excitement.
His hands came up from the small of her back and cupped her bosom. Pulling the bodice down to release her breast, he ran his thumb across her nipple. Her thoughts spun with dizzying sensation. Her body suddenly reacted to him in a way that shook her core, hungry and burning, with a need she didn’t know she had.
Her fingers wove in and out of the thick locks of his hair. Her eyes closed when his finger ran across her nipple again and again. In the haziness of lust and wanting, it took a moment to realize there was a distant cry…or rather a laughter.
Realizing who it was, she swiftly pulled her bodice up. Within seconds, Francis came running around the corner with the three-legged dog chasing her. Even after she saw them, her body was drunk with the sensation of his magical strokes.
“Kate, Kate,” Francis said. “Look what I have.” Francis handed her a handful of white daises she had picked and gathered in her hand. “It’s for you,” she said. Plucking one out of the bouquet, she handed Kate the daisies.
“For me, Francis?” she said, lowering
her eyes. “Thank you.”
“It’s for being so nice to all of us. You’ve been like an aunt to me, and I don’t have one.”
“What’s more important is that I will always be there for you, Francis,” Kate said with a smile. “Who is that for?” Kate asked.
“This is for you, Mr. Roberts.” Francis lifted her hand that held the single daisy and gave it to him. “You’ve been so nice to Kate.”
He glanced at Kate with a smile. “I try.”
“Are you going to get married?”
“Married?” Kate asked.
“The two of you.” Her tone was a matter-of-fact.
“Francis,” Kate started. “Mr. Roberts is here just as a friend.”
“Oh?” Francis said, picking up the pup that was jumping on her one hind leg to get their attention. “Friends don’t marry?”
“Come,” Kate started. “Let’s go inside. Shall we continue the lesson later, then?” When Roberts nodded, she guided Francis back inside. Trying her best to ignore the burning heat where he had touched her, she continued without looking back.
From the brief encounter and the looks of him, she was glad to know he was affected by her as much as she was by him. Good to know the man wasn’t a stiff.
It was rather strange when she was with him. He made her forget her troubles and made her long for things that were impossible.
He was a lawman, and she despised lawmen. She spent half her life running from them. This situation was an impossibility.
CHAPTER 6
Kate stood in front of the Foundling Hospital early the next morning.
It was a large building with unadorned rectangular windows on three floors. Once a month, she volunteered one day and brought provisions for the children. She learned about this place through Amelia, and she was thankful for it.
Wanting to do what she could, she insisted she be treated like everyone else in the hospital and not a patron. She was asked to help with the cooking, cleaning the rooms, and reading to the children. These simple tasks brought meaning to her life that she was contributing something positive in the lives of these orphans.
One would never guess by simply observing the building that this place was filled with unwanted children that were neatly put away from the view of society.
She understood this place well, didn’t she? Although this was no workhouse, it reminded her of one in Boston where she had spent three months in the cold and cruel place. She eventually ran away to make her own path on the streets.
Yet, there was a sense of hope. Perhaps that was why she was here—to shine a glimmer of new beginnings and possibilities that they too could thrive if they had the will.
Looking back to make certain she wasn’t followed, she stepped through the door and into the large foyer. The cries of abandoned babies punctuated the air, and her heart leaped with the need to sooth their pain.
A nurse in her late fifties came rushing to Kate. “Good, you are just in time, Ms. B.”
“Good morning,” she said. She didn’t want to reveal her identity, so she had informed the staff and children to call her Ms. B. The nurses and the children didn’t question her request. In addition to this, she had requested that she wasn’t to be given any special treatment or recognition of her deeds. All she wanted to do was give back to the children in need.
“We had a new arrival this morning and she simply won’t relent. Do you mind helping out a bit so that I can have breakfast ready for the children?”
“Of course,” Kate said. “Please take this.” Kate handed her a basket full of linens, spices, and provisions.
“My dear, you are a blessing. Let me put this away and introduce you to the baby.”
Kate followed the nurse into a large room with minimal furniture. There were two rectangular tables large enough to have about twenty children sit at each. This was where the older children gathered to eat in the morning.
There, another nurse was holding a wailing baby, trying to do her best to comfort the infant. The instant Kate saw them, her maternal instinct kicked in and she longed to hold it. The nurse handed her an infant baby who looked to be no more than a few days old.
“God’s gift and no one seems to want her,” the nurse said, caressing the baby’s cheek. “Usually the mothers leave a token or a trinket to identify the baby when they are dropped off, so they can claim the child later when they are ready to take them home.”
“They didn’t leave anything with her?”
The nurse replied, “Nothing.”
The infant’s eyes were barely open, and her mouth made a sucking motion.
“Not a single thing, poor child,” the nurse said. “I believe an older woman dropped her off.” She looked at the infant. “Usually they are not this young.”
“I will be all right, nurse. Go on.” Kate smiled.
As soon the baby opened her eyes, her heart squeezed. She desperately wanted to snatch her up and take her home with her. These children didn’t even have a name; instead, they were given a number while they were here. If they were fortunate to be adopted by a family to raise them, they would be given a name. If Amelia was here, she would, no doubt, take the baby in her arms and take her home without a second thought, but Kate did not have that kind of courage.
“Let’s go for a stroll in the garden, shall we?” she whispered to the infant with a smile. They strolled down the hallway toward the back of the house and exited the house through a French door that lead to the small rose garden the nurses kept at the back of the property. The sun shone above them, and Kate looked up and smiled. “Beautiful day.”
Slowly walking through the full bloom of red and white roses, she felt the cool breeze on her face. A sense of tranquility came over her. Looking down at the infant, the baby’s brown eyes reflected the smile in her own eyes.
“How could anyone possibly give you up?” she whispered to the infant looking up at her.
“Shall we give you a name? How about…umm… Sarah?” She paused. Her heart sank with grief as buried memories came rushing back to her.
Sarah…
It happened so fast and she hadn’t expected it. The tragedy of having lost a child before giving birth nearly destroyed her emotionally and physically. She couldn’t eat, nor sleep, for days. It was a secret she kept deep in her heart. As naïve as she was at the time, she thought she’d been in love, but he had lied about everything. Once she allowed him to touch her, he had disappeared. She hadn’t seen him since that night. Hot tears threatened to burst, but she held them back.
“Ms. B?” The nurse walked over to her. “The wet nurse should be here in about thirty minutes.”
As soon as Kate turned to face her, her expression changed. “Are you all right, Ms. B?”
“Yes, I am all right,” Kate said. “I am sorry, but it seems I won’t be able to stay very long today. I have some matters to attend to.” She handed the nurse the baby girl she had been holding.
“I hope everything is all right.” The nurse soothed the baby when it started to cry. “There, there, child,” she said, allowing the infant to suck on her pinky.
“Thank you for your kindness.” Kate gave her a smile. “I shall return next month.”
“We should be thanking you,” the nurse said with a smile. “You are a godsend, Ms. B.”
If only you knew the truth. With that thought, she quickly left the property.
~ ~ ~
“Saving those lost souls isn’t going to ease your own demons, Kate.”
She jumped. “Goodness,” Kate said to Johnathan. “Are you spying on me?”
“Spying isn’t the exact word.”
“What are you doing here, Johnathan?” There were dark circles under his eyes and he reeked of booze. She looked around to see the passersby. “Don’t make a scene, not here.”
“Come, let’s perambulate.”
“Perambulate?” she said. “No.”
“You owe me.”
“For what, may I ask? For threatin
g to drag me home. For accusing me of killing your brother?”
He narrowed his eyes at her. “You owe me,” he said louder.
Several passersby gawked at them. “Mr. Roberts is expecting me within an hour at the estate. If I am late—”
“You won’t be late.” He waved her carriage to go without her and he escorted her to his rented one. “Get in.”
“What are you going to do? Strangle me, dump my body in the Thames, and call it even?” she said angrily.
“You are a pain in my ass. Get in. Or I will toss you in there.”
She stepped in and sat down on the seat opposite him. “Say what you must, so we can get this over with.”
“What was in the letter?”
There was absolutely no privacy with this man. “You mean you didn’t read it for yourself?”
“You know damn well I didn’t.”
“It’s private.”
“From my mother.”
“She may have been your mother, but she—”
“Don’t you dare.”
“This is how you are going to punish me, isn’t it?”
“This isn’t punishment, it’s what you deserve.”
“I don’t understand why you didn’t keep it in the first place.”
“I promised her I’d to give it to you.”
“And now you have, so let it go.”
“You are an ungrateful bitch.”
“No matter what you say to me,” she hissed, “it won’t change anything. I didn’t kill Ethan, and I too grieved for your mother when I heard the news, just as I grieve for Ethan.”
His eyes grew hot and angry and she feared what he’d do next. “I am going to make your life miserable until you return to Boston with me and admit you killed Ethan.”
“What could I possibly have done to you that you are doing this to me?”
“It’s what you deserve,” he said. “This witness saw you do it and he was more than happy to sail to London and point you out. Once he does, there will be no going back.”
Dread pulled at her heart. Who was this witness? Why was this happening to her?