by Skye Taylor
“They’ll be back before my leave is up. This cruise was planned before Gran died. Mum and Dad had no idea I’d be home when they booked it, and there’s no way to get their money back. I told them to go. They needed the break after the last few weeks. Besides—” He leaned over and cupped her face with his free hand. “That leaves more time for you.” He touched her lips with his own, a brief teasing kiss. He trailed more kisses along her jaw to her ear, then returned to her mouth. She slid her tongue over his lower lip.
With a groan, Philip let go of her face to draw her up against him as the kiss turned passionate. Here on the beach, in the middle of the afternoon, he would quickly come to his senses, but until that happened—
She wound her foot behind his calf and pressed herself against his lean length. The awareness that he was aroused thrilled her. She arched into him to let him know she shared his desire. Their tongues tangled and waves of delicious sensation rolled over her, drowning out everything but Philip and the way he made her feel.
It was as if the last three weeks had been a carefully choreographed dance leading to this moment of physical awareness. To this moment of wanting each other with such fierce passion that their mutual desire could no longer be ignored. She wanted Philip more than she had ever wanted anything. He evoked an almost desperate need to make love. To feel him plunge into her and lose himself.
Philip broke off the kiss and pressed his forehead against hers. His breath hissed sharply between his teeth as he eased his body away from hers.
“Whoa, Elena! This has to stop before I forget where we are. Or who you are.”
“What do you mean, who I am?” She jerked her head away to look him in the eyes. Eyes turned dark with a passion that mirrored her own.
“You’re Andy’s—”
“Don’t say it.” She put her finger over his lips. “Just because my big brother is your best friend, that has nothing to do with us. Or what we want.”
“You have no idea what I want.”
She snorted. “What? You think I’m a virgin? I’ve been with a man before.”
His brow furrowed.
“I know exactly what you want, and I want it, too.”
She tugged his face back toward hers and pressed her mouth to his, lingering just long enough to make her point. “I want you to make love to me.”
For a very long moment, their eyes locked. So much said without words. Perhaps this would be the moment to tell him she loved him. Or perhaps not. She didn’t want him to feel trapped or run for the nearest exit. But if they didn’t end up in bed before this day was over, the desire scorching her insides was going to drive her crazy.
He gathered her back into his arms, but without the urgent passion of a few moments before. “Maybe it’s a good thing my folks are out of town then.”
Chapter 11
February 2015
Camp Lejeune, North Carolina
PHILIP WOKE gasping and hard. The dream seemed so real. The sting of a sunburn on his back felt real. Even her heels digging into his calves as she pressed herself against the throbbing erection he couldn’t hide felt real.
He looked down at his briefs. The erection had been real. Elena and everything else had been in his dream. He sat up in the darkened room and waited for his breathing to return to normal and his boner to go away.
But he couldn’t banish the wispy fragments of his dream or the memory of Elena and the way she’d behaved that wild, abandoned summer when he’d lost his heart to her. He’d tried so hard in spite of his growing feelings for her to keep their time together chaste. She’d been so young. Too young to tie herself down to a Marine who was away more than he was home. Too young to know who she was or what she wanted out of life, and he’d learned the hard way how easily time and distance can change everything.
He’d admired and enjoyed her bold, uninhibited enthusiasm for life. Her bold announcement that she wasn’t a virgin had surprised the hell out of him. That she hadn’t been shy about telling him she wanted to sleep with him had surprised him even more.
All his good intentions had been tossed to the wind then. If his parents hadn’t been away, leaving him in sole possession of the house and all that privacy and opportunity, maybe he’d have been able to resist the temptation despite her open invitation. But likely not. He’d been young and healthy and horny as hell. It had been a long time since he’d been with any woman. And he’d been in love.
He still was.
The realization left him breathless and a little panicky.
He’d fallen just as fast this time as he had then. All the anger and resentment he’d ginned up, reminding himself that she’d broken his heart the last time, had not made any difference. Half the time he’d spent with her, she’d been inflicting pain on him. But even that hadn’t stopped the fall.
Thoughts of her followed him into work every day and home every night. Far too often, he’d found his finger poised over her cell number. So far, he hadn’t given in to the desire to hear her voice. Not since that first night when he’d had to change his appointment time. But he wanted to. She hadn’t loved him then and she didn’t love him now.
But she’d taken over his dreams anyway. He pressed his palm against himself, willing the erection to subside. At least when he was dreaming of her, he was not having nightmares of things he’d seen and done downrange. Which brand of torment was worse, was a tossup. Clawing his way to consciousness in a cold sweat of terror or waking with an aching woody?
He got to his feet and headed for the bathroom. By the time he finally managed to empty his bladder and shake off the remnants of the dream, it was clear sleep would not return any time soon. He sat down at his desk and woke up his laptop. Might as well study up on the latest stuff they wanted him to know for the intelligence gig. But instead of opening the relevant file, he clicked on his browser and typed in Eli Tischler. Elena had mentioned that he was a tenured professor and published author. A moment later, the man’s website popped up.
Eli was a good-looking guy. His longish hair was wavy with golden highlights and his pale blue eyes were striking. Easy to see what had attracted Elena in the first place. His bio made him sound even more interesting. He loved to surf—explained the sun-streaked hair. He mountain-biked and hiked and enjoyed fast cars. Just the sort of guy who would appeal to a young woman beginning the adventure of life and eager to grab it with both hands.
Philip swallowed the bitter pill of jealousy. This man had known Elena intimately. He had shared her life for more than a decade. He had a daughter and everything else Elena could give him. Everything Philip had wanted for himself and had not dared to ask for.
He closed the browser window and slammed the laptop shut. Then he got up and paced his small space. Violent emotions he was not used to dealing with surged in his veins. Jealously. Longing. Regret. And anger.
Eli had been married to a wonderful, passionate woman, but in spite of that, he’d violated his marriage vows. He’d taken her for granted instead of treating her like she deserved. She might claim her heart wasn’t broken, but how could it not be? That kind of betrayal would hurt anyone. Philip had lost count of the men he’d sat with and comforted when they finally broke down and cried after absorbing the truth of their wives’ infidelity.
He ground his teeth to keep from punching something. It was a good thing Eli lived on the west coast. Abandoning any hope of regaining the use of his right hand would have been worth it if he could have used it to smash Eli’s teeth down his throat.
It began to make sense that Elena had not remarried. She probably didn’t trust any man now.
If she’d waited for him, he would have treated her better. She would have been his princess. The love of his life. She could have kept her trust and her willingness to love with all her heart.
But she hadn’t, and there was no way they c
ould pick up where they’d left off fourteen years ago. The only thing left was friendship. Elena had extended the first olive branch when she suggested a cup of coffee. Surely he was man enough to respond.
He returned to his bed and pulled the little canvas bag from its cubby. He thrust his hand inside and felt around until his fingers found the unmistakable contours of his battered silver cross. He drew it out and sat for a long time rubbing his thumb over the scratched surface.
With a sudden swelling in his chest, he removed his dog tags and fumbled to unhook the beaded clasp. He fingered the cross one last time. Then he threaded the chain through the loop on the cross, clipped the chain together again, and put it over his head.
“THESE JUST GOT delivered for you.” Terry set a mint-green vase filled with striking blue roses on the counter. She wore a knowing grin. “I thought you said he was just an old friend.”
Elena looked at the roses, then back to her friend. “He who?”
“Ah, c’mon. That good-looking hunk who was waiting for you the other night. The wounded hero. Remember now?” Terry plopped down on the stool next to Elena and plucked the tiny envelope from the bouquet and held it out. “Aren’t you going to read it?”
“Why would Gunny send me roses?” Elena’s heart flip-flopped while her chest tightened.
“Well, they aren’t red, but it’s Valentine’s day would be my guess. I’ll open it if you won’t.” Terry plucked at the tucked flap of the envelope.
Elena snatched it and clutched it against her chest.
“Okay.” Terry got to her feet. “Have it your way, but if you think I’m going to let this go, you are so wrong.”
Rob Cullen, the head of the physical therapy department, came through the door, thumbing his way through something on his phone.
“Hey, Rob. Look what Elena got. She hasn’t even been here a month and already she’s got herself an admirer.” Terry smirked at Elena and disappeared out the door.
“Anyone I know?” Rob asked as he glanced at the uncommon display of blue roses.
“I don’t know. Maybe. I—”
“You mean you have that many guys lined up already that you haven’t figured out which one sent the roses? Or you don’t know if I know him?” Rob shoved his phone into his pocket.
Unable to meet his gaze, Elena glanced at the flowers. If it was Philip who sent the flowers, he was a patient and that would be a problem. She wasn’t supposed to have that kind of relationship with a patient and Rob would censure her for it.
“He’s an old friend. At least, that’s who I think sent them.”
Rob raised his brows. “You aren’t going to look at the card?”
“Later. I’ve got these charts to finish.” Elena shoved the card into her pocket and opened a file.
Rob stood watching her with a frown marring his brow, then shrugged and moved to his desk in the corner.
She turned to her notes, but her gaze kept straying back to the pretty sapphire blooms. Why would Philip send her roses for Valentine’s Day? He wasn’t her valentine. He’d never been her valentine. They’d been together for a mere twenty-eight days. Not even a whole month. Fourteen years ago.
Four of the most incredible weeks of my life. Her heart contracted and she had to press her lips tight to keep them from trembling at what she’d once thought she had and lost.
I didn’t lose it. I never really had it. I wanted him to be in love with me. I wanted to believe that he couldn’t possibly make love to me like that if he didn’t feel about me the way I felt about him. But I didn’t lose anything.
Elena took a deep breath, then forced her mind back to the work in front of her.
A half hour later, her cell phone vibrated. She pulled it out and checked the screen.
“Philip?” She glanced behind her to see if her boss was still at his desk. Thankfully, he’d gone.
“Did you like them?”
“They’re beautiful,” she answered cautiously. “But why?”
“Because it’s your birthday.”
Her breath caught in her throat. How did he remember my birthday? We never got to celebrate it together.
“I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday. I hope I wasn’t out of line.” His voice held a trace of doubt.
“No, I—I mean—I love them, and it was really sweet of you to remember.”
Elena didn’t know what else to say, so she stopped talking. Apparently, Philip was at an equal loss because all she could hear for several taut moments was the sound of his breathing.
“Well . . . ,” he finally said. “Captain Clueless is looking for me, so I’ve got to get back to work. Have a nice weekend.”
“You, too.” Elena held the phone to her ear several moments longer before it beeped, signaling the line had been disconnected.
She drew the vase of roses closer and sniffed the heady fragrance of the unusual azure-colored blooms. Did Philip know that blue roses did not grow naturally and symbolized the unattainable?
She touched a satin-smooth petal. Blue roses also meant I can’t stop thinking about you. How appropriate. She hadn’t stopped thinking about him since the day he’d showed up for his first appointment. In truth, she hadn’t really stopped thinking about him for fourteen years.
She pulled the forgotten envelope from her pocket and slipped the card out.
Happy Birthday to the loveliest woman I’ve ever known.
Chapter 12
August 2001
Tide’s Way, North Carolina
PHILIP LEANED ON the railing of his parent’s deck, staring out at the big waves rolling in and breaking on the beach below.
It was meant to be, Philip. Elena’s words after a soul-melting kiss that left him breathless and thoroughly aroused just before she flitted upstairs to take a shower. Without her intoxicating presence scrambling his brain, he was questioning the wisdom of starting something he wouldn’t be able to finish. Their time together would come to a frustrating halt in just over a week, and he wouldn’t see her again until Christmas.
What am I doing? She’s just a kid. This is a bad idea.
She was nineteen. He was almost twenty-nine. Ten years older and far more experienced. Even if she wasn’t a virgin, she could hardly know what or who she wanted for herself.
He’d like nothing better than to leave her with a wedding band on her finger and a baby in her belly. But that wasn’t fair to her. She needed to finish college. Even an engagement ring would be asking too much.
Until today, he’d kept a tight rein on his desire to possess her physically, but she’d blasted through his restraint. Her free-spirited enthusiasm and honest acceptance of the sizzle that they both felt had been the final straw. Wise or not, he was going to make love to her and satisfy them both.
A week to pack in enough lovemaking to last for the rest of his deployment wasn’t nearly long enough, but it was all he had. When he got back to the states, if she still felt the same way she did now, then he’d get a ring and get down on one knee to pledge himself to her forever. But for now . . .
For now, he was going to do his best to stop agonizing about being smart and just enjoy what they had going.
“I thought I’d find you out here.”
Startled because he hadn’t heard her coming, Philip whipped around to see Elena halfway across the deck. She wore one of his dress shirts buttoned just enough to leave plenty to the imagination. He was instantly hard and, considering the saucy grin on her face, she knew it.
She had a beer in each hand and held one out to him.
“You’re not old enough for this.” He took both bottles from her and set them on the railing. “Besides, I want you sober and very sure about what you’re doing.”
She placed a hand on his bare chest and slowly trailed her fingers down over h
is abs to his waistband. His stomach quivered under her touch and his groin throbbed.
“I’m very sure,” she said, lightly touching the tip of his erection through the fabric of his shorts. “But—”
“But?” His heart hammered in his chest and blood pounded through his body as her knuckles skimmed down the length of him.
“I’m not on the pill. I hope you have protection.” She smelled like his shampoo and his Irish Spring soap, but somehow, the combination on her aroused the hell out of him.
“I have protection,” he gasped as her hand closed completely around the bulge in his shorts.
“On you?” She peered up at him with her brows lifted and a sultry look in her dark eyes. She took her hand away from his pants and walked her fingers up his chest.
He reached into his pocket and brought out the little box. Then he shoved it back into his pocket, feeling suddenly embarrassed. He was glad she was responsible, but it still felt awkward. Like she was the experienced one and he was just a kid eager for his first lay.
“I see you found something to wear to bed.” He sucked in another tormented breath.
“Oh, I have no intention of wearing it to bed.” She chuckled naughtily. “But I didn’t think you’d approve of me seducing you on your parent’s deck wearing nothing at all.” She stretched up onto her toes and snaked her arms about his neck.
She was not wearing a bra. That was for damned sure. Her breasts were soft and pert and her nipples were hard little pebbles teasing his bare flesh. He skimmed his hands down her back to her butt and pressed her firmly against his aching dick. She wasn’t wearing panties either. She was definitely doing the seducing, but he wasn’t fighting very hard. If he wasn’t careful, it would be over before they really got started, and he wanted to make it last. He wanted their first time to be her best ever.
Elena pulled his face down to hers and, a moment later, he wasn’t sure he could be careful. “Elena,” he gasped. “Slow down. We’ve got all night.”