Another silence falls as I debate whether I should tell him what's in my head. “I saw her. My ma. I saw her on my enlightenment journey. Well, she was more like a figment of my imagination, I reckon. Or that damned Ayhaya. But meetin' her felt so real. She looked a lot like me. Is that true? Did she really look like me?”
His soft chuckle gets swallowed up by the night. “Very much so. Every time I look at you, I see her.”
I grin at him in the dark. “Good thing I got her looks then and not yours, huh?”
His laughter elicits my own. “A very good thing. You are like her in so many ways and not just appearance. You both have that stubborn streak, and determination, and willfulness. And you definitely inherited her sharp tongue. And her wit. She made me laugh so much. I loved that about her.”
His words make my catch my breath. “You really did love her?”
“With every bit of my heart and soul. She saved my life.”
His words are so raw, so full of emotion I know he ain't lying. I wanted to ask him this for a long time, but just never had the gumption. Maybe the cover of darkness bolsters my courage, but I ask more. I need to hear more. “Did she love you back?”
At first, I don't think he's gonna answer me. He tilts his head to the night sky and studies the stars, like I had done earlier. But finally, he speaks. “I believe so, yes. Not at the beginning. She was my prisoner. My lab subject to experiment on. Because of her and her kind, I was able to create my own form of New Blood, which I believe was the deciding factor in helping the Prezedant win his war. She harbored nothing but hatred for me for that, and who could blame her? But as time went on, I realized the injustice of my ways, and I no longer wanted a part of that life. Meeting your mother, loving her, changed me for the better. And after I learned of your existence, I knew there was no other choice. I helped her escaped. I knew there wasn’t anything I wouldn’t do to keep you both safe.”
He pauses, lost in his own memories. “Her escape was successful, but mine was not. The Prezedant beat me within an inch of my life, left me for dead tied to a pole in the sand lands, along with my allies, as scorpi-ant food and a reminder to anyone else not to cross him. After all, if he could do that to his second in command, no one was safe. But your mother came back for me. She saved me and brought me to the mountains. She nursed me back to health and protected me. Even learned to love me, I like to believe. And after you came along, we were a family, the three of us, if only for a short time. But it was the happiest time of my life.”
I stare at him through the gloom. My ma did all that for him? And we lived as a family? Why didn't I know this? Why hadn't he told me this earlier?
“What happened then? Why did I end up in the sand lands after my ma's death? Why didn't you keep me with you?” I hate the whining and desperation in my voice, but I cain't help it. This has haunted me for as long as I can remember, and I need to know.
He finally turns to face me then; his gray eyes stare intently into mine. “It wasn't my choice, Tara. I wanted nothing more than to protect you, to keep you with me. I risked everything to save you both. I failed her, but I managed to get you out. You were all I had left of your mother, and I wanted nothing more than to keep you by my side. But you needed to be kept safe, and I couldn’t do that. I couldn’t do it for your mother, and I wasn’t about to risk it with you. You needed to be far away from here, and from me, so he would never find you. I handed you over to Lily and refused to even let her mention where she was taking you. I didn’t dare know. I couldn’t trust myself that I wouldn’t come after you. Letting you go was the hardest thing I'd ever had to do, but do it I did because… because I loved you.”
His wrinkly hand reaches out and caresses my cheek, and I don't pull away. “I am so proud of you and what you've become. And I know you will be the one to end this. You are strong enough and brave enough and smart enough. You are Rease's daughter, one hundred percent. We are heading into war, and no one can predict the outcome of any of our futures. I most likely will not make it out alive. And I'm okay with that. I've had more than my share of years. I'm tired, Tara, and I'm ready to face my gods, but before that happens, I need you to know how I feel. I'm your pa. I have always, and will always, love my baby girl. And I would do anything for you.”
He stands with a creak of bones, not waiting for my response. I reckon he's as scared as I am as to what's gonna come outta my mouth. But I cain't say anything even if I wanted to, my throat is so clogged up with tears. His hand moves to the top of my head and pats it like he's speaking to some young'un. “Now, go get some rest. It's late.”
And as I watch him shuffle away into the dark, only then do I allow the tears to fall. I wallow in my grief and self-pity. Crying for everything that coulda been. For the family I shoulda had, but that the Prezedant took from me. Just like he’d done with my Rivercross family. The sobs rack my body, and I bite my knuckle trying to keep my grief inside. Finally, the crying ebbs away, and I wipe my cheeks as another thought replaces the sorrow. The plan that’s been hovering at the back of my mind pushes its way to the front and clarification sets in. I need help for me to see this plan through, and my pa is the perfect one to do it.
17
The Surprise
“Hurry up, Tara. Geez, you walk like an old lady.” Finn glares back at me from over his shoulder, and I snort at his perturbed expression. Something sure has got the boy riled up today. And why the hell does he have me out here hikin' through the hills?
“I'm comin' as fast as I can,” I yell after him. “Slow down. You're gonna bust an ankle or leg if you keep hurryin' like that. And what's so important you gotta drag me out here in the middle of nowhere? We gotta get the supplies all packed and everythin' ready to go. Mack's gonna be real pissed once he realizes we're shirkin' our work.”
“Mack, shmack,” he throws back at me, and I raise a brow in surprise. “What's he gonna do if he cain't find us? Get so mad he's gonna pop an eyeball? Oh, wait...”
The comment is so out of line and so unexpected that once I get over the initial shock, I start laughing. And I keep laughing. I cain't seem to stop. I laugh so hard my stomach cramps, and I bend over against one of the boulders for support.
I really ain't got no reason to be laughing. We leave for Skytown tomorrow. Every one of us is a bundle of nerves right now, wondering what's gonna happen to us all. Every single person in the mountain village is walking on eggshells, just waiting for the other shoe to drop. I even spent the morning in the company of Ernst, trying to ignore how awkward we were acting after last night's conversation.
But for my crazy idea to work, I needed him. It had taken a lot of work to talk him into it, and the look on his face when I asked him to show me how to draw some of my blood said he thought I was downright crazy. After our heart to heart last night, I now realize he really ain’t the big baddie I make him out to be in my head. I mean, my ma loved him. She must have seen some good in him, and I think I now see it too, which made my lying to him that much harder. But I couldn’t tell him the truth about what I planned to do. Not the whole truth. There’s no way he’d let me carry it through. I think maybe that, combined with the stress of the looming battle, has finally broken me, because here I am laughing like a mad woman. And I cain't stop.
Finn stares at me and shakes his head before hoofing it back my way. He stands looking at me, hands on his hips, probably wondering at what point I busted my noggin'. But then he cain't keep a straight face no more, and a snort escapes his lips. Soon the both of us are giggling so hard even Cat sits up, staring at us like we've lost our minds. She mewls at us in disapproval, but that only causes me and Finn to look back at each other and crack up even more.
“Finn, stop,” I gasp out in between spurts of laughter.
He falls into me, his laughing making him weak. “I cain't,” he groans.
We stand that way, him leaning against me and shrieking our fool heads off, until finally the laughter wanes into sporadic chuckles. I suck in a deep
breath and wipe the tears outta my eyes. Ruffling the red hair at my chin level, I find myself amazed again at how much he's sprouted over the past while. No wonder his pants legs were showing a lot more boot and ankle now.
“Oh, my gods, that was dang funny. But don't ever let Mack hear ya say that, no matter how funny we think it is,” I warn.
His head bobs up and down. “Aye, I ain't that stupid.”
For someone who had been in such a hurry earlier, he seems real content now just to lean against me as we stand in the hills overlooking the lower mountain plains. I throw my arm around his neck and pull him closer.
“It's so peaceful,” Finn says, and I mumble in agreement. “Hard to think you guys are gonna be leavin' tomorrow. I still don't think it’s right that Cat and me ain't goin'.”
“Finn, we've discussed this.”
“I know. And I ain't gonna argue with you again. I know it’s a real important job you've given us, lookin' after Thomas and Jane and Conner. I promised ya I would, and I ain't gonna let ya down.”
“I know you won't,” I say around the lump in my throat. “The villagers that cain't fight are gonna need help with the huntin' and gatherin', so you're gonna be real needed around here until we all get back.”
I feel his head bob again. “Aye, I know that too. It don't make it no easier though, knowin' you're all goin' into battle.”
I lean my cheek against the top of his head. “We'll be fine. I told you already; I have a fail proof plan. And you know how stubborn I am. The Prezedant don't stand a chance.”
I expect him to laugh, but instead he pulls away from me and pins me with a dead serious gaze.
“Promise me somethin', Tara. Promise me you will beat him for good, and that you and everybody else will come home safe and sound.”
I twist him toward me and grab both his thin shoulders in my hands. “I promise you, Finn. I promise that I will destroy him once and for all.” I leave out the part about us all coming back safe and sound, hoping he don't notice. I cain't promise something I know probably won't happen. He searches my face like he's searching for a crack in my lie. Suddenly, he falls at me and wraps his arms around my neck, hanging on for dear life. I let him since I clinch him just as tight, eyes squeezed shut to fight back tears. We rock back and forth, no need for words. Family don’t need words to say how they feel.
A cold slime whips across my cheek, and my eyes snap open to a loathsome blue tongue.
“Ugh! Shizen, Cat. How many times I gotta tell ya to stop doin' that? It's so disgustin'.”
I wipe the back of my sleeve across my cheek as Finn's laugh echoes through the hills.
“She's just tellin' ya how much she's gonna miss ya too,” he says as he scratches her ears with affection.
“Uh-huh. More like how she's still threatenin' to eat me, even after all this time. I swear. She don't lick nobody else like that.”
“Nah, she don't wanna eat you. You're too prickly. You'd upset her belly.”
My eyes open wide at the insult as I fight to keep the laughter from escaping. “Why, you little mule-turd. I oughta smack you silly for that.”
He sticks his tongue out at me as he steps away. “You gotta catch me first, old woman.”
He turns his back to me and sprints away, with me yelling after him, “Finn, stop runnin'. You're gonna bust an ankle.”
He don't take no heed and starts bouncing around the rocks like some mountain cat. I follow along at a more sedate pace, not wanting to run. The items Ernst had given me earlier are still in my pocket, and I don't wanna risk losing ‘em. I can promise Finn until I'm blue in the face that I can do this, but the backup plan in my pocket makes me feel a whole lot better.
He disappears from my sight around a ridge, and a tiny yell hits my ears. I finally increase my pace concerned the little turd has actually busted an ankle just like I warned him. I hurry around the ridge to a most unexpected sight.
In the middle of the rocks and hills sits a tiny body of water, so calm and blue it looks like a piece of the sky simply fell and is just sitting there. A little blue oasis in the craggy mountains. But it ain’t even that sight that catches my eye. It’s the sea of familiar faces, beaming at me as they all shout, “Surprise!”
I pull up short and stare. “What the...?”
Standing behind Finn and Cat is Jax, Belle, and Ben. On the other side of them stands Beanie and Talbert and Tater. Even Jane, Thomas, and Conner are there. All of my kin pretty much. Ain't no sign of Mack or Ernst, but I figured neither one of 'em woulda gone along with this. Whatever this is.
“What the shizen? What are y'all doin' here?”
“What's it look like?” Ben asks as he walks toward me, grinning from ear to ear. “Don't you remember what day this is?”
“What day it is?” I echo, wracking my brain for a clue.
“Geez, Tara, did that white hair affect your brain too?” Finn asks, rolling his eyes. “It's your born day.”
And as if on cue, they all shout, “Happy born day!”
My born day? No, it cain't be. It cain't be a year since all of this happened. A whole year has passed since I lost Grada and Molly and everybody? I meet Ben's gaze with a furrowed brow. “Are you sure?”
He shakes his head like he cain't believe I'm asking that question. “Of course I'm sure. You'd think I'd ever forget your born day?”
My eyes cloud over at his words, and I glance away, but he takes my hand in his and turns my chin back to meet his gaze. “Hey, now, none of that. That time from a year ago is done and past. We got a whole new family now. Don't mean we're gonna forget the old anytime soon, but these people right here?” He jerks his thumb over his shoulder. “These are the ones we gotta worry about now. And love. And eat berry bread with.”
“No!” My mouth drops open in hopeful disbelief. “Please tell me you ain't pullin' my leg? You actually got berry bread for my born day?”
“Aye, I do. Who's the best friend ever, huh?”
“You are,” I exclaim in excitement, but Finn takes mock offense.
“Hey, I thought I was your best friend,” he says, his pouting making him appear all of five born years.
I laugh and step away from Ben, flicking Finn lightly under the chin. “Finn, you little stinkster. How'd you manage to keep this quiet from me?”
“Easy,” Jax says as he ambles my way. “We didn't tell him until the very last minute, so he didn't have time to spill the beans. All he had to do was get you here. Happy born day, Tara.” I think all he's gonna do is hug me, and I tense slightly, but then he does the unexpected. He dips his head, and his lips meet mine in the lightest of touches. But it's enough to turn me flame red and have my heart hammering into overdrive. I expect to hear the laughter and catcalls, but instead I find myself on the receiving end of more hugs and kisses as my kin surround me.
The show of affection is almost overwhelming and fills my heart to overflowing. I ain't felt this content and at peace in a very long time, and I suddenly understand Ben is right. The past is the past. Don't mean we'll ever forget it, but it's gone, and these few here in fronta me? They’re the ones I gotta protect now.
I blink to keep the tears away, and it ain't the first time I ask myself what the gods is happening to me. I've become a real cry baby lately. But at this moment in time, I really don't care.
“Thanks everybody. I… I don't know what to say. Y'all are the best, and I cain't ask for anything better, unless it's berry bread. Will someone please bring me some berry bread?”
The laughter that follows eases my embarrassment, and I take Jax's offered arm as he leads me to the little mountain of food piled up by the lake.
“Another picnic, Jax?” I question, and Ben pokes his head in between us.
“Another one? When did you guys have the first?”
“Never mind. Where you get all this?” I say, diverting his attention.
“Where do you think?” He points to Tater, and the half man drops a little bow.
�
�Tater, the trader, at your service. It took a lot of bartering and palavering on my part. The residents of this mountain village are more along the lines of the tight-fisted variety. But find a supplier of berries, I did. Then came the acquisition of the cornmeal. Then finding the right someone with enough skill in the culinary arts to produce this fine baked good. I traded some of the bread for the choc-o-let. I traded my other... skills for the sweet biscuits. And then—”
“Thank you, Tater,” I interrupt as I drop a quick kiss on his cheek. “You are amazin'.”
He smiles and puffs out his chest at my thanks, and turns his head to survey his work. He don't see Belle mouth, “thank you,” at me or Jax's thumbs up. Finn snorts in laughter, but I shake my head at him in stern warning. No sense in hurtin' Tater's feelings.
“We have something for ya too, Tara.” Jane smiles at me as she and Thomas near and hand me a small cloth bag. I take it with excitement, but I'm happier about the brightness in their eyes and the look of contentment on their faces. They don't look like the frightened little mice Tater had rescued weeks ago. They look like the old Jane and Thomas I once knew, and just for a moment, it seems like nuthin' bad had ever happened to us at all. It's real nice to forget, even if it's just for a bit.
I turn the bag upside down, and a beautiful rope bracelet falls into my open palm. Its intricate woven design is decorated with tiny black and white beads.
“It's beautiful,” I breathe as I study it closer. “Did you guys make this?”
She nods, beaming at my praise. “Me and Thomas. Talbert and Beanie got us the beads, so they helped too.”
I look over at my two bodyguards. Beanie is nodding up and down so hard it looks like his head is on a hinge. “Yup, me and Talbert lifted 'em—” Talbert elbows him hard in the ribs. “I mean bartered 'em offa the raider girl that was here. Yeah, that's what I mean.”
I narrow my eyes at 'em both, and they shuffle their feet under my gaze, but I don't say nuthin'. I don't wanna ruin the young'uns gift to me, but they both know they're gonna hear about this later.
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