by Cary McNeal
“A Brief History of Actual Exploding Animals,” WebEcoist, September 5, 2008, www.webecoist.com.
* * *
957
FACT : Blood in stool or diarrhea can be a sign of necrotizing enterocolitis, a condition which causes the lining of the intestinal wall to die allowing tissue to fall off. The disease has a death rate of almost 25 percent. Because diarrhea wasn’t fun enough already.
Jenifer K. Lehrer, “Necrotizing Enterocolitis,” Medical Encyclopedia, Medline Plus, U.S. National Library of Medicine and National Institutes of Health, May 3, 2007, www.nlm.nih.gov.
* * *
958
FACT : Two minutes after lethal injection drugs were administered to Raymond Landry during his 1988 execution in Texas, the syringe ejected from his vein, causing deadly chemicals to spray across the room toward witnesses. Ray wasn’t around to see it, unfortunately, and missed all the excitement.
Russ Kick, Disinformation Book of Lists: Subversive Facts and Hidden Information in Rapid-fire Format (The Disinformation Company, 2004).
* * *
959
FACT : The Amazon’s Uape Indians mix their recently cremated relatives’ ashes with alcohol to be imbibed by all members of the family as they share fond memories of the deceased. “Who wants another shot of Grandma?”
eBizarre, www.ebizarre.com.
* * *
960
FACT : In one case involving the lethal use of a Taser, a doctor suffered an epileptic seizure after crashing his car, and was repeatedly shocked when he failed to comply with an officer’s commands. The seizure was to blame for his lack of response, and the Taser shocks resulted in death. Not the cop’s fault.
He kept asking the doc if he wanted another jolt, and the doc kept nodding his head yes.
“Tasers—Potentially Lethal and Easy to Abuse,” Amnesty International report, December 16, 2008, www.amnesty.org.
* * *
961
FACT : There are four sunken nuclear submarines at the bottom of the Atlantic Ocean. One, located near Bermuda, holds sixteen live nuclear warheads. No wonder Bermuda’s a little uptight.
Legends of America, www.legendsofamerica.com.
* * *
962
FACT : Records show that money lenders in 1124 had their hands and testicles cut off by order of Henry I. And you thought 2008 was a bad year for banks.
Jean Kellaway, The History of Torture and Execution: From Early Civilization through Medieval Times to the Present (Globe Pequot, 2003).
* * *
963
FACT : In 1581, writer John Stubs was convicted of sedition for insulting Queen Elizabeth and sentenced to public mutilation, where his right hand was chopped off and the wound cauterized with a hot iron. His right arm became known as Stubs’ stub.
Jean Kellaway, The History of Torture and Execution: From Early Civilization through Medieval Times to the Present (Globe Pequot, 2003),
* * *
964
FACT : In 1535, French Huguenot Antoine Poile had his tongue pierced and attached to his cheek before being burnt alive. People pay good money for that now.
Piercing, that is. Not the burning alive part.
Jean Kellaway, The History of Torture and Execution: From Early Civilization through Medieval Times to the Present (Globe Pequot, 2003).
* * *
965
FACT : In Russia during the time of Ivan the Terrible, it was customary for captured highwaymen to have their heels cut off or crushed and be dragged along by their injured ankles. Okay, but why did they call him Ivan the Terrible?
Jean Kellaway, The History of Torture and Execution: From Early Civilization through Medieval Times to the Present (Globe Pequot, 2003).
* * *
966
FACT : In sixteenth to nineteenth century England and Scotland, women deemed “troublesome and angry” could be subjected to the “scold’s bridle,” a metal helmet with a gagging strap that prevented them from speaking. And . . . ?
Jean Kellaway, The History of Torture and Execution: From Early Civilization through Medieval Times to the Present (Globe Pequot, 2003).
* * *
967
FACT : In medieval England, women were punished with the ducking stool, a dangling seat on a rope used to drop them into water. The shock of the cold water and the length of the ducking were often enough to kill. The good news is that the ducking baptized them as well, so they all went to heaven when they drowned.
Jean Kellaway, The History of Torture and Execution: From Early Civilization through Medieval Times to the Present (Globe Pequot, 2003).
* * *
968
FACT : The Iron Maiden was an upright coffin with interior spikes used in medieval torture. The victim was forced inside and, as the door was closed, had his lungs and eyes pierced by the spikes. But the prongs were too short to kill instantly, so the prisoner lingered in agony for hours before expiring. The device is no longer used; now we have the music of Iron Maiden to torture us instead.
Jean Kellaway, The History of Torture and Execution: From Early Civilization through Medieval Times to the Present (Globe Pequot, 2003).
* * *
969
FACT : During six centuries of church-sanctioned witch hunts, an estimated 100,000 people died from torture and being burned at the stake. That number is probably high, though, so it’s not as bad as it sounds.
Jean Kellaway, The History of Torture and Execution: From Early Civilization through Medieval Times to the Present (Globe Pequot, 2003).
* * *
970
FACT : As many as 900 people died during witch hunts in the Lorraine region of France from 1580 to 1595. Some villages cleared of “witches” were left with just a single female resident. And she probably liked it. Women can be very competitive.
Jean Kellaway, The History of Torture and Execution: From Early Civilization through Medieval Times to the Present (Globe Pequot, 2003).
* * *
971
FACT : Pressing to death was a form of torture used in fifteenth century England in which the offender was laid naked with a board across his torso. Iron weights were then piled on the board each day, until the pressure was excruciating and often fatal. I’d take my sandwich and say, “Hey, mind if I stick this in there?” Love those pressed sandwiches.
Jean Kellaway, The History of Torture and Execution: From Early Civilization through Medieval Times to the Present (Globe Pequot, 2003).
* * *
972
FACT : Just while making the bed, the average person traverses four miles in a year. That’s one huge bed.
eBizarre, www.ebizarre.com.
* * *
973
FACT : Two thousand years ago, the condemned in the Moche civilization in Peru suffered shockingly brutal execution methods, including being skinned alive, decapitated, drained of blood, or bound tightly and picked to death by vultures. That’s harsh, all right, but I give them points for creativity.
Jean Kellaway, The History of Torture and Execution: From Early Civilization through Medieval Times to the Present (Globe Pequot, 2003).
* * *
974
FACT : Being unmarried can shorten a man’s life by ten years. Being married can shorten it by a lot more.
eBizarre, www.ebizarre.com.
* * *
975
FACT : The pillory was a common punishment in colonial America and eighteenth century England and France. Similar to stocks, the pillory held offenders in place as onlookers pummeled them with rocks, garbage, food, feces, dead animals, and more, sometimes to death. In 1756, four Englishmen died after just one hour in the pillory. That would be fun, actually. To throw stuff, I mean. Not to be in the pillory.
Jean Kellaway, The History of Torture and Execution: From Early Civilization through Medieval Times to the Present (Globe Pequot, 2003).
* * *
976
; FACT : In Los Angeles, California in 1970, authorities discovered “Genie,” a feral child who had spent ten years locked alone in a room by her abusive father. At thirteen, Genie could barely walk and talk, was not toilet-trained, could not chew solid food, and could not focus her eyes further than twelve feet. Genie’s dad—now there’s a guy who needs to be pilloried. I’d bring baseballs and bricks.
“Genie: A Modern-Day Wild Child,” in Learning About Learning, Great Explorations in Math and Science series from the Lawrence Hall of Science, (The Regents of the University of California), FeralChildren.com, www.feralchildren.com.
* * *
977
FACT : Ingested cocaine may lead to severe bowel gangrene caused by reduced blood flow. Gangrene is defined as “necrosis or death of soft tissue . . . usually followed by decomposition and putrefaction,” so the bowels are the ideal place for it.
“Cocaine,” Psychology Today, www.psychologytoday.com.
“Cocaine,” Dictionary.com, www.dictionary.reference.com.
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978
FACT : A five-year-old English girl nearly died in early 2009 after she had swallowed so much of her own hair that it became a rope-like structure that wrapped around her organs—a condition known as Rapunzel Syndrome. “Hair today, gone tomorrow.”
Luke Salkeld and Alison Smith Squire, “The Real-Life Rapunzel: The Moral of Millie’s Grim Tale Is, Don’t Chew Your Hair,” Daily Mail, May 23, 2009, www.dailymail.co.uk.
* * *
979
FACT : A 2009 study revealed that young male children of busy or neglectful parents can feel more closely bonded to characters from the television shows they watch, like Bob the Builder, than their fathers. Just another reason not to let your kids watch Barney.
“Boys Develop Closer Bonds with Bob the Builder Than with Parents,” Daily Mail, May 25, 2009, www.telegraph.co.uk.
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980
FACT : Employees at a New York City game store wound up trapped inside for hours when thousands of bees swarmed around the entrance in 2009. There was a lot of buzz about a new game that had just arrived.
Associated Press, “Buzz Off! Bee Swarm Traps Workers in NY Game Store,” May 23, 2009, www.newsvine.com.
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981
FACT : “Jigsaw Kid” is the nickname of a six-year-old UK girl born with two left lungs, five spleens, a diseased liver, a hole in her heart, and her stomach on the wrong side. Most of her organs face front-to-back, and when her heart pumps rapidly, you can see it beating through her back. On the bright side, I’m sure she loves being called “Jigsaw Kid.” Children aren’t sensitive to that sort of thing at all.
“‘Jigsaw Kid’ Lives with Jumbled Up Internal Organs,” Daily Mail, May 22, 2009, www.telegraph.co.uk.
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982
FACT : In 2009, doctors in Izhevsk, Russia found a branch from a fir tree germinated inside the lungs of a man suffering from seizures and coughing up blood. I say leave it in there, let it grow. He could save some money at the holidays and be his own Christmas tree.
“Fir Tree Grows Inside Man’s Lungs,” Pravda.Ru, April 15, 2009, www.bizarrenews.org.
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983
FACT : One percent of the entire population in Greenland reside in one apartment building called Blok P. Luckily, Greenland’s population is only like, 100 people, so Blok P is really just a one-bedroom flat.
eBizarre, www.ebizarre.com.
* * *
984
FACT : In 2009, a Black Angus calf was born in Colorado with seven legs, two spines, and two hooves on one leg. The calf only survived for ten minutes. I hope they ate it. That’s a lot of veal.
“Calf In Colorado Born With 7 Legs, 2 Spines,” Steamboat Pilot & Today, May 23, 2009, www.kirotv.com.
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985
FACT : A Wyoming man saved his dog’s life in 2009 when he sucked venom from a rattlesnake bite out his dog’s nose. The man required four vials of antivenin—at $3,500 a pop. Know what would suck?
If the dog got hit by a car the next day and died. I bet that guy would be pissed, not about the money so much as the mouthful of dog snot.
“Man Saves Dog By Sucking Venom From Nose,” Casper Star-Tribune, May 22, 2009, www.trib.com.
* * *
986
FACT : The Vatican started a Facebook page in 2009, gathering 45,000 contacts and 500,000 page views within days of launch. The “How Well Do You Know Saint Eusebius of Vercelli?” quiz is a big hit.
Ariel David, “Vatican Launches Facebook Application,” kirotv.com, May 22, 2009, www.kirotv.com.
* * *
987
FACT : A twenty-three-year-old New Zealand mother lost 88 pounds and suffered a heart attack after drinking nothing but Red Bull—from ten to fourteen cans a day—for eight months. Her friends call her “The Great Cornholio,” after the beloved Beavis & Butt-Head character.
“Traces of Cocaine Found in Red Bull Cola,” NEWS.com.au, May 26, 2009, www.news.com.au.
* * *
988
FACT : A 2009 study by a leading fossil expert suggests that modern humans hunted and ate Neanderthals, a sturdy species that mysteriously disappeared 30,000 years ago as modern humans migrated to Europe. We preferred to eat wild buffalo back then, but Neanderthals were slower.
Robin McKie, “How Neanderthals Met a Grisly Fate: Devoured by Humans,” The Observer, May 17, 2009, www.guardian.co.uk.
* * *
989
FACT : Protein is rare in some parts of Kenya, so natives drink cow’s blood for nourishment instead. I think I’d rather eat a Neanderthal.
Arkady Leokum and K. R. Hobbie, The Little Giant Book of Weird & Wacky Facts (Sterling Publishing Company, 2005).
* * *
990
FACT : The world’s largest mammal, the blue whale, also has the largest penis in the animal kingdom, measuring about ten feet long and a foot in diameter. I bet it works like a rudder. They can steer with it.
Shane Mooney, Useless Sexual Trivia: Tastefully Prurient Facts about Everyone’s Favorite Subject (Simon & Schuster, 2000).
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991
FACT : “Dork” is the proper term for whale penis, hence the derogatory term. Calling someone “whale dick” just doesn’t have the same ring to it.
Shane Mooney, Useless Sexual Trivia: Tastefully Prurient Facts about Everyone’s Favorite Subject (Simon & Schuster, 2000).
* * *
992
FACT : Medorthophobia is the fear of an erect penis. Must be a female thing, because guys are only afraid of the opposite problem.
Shane Mooney, Useless Sexual Trivia: Tastefully Prurient Facts about Everyone’s Favorite Subject (Simon & Schuster, 2000).
* * *
993
FACT : Capuchin monkeys often greet each other by showing off their erections.
My dog does the same thing, but you have to pet him first.
Shane Mooney, Useless Sexual Trivia: Tastefully Prurient Facts about Everyone’s Favorite Subject (Simon & Schuster, 2000).
* * *
994
FACT : In the fifth century, castration was believed to cure the plague. It worked, too. The disease disappeared among men virtually overnight.
Shane Mooney, Useless Sexual Trivia: Tastefully Prurient Facts about Everyone’s Favorite Subject (Simon & Schuster, 2000).