He gave it to her. Rapidly, he brought her over the brim.
Her back arched as she came, cries erupting through her throat. Immediately he lowered his hips between her thighs, found the moistness of her, and plunged within.
Alenna took him within her with a sense of destiny. As if she had always known, from the very first time she’d seen him, that they would be together. She abandoned all coherent thought as he began to move on her. With slow thrusts he took her, and she could feel him trembling as he held her, as he delved with agonizing slowness.
With every movement of his body, his control thrilled her in a part of her she’d never known existed. Once again she wanted him to lose restraint and show her the most animal, the most passionate side of him.
Determined this time would last, he kept his thrusts slow and deep, pressing inside her with a rhythm that surged in his heart and along his veins. She arched against him, taking his mouth in a deep kiss. She dictated the kiss, pushing her tongue into his mouth. Exploring, she moaned in satisfaction when he made a deep sound of pleasure and slightly increased the tempo of his thrusts.
He found one nipple, teasing it with flicks of his tongue, and she arched against him again, whispering his name softly. As he watched her he thought it was the most erotic thing he’d ever seen. Her face flushed, her lips parted as her breath came swift. Her excitement escalating with each lash of his tongue and movement of his body. Although the pleasure threatened to erupt from him, he kept his thoughts steady on giving her pleasure, making her cry out in ecstasy. He suckled her nipples, nibbled and licked ceaselessly.
Every gasp, every writhing twist of her hips made Tynan shudder with pleasure, and he slowed. She pushed up against him.
"Tynan," she gasped.
He knew her agony, but he wouldn’t relent. He wanted Alenna to know his touch, his love making, as she’d known nothing else. No other man would ever be able to erase the feel of him within her.
As his breath came heavy and fast, she knew he wanted her to challenge him. To show him her thoughts could never be for anyone but him. God, how could they be for anyone else? She wrapped her legs around his and tilted her hips against him repeatedly. His sounds of pleasure spurred her on, and she gripped his muscled buttocks and urged him to thrust harder and harder. Faster and faster.
With a sense of joy she felt him lose his tightly reigned control. For Tynan the time for waiting was over. He groaned her name, guttural and harsh as he hammered into her, pumping and driving. Frenzied.
Alenna was going to die. There was simply no way she could survive the pleasure. A cry burst from her, coming between a gasp and scream as she felt her contractions tighten and release against his hardness. A river of heat sprang from deep within her and swelled to encompass her entire body. And like a drowning woman she let it take her. With a powerful thrust his entire body stiffened and quaked. A loud, harsh cry burst from his throat as he thrust again, and once more. Then he sank upon her and was still.
* * *
CHAPTER 18
Tynan couldn’t sleep. The sounds of laughing and merrymaking outside had calmed, alerting him that the night grew late.
Alenna lay in his arms, her soft breath stirring the hair on his chest as she nestled close to him in sleep. He brushed a tendril of soft hair back from her face. The sight of the bruise on her forehead stirred fierce, protective feelings, and he brushed her cheek with his fingertips, savoring the softness of her skin.
A sigh parted her lips, and she snuggled against him like a trusting child. Certainly she was not a child, but a grown woman who had shown him powerful passion. With the giving of herself she had set every inch of his body on fire, and had at the same time shown him his weakness.
He couldn’t resist her.
Gently he kissed her forehead. She sighed again and smiled in her sleep. He touched her skin with increasing desire, savoring the softness of her femininity as if this were the last time. Sweeping his fingers along her body, he stroked a rosy nipple. She moaned … a sweet, yearning sound that fueled his desire high.
When Alenna didn’t open her eyes, Tynan leaned down and brushed his tongue around and around the hardened tips of her breasts. She moved in his arms, sighing with pleasure, but still she didn’t open her eyes. He ministered to both nipples, licking and tasting, sucking and nibbling gently with his teeth until she moved against him and her breath came fast. He enjoyed the texture of her hard nipple on his tongue, drowning in the scent and feel and taste of her.
Finally she opened her eyes. The softness he saw in their depths warmed his heart more than he could have imagined. And what he saw there frightened him. Scared him so much he knew he had to hide behind the passion. Had to immerse himself in her body and her arms, so he wouldn’t think about feelings and wouldn’t let himself wonder what would happen when their passion ended.
With infinite care Tynan aroused her, taking them on another journey, making love to her with fierce passion. In return she tasted him, brought him to the edge before he took her to a heavenly climb. He fell off the edge of the earth and found a new ecstasy within her body.
Alenna sank into his arms with a sigh, her smile replete and thoroughly content. She fell asleep again, nestled close.
A desire to cherish her, to give her anything and everything she wanted flowed like a warm wine in his blood. That she hadn’t spoken, hadn’t insisted on talking about what had happened between them, made him glad.
Because he was terrified.
He’d vowed so long ago never to make love to a woman again.
Celibacy did not worry a man when he put his body through the paces, training for battle, working his muscles each day until he fell on his pallet too tired to think of anything as basic as his animal needs. This woman from the future had changed everything. Her intelligence, her loving nature, and her determination had whittled away at the fortress he’d built.
The ache in his soul increased as he gazed at her. His commitment to stay away from the raw attraction he’d felt for her had crumbled, despite her foreign ways and stubbornness. He’d seen her generous nature … how loving she could be. What could he say about her bravery?
How many other women did he know that could have faced the baron and her fear of the dungeons, all for the sake of a young boy? How many women did he know that would risk their life to save Caithleen? Risk her life to save him twice. Why had she been sent through time to him? A devil’s torture? A curse meant to drive him mad?
The noose around Tynan’s heart squeezed so hard it hurt.
He could not. Simply would not fall in love with her.
Shifting Alenna out of his arms slowly, he rose from the bed and hastily dressed. Maybe if her sweet skin didn’t press against him his head would clear, and he’d think more like the man he’d been yesterday. Sweet lord, help him. Going back to yesterday wouldn’t help! Going back to the time before she had appeared from the mist would not help. For now he knew the overwhelming pleasure of sharing passion with her.
He covered her carefully with a plaid and went into the other room. He stared blankly around the room, as if he’d entered a foreign land. Alenna had dazed him. Stunned him with the force of emotion she’d generated, and he felt a strange hollowness fill him.
What if she left? What if she went back to her time?
A lump closed his throat, and he had to take a gasping breath to relieve the sensation.
Finally his gaze dropped to the table. The necklace.
He didn’t even recall removing the glittering gems from her neck last night. But then he’d been too consumed with fire to care. Even now she still wore the ring he’d placed on her finger.
Turning away from more wealth than he’d seen in his life, he went to the hearth. After stoking up a fire, he lowered himself into a chair. Putting his arms on the table and his head on his arms, he thought about what he should do.
Outside the wind screamed again, like a woman who had lost her only love.
* * *<
br />
Alenna woke as the first light of day broke through the shuttered window, and the iciness of the air penetrated the generous plaid covering her nakedness.
She reached for Tynan but felt only cold fur.
Fear traveled like an arrow into her, and she sat bolt upright. Where was he? Gathering the plaid around her, she left the bed and went into the other room. The last embers of a fire burned in the hearth. Tynan sat at the table, his head down on his arms. Why was he dressed and sitting here asleep when he could have been in her arms?
"Tynan?" she called softly.
He slept on. She watched him and took in everything about him. The blue-black sheen of his hair as it lay against his stubble roughened cheek, the thickness of his lashes, the curve of his lips that could smile, frown, or give her such powerful ecstasy.
She reached out to touch him. He came awake with a start as he sat up. His gaze scoured the room, as if he expected intruders had gained entry.
"What is it?" he asked sharply, standing up so quickly the chair fell backwards with a clatter.
Alenna smiled. "Nothing. I woke and reached for you. You’re out here freezing your butt off, instead of being in bed with me."
When he didn’t smile she felt a twinge of worry. Something in his look was different. She searched for a way to decipher what she saw in his eyes. A wariness, a distrust almost. No … something far deeper. Then she recalled when he’d told her he’d once loved a woman and had regretted it. She’d seen that same look at that time. He bent to retrieve the chair, righting it back onto the legs.
Alenna reached for him again, instinctively seeking his warmth and his arms. "What’s wrong, Tynan?"
Instead of embracing her as she expected, he took her arms and put her away from him. The hurt went straight through in a raw punch.
Like a restless animal he paced the floor, then came to an abrupt halt in front of her. "I canna do this."
"Do what?"
"Last night. I should have just taken ye from the feast … not …"
His lack of ability to form words, his hesitation, was unusual. The determined man with the clipped speech she’d come to recognize as vintage Tynan had disappeared.
"I took what only yer guidman should."
Was that all that was bothering him? Her honor? Of course. He was a man of the fourteenth century.
Alenna came closer to him, and she saw him take a deep breath as they almost touched. "As I told you, I wasn’t a virgin. And no one in this time expects me to be. I was supposed to be married once, remember?"
"I had no right. I’m not your guidman."
Reaching up to touch his face, she caressed his hard jaw, rough with dark stubble. "I’m from the twentieth century. People sometimes take lovers and they don’t have to be married. Obviously, it’s not that much different now." She shrugged. "I’ve seen that from the way people took to that party. And here you had me thinking that I should worry about my reputation, and the baron was bold enough to tell me that I shouldn’t live with you because it was unseemly." She grinned so that he wouldn’t think she was actually angry. "All of you are big liars."
Tynan took her hand from his face. He stepped away and tossed wood into the hearth to make a new fire. The rejection in his actions hurt like a bee sting, and with that came anger. Had everything she’d thought she’d seen in his eyes been an illusion? She’d thought she’d seen warmth, tenderness, and raw need. Maybe, God help her, even a little love.
"I’m sorry I took advantage—"
"Stop apologizing," Alenna said, feeling her tether snap. "Once and for all, you didn’t take advantage of me. I could have refused your offer at the party. Instead I put my hand in yours and left and came here with you." She took a sustaining breath and willed him to listen. She moved closer as she spoke, until she stood near him. "You didn’t force me to do anything I didn’t want. It was the most special experience of my entire life."
Still he poked at the fire, refusing to look at her, his face granite hard. He acted as if nothing that had happened the last few weeks had transpired. She was back to square one with him. Back to the day she’d first arrived.
"Tynan, what we had last night … what we have now. I don’t want to lose that … it’s special …"
A flicker of last night’s passion flared in his eyes. She fed on that look and hoped it would grow.
The flame died like a snuffed candle. "I canna make love to ye again."
Alenna licked her dry lips. All the air seemed to suck right out of the room. "I don’t understand. What happened to make you … why are you so cold?"
"I let drink and passion cloud my mind. No more."
As if ice had seeped into her chest, her heart felt heavy and frozen. "Tynan, you loved me like I’ve never been loved before. You took me away from more than the party." Tears backed up in her throat and burned like an open sore. "You took me out of that vile man’s reach."
"And that was how you repaid me?" he asked as he stopped messing with the fire. "By lettin’ me take ye?"
His words, sharp and succinct, blistered her so much that she almost slapped him out of unprecedented rage. Instead she spoke without thinking, without a care as to how he might react.
"How dare you! I did not give you my body as payment. How could you think that? How could you?"
When he gazed at her this time, she saw regret in his eyes. It wasn’t enough.
She took a shuddering breath. "I made love with you."
"It isna love," he said bluntly, coldly. "It canna be."
She’d never known until that instant what it felt like to have her soul torn out and stomped underfoot. Certainly her breakup with her fiancé had been hurtful. But nothing prepared her for the hollow ache occupying the spot where her heart had once resided.
"No," she said softly, the fight draining from her like blood from a wound. "It was just sex. A bed partner for a fortnight, just like you said."
When he said nothing, her heart dropped the final notch.
"Forget it," she said, stomping back to the other room. With haste she threw her dress back on. When he came up behind her, she whirled on him. "Where is my cloak?"
She filled time, asking a question that didn’t matter in the scheme of things. She had to get out. To think about what had happened, before she broke down in tears for the second time in two days.
"What are ye doin’?" he asked as she swept by him into the outer room.
"I don’t know." She put on her cloak and marched toward the door.
"Wait," he said. She had no time to get the door open before he blocked her way.
"Why should I wait, Tynan? Give me one good reason why I’m here. Because if I stay with the baron he’ll treat me like a whore? Beat the life out of me whenever he feels like it?"
"Aye. I told ye that stayin’ here ye wad be safe."
Alenna made a snorting laugh. "Safe? Hardly. You’re here."
"I willna touch ye again. Not even to kiss ye."
Obviously he didn’t plan to move from the door anytime soon, and she didn’t relish the thought of fighting him to get out.
"Is that what you really want?" she asked.
His mouth opened, then closed. Finally he said, "‘Tis how it must be."
"God, you are so full of it."
"Full of what?" His brow creased in mystification.
"I think I see now what your problem is, Tynan of MacBrahin."
When she used his entire name he stiffened, as if his mother had announced an oncoming punishment. Perhaps he remained susceptible to her in a small way. With the slightest trace of hope Alenna pressed her suit.
"Mary’s death wasn’t just a tragedy to you. It scarred your heart in such a way that the only way you can justify the pain is to blame yourself," she said.
His gaze turned hard as rock. "I am to blame."
"You didn’t murder her. Angus did."
"When I took her—" His voice faltered and he cleared his throat. "When she became full with my bairn,
I killed her. She would still be alive if I hadna taken what wasna mine to take."
"She might have still married Angus. You don’t know what would have happened." His silence spurred her on. "You are still in love with her, and you can’t let go of that love."
"Nay, I dinna love her … I canna love—"
"Yes, you can. Admit it. Her death hurt you deeply."
"Aye," he said, the reluctant syllable slipping across his tongue. "Any woman I … any woman I take is cursed to die. I willna see that happen to you."
It came to her then. She saw it in the grim set of his mouth and the anguish in his eyes. Mary’s misfortune certainly didn’t complete the entire story of what tortured his soul. Florie had been pregnant and had been taken from him.
Alenna sank onto the pallet. "What else, Tynan? What else keeps you from me?"
He dropped to his knees in front of her, and when he looked up at her, his gaze had lost its chill. Tynan begging for her sympathy? That this big, strong man needed her understanding came as a sobering thought. Did she really have that much control over him?
His hands rested on his trews covered thighs, and for a wayward fraction Alenna remembered touching those rock hard limbs … tracing her fingers over him. A renewed pulse of desire drummed in her, but she shoved it down. Not now. Maybe not ever again.
"I canna have another woman die because of me. ‘Tis my curse. My mother, when I was ten—" He broke off and swallowed hard. "My father beat her to death in front of me own eyes. And I stood there. I was so scared I dinna move. I let the bastard beat her, Alenna."
"Oh, Tynan," she whispered, laying her hand on his cheek gently. "I’m so sorry."
"When she was … dead … he told me that it wad be a lesson to me. If I disobeyed him, he’d do the same to me."
"You were ten. You couldn’t have done anything to save your mother."
"Aye, I could have. I could have done somethin’. I stood there like an ox and listened to her screams."
She sank to her knees in front of him, tears coming to her eyes. She cupped his rugged face between her palms and caressed his cheeks with her thumbs. "You were in shock. Your mother’s death was your father’s fault. And Mary died because of Angus. Florie died under the hands of a murderer. Other people did these horrible deeds. Why are you blaming yourself?"
A Bridge Through The Mist Page 22