by Bec Botefuhr
“Give me whatever you feel is right Jax.” I say, my voice cold.
“Give me a number.”
“No, you chose to leave us. You give me a number.”
He stares at me for a long moment and then sighs. He pulls out his wallet and slides out a cheque. He scribbles on it then signs it, before handing it to me. I snatch it out of his hands but don’t check the amount. I don’t care. Not right now.
“Where will you go?” He asks.
“Somewhere you will never find me again.” I hiss.
He looks hurt. How dare he pretend to look hurt. “I…guess that’s for the best.”
“How can you live with yourself? Honestly? That is your daughter in there, your own flesh and blood. She will grow up and want to know you, how can you just walk away?”
He swallows. “I can’t be right for her now, maybe in a few years when I settle from this, I will contact you.”
“Oh no. You see Jax, if you walk out now, you are done. You won’t get the chance to come back, nor will you EVER be in her life.”
“You can’t…”
“I can and I will. I am going somewhere you won’t find me.”
“Jade…”
“No, we are through talking. I hope…I hope you find what it is you are looking for Jax Watts because you risk living an exceptionally long and lonely life.”
I choke on my last words, hold it back Jade. Don’t show him, not now. Be strong. He nods and his eyes are cold, empty. I nod back at him, then turn and walk out of the room. I hurry into Lilly’s room and begin shoving her clothes into a suitcase and then I zip it up. My father comes in his eyes hurt.
“Jade don’t leave.”
“I can’t do this daddy, I can’t. I need to leave, to find myself again. Please, don’t stop me.”
He pulls me into his arms and holds me while I tremble with sobs.
“I will give you money, set you up anywhere you want.”
“Jax gave me some and I have some from when I left the kingdom.”
“I will fix up the remaining amount then, any extra you need.”
“Promise me something?”
“Anything, baby girl.”
“Don’t ever tell him where I am, or anybody for that matter.”
“Deal.”
My father helps me pack, Jax is gone by the time I am done, I do not see him again and I know quite possibly that I never would. I know this is it; I am being forced to move on, to make a life on my own and my heart tears at the thought. I have to begin again, alone. My father drives me to the airport; Lilly curled up in my arms. We sit staring at the sky, waiting for the plane, alone in our thoughts.
When he slips to the bathroom, I take Lilly in my arms and stare down at her innocent face. I have to be strong, for her. I am now not only a mother, but a father too and she would need me through her life to keep her on her feet. I feel a warm tear slide down my face and drop off onto her hair. I will never forgive Jax for this; he is starting a life for us, without him. How would I ever get through that alone?
They say time heals everything; time only tore this wound, ripping a bigger hole in my heart. In my case, time healed nothing; time only made it so much worse and yet something deep inside tells me, that Jax and I are far, far from being finished.
THE END
KEEP AN EYE OUT FOR THE NEXT BOOK IN THE PIRATE SERIES – BETRAYED.
72