“Of course, dear,” Gina added, giving Grace another shock. “I can absolutely put myself in your shoes. You’re a long way from home. Coming back here to face Mica would take a lot of courage, not to mention the logistics.”
“Well, I say it’s time to move on,” Sam said.
“Sam’s right.” Gina took the bottle out of Jules’s mouth and put a clean dish towel over her shoulder before holding him against it and patting his back. Jules gave a huge burp and giggled. Gina nestled him back into the crook of her arm. “What an angelic face.”
“I think so, too,” Grace said. And every time I look at him I’m reminded of Mica. His father. The man I’ll always love.
Her phone pinged with a text.
I’m going into town. Don’t be here when I get back. Please.
They all heard the roar of the pickup as Mica spun the wheels on a patch of ice and backed down the drive.
Grace looked at Gina. “Mica’s really raw. And I’m just as upset. I should take Jules and go.” She reached for him but Gina turned away from her.
“Just a minute. Now, where are you staying? And when do I get to see this little guy again?”
“Gina...” Sam gave her a warning tone.
“Sorry,” Gina said. “But I just met him. I need details.”
“You have every right to know my plans. I’m staying with Mrs. Beabots. Her apartment is empty and Aunt Louise doesn’t have room for us. I’m here for nine days to acclimate Jules to Mica, and Mica to his son. Then I need to get back to Paris. I need to leave Jules with Mica for two, maybe three months until I can get my spring show under my belt. It’s a make-it-or-break-it situation. These months will determine the rest of my life!”
“Seems to me your son is determining your life,” Gina said.
Grace hung her head. “He is.” Then she met Gina’s eyes. “I don’t know how to explain this without coming off as selfish and self-centered, but I really do want the best for my boy.” Grace felt chills scamper down her spine and her eyes filled with tears. Ever since she’d left Indian Lake last time, waved goodbye to Mica, she’d been an emotional wreck. To be fair, she’d been pregnant most of that time. Still, these days, she cried at the drop of a hat. She told herself that it was hormones. Lack of sleep. But deep down, the truth was always there. It was all about Mica.
“And you honestly think you’re going to get Mica to care for Jules?”
“I was hoping he’d fall in love with him at first sight, but Mica is so closed off from us...now I wonder if it’s even possible.”
“Hmm. That is interesting, isn’t it?” Gina pondered as she handed Jules to Grace. “I think the best thing is to let Mica cool off, which he will, and then you need to put him through his basic training. He hasn’t the first clue about babies. As much as he loves Zeke, he had nothing to do with him when he was an infant. He likes him better now that he can talk.”
“So do I,” Sam joked.
“Oh, you!” Gina waved her palm at him. “Let’s get him bundled up. I’ll do what I can from this end to help you with Mica. Though right now, I’m about the last person Mica is going to listen to.”
“Yeah. I’m not sure either of us have much sway with him at the moment.”
Gina tapped her cheek with her finger. “Grace. Tomorrow, Sam and I are having a New Year’s Eve party and we’re going to announce our engagement. Please come and bring Jules. All your friends will be here and it will be a good time to show off Jules. Hopefully, when Mica sees everyone’s reaction to this little angel, his heart will soften.”
“Do you think so, Gina? After today, I’m wondering if that approach isn’t such a good idea.”
“He knows about the party. You’re my guest. He needs to face his responsibilities.”
Grace put Jules in his Bundleme as Sam replaced all her items in the diaper bag. Gina rinsed out the baby bottle and threw away the inner collapsible sack.
Grace said her goodbyes and accepted kisses from Gina and Sam...her son’s grandparents.
* * *
MICA HAD HOPED to avoid seeing Grace and the baby again by heading into town, but he hadn’t guessed Grace would stop at the Indian Lake Deli. Just his luck. And of course he’d been the one to tell her to leave the farm. Grace arrived twenty minutes after he put in his order and sat down.
When she walked in, he watched as people in line regarded her with awe. He’d been too overwhelmed earlier to notice her stylish, black wool coat, with its black faux-fur collar. She carried Jules in a baby carrier and had a black leather bag over her other shoulder. Everything about Grace was attention-getting.
But it was the way her blue eyes latched on to his from the moment she closed the door. Her smile was faint, but it was there, as if she was happy to see him.
He forced himself not to smile back, but nothing could harness the appreciation in his eyes.
She walked over to him. “Your mom was feeding Jules. Then I realized I hadn’t eaten all day.”
“My mom...”
“I’d left Jules’s bottles of formula in his diaper bag. Your mom and Sam got him sorted while we were...talking. All you do is heat it in the microwave. He likes it at forty seconds. Not too hot and not too cold.”
“Like Goldilocks.”
“Yeah.” She smiled. “It’s nice about the two of them.” Mica’s breath hitched in his chest. His mother and Sam were engaged. They’d been in love for decades. He wasn’t sure he’d ever come to terms with that. Yet Grace was immediately accepting of their relationship. Easy for her. It wasn’t her mother they were talking about. Grace’s mother was dead.
He felt a streak of guilt shoot down his spine. He should be grateful that his mother was still with him, but right now, all he felt was the bite of betrayal.
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“They’re in love and should be together. Just because people get old, doesn’t mean they shouldn’t find companionship and someone to share their lives with.”
He leaned forward, his eyes blazing. “My mother was devoted to my father...”
“She was. But he died, Mica.”
“Stop talking, Grace,” he said lowly so as not to be heard by the others around them. “You don’t know anything about my family.”
“I know a lot about people,” she countered. “Apparently, more than you do.”
“Barzonni?” Julia Melton called. “Barzonni? You here?”
Mica turned. “We’re here.”
“Your order is up.”
Mica handed Julia cash and she rang up the sale. Mica was glad he had his back to Grace, so she wouldn’t see the confusion he knew was on his face. He’d just answered Julia in the plural, as if Grace and Jules were his family.
Mica was no family man. Or was he?
CHAPTER FIVE
ONE OF THE things Grace loved about Indian Lake was how all Aunt Louise’s friends welcomed her with open arms. And as usual, Mrs. Beabots was the first to offer.
Grace owed Mrs. Beabots not only her first Paris connections, but now the use of the apartment in Mrs. Beabots’s Victorian mansion also. Grace had known she couldn’t possibly squeeze both herself and Jules into Louise’s one-bedroom apartment above the ice-cream shop. It had been fun to crash on the sofa when she was a teenager, but with a baby who sometimes didn’t sleep the whole night through, Grace didn’t think any of them would get much rest in such tight quarters. After all Aunt Louise had done for her, staying somewhere else was the least Grace could do.
Normally, Louise left for Florida each winter, but because of her back injury, she hadn’t gone the year before and had given up the house she’d been leasing then. The new people had rented it for the next three years at a higher fee. Louise feared that her Florida days were over.
Luckily, Mrs. Beabots ha
dn’t rented her upstairs apartment to anyone and she was delighted to have Grace and the baby staying with her.
Once Grace had unpacked and settled in, Mrs. Beabots invited her for afternoon tea. She’d already invited Louise, as well as Sarah, who lived next door. Sarah had given birth to a baby girl, Charlotte, only three days after Jules was born on July 1, and Grace was looking forward to having her friend so close by.
Jules was still napping when Grace headed downstairs at four, but because he was used to being transported from her Paris apartment to her studio, where designers shouted at each other over the cutting tables and sewing machines whirred, he could just about sleep through anything.
Grace put Jules, in his baby carrier, on Mrs. Beabots’s kitchen island just as Aunt Louise walked in.
Louise smiled at their elderly host. “I brought you a plate of brownies I made this morning.”
Mrs. Beabots grinned. “Those are the brownies for your brownie-nut-fudge ice cream, I presume.”
“They are.”
“How generous of you to share with us, Louise. We’ll put them out with the pecan and cranberry sandies I made. The tea is nearly ready. Sarah should be here any minute. I thought we’d sit in the front parlor. Luke put in a new heater for me out there and it’s quite toasty.” She winked. “The babies won’t get cold and we can watch the snowfall as the neighborhood Christmas lights come on.”
“Sounds lovely,” Grace replied, taking the china plate of cookies out to the front parlor as she hefted Jules’s carrier in her right hand. She set him on a red velvet Victorian chair. “Oh!” Grace exclaimed, spotting the skinny fir tree in the corner. “You have a Christmas tree out here.”
Louise placed the brownies on the coffee table. “Very pretty.”
“My big tree is in the library, as usual,” Mrs. Beabots explained. “But I spend so much time in here, reading and visiting, that it’s a shame not to have some of my favorite ornaments out to enjoy all the time.” Mrs. Beabots pointed to the tree. “All these are from Paris. Don’t you love the pink, gold and aqua? They were in vogue back in the sixties.”
“I’d love to hear more of your stories,” Grace said as the antique doorbell rang.
“That would be Sarah,” Mrs. Beabots said, placing the teapot on the coffee table. “I’ll be right back.”
“Uh-huh. Just in time not to disclose anything juicy about Paris or Coco Chanel, huh?” Grace teased.
Louise winked at her niece. “She’ll never spill.”
“Not even to me?” Grace asked.
“Never. Secrets are her passion. Along with these cookies.”
Sarah followed Mrs. Beabots into the room, holding a pink bundle. “Grace!” she squealed. “I’m so happy to see you!” She gave Grace a one-armed hug. “This is Charlotte. Annie’s on her way over. She had to walk Beau first. She’s dying to talk to you.”
“Goodness. I’m flattered, but why?”
“Oh,” Mrs. Beabots said impishly as she took Sarah’s coat. “You’ll see. She’s a million questions, that one. Tea, Sarah? You know you can have my mint-and-bourbon tea now that you’re not nursing.”
“True,” Sarah replied. “I’d love some tea.” She glanced at Grace. “Are you breastfeeding?”
“No. I had to go back to work five days after Jules was born. I took him to the studio with me, but formula let me be a bit more flexible with his feeding.”
“You’re kidding. They let you do that? Bring him in, I mean.”
Grace smiled. “Summer was a slow time for us and I’m the team leader. Though, once things ramped up in the fall, it was too hectic and Jules could feel my stress. I found a nanny, but she was clearly more interested in becoming a designer than she was in taking care of Jules. I was basically tutoring her while still doing the lion’s share of childcare.”
Sarah shook her head. “I can’t believe you got any work done at all! I’ve been able to take a longer mat leave, at least, but my whole day revolves around Charlotte. Sometimes I don’t even have time to eat, let alone do anything creative.”
Grace felt a rush of shame. The whole reason she’d come back to Indian Lake was that she couldn’t handle it all. How could anyone understand her motivation for leaving her baby here so she could continue her work half a world away? On the surface, she sounded like a heartless monster. She lifted her hand to Jules and let him curl his fingers around her forefinger. He smiled at her and when he did, the pacifier in his mouth wiggled and wobbled like it always did. Grace felt her heart tighten and then burst with love.
“I honestly don’t know how I’ve made it the past six months,” she admitted. “Well, year, really. Jules deserves so much more than I can give him right now. It was tough enough working seven days a week and most nights being pregnant.” She lifted her eyes to Louise. “Thank goodness I inherited sturdy genes.”
Louise’s eyes misted as she put a hand on Grace’s shoulder. “You’re a good mother, Grace, and this decision has to be unbearably difficult.”
Sarah shot her a confused look, and Grace explained about leaving Jules with Mica. She kept the part about not telling him until today to herself.
Sarah spread a baby quilt on the floor and put Charlotte on top. She kissed her baby’s head. “Kudos to you, Grace. Seriously, I couldn’t do what I do if I didn’t have Luke and the kids to help. And that’s not counting Miss Milse, who practically lives at the house, and Mrs. Beabots, who is the best friend ever.” Sarah reached for Mrs. Beabots’s hand and squeezed it. “I have so much support and there you are all alone in Paris...” Sarah shook her head.
The flood of gratitude that engulfed Grace almost moved her to tears. Her throat thickened with emotion. “You all are what I have been missing in my life in Paris. I have my team members, but I’m their boss. They look to me for support. Not the other way around. I’m their rock.”
“No wonder you’re worn out,” Mrs. Beabots said, pouring the tea. “Everyone needs a rock to lean on. And someone who motivates them. Who motivates you, Grace?”
Grace stared at the older woman. She’d never been asked such a question. What did motivate her, other than the goals she’d set for herself? And then the truth hit her. Mica.
Yes, she’d wanted to prove to herself that she had what it took to succeed. But deep down, she’d also wanted to show Mica that she wasn’t a silly girl prancing down a pageant runway.
And there was Jules, of course. Once she’d discovered she was pregnant, Grace had become driven to succeed for her child. She would have to provide financial security and a good foundation for him. Above all, she wanted to be the kind of person her child would be proud of and would want to emulate.
“Just Jules,” Grace finally said. “He’s become the center of my heart.”
Mrs. Beabots threw Grace an unconvinced look as she sipped her tea and gently placed the cup back on her saucer. “I never had a child, but ever since Sarah was born, I have felt she was almost my own. Now with Annie and Timmy in and out of my house as much as they are, and baby Charlotte, I can understand how a child could be nearly all a woman would need.” She paused and lifted her cup once more. “Nearly.”
Grace’s eyes didn’t leave Mrs. Beabots’s face. She felt as if the octogenarian knew everything about her feelings for Mica. And her passion for her career and her love for her baby. Maybe even more than Grace did herself.
“Why don’t you put Jules on the quilt and see if he and Charlotte get along?” Sarah asked.
“Good idea,” Grace replied and lifted Jules out of the carrier. She placed him next to blonde Charlotte, who peered at him quizzically and reached out to touch his face.
Jules burst into tears and wailed at the top of his lungs. Grace held him close as she caressed his back. “Apparently, he’s not the people person I’d thought he was,” she joked.
“Is Charlo
tte the first baby he’s met?” Sarah asked.
“Um...yes, actually.”
Louise lifted her chin. “Could be that and the fact that he’s teething. Grace said she was up with him for the past two nights.”
“I’ve got some teething gel that Charlotte likes. And she chews on frozen teething rings. I have an extra in my diaper bag. She’s going through the same thing.”
Grace exhaled and started laughing. She rocked back on her hips and laughed louder.
“What’s so funny?” Louise asked.
“This is all so...unfamiliar to me and yet, normal. I haven’t had a soul to talk about babies with—what to do or even what to ask. I’ve been winging it for months. Granted, I read books when I could keep my eyes open and I listened with one ear at the pediatrician’s office, but frankly, I was so busy texting and emailing my team that I guess I didn’t listen all that well.”
“What about Mica?” Sarah asked. “Hasn’t he been pitching in at all, even from across the ocean?”
Grace bit her lip, and an awkward silence fell over the group.
Sarah blinked. “What’d I say?”
Louise and Mrs. Beabots both gave Grace expectant looks. Grace sighed.
“I guess everyone will find out soon enough. Mica didn’t know about Jules...until today.”
Sarah put a hand to her mouth. “Oh, Grace...”
Jules had quieted down, so Grace put him back in his carrier, where he seemed to be perfectly happy. “It’s okay. I mean, it’s not okay. I messed up.” Grace sat back. “He’s angry. I guess I hadn’t prepared myself enough for his recriminations. But I hurt him. I know it and I wish I’d handled things differently.” More softly, she said, “I never intended to cause him so much pain.”
Sarah reached over and put her hand on Grace’s forearm. “Grace, you’ve been in love with him since you were fifteen. I’ve always known that. Maddie does, too. None of us will ever judge you. We love you. We always have.”
Grace burst into tears and hugged Sarah. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Why can’t I be happy to pull up stakes, move back to Indian Lake and live with all of you? Why do I keep banging my head against the Bastille of Paris design houses?”
His Baby Dilemma Page 6