by A. D. Ryan
“He kissed you?”
I nodded, my entire body starting to warm as I remembered his hands on me, running up along my right side until his thumb grazed the swell of my breast. “At first, I figured maybe he just couldn’t take the tension between us—we had been teasing each other a lot over the first few days. God, Willow, I have never felt anything like that before. I just felt so safe in his arms, like we were the only two people in the world.”
“At first?” she questioned, placing her chin in her palm, her elbow resting on the tabletop.
“Yeah, in reality, he had heard Dane say he wasn’t going anywhere and wanted to show him there was nothing here for him anymore.”
“Hot,” Willow said, nodding her head in approval. “So, when do we get to the naked part?”
I blushed again. “Well, as we were kissing, I got so wrapped up in it that my hands started moving all over his body until they rested at his waist—”
“You totally de-toweled him, you little hussy!” she exclaimed, eyes shining with excitement.
I shook my head. “Not intentionally. But his towel did fall off all on its own.” Willow’s eyes continued to widen as I, embarrassingly, told her how turned on Jensen was—how turned on we both were.
“But …” Willow’s ears perked at that, her eyebrows pulling together in confusion.. “He’s not ready for a relationship. And to be honest, neither am I. I need, I don’t know, some time after Dane. I need to figure my shit out before I just hand my heart over to another man.”
“So, you’re just messing around?” I waited for her to judge me, but she just shrugged. “He seems like a good guy, Madison.”
I nodded, but shrugged at the same time; I knew he was, but it still didn’t stop the fear that Dane had left in his wake. After Dane, I had put up these walls to protect myself, and I wasn’t ready for them to come down—for anyone. “Even though we’ve agreed on what this is, I guess I’m still a little apprehensive about the whole thing. I mean, he’s been great. Taking care of me and being so protective, but—”
“But what? Madison, he’s not Dane.”
“I know that.” I started to pick at my fingernails, avoiding Willow’s eyes completely. “Jensen has been great, and I’ve learned just how much he cares about his family, which is admirable, but what Dane did—how he always apologized for his behavior while telling me that I shouldn’t get him worked up like that—it’s so burned into my memory that I sometimes wonder if he was right. Maybe it is me that brings it out in people.”
“I need to kick Dane in the balls,” Willow announced, shaking her head dramatically. “Madi, what Dane did to you—how he treated you—was not your fault. The bastard was gas-lighting you in order to maintain the power in your relationship by stripping your self-confidence. I mean, you’re gorgeous and have legs for days—”
“I’m only a few inches taller than you,” I said, smirking at her as she tried to validate me.
“All of which is leg. Just shut up, okay?” Doing as she asked, I listened instead. “You’re funny and smart. And I’d guess an animal in the sack considering the mouth on you at times.” I blushed again as she winked and giggled. “Try to see what I see in you. What Jensen and so many others see in you. You’re amazing and strong, and you’re so much happier with him gone.”
With a roll of my eyes, I stood up to get another glass of water. “You’re only saying this because you’re my friend.”
Willow’s laugh carried through the kitchen. “I guess now’s a good time to tell you I never really liked you then, huh?” she teased, and I retaliated by tossing a dishtowel at her face across the kitchen. “All I’m saying is: live a little. Have some fun. He’s not asking you to marry him … yet.”
“Thanks. No pressure, or anything, right?” I asked sarcastically, glancing at the clock and frowning when I realized it was half-past one and the guys hadn’t stopped by for lunch.
“What’s wrong?” Willow asked.
“The guys aren’t here for lunch. We usually eat at one,” I pouted. I knew Dad wanted to see Willow, so it was strange that they weren’t here.
Willow shrugged it off. “Maybe they got busy. I’ve seen this place in the summer. It can get pretty crazy.”
“Maybe,” I said, reaching for the phone so I could call Jensen. “I’m going to call and see what’s up, though.”
After dialing Jensen’s cell phone number, I waited for him to answer; it only rang once. “What’s wrong?” he answered frantically, causing me to laugh.
“You’re so paranoid,” I told him. “Nothing’s wrong. Well, except you guys aren’t here. Did you get busy or something?”
“Oh, uh,” Jensen said nervously, and I could hear a chair shift on his end before the background noise suddenly quieted. “We’re eating at your dad’s. We thought you guys would want a little girl time. Sorry.”
“No, it’s okay,” I said, the pout in my voice audible.
“Have you eaten yet?” he inquired.
I shook my head and spoke simultaneously. “Not yet. I’ll make something for us now, though. I’ll, uh, see you in a bit?”
“You bet.” He paused for a minute, and I heard my dad calling for him. “I should go. See you soon.”
We hung up, and when I turned back to Willow, she was standing on the other side of the island, elbows on the countertop, face-in-hands and smiling a smile that rivaled my own dorky grin. “You may be having fun, but you’re going to fall hard, Madison Landry,” she stated, her voice melodious as she almost sang the words. “You’re not exactly the casual sex kind of girl.”
“What do you want for lunch?” I asked, trying to ignore her, because, deep down, I knew she was right.
Willow shrugged. “What do you have?”
“Well, I could make soup, or sandwiches, or both?” I paused to look in my pantry. “Tomato and grilled cheese?” It was Willow’s favorite.
Not moving from her spot at the counter, Willow made yummy noises as I started lunch. Within fifteen minutes we were back at the table and eating. “I swear, Madi, you make the world’s best grilled cheese sandwich. If I weren’t straight—or in a relationship—I’d marry you.”
“Over grilled cheese? Brandon hasn’t mastered this sandwich yet? Does he not know you at all?” I joked.
“He’s got his talents, none of which are in the kitchen—well …” she paused to contemplate something before I recognized the filthy glint in her eyes “… sometimes he’s talented in the kitchen.”
“You two are never allowed to be alone in my kitchen,” I warned, taking the last bite of my sandwich.
Willow smirked, avoiding my eyes, and I knew what she was going to say before she opened her mouth. “You mean, again, right?”
Speechless. Willow had rendered me completely speechless. My mouth opened and closed as I tried to think of something to say. Finally, I just laughed. “Willow!”
“You weren’t home,” she said with a shrug as she stood up and cleared the table for me.
After Willow cleaned up lunch, she pulled me from the table and dragged me to my room. “What are you doing?”
“Getting you into something a little less frumpy,” she told me. “You’re going to rock those jeans I bought you a few months ago.”
I groaned. I knew girl-time would quickly turn into dress-up. “Will, I can’t wear those on the ranch. I’ll ruin them.”
“You’re not riding in them. Plus, when Jensen sees how sweet your ass looks in them, he won’t be able to take his hands off of you.” I swear I saw her sprout devil horns and a tail as she deviously plotted some master hook-up plan in her little matchmaker brain.
Willow plopped me down on my bed before heading to my dresser and digging through it until she found the jeans she was talking about. They were great jeans, and I couldn’t deny that they made my ass look spectacular. They just weren’t practical for work. They were a dark wash denim, slightly faded on the thighs, and they had thick, blue stitching at all the seams. I loved
them. I did. I just had nowhere to wear them.
“Okay,” Willow said, tossing them next to me. “Strip. I’ll go find you a shirt that will make Jensen fall over when he sees you.”
I didn’t get a chance to protest before she headed to my closet and disappeared inside. What was scary was that my closet wasn’t a walk-in. I removed my yoga pants and slid my legs into the jeans pulling them up and fastening them before checking myself out in the mirror across the room.
“Perfect!” she exclaimed, her voice quiet and muffled from her hiding spot.
“No way!” I told her as she reemerged with a top that she had forced me to buy a year ago for a night out. “Willow, it’s satin. We’re not going clubbing.”
“Fine,” Willow huffed before disappearing again. “I’ll find something casual, yet still wow-worthy.”
“It’s hot outside. Can’t I just wear a tank top?” I inquired, carefully lifting Jensen’s shirt over my head. As it passed by my face, I wished that I’d have given it back to him after washing it so he’d have worn it before I stole it back. I wanted it to smell like him. I suppose I could go roll in his bed … or is that creepy?
“A tank top? Seriously?”
“Yeah, why not? They’re tight, low cut, basic. Less is supposed to be more, right?” Man, I hoped I was wearing her down before she came out with another ridiculous bar shirt.
I could hear her giggle in my closet. “Actually, I never thought of it like that. Plus, you’ll be showing a lot of skin.” She contemplated it further. “Okay, I give you my blessing.”
She rifled through my dresser again before bringing me a white, ribbed tank top. As I pulled it on over my head, cringing slightly as my left side strained, Willow went and changed into a pair of jeans that she could comfortably ride in. I stopped by the kitchen to take my afternoon painkillers before we headed for the door and put our shoes on so we could make our way to the barn.
The summer heat was no joke. Upon entering the barn, we saw that the stalls were all empty. Willow and I went and grabbed Halley’s lead so we could go and catch her. I would leave that to Willow since I had promised Jensen I would do “boring” things while Willow had all the fun. On our way to Halley’s paddock, a flash of movement in the outdoor arena caught my attention, and I stopped dead in my tracks when I realized what it was.
Jensen. On a horse.
Sweet Jesus. It may have been hotter than naked-Jensen. I shook my head. Okay. Not hotter, but it ran a pretty close second. Watching a man riding a horse with confidence and skill was basically porn to me. I couldn’t help it.
He was atop Ransom, with Tom standing in the center of the arena watching. Ransom’s lope was smooth, controlled, and Jensen looked so at home on him. His seat was deep in the saddle as Ransom moved, and his hands didn’t budge an inch between strides. He’d said he could ride, but I figured maybe he was embellishing just how well. Turned out he wasdn’t.
“Madison, you’re drooling,” Willow whispered, nudging me with her elbow as she tried to tear my eyes away from him. I couldn’t, though. I was completely fixated on him. Ransom’s gait was fluid, his neck rounded perfectly; Jensen made riding him look effortless.
“Okay, Jensen,” I heard Tom say. “Ransom did well. You can cool him down for the day. Good session.”
Once Ransom slowed to a walk, Jensen’s eyes found mine, and he smiled and offered me a quick wink before Willow dragged me off to the pen. I raised a hand to wave at him before nodding in the direction of Halley’s pen. It was hard to tear my eyes away from him as he sat on the massive Trakehner stallion, but Willow was having none of it.
“Ugh, don’t make me blind you, woman! You’ll see him soon enough.”
As Willow slipped into the paddock that Halley and a few other mares shared, I stayed on the outside, knowing that, even though the horses were all pretty well behaved, it was a little too risky in my condition. If something went wrong, there was no way I’d be able to move fast enough.
Willow approached Halley, who huffed and snorted upon seeing the halter. With the halter in place, Willow led her to the exit, and I went to open it for her, running my hand along Hails as they passed. Sadness wormed its way back in because I couldn‘t ride her, but at the same time, I was happy that at least she was going to be getting some exercise.
“No jumps, okay? Dad said the vet okayed her for light ground work,” I explained.
“Sounds good. Is your locker combination still the same?” she asked as she tethered Halley up outside to groom her.
“Sure is. If you need help, I’m sure Jeff’s around here somewhere.” I gave Halley one last pat before looking at Willow. “I actually wanted to go and talk to Jillian about seeing if she’d be interested in me teaching a couple of her lessons during the week. If you have any problems, come find me, okay?”
Willow nodded, blowing lightly on Halley’s nose and laughing when Halley started nodding her head up and down. I left the two of them and headed back to the barn to see if Jill was able to talk. I still wanted to talk to her about maybe taking April on for some private training. As I walked back past the outdoor arena, I noticed it was empty, and it made me sad. I could have done with seeing Jensen on a horse again—even if it was doing unspeakable things to my libido.
Inside the barn, I saw Ransom tethered without his saddle, but no Jensen. I frowned, but figured maybe Tom or Dad needed his help with something. One look at the lesson board, told me that Jill was scheduled to be in a session, so instead of just going into the arena, I decided I’d go to the viewing gallery and watch until she was done.
As I walked to the gallery entrance that was through the locker room, I spotted Jeff. “Hey.”
“Hey, Madi. How’re you doing? Dad says you’re feeling better.”
Offering him a smile, I nodded. “Yeah. Feeling pretty good. Hey, Willow is here and she’s going to take Halley for a ride. Can you grab my tack and run it out to her?”
“Sure thing, boss,” he said, even tipping his head and saluting me.
Laughing, I carried on through the locker room. The gallery was empty as I entered, but the arena wasn’t. Jillian was there and so was Jensen. They stood in the center of the arena, completely oblivious that I was there watching them. Jillian said something, smiling flirtatiously while she did, and Jensen laughed. I watched their exchange for a while before I felt my earlier fears seep back in.
I knew I had no right to be jealous. We were just messing around, after all. So why did I feel this way?
In an instant, my protective walls had built reinforcements, and just as I turned to leave the gallery, Jensen looked up and saw me. He offered me a smile, but I only shook my head and walked away.
“Madison, wait!” I heard Jensen call, opening the side door to the viewing gallery.
“It’s okay, Jensen, really.”
“What is?” he asked, catching up to me and wrapping a hand gently around my wrist to stop me before I could make it to the locker room.
I turned to him, my eyes connecting with and then quickly leaving his. “Whatever you and Jill have going on. I get it. She’s great. Besides, we’re just messing around, right?”
Jensen cocked an eyebrow at me. “What the hell are you talking about? There’s nothing going on with us. She asked for my help as I was brushing down Ransom.”
“Didn’t look like help,” I mumbled childishly, dropping my eyes to the floor as I toed it with my shoes. I didn’t want to feel this way, all meek and insecure, but I couldn’t help it.
Jensen placed his index finger under my chin to coax my eyes to his. “Madison,” he said, his voice soft and enthralling. Our eyes locked, and soon I was lost in a sea of blue with little flecks of gray and green swimming around.
Before I could speak—whether to apologize or tell him this was a bad idea, I didn’t know—Jensen’s mouth was on mine, frenzied and ravenous. It took a minute for my lips to catch up to his as my brain tried to process what was happening.
Melting i
nto Jensen’s hard, sweaty body, my eyes fluttered closed. My arms wound up around his neck as he pressed me into a hidden corner of the gallery, just outside the locker room. Our breathless moans filled the room as we completely gave in to the desire that flowed through our veins.
My hands fisted his hair—I really liked his hair—while his roamed over my body until they gripped my ass. Warmth spread throughout my body. My skin was on fire beneath my clothes as he continued to knead my ass. Our passion gained momentum as though it were on a downward slope, and before I knew what I was doing, I moved one hand down his neck and over his chest until I found the hem of his shirt. I slid it up the smooth skin of his body before trailing it back down toward his belt.
His abdomen quivered beneath my feather-light touches as I traced the waist of his jeans, and he removed his lips from mine. “Madison …” he whispered breathlessly, resting his forehead to mine. “We can’t. I could hurt you.”
“I’m not asking you to fuck me, Jensen,” I told him, his eyes widening at my profanity. “Just don’t stop touching me.”
With a groan, his eyes closed and his lips reclaimed mine, causing waves of lust to consume us wholly. Without another thought, Jensen tightened his grip on my backside and lifted me, my legs wrapping around him until he pressed his hips flush against mine. I could feel his erection through our jeans, and I desperately wanted to shed the layers between us and feel him completely. Flesh on flesh. I whimpered into his mouth—a little louder than expected—when he thrust his hips into mine, hitting me where I ached.
As our hips pushed against one another hastily, he used one hand on my ass to leverage me while the other trailed up my right side and groped my breast over my shirt. His touch was firm, yet gentle, and I yearned for more. “Touch me,” I pleaded, removing my mouth from his as my breaths turned to pants.