by Wendy Vella
“You’re in a muffin boat, McBride. You can’t be serious?” Hope taunted him. She’d never been part of a group like this, but thought she could begin to like it.
Her future was uncertain, but she knew one thing, Newman would be in it in some capacity. Husband or lover, or just friend, he would now feature in her life, because they were going to share a child, and last night, as she lay staring at the ceiling, she’d realized that she also cared about him—which was a good thing too.
He watched her push off as he did the same.
“We are not sitting behind her, Newman. I want to win this, because my sister will give me shit for the rest of my natural life and into the afterlife if I lose to her, so for fuck’s sake, concentrate!”
“You want those dancing lessons bad?”
“Real bad.”
It wasn’t a great distance to row, and the Texans, as it turned out, had a seaworthy and mobile craft, and shot out to the lead. Buster and Jake were on their tail, with Newman and Noah a close third. Turning, he saw Hope and Mikey not far behind.
“Row!” Noah yelled.
They rounded the buoy in second place as Jake and Buster’s boat started falling apart. They’d lost the frosting and most of the sides, and were now standing as it slowly sank, saluting.
“Idiots.” Newman laughed. He laughed harder as Branna splashed her husband with her oar in passing.
They drew level with the Texans close to the finish, then it was just straight-out strength. The Texans won by a half a boat length. Newman closed his eyes and sucked in air.
“Texans rule the waves!” Tex crowed, and Newman let him. His muscles were screaming, lungs burning.
“That boat better change course, or it’s going to capsize theirs.”
Newman looked at Brad as he spoke, then out to the water where he was focusing. His heart literally stopped as he saw another boat heading toward Hope’s. It was bigger, and made of wood. They collided, then he watched Hope and Mikey fall into the water.
“No!” He dived back into the lake and started swimming. His arms had been aching seconds ago, but all he felt now was fear. He heard an engine and lifted his head, and found Cubby beside him in an inflatable. Scrambling on board, he looked for Hope, but saw no sign of her.
“She’ll be fine. Neither boat was traveling fast, Newman. Take a breath now.”
“I can’t see her, Cub.”
“She’ll be on the other side, Newman, you need to calm down.”
He tried, but panic clawed inside him. When the boat pulled up alongside the wreckage of Hope’s boat, he searched for her, and found her floating in the water with Mikey and one of the men from the wooden boat. Her eyes were closed.
“She hit her head on our boat as she fell, she’s unconscious!” the man yelled. “The life vest kept her above water!”
Newman didn’t speak, just jumped into the water and reached for her. He lifted her in his arms, and handed her to Cubby as he pulled alongside. He then threw Mikey in, and joined them. The man he left to make his own way back.
“She won’t open her eyes, Newman.” Mikey sounded scared. “She hit that boat hard.”
“You did great holding her, Mikey. Hope’s going to be just fine.”
He heard Cubby talk, but all Newman could do was look at Hope. She was so pale.
“Open your eyes now, Hope.”
“She wasn’t out long,” Mikey said.
“Open now, Hope!”
This time she did, slowly. Her eyelashes fluttered, and then she was looking up at him.
“S-sick.”
He turned her as she started throwing up, holding her head over the edge as she retched repeatedly. As they reached the bank, she was still going.
“I got her now.” Jake took her from Newman so he could jump out. He laid her on the ground, and he and Dr. McBride senior kneeled beside her. Newman moved to her feet and watched.
“Tell me your name.”
“Hope.”
“Full name,” Jake said, checking her pulse.
“Ah, Hope….” She frowned and then winced.
“All right, let’s leave that for now, and get you to the clinic.”
They brought a stretcher, and Newman carried one end with Jake at the other. Hope was transported in Cubby’s cruiser to the clinic. Once there, she was taken away from him by Annabelle, who had accompanied them, and Dr. McBride senior, to be checked out.
“I want to come too.”
“No. Get dried off, then you can see her, because we’ll have checked her over by then.”
“Jake.”
“We got this, Newman, and we’ll take care of your girl and the baby.”
He didn’t leave, just sat in the waiting room in his wet shorts. Buster arrived with a change of clothes. He pulled them on in the waiting room, and took the coffee his friend handed him.
“She was so pale.”
“I know. I saw. Willow was the same that day we pulled her out of that car, remember?”
Newman did. His friend had been inconsolable. He now knew how he’d felt.
“You love her, bud?”
“I don’t know… maybe. How the hell do I know,” Newman growled. “I think about her all the time. She annoys the hell out of me on one hand, and on the other I can’t seem to get enough of being with her.”
“Love, then,” Buster said, stretching out his legs.
They sat silently as the clock in the waiting room ticked by the minutes.
“It’s been too long,” he said after an hour had gone past. “Something is not right.”
“Jake and his mom have this, Newman. Let them do their thing.”
“I can feel it. Something’s not right,” he said again. Just as the last word left his lips, the door opened, and there stood Jake, looking serious.
“Hope?” Newman could barely get the word out as he got to his feet. “Tell me she’s all right, Jake.” Beside him Buster rose and gripped his shoulder.
“Hope lost the baby, Newman.”
“What?” His eyes went from Jake to Buster. “I— How?”
“Actually, it’s unlikely it was due to the accident. Hope said she’d been experiencing cramping this morning. When we brought her in here, she miscarried. Chances are it was about to happen anyway.”
“Well fuck,” Buster snarled.
“I need to see her.” Newman brushed past his friend and ran down the hall, looking in rooms. He found her in a bed, with Annabelle sitting at her side.
“Belle?”
“Hey.” She got to her feet and came to hug him hard. “I’m so sorry, Newman.”
He managed to nod, then stumbled to the bed. Hope lay there looking pale, her eyes focused but not really seeing.
“Hey, sweetheart.” He took her hand in his. It felt limp. “I’m so sorry, Hope.”
She looked at him with eyes that were filled with nothing.
“It’s all right, you can go now. We’re done, the baby’s gone.”
“What?” He couldn’t wrap his head around her words.
“I know you only proposed for the baby. Let’s face it, you would never have otherwise. I’m not a Newman kind of girl.” Her voice sounded different, like she was reading from a book.
Newman shook his head, because he couldn’t seem to comprehend what she was saying.
“It’s best if we just make a clean break.”
“Hope, don’t talk like that. Sure, this is terrible, and heartbreaking, but what’s between us has grown—”
“No.” She shook her head. “I don’t want that, and there is nothing between us. Now please just leave, I’m tired.” Her voice held no emotion; even her face was still.
“Hope, wait. I want to stay with you—”
“I don’t want you to stay with me. I need to sleep, and there’s no point in you sitting here while I do that. So please just go.”
So polite, he thought, and a million miles from the woman he knew her to be.
“Annabelle, are you
still there?”
“I am.” His friend came forward as Hope called for her.
“Make him leave, please.”
“Damn it, you are not just dismissing me, Hope!”
“Please just go.” It was the plea that got to him, the first emotion she’d shown since he’d walked in. Dropping down beside the bed, he looked her in the eye.
“This is not done between us, Hope Lawrence. You feel something for me, as I do for you. Losing the baby is devastating, but we will survive, and I’m not giving up on you or us.”
“I want you to,” she whispered, and his heart broke all over again as a tear rolled down her nose. “We would never have worked. Water and oil, Newman.”
“Let me stay with you, Hope.”
“No, I don’t want that. I n-need to be alone. Looking at you just reminds me of what I’ve lost.”
“We lost.”
“I-I didn’t think it would hurt, but it d-does.”
“Let me hold you, Hope.”
She turned away from him then, and faced the wall, and Newman had never felt that hopeless before.
His shoulders felt heavier, and his feet slow as he turned to his friend.
“I don’t know what to do, Belle.”
Annabelle hugged him hard.
“She’s in shock, Newman. Just give her time.”
He nodded, and walked from the room, and they were the hardest steps he’d ever taken, because they took him away from Hope.
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
One week after she had lost her baby, Hope was still walking around her mother’s house in a daze. How could she be so heartbroken over losing something she’d never had? A baby she had never met? A baby she had not wanted or planned. Losing that tiny life had broken her heart.
Her mother had been a solid and comforting presence, and the only one she wanted at this time. She’d turned everyone else away, including Newman, which she knew was selfish, as he was suffering too. But looking at him reminded her of what could have been, and the reality was that for a brief moment, she’d bought into the dream he’d offered her. Now, however, reality told her she’d been fooling herself. Because she had to face facts. He would never have even contemplated marriage with her were it not for the baby. She’d been deluding herself in thinking otherwise.
The problem was, she couldn’t stop thinking about him now that she was thinking straight once more. She could still see the devastation on his face that her words and the loss of the baby had caused that day at the clinic. His pain, like hers, had been real, and she’d hurt him more.
Looking at you just reminds me of what I’ve lost.
What kind of person said that to a man who was hurting? Why had she tried to hurt him more, when she knew that her words would cut him deep? But right then and there, she’d wanted to be alone desperately, and also to strike at the one person she saw as causing her pain. Irrational, yes, but she’d reacted that way just the same. The next day she’d wanted to talk to him, but been too embarrassed over the way she’d reacted to ask.
“You are an idiot, Hope Lawrence. What’s more, you’re a coward.” He deserved more from her, especially as he’d stood beside her when she’d told him she was pregnant.
“Hope, Sheriff Hawker wants to speak with you.”
Hope rose from the garden bench she was sitting on when her mother called her.
“Coming,” she added, as worry settled in the pit of her stomach. Cubby coming here, had to be linked to what was happening to Wildlife. Hope wondered what had happened now, and knew whatever it was, Casey was pinning it on her.
“Hey” was all Hope could manage when she looked at one of Newman’s closest friends. They must all be seriously pissed with her for the way she’d treated him.
“I’m sorry, Hope. I know this is a hard time for you, but someone broke into the Wildlife house again last night, and stole money, destroyed all their equipment, and took the laptops. Most of their work is gone, and one of their team, Layla Miller, heard a noise and went to investigate. Someone was in there, face covered. They pointed a shotgun at her. She tried to run, but whoever it was knocked her to the ground.”
“Dear God, poor Layla!” Hope had drunk coffee and gone on shoots with her.
“She’s doing okay, just has a really sore head.”
Hope nodded, not sure what else to say.
“The thing is, Hope, Casey Rae Linear is screaming your name loudly again to anyone who will listen. So I’m here to question you, and take another look around.”
“B-but I didn’t do it.”
“Where were you last night?”
“H-here, in bed. I went there early… about eight.”
Cubby looked unhappy, and Hope braced herself for what came next.
“I’ll just need to take a look around now. If you’ll stand to one side, Ms. Lawrence, Hope.”
“My daughter did not do this, Sheriff Hawker. I was here with her all night.”
“You weren’t, however, in her bed with her, Ms. Lawrence, so you can’t verify her movements the entire time.”
“My daughter is not a criminal!”
Cubby heaved out a breath. “It’s that Casey Rae Linear that’s causing all the trouble, and that limp dick Jay Herald. Pardon me, Ms. Lawrence,” Cubby said. “But I have to act on their accusations, because at this time, Hope is the only suspect, with motive, that I have.”
“I happen to agree with you in this instance, Sheriff, about that limp dick, but I would have chosen stronger wording.”
Cubby looked shocked, but rallied. No one in town was used to Millicent Lawrence agreeing with anyone.
“It’s all right, Mom. Let Cubby do his job.” Hope took her arm and moved aside. The Lawrence women then stood beside the door, while he searched the house. It took him an hour, even though the house wasn’t big.
“Nothing here, as I knew there wouldn’t be. I’ll just look around outside now.”
Hope and her mother trailed behind Cubby as he walked. She watched as he opened her mother’s wood box. He reached in and came out with her backpack.
“That’s mine,” she said, moving closer. “But I haven’t seen it for months, since I left Wildlife.”
Cubby shot her a look before opening it. Hope peered inside, and saw the cameras.
“I-I didn’t do it, Cubby. You have to believe me.” Hope staggered back a few steps.
“Well shit, Hope, I know that. This is a set-up, pure and simple, but you have to see that I’m going to need you to accompany me to the Lair.”
She started to shiver, even though the sun was high in the sky and the day warm. Her mother stepped to her side, and wrapped an arm around her waist.
“I won’t let them hurt you, Hope. You have to trust me now,” Cubby said.
“B-but you can’t, Cubby. That proves my guilt.” Hope pointed at the backpack.
“You go on in and get your bag now, Hope, and maybe a sweater, because I can see you’re shivering. Then we’ll head into town.”
Hope ran to get her things, heart pounding in her chest. Was she going to end up in jail for something she didn’t do?
“I’ll follow, Hope.” She nodded at her mother’s words, and followed Cubby to the cruiser.
“What are you doing?”
“Getting in the rear of your car.”
“In the front seat is where you’ll sit.” Cubby frowned. “You’re not a criminal, Hope. What you are is my friend’s girl who I firmly believe is being set up by someone. Plus, a friend of mine. Now get in, and we’ll try and make this shit go away.”
“I don’t think you can.”
“I can, because I’m good at this,” Cubby said, looking grim.
“I’m not Newman’s girl.”
“Yes, you are. I’ve never seen the guy like this before.” Cubby backed the cruiser down her mother’s drive.
“Like what?”
“Less than his usual smart self. The man’s bright, Hope, you had to notice. Probably the smartest
of us all, but don’t tell him I said that. Since you arrived, he’s dumbed down, and since the miscarriage, and you turning him away, he’s a broken man.”
“I never meant to hurt him and I-I don’t want him to be broken. It’s over now, him and me. It was only because of the baby that we were planning anything.”
Cubby made a scoffing sound. “You can’t mean that. The guy’s crazy about you. You just need to spend time with him, and not hide from him, to see that.”
“I’m not hiding. And now I’m probably going to jail, so maybe it’s for the best we’re done.”
Cubby’s hands tightened on the steering wheel. “No one’s putting you in jail.”
“Whatever. The point I’m making is, there is nothing between me and Newman.” Saying the words made her heart ache.
“What about him telling us about the adoption? I mean, he held on to that for years, and now suddenly he comes clean. The guy’s off-balance, and you’re the reason.”
She couldn’t allow herself to agree with him, because it wasn’t true. Cubby had it all wrong.
“This is going to get messy, isn’t it, Cubby?” Hope said, changing the subject. “You have proof in the backseat, and once Casey learns that, she’s going after me with all her might.”
“I’m not going to lie, it likely will be, but I need you to trust me. And what I need to do is find out is who really did the crime. Katie’s working on that now.”
“I like her.”
“Me too.” He gave her a wide smile that flashed a mouthful of white teeth.
The drive was a short one, and the soft curse the sheriff uttered as they pulled up outside the Lair made her tension climb a few more notches. There were two large black SUVs outside.
“Cubby?”
“One minute, Hope. I need to make a couple of calls. You just sit tight.”
Hope tried to relax as he made his first call.
“Maureen, you got company in there?”
Hope watched Cubby, but he remained calm as he listened to whatever his administrator said.
“Okay, I need you to lock the keys to the cell away in the safe now and put my spare set under the filing cabinet in my office. Then call the boys, and tell them to stay away until I say otherwise. I’ll be in shortly with Hope.”