by Sam Crescent
She’d finally been able to afford a full tank of gas, and so she used her car to drive into town toward the local pharmacy. She went in the opposite direction to make sure she didn’t bump into Eli. The last thing she needed right now was to bump into him and let him know her concerns.
Parking the car outside, she looked at the building. No one was inside, apart from the cashier. She could do this.
Hands clammy, she walked into the pharmacy and right up to the pregnancy tests. Even though the cost was shocking, she picked the one that appeared to be the most reliable, and she didn’t have a clue which one really was.
This was just a tester. After grabbing one box with two tests inside, she then grabbed a couple of different ones. She quickly calculated the price into her budget and winced.
No, she needed these tests to know for sure.
With her hands shaking, she put them down on the counter and paid for them.
There wasn’t a moment to lose, not now. Not when her life and future were at stake. The woman looked at her as if she was mocking her or something.
She ignored her and paid for her tests. The woman bagged them up and Ann, with shaking hands, took off back to her car.
There, she sat behind the wheel and wondered where she should take them. The only suitable place was her own home. If Eli was back from dropping off Katie, which he should be, he was going to want to know what was going up. If not, she didn’t know how she was going to explain this to him.
He had a right to know, though.
After climbing back into her car, she took off, hoping that what she was about to do wasn’t going to be a big mistake. Surely, being pregnant wasn’t going to be anything but good news.
She thought about Katie. He’d confided in her how he hadn’t wanted kids. How he’d hated Katie’s mother, but hadn’t wanted her to die, and to a point, he felt a little resentful of the fact she’d given birth and abandoned him.
What would he think of this?
No, she wouldn’t think about his thoughts, not until she knew for sure, and then she’d allow herself to panic.
****
Eli arrived home to find Ann gone. It wasn’t unusual, but considering how she vomited that very morning, he wasn’t going to lie about not being concerned. His conference call started before he got a chance to call her.
The meeting was important as it was about the takeover approach of a smaller tech firm. He wanted it and knew how to reach out to offer the best deal. There was a time he’d been a smaller tech firm, and there was no way he wanted anyone to take his baby from him, so a delicate touch was always needed.
Distractions didn’t help. After the first three hours, he left his man to go and make an offer and to come back to him with a counter-offer.
Switching off his cell phone, he went to check outside and found Ann’s car parked outside her house. Normally, it was covered with a large sheet. He’d noticed she’d gone out, and using his key, he let himself into her home.
“Ann, baby, where are you?” he asked.
There was no sound.
He closed the door, flicked the lock into place, and looked around her house. There was no sign of her downstairs. Making his way upstairs, he heard sniffling and found her sitting on the edge of the bed, holding something in her hand. Tears fell down her face as she glanced up at him.
All she said to him were two words. “I’m sorry.”
She held out the stick and he took it. There was no doubt in his mind what this what, or what it looked like.
Pregnant.
He’d done this before, only, the last time he hadn’t been prepared. He wasn’t prepared this time as he looked at the two lines.
Pregnant.
The word kept swirling around his head.
“How long have you known?” he asked.
“About two and a half hours. It turned positive pretty much immediately.” She sniffled. “I don’t know what to do.”
He looked at her then, really looked at her.
“We didn’t plan this,” she said.
“Babies are not always a planning matter.”
“What do I do, Eli?”
“What do you want to do?” He couldn’t think. His mind was screaming at him to focus, but he hadn’t been expecting this.
“I don’t know. I was hoping you could tell me.”
“You mean about keeping the baby?”
“What?” she asked. “I don’t want to get rid of it, I mean, him, or her. I don’t know.”
He dropped the test and stepped out of the room.
“Eli?”
“I can’t do this shit right now.” He stepped back and rushed downstairs, not really paying attention. He went back into his house, grabbed his car keys, threw himself into his car, and drove. He had to get the fuck away right now.
After seeing her, hearing her, he had to focus, and the only way for him to do that was to drive. He took off out of town and went to the one place he knew he would be able to just be, his parents’.
The moment his mom saw him, she called from her position on the front porch.
Even though he could have bought them a mansion in whatever country they wanted, they had always settled on their four-bedroom, country house, where the lines for the washing were still seen.
Katie loved coming here all the time.
His father appeared. Eli walked up to his dad, who pulled him in for a hug. It didn’t take any words. His father was a master of a few of them.
They left his mother and went down to the basement, his man den. Well, his father’s man den. This was where his dad always came when he wanted peace and quiet away from the busy life that had been given to him.
“What’s goin’ on, son?”
“I don’t know.”
“Cut the bullshit with me. I’m not interested in trying to find out if you smashed the neighbor’s window. You’ve come to me as a man, I’m guessing with problems.”
“Ann’s pregnant,” he said, just blurting it out.
“You don’t want her to be?”
“I don’t know what I want.”
“Then maybe it is time you figured what shit it is you do want,” he said.
“Dad, I don’t know what to do. She’s not going to get rid of it.”
“And is that a bad thing?”
“No.”
“Then I don’t see what the problem is.”
“There isn’t a problem, not a single one,” he said. He collapsed back into his chair, running a hand down his face. His company would be calling him back soon, but for now, he needed to get his shit together right here.
His dad didn’t say a word. Just sat with him while he tried to think and contemplate what was really going on in his life. It was hard, more than hard. “I love her,” he said.
“You do?”
“Yeah. More than I’ve ever loved any woman before in my life. I don’t want to lose her.”
“Then why did you run out here and tell me rather than tell Ann?”
“What if she doesn’t love me back or thinks I only told her because of the baby?”
“Then you make sure your woman knows that you love her for her, not because of some kid.” His father slapped him on the arm. “You know the answers to all of these, Eli. You’re a good kid.”
“Dad, I’m in my forties.”
“So, you’ll always be my son. That will never change. I know when you found out about Katie that you couldn’t stand the mother, but you stuck by her.”
“I didn’t marry her.”
“And is this what you want to do this time?” he asked.
Eli thought about it. Ann’s smile. Her incessant need to make notes and to do her finances and calculations. She also liked to clean, which was odd. Her baking. Listening to her handle Katie when his little girl had one of her tantrums. They were few and far between, but she still screamed the house down from time to time.
All of it.
He wanted it all with Ann.
The damn houses.
Elizabeth was right. The houses were fucking gifted. “I’m going to ask her to marry me.”
“You know, son, you’re going to have to make it up to her. It’s not every single day a woman finds out she’s pregnant and the man runs out on her.”
Chapter Ten
Not only did her revelation send Eli running for the hills, or wherever it was he went, he forgot about his daughter as well. While she was collapsed on the bed, sobbing her heart out, she got a call from Katie’s school to come and pick her up.
Eli had been over an hour late.
She didn’t walk though, opting to take her car after throwing water on her face.
She had to get herself together. There was no way Katie needed to see her like this. She was stronger than this.
So, the guy she was in love with couldn’t handle the thought of being a dad to another kid. No problem. She’d been alone most of her life and even though these past couple of months had been the best of her life, it was coming to an end. She could handle it. There was nothing she could do about his lack of love.
Gripping the steering wheel, she refused to let any more tears out. Crying was for wimps. She wasn’t a wimp. She would get her shit together and all would be okay in the world, in her world.
Katie stood outside with the principal.
The moment she saw her car, she ran toward her. She loved this little girl too, and she wouldn’t let her down.
Katie let herself into the passenger side. “Hey, Ann. Are you feeling better?”
“A little bit.”
“I don’t know why my dad is late. He’s never late. Not now. I know there was a time he never turned up but it’s been a long time since that happened. How are you feeling?” Katie asked. “I learned a lot today in school. I like it when we read, though.”
Ann didn’t need to talk.
Silence for her was easier, especially as Katie took up all of the conversation.
They drove back to her home and Ann cursed, much to Katie’s shock. “I totally forgot about Elizabeth. You want to help me walk the dogs?”
“Yay,” Katie said, throwing her arms up in the air, clearly in celebration.
Smiling, she drove back to Elizabeth’s house and parked the car.
The moment she got to the gate, the dogs came charging toward her, Elizabeth not too far behind. “I was starting to worry.”
“I’ve had a long morning.” Ann offered her a smile.
“Oh, no, shall I get the kettle on?”
“No, it’s fine. Katie and I are going to take the dogs for a walk, and then we’re going to head home. I hope that’s okay.”
“If you need to talk?”
“Maybe later. For now, I just want to deal with this.”
“Of course, of course.”
She got the leads for the dogs and walked them out of the house, down to the park.
Katie ran after them, throwing a ball and playing catch.
Tucking her hair behind her ears, she allowed herself to finally touch her stomach. There were no signs of pregnancy. No bump.
No nothing. Soon she would have a bump. A little piece of her time with Eli.
Would she ever be the same? Watching Katie, she knew it would break her heart to leave the little girl, but what other choice did she have? There were no other choices. Her life was about to change a lot.
After an hour out in the park, Katie was starved, and the dogs were tired. They walked them back to Elizabeth. She held on to the older woman, needing comfort of any kind in their goodbye hug.
Next, they were back in the car, and then at her home.
With her stomach settled, she cooked them up some pasta with vegetables, one of Katie’s favorites as she loved broccoli. The kid was obsessed with it, and she didn’t want to let her down, so broccoli it was, and pasta, possibly some cream, but again, she wasn’t sure.
With everything made up, they sat in the living room, eating.
Katie talked all the time about her school and what she was getting up to.
“And then we’re going to be learning math. I hate math. I like it when we add up and subtract but I hate everything else.” She wrinkled her nose. “What was your favorite lesson in school?”
“I didn’t have one. I just went to school, got my head down, did what I needed to do.”
“You went to college.”
“I know.”
“I want to go to college. I want to be super-smart like you or my dad. Ann, can I ask you something?”
“Sure, you can ask me anything.”
“Would you be my mommy?” Katie asked.
Tears filled her eyes as she looked at the little girl. “Katie, you already have a mommy.”
“No, I don’t. I don’t know her, and I don’t miss her. It’s weird, but everyone knows what it’s like to love a mommy and when they tell me what it feels like, I think of you. Always. You take care of me. When I’m sick, you read to me. When I’m not sick you cook food for me. You love me, don’t you, Ann?”
“Yes, of course I love you. I’ll never stop loving you.” She held her arms open and Katie threw herself into them.
“Katie, sweetie, you need to go and get ready for bed,” Eli said, startling the two of them.
They pulled apart and Ann got to her feet.
“Daddy, you forgot to pick me up,” Katie said, running toward her dad. She threw her arms around him.
“I know, honey, and I won’t do it again. There were a few things I had to do.”
“You did, like what?”
“When you’re older, you’ll find out.”
“I am always waiting to find out. No one will ever tell me anything. I’m old enough to know. I’m going to be six soon and I will have to know everything. I’m a big girl for my age.”
Ann smiled as Katie went to her room.
They were in her house but she already had a room for Katie.
“I stopped by Elizabeth’s place. She told me you already walked the dogs.”
“I did. I only remembered after I was driving Katie home.”
“Thank you for picking her up.”
“No problem. You know I love Katie. Erm, about what you heard…”
“My daughter loves you like a mother, Ann.”
“I don’t encourage it.” Damn, this was breaking her heart.
“You should,” he said.
“What?”
She expected him to shout at her, to curse, to tell her she had no right being part of his family, and the sooner she got it through her thick skull, the better.
“I’m not really very good at any of this,” Eli said. “You’re pregnant and I don’t want you to get rid of the baby.”
“You don’t?” she asked. “You asked me what I wanted to do.”
“Because I didn’t know how to tell you that I love you.”
She opened her mouth, closed it. “I’m sorry. There’s no way I heard that right.”
“You heard it and you know you did.”
“You just told me that you loved me.”
“I did. Do you want me to tell you again?” he asked.
“You can’t love me.”
“I do.”
“But, why did you run out? Is this because of the baby? Are you doing the right thing because I’m pregnant, is that it? You don’t have to do something like that. This doesn’t have to change our lives like that.”
“But you see, it does. This is going to change our lives and what’s more, I want it to.” Eli rushed toward her, cupping her face. “I was angry you were pregnant but not because of the reason you think.”
“Now you know how I think?”
“I wanted to tell you that I loved you before you were pregnant. This, the way I feel.” He took her hand, placing it over his heart. “This is real. All of it. I love you, Ann. More than anything else in the world. I want to have a family with you. Grow old with a bunch of kids. I want forever with you, but I felt like a fucking fool bec
ause you were holding that test, and I hadn’t told you already. I’d spent more time mocking this fucking house gift than seeing what is the truth.”
“What’s the truth?”
“These houses, they’re a gift, but they don’t bring people together. It’s the people in them who finally give themselves a chance to see and to be happy. I love you, Ann. I took a chance, and I saw you, and I loved every single part of you. Even the note-taking and keeping every little scrap of leftovers.”
“It’s the college student in me.”
“Yeah, well, I love it. I want you in my life, as my wife. I want to raise our kids together. To get a chance on everything I missed out on.” He lowered himself to one knee, opening up the box in his hands. She hadn’t even seen him get it out of his pocket.
“Ann Adams, please, do me the honor of becoming my wife,” he said.
She opened her mouth and closed it. “You’re sure? Like, really, one hundred percent sure?”
“Do you want me to go and tell every single one of our neighbors how sure I am?” he asked.
“Yes.”
He got to his feet, about to leave, and she grabbed his arm, laughing. “No, I don’t mean to go and talk to our neighbors. I was saying yes. As in, yes, I’ll marry you. Yes, I want to spend the rest of my life with you, because I do love you, Eli. Workaholic that you are, leaving the toilet seat up, and being just a little possessive.”
“But I will always love you. That I can promise you.” He pulled her close, kissing her.
This was meant to be, she knew it right deep in her soul.
****
One month later
“You have to check everywhere for bugs. They come down in their ships, but they don’t always do that. They have these cars and they can just plant them on the side of your house and they walk around, and it’s just scary, and you have to just live with it.”
Eli listened as Mr. Graves handed him a device for him to take wherever he wanted or needed to go. This was new to him.
He thanked him for it and watched as he took his seat in the garden.
He and Ann decided on a small wedding, in his back yard. She only had a couple of friends, as did he. He didn’t bring work to it, but his family was present, Mr. Graves, his parents, Elizabeth, and a few neighbors, but that was it.