He snapped his head forward and gave a sober smile to Clay, who stood just outside the back door of the house. “At least the sun is shining,” Clay offered.
“Yeah, it’s a beautiful day,” Tony agreed. Once again he looked toward the cemetery. “It somehow seems fitting that she’d wind up here. Cass was so good about taking in troubled souls.”
Clay’s blue eyes darkened. “I still miss her.”
“Yeah, me, too,” Tony admitted. He laughed suddenly. “All I have to say is that Amy better not misbehave in Heaven. Cass will twist her ears back, snap that bullwhip of hers and scare the daylights out of Amy.”
Clay chuckled. “You’ve got that right.”
Tony checked his wristwatch. They had set the time of the funeral for noon and afterward Cookie would have a meal for everyone in the cowboy dining room. It was now just a little after eleven thirty.
“Here come the rest of the men,” Clay said.
Tony turned around to see the rest of the cowboys heading up the hill. They looked like a band of brothers clad in their black suit jackets and blue jeans, and a lump rose in the back of Tony’s throat.
He hadn’t asked any of them to attend the funeral. He hadn’t expected any of them to come. But here they were, lending their support and prayers for a woman most of them hadn’t even personally known.
Each of them greeted Tony with a clap on the back and somber smiles. “I didn’t expect you all to be here,” he said around the lump in his throat.
“Why wouldn’t we be?” Adam replied. “When one of us hurts, all of us hurt.”
They turned at the sound of gravel crunching under car tires. Reverend Donaldson’s red compact car pulled down the driveway and parked.
The old man got out of the car, his silver hair shining in the late-morning sunshine. He carried a small Bible and greeted Tony with a soft smile.
“Thank you for coming on such short notice, Reverend,” Tony said and shook his hand.
He looked around at all the other men. “It seems the only time I see most of you is either at weddings or at funerals,” he chided gently. “It would be nice to see you occasionally in church on Sunday mornings.”
The men coughed, scuffed their feet on the ground and mumbled excuses about Sundays and church and ranch work. Tony might have laughed if at that moment the back door hadn’t opened and the women came outside.
Tony drank in the sight of Mary holding a sleeping Joey. She was dressed in dark slacks, a white blouse and a lightweight black jacket. Joey was nestled against her chest in a warm sleeper and his blue blanket.
Cassie was also dressed appropriately for the somber occasion. Halena was dressed for a party in a bright red beaded skirt, an orange-and-red flowered blouse and red sparkly earrings dangling down to her shoulders.
“The rest of you can wear your mourning black and be sad, but as far as I’m concerned it’s a day of celebration. Amy is going home with the Lord,” she exclaimed.
“Amen,” Reverend Donaldson replied. “Are we expecting anyone else to come?”
Sadness swept through Tony at the fact that Amy would be mourned by two women from her childhood and a man who had briefly dated her and nobody else. “I think this is it,” Tony replied. “We can go ahead and get started.”
He walked over to Mary. “Want me to carry Joey?”
“No, I’ve got him,” she replied. Her gaze was soft and she offered him a sad smile. “Let’s just say our final goodbyes to Amy.”
Fifteen minutes later they all stood in a group just in front of the casket. It was rare that all of the cowboys were together and silence reigned, but everyone was quiet as they waited for Reverend Donaldson to speak. Tony had told the man as much as he could in an effort to give Amy a respectable eulogy.
“She was a child of God, but a troubled one,” the reverend began. “She brought laughter and she brought tears to those around her...”
As Reverend Donaldson continued to speak, Tony looked over to Mary and the child she held in her arms. Amy’s boy. His boy. Memories of Amy exploded in his head. He’d met her at the Watering Hole on one of the rare nights when he’d gone with the other men to the bar.
She’d been a bright and shiny diamond on the dance floor and he’d been surprised when she’d grabbed him off a stool to dance with her.
They’d dated for two months before she’d moved to Oklahoma City and then they’d continued to see each other for two more months after that. She always drove to Bitterroot for their time together. He’d never seen where she was living in the city.
Now he knew she must have been living with Ash. With Amy’s addiction and other issues she would have been drawn to a man like him. He would have been far more exciting than Tony.
When they’d split up, he hadn’t given her another thought. She’d simply become a part of his past, and he’d never looked back.
No, he hadn’t been in love with Amy, but he still grieved for her and for the sadness of her life and for the little boy she would never see grow to a man.
He focused back to the here and now and listened as Reverend Donaldson read several passages from the Bible. Tony glanced over to Mary, who had tears shining in her eyes as she looked at the casket. Halena had her eyes closed and her head bowed. They were both mourning the young girl they had known...the woman they had tried to save.
“Ashes to ashes, dust to dust...” Reverend Donaldson said.
Joey let out a loud mournful wail.
Tears blurred Tony’s vision. It was as if the little boy mourned the fact that he no longer had a mother.
* * *
The sober mood of the funeral lifted as everyone gathered in the cowboy dining room for the noon meal. Cookie provided cold cuts for sandwiches, potato salad and chips and several salad options. There were huge chocolate chip cookies for dessert.
Mary was glad that Amy was finally at peace, but she ached for Joey. Amy had brought him to Tony out of love. She’d obviously known the danger she was in. She’d made the ultimate sacrifice in giving up her son to save his life. She hoped one day Joey would know that about his mother.
“Let me hold him and you go get something to eat,” Tony said when they entered the dining room.
She relinquished the now happy baby to his father’s arms and then she and Halena got into the food line. “Are you okay?” Halena asked her.
“I’m fine,” she replied. “I’m glad this is over. We were so worried about her and now we don’t have to worry any longer.”
“Hopefully Ash Moreland will be arrested and then we definitely have no more worries,” Halena replied. “Hmm, ambrosia salad. I love that stuff.”
The two of them filled their plates and then went to the table where Tony sat with Joey. Cassie joined them along with Sawyer and Flint.
It wasn’t long before life filled the room and removed the pall of the funeral. Sawyer held Joey while Tony went to get his plate of food.
They all filled their bellies and then several of the men moved the tables to the sides of the room and Mac got out his guitar.
“We said our goodbyes to Amy and now we celebrate life,” Cassie said.
As if on cue, Mac started a rousing song that quickly had the men clapping their hands. “May I have this dance?” Clay asked Cassie.
The two of them began two-stepping across the floor. Everyone laughed as Jerod pulled up Flint and the two men hoofed it to the music.
Halena looked pointedly at Sawyer. He shot a frantic glance at Mary, who laughed as Halena grabbed him by the arm and yanked him onto the floor.
Tony grinned and patty-caked Joey’s hands together in rhythm to the music while Mary’s heart suddenly squeezed tight with a new impending grief. She was counting down the days to goodbye. The laughter and the fun and Tony holding Joey only made the coming goodb
ye that much more difficult.
At least you’ll have memories. There would be many lonely nights ahead when all she would have were the memories of Joey’s sweet snuggles against her and the wonder of his goofy, drooling grins.
At least you’ll have memories. In the quiet before sleep she would remember Tony’s scent, the way his smiles warmed her from head to toe. She would always have the memory of his body against hers and his kisses that torched a fire in her.
The memories would have to be enough. However, the picture of Tony laughing with Joey made her ache with the desire to belong to them.
“Mary, would you like to dance?” Adam asked.
“Sure.” She got up from the bench, hoping that she could lose herself in the music instead of dwelling on the thoughts in her head.
The afternoon wore on and Mary danced with all of the cowboys, as did Cassie and Halena. When Mac took a break, Mary collapsed onto the bench next to Tony.
“I don’t think I’ve ever danced this much in my entire life,” she said half-breathlessly.
“You’re a good partner. I saw that you easily maneuvered around Sawyer’s three feet,” he said in amusement.
She laughed. Sawyer might be handsome, but he definitely wasn’t particularly graceful on the dance floor. “At least he didn’t step on my toes.”
“That’s because you moved too fast.”
“It doesn’t look like Joey is going to move too fast too soon,” she said as she gazed at the sleeping boy.
Tony patted him on the back. “It’s a good thing he can sleep no matter what the noise level around him, but before the fun is over I’d like to have a dance with you.”
Her heart stutter-stepped in her chest. “That would be fun,” she said lightly. “Then I can say that I danced with every one of the Holiday cowboys.”
He got his opportunity when Mac began playing again and Tony transferred Joey to Halena’s lap. As he took Mary into his arms, she tried to still the frantic beat of her heart.
Even though the music was quick and lively, his hand was hot on her waist and his gaze was dark and hungry and the dance felt intimate and dangerous.
She was grateful when it ended and he released his hold on her. “I think I’m ready to call it a day,” she said when they returned to the table.
It was after three when Jerod and Tony walked with the women back to the house. Halena and Cassie flew into the house with plans to make an elaborate evening meal despite the lunch they’d had.
Jerod was on house duty and decided to walk the perimeter of the house while Tony and Mary lingered just outside the back door.
Mary held Joey and smiled at Tony. “Amy would have been pleased that we all danced and had a good time today,” she said.
He returned her smile. “Yeah, I think she would have liked the send-off,” he agreed. He looked over toward the cemetery in the distance. “At least with her here I can take Joey to visit her occasionally when he gets old enough.”
“You’ll tell him that she loved him?” She stroked his downy dark hair.
“Absolutely. I’ll tell him about her laughter and the sparkle in her eyes. I’ll tell him all the good things and none of the bad.”
Mary nodded. “Good.”
“Mary, I don’t care that you can’t have children.”
The words hung in the air.
“You already told me that,” she replied stiffly.
“I just thought it might be a good time to remind you.” There was a lightness in his voice, but the dark want in his eyes belied his tone.
“It’s been a long day, Tony,” she said wearily. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
She turned and walked away from him, knowing that his gaze remained on her until she got inside the house and he could no longer see her.
Cassie and Halena were in the kitchen bustling around and Mary scooted through to the great room, where Joey’s bouncy chair awaited him.
She placed him in the chair and then sank down on the sofa. She’d never felt as weary and as fragile as she did at this moment. Today had been a reminder that tomorrow wasn’t promised. Anything could happen and suddenly your life would be over. If she died tomorrow, she’d take with her so many regrets, but they were regrets she couldn’t fix.
The last thing she wanted was to walk away from Tony with a vision of revulsion on his face. She much preferred to walk away strong and proud with the memory of his love for her shining from his eyes.
* * *
“We ride tonight.” The old garage smelled of gas and grease and stale cigarette smoke. The walls were spray-painted with obscene graffiti, but Ash didn’t mind the surroundings. Before him were four of his most trusted men. They were mean, amoral men who would do anything Ash told them to do.
“It shouldn’t be too hard to take out a couple of dumb cowboys,” Champ Waldron said as he squeezed an empty beer can and tossed it into a corner.
“I could use a little target practice.” Jake the Snake sat on his lowrider and pointed his sawed-off shotgun around the room.
“Put that damned thing away,” George snarled as he grabbed another beer from the cooler. “What time do you want this all to go down?”
“Let’s meet back here at midnight,” Ash replied. “It will be about an hour’s drive to Bitterroot and at one in the morning all the men on the ranch should be sound asleep.”
For the next half hour Ash explained his plans for the night and the layout of the Holiday ranch. When he was finished, the men left, but he knew they’d be back at midnight...the witching hour.
Ash grabbed himself a beer and sat on an old metal folding chair. He was too hot to stay in Oklahoma City when this was finished. Thankfully, he had plenty of money and several fake identifications to start a new life someplace else.
He’d been hearing reports that Florida had a big heroin problem. Sun and beach and a new business to grow, it definitely sounded like a plan.
And tonight he would get his son, the heir to Ash’s business dealings. He cracked open the beer and took a long draw, then leaned back with a satisfied smile.
The men on the ranch would never know what hit them. He and his men would go in hard and fast. Ash would take what was his and then Ash Moreland and his son would disappear forever.
Chapter 15
Dinner consisted of beef Wellington, a cranberry salad, homemade rolls, a cream-cheese green-bean casserole and renewed heartache.
It was almost eight when the three women sat down to eat and Mary had been unable to get Tony out of her head no matter how hard she tried.
He doesn’t care that I can’t have children. Mary laughed as Halena said something outrageous. We could adopt and fill a home with love. The meal was utterly tasteless because Tony’s words whirled around and around in her head.
But he would never be okay with her deformity. He’d run like Rick had and she just couldn’t go through that kind of a trauma again. It was far better that he think she didn’t love him. Eventually he’d get over her, but she had a feeling it would take a very long time for her to forget him.
“Granddaughter, food is meant to be eaten, not shoved around from place to place on your plate,” Halena chided. “Cassie and I slaved over this glorious meal.”
Mary flushed. “I’m sorry, I’m just not very hungry this evening. I ate so much at lunch. Besides, I saw the chocolate cake on the counter and you know that’s my favorite. I don’t want to get so full that I can’t enjoy a huge piece of cake.”
“And ice cream,” Cassie added.
“And maybe a movie later?” Halena asked.
Cassie gave the old woman an affectionate grin. “And a movie later,” she agreed.
Mary tried to stay focused through the rest of the meal and when she helped with the cleanup, but thoughts of Tony ke
pt intruding.
After the cake and the ice cream had been eaten and they were all seated in the great room to watch the movie, the action on the big-screen television couldn’t compete with the thoughts going around in Mary’s head.
What kind of cruel fate had blown Tony into her life? How wicked was it to bring into her life a man she loved, a man she could never claim as her own?
It was time to say goodbye. Tony would care for Joey until he got them into an apartment or a house. She was no longer needed here.
She gazed down at Joey, who grinned back at her, and her heart wept knowing that she wouldn’t see the baby again. She would no longer stand over his crib and watch him sleep. She wouldn’t see his happy glee as he sucked on his bottle, or his delight when she carried on long conversations with him.
Tomorrow she and Halena would return to the house and get on with their ordinary lives and put all these extraordinary events behind them.
The boy and the man who had woven baskets of love in her heart would be forever banished, except perhaps in her deepest dreams.
It was almost eleven o’clock when she and Halena climbed the stairs for bed. The late meal and the movie had made it a long night. Mary put Joey down in his crib and then went into the room across the hall, where Halena had been sleeping.
The room held two twin beds and Halena sat on the foot of one of them with a red sparkly turban on her head. She reached up and touched it and preened. “A new gift from Cassie.”
“Are you going to sleep in it?”
“I think if I wear it to bed I might dream-walk to a sparkly place.”
“Tonight you dream-walk to someplace magical and tomorrow we go home.”
Halena frowned. “The four of us?”
Mary shook her head. “No, just you and me.”
Halena’s frown deepened. “And so you won’t give Tony Nakni a chance. He loves you, Mary.”
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