by Harley Wylde
“What does it matter what I want?” I asked. “I’m just a stray who won’t go away. I’m not anyone to any of you, Cinder. You made it clear that kissing me was a mistake you don’t want to repeat.”
I didn’t know where I’d found the courage to say that, but it felt freeing. He smiled faintly for a moment, probably just as surprised by my outburst. I was the type to follow along and not make waves, at least the Meg who survived Colombia was that person. I didn’t think I remembered how to be my old self. Of course, I’d been a kid the last time I felt freedom, so I’d be different now anyway. But I’d lost my spark, my fire. In the year and a half I’d been with the Devil’s Boneyard, I’d mostly kept to myself. I did enjoy speaking with the other women, and they’d taken me shopping here and there, but I’d spent the majority of my time here at Cinder’s house, or hiding in the place they’d provided for me.
“Meg, you’re a sweetheart, you really are. You’re also the forever type of woman, and I don’t have forever to give anyone. I don’t believe in happily ever after and all that fairy-tale shit, not when it comes to me. It seems to be working for some of the others, but a guy like me isn’t the type to settle down.”
“Because you’re a Marine?” I asked.
He raised his eyebrows and stared at me.
“The Devil Dog on your arm. You were in the Marines at some point. My friend’s dad always said once a Marine, always a Marine.”
“You know what a Devil Dog is?” he asked. “Most people just generally refer to it as the Marine dog or mascot.”
I shrugged. “I don’t know all the details about being a Marine or anything, but I listened whenever my friend’s dad talked about being a Marine. It seemed interesting to a teen girl, and he was a hero to me.”
“I’m no one’s hero, Meg, so don’t even go there.”
“You’re mine,” I said softly. “You could have thrown me out, or left me in Colombia, but you didn’t. And don’t tell me it’s because of Jordan. I know she wanted to bring us here, but you didn’t have to give in to her. Everyone else acts like she’s a ticking time bomb or something, but I know you aren’t afraid of her.”
“No, I’m not. Her daughter is another matter. But Jordan is amusing and a general pain in my ass, and seeing her try to kick the shit out of men three times her size always gives me a good laugh. She’s an evil little shit when it comes to protecting her family, though, and I’m glad she’s on our side. I’d been toying with the man who knew Havoc’s whereabouts, not wanting to kill him before I’d extracted what I could, but I wasn’t moving fast enough for Jordan. I’d gleaned a little info, but I wanted more than just Havoc’s location. I never conveyed that to Jordan, or anyone else, and she decided to take matters into her own hands, and while she found out exactly what happened to her man, I wasn’t able to discover if we would have a bigger problem on our hands in the future.”
“Ticking time bomb,” I said. “I think it fits.”
“So does demonic little shit,” he said with a laugh.
“Have you narrowed down who might be snitching on the club?” I asked.
“No, but it’s obviously not anyone with a woman and kids. And it’s not Shade because he brought the matter to my attention. I’d hate to think any of the patched members were responsible for leaking pictures and details of our family to those sick sons of bitches, but I can’t rule anything out right now.”
“They’re not taking me,” I said, knowing that I wouldn’t go with them willingly. I’d do whatever it took to avoid that fate again. Anything.
“I won’t let them near you, Meg.”
“That’s not what I meant.” I looked away, not wanting to confess that I’d kill myself before I went back to that type of life. It wasn’t a life at all, just one day of horror and misery after another, and the likelihood I’d be rescued a second time was slim to none.
“Sweetheart, look at me.”
I refused and turned my head farther away.
Cinder gripped my chin and forced me to meet his gaze. He just stared at me, and I didn’t know what to think or say. Slowly, he leaned closer and pressed his lips to mine. Surprise was my first response, but then the feel of his lips on mine had me melting. He might be this big, gruff biker, the President of Devil’s Boneyard and feared by most people, but he would always be the man who’d saved me, who protected me. I could admit a slight case of hero worship when it came to Cinder.
“I thought kissing me was a mistake,” I murmured.
“I already walk on the wrong side of the law. If I’m going to hell, I might as well do something enjoyable to earn my place.”
I blinked at him. “Kissing me is going to send you to hell?”
“No. The thoughts I have when I kiss you will send me there.” He smiled faintly. “I’m no good for you, Meg. You deserve so much better than an old man like me, but now that I’ve had a taste, I can’t seem to keep my distance. I’m trying to do the right thing, but I don’t know that I can resist for long.”
“Maybe I don’t want you to,” I said.
“What are you saying, Meg? And you’d better be really clear right now. I don’t want to start something only to scare you and send you running. The safest place for you is under this roof, and if I need to keep away from you, then I will. It won’t be easy, but I’ll do it.”
“I’m saying that I want you. When you kiss me, I feel all warm and tingly. I’ve never given myself to anyone willingly, Vincent, but I want to. I want you to be the one who shows me that what happens between a man and a woman isn’t something to fear and doesn’t always cause pain.”
“That’s a tall order,” he said.
“I’m sure you’re up for the challenge,” I teased, then sobered. I didn’t know who this new Meg was who was starting to emerge, and it scared me and felt liberating at the same time.
“Oh, I’m up all right,” he said.
I snorted, then giggled. Giggled! I couldn’t remember the last time I’d done something like that. Even after all my time at the compound, I’d never truly relaxed and enjoyed myself. Not until tonight. Not until the man holding me turned my world upside down with a kiss.
“Are you sure that’s what you want, Meg?” he asked.
“I’m sure. No one’s ever made me feel the way you do. I know you won’t hurt me. I trust you, Vincent, more than I trust anyone.”
“You get scared at any point or want to stop, you tell me. I don’t care how far along we are, I’ll back off the second you need me to,” he said.
“Like I said. I know I can trust you.” I cupped his cheek. “You’re a good man, even though you try really hard to pretend otherwise.”
“You deserve a nice dinner, candlelight, and romantic music. Something. Anything other than what I can offer you tonight,” he said.
“No. All I want and need is you. I don’t need any fancy extras to make this moment special.”
He studied me a moment, then stood with me in his arms and started walking toward the back of the house. When he entered his bedroom, he kicked the door shut and carried me over to the bed. He eased me down, then took a step back. I didn’t want him second-guessing this moment or trying to back out. I’d been naked in front of men plenty of times, but the only one who mattered was this one. Reaching for the hem of my shirt, I slowly eased it over my head and tossed it aside. His gaze locked on my breasts. I loved the hunger etched on his face, the raw need. I shimmied out of my panties and tried to fight the tremor that was making my hands shake. I did trust him, more than I’d trusted anyone in a long time, but I was still nervous.
A groan rumbled from deep in his chest and he fisted his hands, almost as if he was trying to keep from reaching out to me. I swallowed hard as he removed his clothes and I got to see him completely naked for the first time. He was already hard, his cock fully erect and pre-cum gathering on the tip. He wasn’t big enough that I worried it would hurt, but he was far from small. There was no way I’d be able to wrap my hand all the way
around him. Perfect, that was the best word to use. Cinder was perfect in every way.
“We can stop right here and now,” he said, catching my attention. My gaze locked with his and I shook my head.
“Don’t stop.” If he backed off now, I might never get the courage to do this again. I certainly wouldn’t ask him after being rejected twice, and I had a hard time picturing myself with anyone else. Being vulnerable in front of a man wasn’t easy.
“There are things you should know,” he said. “I can be a bit rough in the bedroom, and I prefer to tie my women up. I don’t know if you can handle that Meg.”
I swallowed hard, but the fear I’d thought would come stayed at bay. Deep down, I knew that he wouldn’t hurt me, that if I let him tie me up that he would only give me pleasure. “I’m all right with that,” I said.
He approached the bed and I slid back a little, then reclined on my elbows. Cinder ran his hands up my thighs and I noticed his heart was pounding as hard as mine was, the telling thumps noticeable in his broad chest. The look he gave me was reverent. His body covered mine as he leaned across the bed, bracing his weight on his hands on either side of me.
“I like seeing you sprawled across my bed, ready and willing. More than I should.”
Cinder kissed me slowly, the heat and weight of his body pressing against me. I wrapped my hand around the back of his neck, wanting to hold him close a while longer. It felt like we kissed forever before he moved farther down my body. I felt the rasp of his beard along my neck, then between my breasts. I shivered as my body responded, my pussy getting wetter and my nipples harder. It was both frightening and exciting. His lips closed over my nipple, his teeth lightly grazing the hard peak. I couldn’t contain my whimpers and cries as my body heated even more. It felt like little zaps of pleasure were going straight from my breasts to my clit as he teased one side, then the other.
He tightened his hand on my hip as his tongue slid across my nipple again. He bit down gently and I cried out, my body bucking underneath him. Everything felt so good, and I wanted more. I wished this moment could last forever.
He started to move farther down my body, but I placed a hand on his shoulder.
“Wait. We forgot something.”
“What?” he asked, looking up at me.
“I don’t think I can have children since I never conceived in Colombia, and the club doctor tested me and said I’m clean.”
“Are you asking me to take you bare?” he asked. “Because I’ve never fucked a woman without a condom.”
“If you want to use one, I understand,” I said.
Cinder moved back up over me until we were eye to eye. “I haven’t been with anyone in about six months, and I got tested after being with her. I’m clean.”
“Then… no condoms?” I asked.
He hesitated and I squeezed his arm, understanding completely why he might not want to take the chance. I honestly didn’t think I could get pregnant, but if a man like him ever had children, he wouldn’t want it to be with someone like me. He might claim not to be the forever kind of guy, but I knew the truth. It was that he didn’t want forever with me, and that was fine. I’d take all the happy memories I could make with him and I would cherish them always. I already knew I was probably too broken to have a normal life, be the other half of someone, a partner in all ways.
“We can use one,” I said. “It’s fine. I don’t mind.”
“Meg, it’s not that I don’t trust you.”
“But you don’t, and it’s okay. A man in your position can’t be too careful, right? You’re smart to always use one.”
He kissed me again, then I felt his hand wrap around my wrist. I gaped as a cuff was attached to me, then he did the same to the other side. I tugged at them and realized I couldn’t break free. Staring up at him, I could tell he was waiting for me to freak out, but I wouldn’t. I gave him a nod so he’d know I was okay.
“Why do you have these if you don’t bring women here?” I asked, the question slipping past my lips before I could recall them.
“When I bought this bed, Scratch thought it would be damn funny to hang the cuffs off the headboard. He tossed the key, some condoms, and a bunch of other crap into the bedside table drawer, but I’ve never had a woman in my bed until now.”
Cinder pinched my nipples again, twisting and tugging on them. I moaned and thrashed as much as my body could while shackled to his bed. He leaned down and bit, not hard enough to break the skin, but the sharp sting of pain did something I’d never expected. It was like an overload of pleasure, my clit pulsing, and then I was coming. My thighs trembled as he switched to the other breast. His beard scraped against my tender skin as he lapped at the hard peak. The moment he bit down again, he swiped across my clit with his fingers, and I screamed, I came so hard. Before I could even come down from my high, his body covered mine and he slowly pushed inside of me, completely bare. I gasped and my eyes went wide as I stared up at him. I got a slow, sexy smile out of him before he started moving.
“Some rules are made to be broken,” he said. “If I was ever going to break that one, it would be with you, Meg.”
My heart felt full to bursting in that moment. It meant the world to me, having this man’s trust. I hoped that I never gave him cause to doubt me. I would die for Cinder, if it ever came to that. He’d given me a chance at a new life when he could have left me behind. I’d always be grateful, and some small part of me would always love him for all he’d done.
I gripped his hips with my thighs as he stroked in and out of me, slowly as if he were savoring the moment. It felt amazing, better than anything I’d experienced before. He shifted and every thrust had him brushing against my clit. Little sparks of pleasure shot through me and it didn’t take long before I was coming. I bit my lip to keep from screaming out his name this time, and I felt a gush of moisture between my legs. My cheeks warmed as I felt my release soak the bed under me, but it just seemed to turn him on even more. His eyes flared with heat as he took me harder, faster. Every flex of his hips drove him into me. The bed shook underneath us as he powered into me, slamming his cock deep with every stroke. It was a thorough fucking, with no other way to describe it. The orgasm turned into another one, and as my body trembled from the force of one more release, I felt the hot splash of his cum inside of me.
Cinder thrust a few more times, then groaned as his body went taut and he stilled. I felt the pulse of his cock and wished we could stay like this a while longer. It was nice, feeling connected to him, even if only for a little bit.
“If I were younger, I’d say give me twenty minutes and I’ll improve on that,” he said as he uncuffed me, then rolled to the side.
I didn’t know the protocol for what happened after. Before, I’d either been passed off to someone else or just kicked out into the hall. This was different, though. Was I supposed to go back to my room now? Did he want me to stay? Was once all he wanted from me? As if sensing my thoughts, he reached for me, pulling me tight against his side.
“You don’t need to improve on anything,” I said.
He chuckled, then groaned. “Christ, Meg. Just proves how innocent you are despite everything. Trust me, I owe you a do-over. I should have been gentle, not fucked you so damn hard.”
“Oh.” I was quiet a moment. “Does that mean we’re going to do it again?”
I wasn’t opposed to the idea. In fact, I was all for it.
He laughed again, the bed shaking from his mirth. “Yeah, sweetheart. We’ll do it again, just not any time soon. I’m too damn old to get hard again that fast. Give me an hour or two.”
I cuddled against him, content and happier than I’d been in forever. He might have thought what we’d just shared was lacking, but to me it was wonderful. I couldn’t imagine it getting any better. Not just because he’d made me come multiple times, but because of who I’d shared the experience with.
“Sorry about your bed. I’ve never done that before,” I said.
�
��That definitely isn’t something to apologize for. Hell, I hope it happens again. Do you have any idea how fucking hot it is that I made you come that hard? Makes me want to beat my chest or some other caveman-type shit.”
I smiled and pressed a kiss to his chest. “It’s a rather impressive chest.”
“You’re good for an old man’s ego, sweet girl.”
“Not old,” I said. Maybe if I said it often enough, he’d eventually believe me. I knew he was a lot older than me, and the oldest member of the club, but I didn’t care. Men my age and younger had hurt me horribly, so age was just a number and didn’t mean a damn thing when it came to what a man was made of. Cinder had always been kind. Even when he’d barked at me about leaving his house there hadn’t been any real heat behind his words, and now I knew that he’d just sent me away because of how I affected him.
As I cuddled next to him, his arm around me, I knew without a doubt that I could easily fall in love with Cinder. I might already be a little in love with him. I knew we could never work, that he wouldn’t love me in return, but for the first time in ten years, I wanted something other than my freedom. I wanted the man lying next to me to ask me to stay, to be his. It would never happen, and I was doomed to have a broken heart, but it didn’t stop me from wishing it were possible.
Chapter Five
Cinder
What the hell had I done? Meg murmured something in her sleep as she pressed as tightly to me as she could. I’d promised myself I would keep my distance, not touch her, and I’d gone and fucked her. I knew it wasn’t going anywhere, couldn’t, but when she’d asked me I hadn’t been able to say no. Meg had never asked for a damn thing as long as she’d been here. Clothes and essentials had practically been forced upon her because she didn’t want to put anyone out. Of all the requests she could have made, this wasn’t one I’d anticipated.