Mid-Life Crisis Diaries

by Geraldine Solon

  She remembered once when they were flying to Hawaii, she was especially nervous. Blake had gone through the whole ritual with her…arriving early enough to eat an actual meal at the airport before they left, even if it was only a sandwich from a vending machine. They sat about the same distance from the gate, which was some strange request she’d come up with on a flight out of the country once. Everything was going as it usually did, but for some reason she was very uneasy. So Blake excused himself to go to the bathroom, and snuck over to the convenience store in the airport and bought her a cheap, fake sparkly necklace. It was the sweetest thing he had ever done up to that point. And had done since, now that she thought about it. The memory that she had completely forgotten about caused a lump to crawl up into the back of her throat, and tears threatened the corners of her eyes. She swallowed hard, and decided to sit quietly and ignore her pre-flight jitters.

  She concentrated instead on where she was going. She hadn’t even looked up any information on the internet on Puerto Vallarta before she left. She wanted to be surprised, and if she was going to have the shell-shock of a new, handsome, young escort for the whole trip, she wanted to be shocked with her actual surroundings, as well. It would be like a good, hard drink, and she would take it all in at once. Hopefully she’d be drunk on the whole situation within the day. When was the last time she ever had fun? Dr. Lee had asked her that question before she left. But Marsha found it difficult to spend one month with no schedule, no patients to counsel and left alone, no Blake.

  ***

  A light breeze brushed through Marsha’s hair as she stood by the patio overlooking the ocean. The waves crashing to the shore was all she could hear. Dr. Lee had booked her in a two-bedroom condo and Marsha couldn’t deny this was a sanctuary of escape. She had two days before she would meet Andre.

  Perhaps getting acquainted with the town would come in handy. She dug in her purse and pulled out a pen and notepad, ready to write down a list then decided against it, reminding herself she’s here to have fun. No schedule.

  With a straw hat, Marsha followed the stairway that led her to the main beach. She watched beautiful women with sexy bikinis sunbathing on the sand with their men beside them. Marsha sighed. This is a lover’s paradise.

  Pushing her thoughts aside, Marsha continued to walk, admiring the turquoise water. A man handed her a map.

  “Thank you.” She studied the area.

  “You have an hour till you catch the sunset.” He pointed to the far right.

  “Thanks.” She followed his gaze then looked at the map.

  Marsha strolled around art shops and galleries, admiring various sculptures on the sand along the way. Wherever she went, everyone greeted her with a smile.

  In between shops, Marsha appreciated the sand between her toes and was comforted when it soothed her nerves. She ended the day sipping a Margarita, enjoying the glorious sunset, hoping tomorrow would be a better day. Perhaps Dr. Lee was right, there’s something about Mexico that calms me.

  C H A P T E R 7

  Marsha jumped out of bed and glanced at the clock. “Oh no! I can’t believe it’s noon.” She couldn’t remember the last time she woke up at that time. The satin sheets and cool room must have allowed her to sleep that late. It was the first time she slept straight through after Blake left.

  Back in San Francisco, she’d be awake by six, powering her morning with a strong brewed coffee after a shower followed by slipping on her suit and pearls. She had no time to style her hair. But today, she realized, she could laze around in bed, stretch her arms and perhaps watch the sunset again.

  She decided to call Dr. Lee, who left two voicemails.

  “Marsha, I was worried about you.”

  “Worried? You’re the one who sent me here, remember?”

  “Yeah, but when you didn’t answer, I thought you took the next plane back home.”

  Marsha grinned. “I overslept. I wouldn’t break our agreement. Besides, Puerto Vallarta’s working its charm on me.”

  “Good to hear. Are you ready for your meeting with Andre tomorrow?”

  Marsha turned on the TV and searched for an English channel. For a moment, she had forgotten she was supposed to meet Andre, but like Dr. Lee said, she had nothing to lose. “Right, I sure am.”

  “You sound quite chirpy,” Dr. Lee said. “I can assure you we’ve done a background check on him. He has no criminal record and no STDs.”

  Marsha almost choked in between her coughs. “What makes you think I’m going to sleep with him? I’m only here for a month—I didn’t even sleep with Blake till after six months of dating.”

  Dr. Lee sighed. “Marsha, dear, the last two things you should think of are Blake and rules. You’re there to have fun.”

  “Yes, Mom.”

  Dr. Lee burst into laughter. “Don’t you come back crying. I want to see a new woman when you return.”

  “Can you please tell me what this Andre does for a living?” She pictured a beach bum who smoked weed all day with no responsibilities and hoped Andre wasn’t one of those.

  “I thought you’d never ask. He has his own real estate company and quite a catch if you ask me. I only chose the best for you.”

  “Wow. He’s already successful at such a young age. What is he going to get out of this? You never told me what the prize is for him.”

  Dr. Lee laughed. “Silly, you are his prize.”

  Marsha rose from the bed and pushed the curtain aside. Light spilled inside the room, reminding her of another beautiful day that awaits her. She honestly didn’t care why Andre would be here. She was becoming more and more comfortable with the idea that she was just here to exist for a month. Nothing more, nothing less. Her job was to stay alive and have a good time. No…to enjoy herself. Whatever Andre was going to get out his time with her, Marsha couldn’t care less when she looked out the window. Suddenly, a bit of sun sounded like a great idea.

  Dr. Lee continued to babble on, but Marsha decided to slip into a bikini. I need to look good when I meet Andre tomorrow. “Let me call you back.”

  “Okay, keep me posted.”

  Marsha locked the condo and rushed down the steps towards the beach. Plopping her towel on the sand, she lay down. She scrutinized her pale skin and told herself she didn’t care how long she stayed out in the sun. I’m not facing Andre looking like a ghost.

  ***

  Marsha must have changed outfits six times the next day. After trying on shorts and jeans, she decided to wear a white sundress. It complimented her tan and hung well on her body. She also let her long hair hang loose. She slipped on her Roman sandals and paced around the room, rehearsing what she wanted to tell him. Remembering what Dr. Lee said, Marsha prepared a bag filled with a bikini, towel and tanning lotion.

  The doorbell rang and Marsha knew it was time. There’s no backing out now.

  Swallowing hard, she opened the door. A whiff of Andre’s cologne entered her nostrils and standing before her was the best looking guy she’d seen in years, dressed well and wearing a big smile. Her heart pounded and she was tempted to chew on her nail but didn’t want to make it seem like she was nervous. She studied his short-sleeved shirt that clung to his toned biceps and admired the above the knee-length shorts which exposed his hairy legs.

  “Hi Marsha,” he said in a faint Mexican accent, his eyes penetrating directly at her.

  “Hello, Andre.” She shook his hand and noticed that he was nervous.

  They paused for a moment, then Marsha broke the ice. “I’m sorry, this is kind of awkward, but do you want to come inside?” She couldn’t deny her attraction toward him. He exuded confidence and seemed much older than twenty-seven.

  He chewed on the tip of his sunglasses. “Can you swim?” He squinted one eye closed in a half smile as a coy invitation.

  Marsha followed him down the steps. “Good question, do you have a life jacket?”

  ***

  Moments later, they were both inside Andre’s Cruiser - Sea Ray 3
30 Sundancer. Marsha admired the boat and noticed how Andre took pride in keeping it sleek.

  “There’s a room downstairs where you can change,” he said.

  It was the kind of boat you would expect a suntanned sixty-year-old to have after a life of hard work and success, and there was a sexy twenty-something telling her to go downstairs and change into something more comfortable. It was almost too much to take in, and her skin tingled when she realized she was a very lucky lady.

  She nodded and strode toward that direction. The room had a bed and a state of the art sound system. There was a fridge that was sure to be fully stocked with booze. Marsha slipped into her bikini.

  When she returned, he helped her put a life-vest on.

  “While people are working, this is what you usually do on a Tuesday afternoon,” Marsha quipped.

  “Pretty much.” He started the ignition. “I have my own business and can work when I want and where I want.”

  Something about Andre made her curious about why he chose to participate in this study. Unlike her patients, she couldn’t seem to psyche him out. He had boyish features when he smiled but he acted like an older man who knew what he wanted. Marsha leaned her arms back while the boat roared. “That’s nice.”

  He swerved to the right and pressed on the gas.

  Marsha closed her eyes and fear settled in her belly.

  Andre clutched her arm and she opened her eyes. “Don’t be afraid, the water is quite calm during this time of the day. I’ll take you to a private cove where there are no tourists and we can swim.”

  Marsha nodded, surprising herself with the level of trust she gave a total stranger with her safety.

  “You don’t get to swim like this in San Francisco,” she whispered into the wind. Andre’s olive-toned skin glowed against the sun.

  “The beaches are too cold to swim.”

  “Yeah, when I was there, all everyone did was work.” He swayed the boat against the waves.

  Marsha didn’t say a word. Perhaps that’s what happened between her and Blake. All she did was work to build the private practice. He most likely felt neglected and she was too busy to even notice.

  “I’m sorry, I hope I didn’t offend you,” he said kindly.

  “No, what you said is true. We can get so caught up with work that we forget to take vacations like this.”

  He smiled. “Is this your first time in Mexico?”

  Marsha sighed. “I went to Cancun during spring break.”

  He grinned. “Like any American coed dreams off.”

  “You’re right,” she giggled.

  He slowed the speed. “And now you’re a grown woman alone on the island.”

  A horror flick movie flashed through her mind. What if Andre decided to kill her? Nobody but Dr. Lee knew where she was.

  “Again, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”

  She waved a hand in the air.

  “I want you to get the Puerto Vallarta experience.” He turned to the right.

  Marsha beamed in delight when she spotted a secluded cove with nobody in sight.

  “You like it, huh?” He inched the boat closer to the shore and jumped out to rest the anchor on the sand.

  “Wow! Don’t people know about this place?”

  Andre took her hand and helped her get down from the boat. “Let’s just say, it’s my secret place.”

  The water is temperate and the sand is white like sugar. “This place is amazing.”

  “I don’t think you’ll need your life vest here, unless you prefer to wear it.”

  Marsha removed the vest and hung it on the boat. “I should be fine.”

  Andre waded into the sea while Marsha trailed behind him. From where they were, they could see the view of the mountains. Peace washed upon Marsha, reminding her how nature can change your perspective.

  “I almost forgot. I brought goggles and snorkels for us.” He swam back to the boat and tossed them to Marsha.

  Marsha put on the gear and plunged underwater. A school of fish crossed her path. She spotted a variety of corals and got lost in the undersea world. How could she not appreciate the sea? Mysterious as it is, she learned water now calmed her.

  Back in the surface, Andre swam toward her. “How’s it going so far?”

  “I don’t think I’ve seen that many fishes in my life.”

  “You know, I lied to you,” he said.

  One eyebrow raised, Marsha said. “What do you mean?”

  “I bought this property and this is where I’ll build my home.”

  A breath escaped her. Marsha would never be able to afford a property like this in San Francisco. “You’re lucky to be in paradise.”

  “I can’t take all the credit. My parents started the real estate business when I was a toddler. I grew up mostly with the nanny, but now I understand how hard they worked to give me a privileged life. We traveled all the time and every moment was an adventure.”

  With no kids, Marsha and Blake could have traveled more often, but all they did was work. She was clearly missing out. “Are you the only child?”

  “Yes.”

  “I hate to ask you this question, but why is an attractive and well-rounded man like you still single?”

  He dipped his head under the water and bounced back to the surface. “Let’s say I haven’t found the one yet.”

  Tying her hair in a bun, Marsha put on her psychologist cap. “It must be difficult to find someone who likes you for who you are and not for your money.”

  His eyes settled into the water.

  “Now, it’s my turn to apologize.”

  Shaking his head, he said. “You’re right.” He faced her. “I’m not good with people.”

  “You seem to be comfortable with me.”

  He laughed. “That’s probably because you’re not from here.”

  Marsha joined in the laughter. “Trust me, I thought I had my life all figured out, until it fell apart.” Tears welled.

  Andre leaned close to her and wiped her cheek with the back of his hand.

  She felt his comfort as they gazed into each other’s eyes.

  He broke the silence and pulled her hand. “Let’s go check for more fish.”

  They spent the entire day swimming and enjoying the day.

  C H A P T E R 8

  After a day of snorkeling, both Andre and Marsha stood on top of the mountain next in line for the zip line.

  “I thought I’d take you to the mountain for a change,” Andre said.

  “You don’t have to go out of your way to take me anywhere. The beach itself is a treat for me.” She was surprised she said that considering that a few days ago, she hated the beach and the sun.

  He put the helmet on Marsha. “You look like you need a piece of adventure.”

  Was she that obvious? Was Dr. Lee trying to transform her? “What do you mean?”

  Not answering her question, he tightened her seatbelt. “The trick is not to look down.”

  The next thing Marsha knew, her body was gliding two hundred meters above with the forest surrounding her. Her heart almost jumped out from her chest and she almost puked, but then she remembered what Andre told her about not looking down.

  Upon arrival, she tried to catch her breath. She removed her helmet and paced around trying to calm her nerves. This wasn’t her type of thing. Perhaps she should just call Dr. Lee and cancel this whole thing. Andre is a nice guy, but she wasn’t an adrenaline junkie.

  Andre arrived moments later, glowing as ever. His expression changed when he saw she didn’t share the same enthusiasm. “Was it too much for you?”

  “What did you mean back there?” She asked as they strode back to his Jeep Wrangler.

  “What?” He opened the door for her.

  “That I need some kind of adventure.” She stepped inside the car. “What is so wrong with keeping things simple? I like my life, I don’t need to climb a mountain and take risks to be happy. I’m happy having a glass of wine over dinne
r. No need of extreme sports.”

  He patted her back. “I guess I was right, I’m not very good with people.”

  Shaking her head, Marsha said. “I’m sorry for lashing out at you like that. It’s not your fault. In fact, I don’t even know why I’m here.”

  Andre entered the car and started the engine. “You know what, let’s have a quiet dinner tonight so you can have your glass of wine. We don’t have to pretend to impress each other. Let’s just be ourselves. How does that sound?”

  Marsha nodded but she wasn’t sure she could continue as planned. Dr. Lee was wrong, there’s no way a trip to Puerto Vallarta would cure a broken heart. What was she thinking?

  ***

  Marsha was on her way out the door, when Dr. Lee called. “How’s everything going?”

  “It’s going.”

  “You don’t sound too happy,” Dr. Lee seemed to sense from Marsha’s tone.

  “Frankly, I don’t know why I’m here. It’s like I’m forcing the issue. Yesterday, I went zip lining and the other day snorkeling. I don’t need to do this stuff to make my life worthwhile.”

  “Wow, Marsha! What a change from San Francisco. Aren’t you glad you tried it?”

  Marsha knew if she told her she preferred to go home, Dr. Lee would insist, so instead she cut the conversation short. “Listen, I gotta go, Andre’s waiting outside.”

  “Make sure you tell me all the juicy details.”

  ***

  At the restaurant, Marsha twirled her pasta, looking into space.

  “Are you okay? You haven’t touched your food.”

  “Sorry...”

  “It helps to talk about it.”