by Bryan, JL
“What are phoenix claws?” Reese whispered when the waiter left.
“Deep-fried chicken feet in black bean sauce,” Cassidy told her, relishing again the look on Reese’s face. You’re paying for it, too, Cassidy thought, with a little smile.
“You know, you might be wrong about Peyton,” Reese said. “I think he might come around.”
“Come around to what?”
“To believing in the unseen world.”
“Don’t hold your breath. I remember you got really into church by the end of high school. Sounds like you’re still doing that.”
“You should understand better than most people,” Reese said. “After what happened that night, you know, I was looking for answers. I’m sure we all were, in our own ways.”
Cassidy thought of Barb turning to witchcraft, but she only shrugged.
“I needed to know something out there was even bigger and more powerful than...that being that was inside me,” Reese continued. “It was so powerful I could feel it tearing me apart. So I turned to religion for answers.”
“And you found them?”
“Not right away. It was a winding road. I went to my parents’ church, I went to Bible college...” Reese shook her head. “But that was where I ran into trouble.”
“Trouble?” Cassidy smiled as the dim sum arrived, smiled a little more when Reese blanched at the little plates of chicken feet and deep-fried tentacle. She beamed at the waiter. “This looks so great. For my entree, I’ll have the frog legs on lotus leaf.”
Reese shook her head and ordered steamed chicken with green vegetables, possibly the most boring item on the menu.
“So tell me how you got into trouble in Bible college.” Cassidy crunched into a chicken foot and leaned back, ready to be entertained.
“Asking questions.”
“That’ll do it. You have to try these, they’re my favorite.” Cassidy slid the octopus tentacles across to Reese, who lifted her elbows from the table as though scared the food would grab her.
“Maybe in a minute,” Reese said. “So one of the teachers was supposed to be an expert on demonic possession. He’s supposedly cast out demons, like, all over the country. I took his class on the devil, but it was mainly so I could go and talk to him about my experience. So I went to his office and started talking.”
“How did that go?”
“He didn’t know anything! I had a million questions. I wanted details. I wanted to know what the demons wanted, what they looked like in their natural form, what their own environment is like, what their names were, how specifically to deal with them if you encountered them. I wanted to know everything. And this guy just said too much knowledge was dangerous, especially for a woman.” Reese’s look of righteous outrage was so intense Cassidy almost laughed.
“I’m sorry,” Cassidy said. “Phoenix claw?”
“No, thank you. But I found videos of him on YouTube doing his exorcisms, and all he ever did was basically say ‘I cast thee out, Satan!’ and smack people on the head. I mean I don’t think he really knew anything. And then I tried talking to other teachers, and they knew even less, and they all told me to just pray and not think about demons.”
“But that didn’t work for you,” Cassidy said. She poured another cup of the sorghum liquor from the little ceramic bottle on the table. She was getting drunk and felt glad about it. No hints of the transparent critters were visible in the air around them.
“No, I needed answers! And nobody understood. So I had to think and think about it.”
Here’s where she loses her mind, Cassidy thought. She was starting to feel sorry for Reese, even if the girl had slept with her boyfriend by some bizarre and unlikely accident.
“And I started to figure it out,” Reese said. “There are these huge supernatural forces and beings out there, but they don’t care about us. They care about themselves and whatever it is they want. Nobody’s going to drop down from heaven and help you just because some huge evil thing takes over your body. No, you’re on your own. The supernatural world is just like this one—you can’t expect anyone to be there for you, because you’re so insignificant. Why would some ancient or immortal being really care about you? Maybe the celestial beings are at war with each other, and we’re just the little pawns they use along the way. Maybe we’re not even the pawns. Maybe we’re the little insects on the ground, and they walk on us and never even know we’re here, not as individuals. That’s what I think.”
“That’s pretty bleak.”
“I know! It’ll be the same in the afterlife, I’m sure—you’re on your own, nobody from either side shows up to help you. That’s why you have to try and collect all the power for yourself that you can, no matter where it comes from. Because you have to take care of yourself. God won’t help. God doesn’t care. God probably doesn’t even know about you.”
“This is what your church says?” Cassidy raised her eyebrows in surprise.
“Well, a little bit, but it’s also what I think,” Reese said.
“Seems like it would be hard to build a church around that idea. ‘God doesn’t care and won’t help, give us money anyway.’ Tough sell.”
“But it’s true. Eventually, the lies stop comforting you and you just want to hear the truth,” Reese said. She reached across the table and took Cassidy’s hand, an unexpected gesture. “That’s what I want to tell you about, Cassidy. The power is there, for people like us, people who deserve it, people who need it. We just have to reach out and take it.”
“Take it from where?” Cassidy asked. They were interrupted when the food arrived—steaming white chicken chunks for Reese, crispy frog legs for Cassidy. Cassidy was quick to take a frog leg, crunch it in her mouth, and gesture for Reese to take one. Reese shook her head.
“Are those really frog legs?” Reese asked.
“I hope so. That’s what you’re paying for.”
“Ugh.”
“So tell me the big secret,” Cassidy said. “Where do we get power? I’m not even sure what kind of power we’re talking about here.”
“The power to do what you want,” Reese said. “Some of the celestials will share their power with us, if we ask them and if we’re worthy.”
“What are celestials?”
“The really powerful ones,” Reese said. “Gods, angels, demons, whatever they’ve been called—the point is they’re the beings with the greatest power. The ones who will share their power can’t be trusted, either, but it’s the only way to increase your own.”
“And why are these angels and demons sharing their power with you?”
“So that they can act upon the earth.”
“I have to say, this is possibly the strangest church I’ve ever heard of. No offense.”
“I understand! But listen, this is real, Cassidy. And I want you to be part of it with me. After what we went through together, I know you need power, too, in case it comes back for us.”
“Why would it come back?” Cassidy asked. “We’re not going to make another Ouija board.”
“You didn’t feel it,” Reese said. “It’s older than we can imagine, older than the world. It’s full of enough power to destroy everything that lives, and it wants to come up and out. It wants to walk in our world. It’s furious with us for teasing it. It wanted my body.”
“That’s why we burned the Ouija board and kicked it out.”
“But once it’s been in me, it’s easier for it to come back,” Reese said. “I could feel it trying. That’s when I knew I needed power for myself. And I want you to share in it, Cassidy. I can teach you so much. The church can teach you even more. We just built a great new campus over in Decatur—church, school, the Regional Leader’s office. That’s where I’m working!” Reese beamed, clearly proud of herself.
“You like your job, then?”
“Oh, of course! Every moment of my life is discipleship. I just want you to come and check it out, Cassidy. No pressure. It would mean so much to me to get you invo
lved, after everything we experienced together.”
“No, thanks,” Cassidy said. She ate her last frog leg. She was full and happy, and her only goal now was to get out of the place and leave Reese with the bill.
“Cassidy, please!” Reese said. “Just one time, that’s all. I can give you the grand tour!”
“Maybe sometime.” Cassidy moved her crutches to the edge of the seat and pushed herself up to her feet.
“Oh, let me help you!” Reese hopped up and reached for her.
“I’m okay.”
“You’re not leaving, are you?” Reese looked genuinely upset. “I didn’t mean to make you mad. Are you mad at me?”
“Why would I be mad? As long as you stay away from my boyfriend, there’s nothing to be mad about.”
“I was hoping we could all three be friends, good friends.”
“You were hoping wrong. Look, I changed my mind. You can have Peyton. I don’t want him anymore, all right? As long as both of you leave me the hell alone, I don’t care what you do. He’s a shitty boyfriend, so have fun with that.” Cassidy hobbled to the front door, and a young hostess noticed her crutches and hurried to open the door for her.
“Wait, Cassidy!” Reese followed her out onto the sidewalk. “You don’t understand. You’re more important to me than he is. You’re the one I care about, not him.”
The manager, a middle-aged Cantonese man, ran out and mentioned, rather angrily, that nobody had paid for the meal. Cassidy continued on down the sidewalk, forcing Reese to go back inside and deal with it.
She moved as fast as she could and made it inside her apartment complex before Reese emerged from the restaurant again. Cassidy felt a weird sense of triumph at the meager accomplishment.
Chapter Twenty-Three
“You shouldn’t go yet,” Cassidy’s mother said. “It’s far too soon.”
“Fridays and Saturdays are our busiest nights at work,” she said. “I can’t afford to miss another weekend.”
It was late Saturday morning, and Cassidy was waiting on the couch, her things jammed into a backpack, her crutches beside her. Barb was already on the way to pick her up.
“You can’t be on your feet.” Her mother sank into the armchair, sipping tea.
“I sit when I’m tattooing.”
“It seems like far too much strain.”
“Well, none of us are rich, so all of us must work,” Cassidy said, echoing what her mother had said countless times while cajoling Cassidy and Kieran into doing chores.
Her mother laughed a little, shaking her head.
“I liked having you here,” she told Cassidy. “I’m sorry we didn’t see each other as much as I’d wished. Things were too chaotic at work, but I’ve finally hired a decent night clerk. I hope.”
“I’ll visit more,” Cassidy said. “Once I can move again.”
“Hey, you taking off?” Kieran emerged from his bedroom. The chain connecting his nose ring to his earring was finally gone, though the rings themselves remained in place.
“Gotta work.” Cassidy gestured at her cheek. “That’s an improvement.”
“Yeah,” Kieran said. “I thought about it last night. Maybe it’s kind of outdated, like you said.”
“Definitely. It was good seeing you, little brother. You should call me more.”
“Yeah, because you’re blowing up my phone all the time,” he said sarcastically, sinking onto the couch next to her. He seemed dressed down today, a plain red t-shirt with no melting green alien heads, faded blue jeans.
“Kieran came home before midnight last night, Mom,” Cassidy said.
“That’s a nice change,” her mom said. “What sort of good influence has gotten into you? Next you’ll be doing your homework.”
Kieran shrugged and smiled, but didn’t say anything.
When Barb arrived, Kieran carried Cassidy’s purse and backpack while she struggled down to the parking lot, leaning on the handrail while Barb carried her crutches.
Cassidy stretched her leg in the back seat of Barb’s car, opened the window, and lit a cigarette. She felt a weight lift off her as they drove out through the broken gate, as though she could leave family responsibilities behind and be free again.
“Feeling better today?” Barb asked.
“Leg sucks. I don’t think physical therapy helped at all.”
“Are you doing your stretching like cute first guy said?” Barb glanced at her in the rearview.
“No, but I might have to call cute first guy and see if he’ll really trade me some help for fixing The Count on his back,” Cassidy said, and Barb snickered, remembering the story about Ibis’s tattoo.
“Peyton won’t mind that?” Barb asked.
“Screw Peyton. I think I dumped him.”
“Seriously?”
“And I had dinner with Reese.”
“What? When?” Barb looked over her shoulder at this news, momentarily ignoring the road in front of her.
“Stop!” Cassidy screamed, pointing.
Barb whirled back and slammed the brakes, screeching the car to a halt.
Cassidy had seen the brake lights flare on a pick-up truck full of loosely roped timber, and she could have sworn it was only inches away and slamming to a halt, and she and Barb would immediately be impaled by long, sharp tree trunks.
Instead, it had only tapped its brakes briefly for a curve and continued on down the interstate.
A deep horn blared behind them, and Barb punched the gas.
“What the hell was that about?” Barb snapped. “Don’t do that!”
“I thought I saw something,” Cassidy said.
“One of your dead crow-vultures? A giant worm?”
“I’m sorry.” Cassidy shivered. “Riding in a car still freaks me out. Mind if I close my eyes so I don’t have to look at the other cars?”
“Please do that. And tell me what happened with Reese.”
“She wanted to get together and talk. I thought she just wanted to apologize for, you know, sleeping with Peyton, but she was more interested in recruiting me for her church.”
“So she’s still into that.”
“It doesn’t sound like a normal church. She said it was all about increasing your own power, because God doesn’t care about you.”
“She might have a point,” Barb snickered.
“Anyway, screw the both of them, Peyton and Reese. I just need to work and keep my brain busy for a while.”
Barb took her to Neolithic Tattoo and helped her out of the car, saying she would take Cassidy’s clothes back home for her.
Cassidy was relieved to be out of the car, even more relieved when she walked into the familiar, semi-dorky cave environment of the tattoo parlor.
A couple of other artists greeted her, but Jarvis approached her with an angry look, his arms crossed.
“I had to deal with a lot of your pissed-off clients,” Jarvis told her. “I don’t like being yelled at.”
“I’m sorry, Jarvis,” Cassidy told her manager. “I’ve rescheduled most of them.”
“You could have handled things better. You had some pissed-off clients.”
“Sorry. Like I said—”
“I need to know you’re dependable. You can’t just miss work whenever you feel like it.”
“I told you, I was in a car crash and I broke my leg.”
“Well, you could have handled things better,” he said again. “I don’t like upset clients. They throw off my inner balance.”
“Okay, Jarvis,” she said. “Next time I get into a crash with major bodily injuries, I’ll be better organized about it.”
“That’s all I wanted to hear,” Jarvis said, sounding completely earnest, not even cracking a smile. Cassidy shook her head as he walked away to the office at the back.
Cassidy felt better when her first client arrived. Manuel was an imposing man who worked as a prep chef at a sushi restaurant, and he was obsessed with Picasso. Over the past months, Cassidy had turned his left arm int
o a kind of Cubist tapestry, one piece at a time, according to Manuel’s direction—a hand here, a female figure there.
He’d brought in a crude sketch of what he wanted and a black-and-white printout of Head of a Woman.
“I want just this eye.” Manuel smiled and pointed at the roughly diamond-shaped right eye of the figure in the painting.
“Just the one?”
“Yes. I like that one better.”
“Okay...” Cassidy made her own quick sketch and showed it to him.
“Yes, perfect.”
“Here?” Cassidy pointed to the low edge of his growing ink sleeve, where there were two slanted lines where the eye might fit. Each part she drew was like a puzzle piece, so that each new addition fit seamlessly with the others.
“Exactly,” Manuel said. “You’re the best.”
Cassidy got to work. It felt good to narrow her mind down to just one activity, etching the eye’s outline and pupil in black and filling the empty space with white. It was probably just the effect of working again after a week of doing nothing, but she felt oddly inspired by the simple little design, and took extra care with the little eyelashes around the edge. She wanted it to look lifelike, despite its angular shape—the eye of a living creature from a Cubist planet. She smiled to herself as she imagined it.
She spent almost two hours trying to get the little eye perfect. Manuel checked his arm in the mirror, his eyes narrowing.
“It doesn’t fit with the rest,” he said.
“It doesn’t?” Cassidy frowned as she looked back at her previous work along his arm. Compared to the sad-looking woman’s face beside it, the simple eye seemed to pop out in three dimensions. Cassidy wasn’t sure how she’d achieved that. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s better. It’s the best so far.” Manuel nodded at the mirror. “Do them like this from now on.”
“Okay!” Cassidy felt relieved. “You liked it. Okay, good.”
She pushed herself up onto her crutches, turning down his offer to help. She pulled herself to the front desk to run his credit card. Her leg remained as useless as a block of cement, but felt heavier.