by R. L. Stine
Chris walked over to my desk. He reached over and picked up the Floig, the silly little figure I got at HorrorLand. He squeezed its belly and made its eyes pop out.
That made him laugh. Then he bent its spindly legs so the Floig looked like it was sitting on the arm of my chair.
“This little dude is awesome,” Chris said. “It feels so good to squeeze him. Wish I’d bought one.”
“You heard what that shop owner said,” I replied. “He said this was the only Floig he’d ever seen.”
Chris squeezed the thing again. “Look. If you push his back, his tongue sticks out.” Chris made the Floig’s tongue poke out two or three times. He thought it was a riot.
“Meg, can I have him?” he asked.
“No way,” I said. I grabbed it out of his hands. “He’s part of my doll collection now.”
Chris made a disgusted face. “How about we share him?”
I rolled my eyes. “Are you crazy? How can you even think about toys when we have a dangerous alien from outer space in the house?”
Chris glanced around the room. “You said he was gone. Maybe he went back to his planet.”
“Or maybe he just went to throw a few stink bombs in people’s houses,” I said. “You heard what he said. That he’s staying with us forever and ever.”
Chris sighed. “Maybe we should call 911. Call the police. Or the fire department.”
I shook my head sadly. “They wouldn’t believe us, either. They’d think it was some kind of Halloween prank.”
“Yeah. For sure,” Chris muttered. “I’m glad the alien is in your room. He totally stinks!” He stood up, crossed the room, and disappeared down the hall.
I searched around for a hiding place for the Floig. I didn’t want Chris to steal it. Finally, I tucked it under the sweaters in my bottom dresser drawer.
Then I found Penny, still in the kitchen. She was feeding her three fish with a tiny spoon.
“What are you feeding them?” I asked.
“Goldfish crackers,” Penny said. “You know. Those little crackers shaped like goldfish. They love them.”
She squinted into the bowl through her thick glasses. “But Arlo isn’t hungry this morning,” she said softly. “Hope he isn’t coming down with a cold.”
“Hope not,” I muttered. “I’m going to Kelly’s house. Back before lunch.”
I walked to Kelly’s house. It was a gray morning. The air felt cold and wet. The grass was still glistening with frost.
Someone had dropped a red Halloween mask in the grass. A big brown bug was exploring it.
I climbed Kelly’s front stoop. A sheet of plastic covered the broken front window.
I raised my hand to ring the bell — and stopped. Kelly’s front door was open.
I could hear Bubba barking ferociously inside the house.
My heart skipped a beat.
What was his problem?
Did something else happen?
I took a deep breath. Then I pulled the door open wider.
My legs shook as I took a step into the front room.
And heard Kelly screaming — shrieking in horror, again and again.
“Kelly? What is it? What’s wrong?” I called.
The dog was barking so loudly, I didn’t know if Kelly could hear me.
I tore up the stairs two at a time. My shoes thudded on the wooden steps. I burst into Kelly’s room. “Kelly — what is it?”
Kelly had her hands pressed to her face. Her eyes were wild. She was staring down at her bed.
I followed her gaze — and saw why she was screaming. A dead rabbit! Its skin chewed and ripped, red meat poking out wetly. The rabbit corpse lay stretched out on her pillow.
I stumbled across the room. I couldn’t take my eyes off the hideous dead thing. One ear had been chewed off. The other ear hung by a thread. The eyes were missing. The entire rabbit was covered in a slimy mucus.
“W-why?” Kelly stammered. “Why? Why?”
I wrapped her in a hug. Her whole body was trembling.
She pulled angrily away from me. She balled her hands into tight fists. “Why is someone doing this to me?” she said, sobbing. “I don’t understand what’s going on.”
The dead rabbit smelled putrid. I tried to pull Kelly away. But she wouldn’t budge.
“First the stink bomb ruins my party,” Kelly said, shaking her head. “Then I find this disgusting, slimy dead rabbit on my bed. Who is doing these things to me?”
Of course, I had a pretty good idea who the culprit was. It had to be Bim.
But — why?
I helped Kelly dump the ripped-up rabbit corpse into a trash bag. We carried it out to the metal trash cans behind her garage.
“I … I have to throw out my pillow, too,” she stammered. “And my bedspread.” She shuddered. “Every time I go to bed, I’ll think of that ugly thing.”
“We’ll find out who did it,” I said. “And we’ll stop them.” I promised to call her later. Then I hurried out of her house.
So that proved it. Bim wasn’t gone. I had to find him. I had to tell him to stop doing these horrible things to my friend.
I felt so totally angry. I wanted to scream at him and tell him he had to leave and never come back.
I was so worked up, I bumped right into someone on the sidewalk. Carlos!
“Hey!” We both uttered startled cries.
He wore a black-and-gold Star Trek sweatshirt and faded jeans torn at the knees. He had a black wool ski cap pulled down over his ears. He carried a stack of Netflix envelopes in one hand.
“Meg, what’s your problem?” he said.
“I’m glad it’s you,” I said. “I mean, you’re the only one who would understand.”
He squinted at me. “What are you talking about?”
His house was across the street. I pulled him onto his front stoop and we sat down side by side on the top step.
The cold breeze made me shiver. But I didn’t care. Carlos was totally into sci-fi and fantasy. He was the only one I could tell about Bim.
“Carlos, I’m not making this up,” I said. “On the way to Kelly’s party last night, Chris and I ran into this … this alien from another planet.”
Carlos laughed. “Meg, it’s not April Fool’s. It’s Halloween,” he said.
I stared hard at him. “Do I look like I’m joking?” I said. “Just shut up and listen.”
I told him about pulling the little orange dude from the hedge. How he said his name was Bim, and he was a Weirdo. I told Carlos about the stink bomb … about finding Bim in my room….
I told Carlos everything. He listened silently. He had a grin frozen on his face.
“Nice try, Meg,” he said when I finished. “But no way I’m going to believe any of that.”
“Carlos, I’m begging you to believe me,” I said. “Listen. Could I make this up? Bim goes totally by his feelings. When he’s feeling happy, he does happy things. But if he is feeling unhappy, his whole personality changes.”
“What does he do?” Carlos asked, still grinning.
“He turns evil,” I said. “He chewed one of my best antique dolls into sawdust. And I just came from Kelly’s house. Bim left a putrid, chewed-up dead rabbit on her pillow.”
Carlos burst out laughing. “That’s good, Meg. Very good.”
I punched him in the knee. “You don’t believe me — do you?”
“Of course not,” Carlos said. He waved the envelopes in front of me. “I have to go mail these. Have you seen Stomach Churner III? It’s awesome.”
I jumped to my feet. “I’m telling you the truth!” I shouted. “I need your help, Carlos. I really do have a disgusting alien living in my house!”
I grabbed his hands and tugged him to his feet. “Come on. I’ll prove it to you.”
I dragged him to my house. I pulled him up the stairs. If Bim had returned home, I knew he’d be in my room.
I stopped outside the doorway. Carlos walked into the room ahead of me.
I dove into the room.
I saw Carlos standing with both hands pressed over his mouth. And I saw Bim. He was sitting cross-legged on my bed.
And what was he eating? Gobbling so noisily?
A dead squirrel.
I swallowed hard. I shook my head as if trying to shake the picture of him away.
I saw gray fur and pink-and-yellow squirrel guts all over my carpet.
Carlos made a gagging sound. Beneath the ski cap, his eyes were bulging. He let out a moan.
“I … don’t … believe this,” he choked out.
On the bed, Bim opened his mouth in a sickening wet burp. He spit a slender squirrel bone against the wall.
“I feel … sick,” Carlos murmured. He really did look green.
I watched Bim shove the whole squirrel down his throat head first. The back legs disappeared into his mouth. He jammed the tail down his throat. Then he burped again.
“Carlos, now do you believe me?” I asked.
He shut his eyes. “Meg, there’s something you don’t know about me,” he whispered.
“What’s that?”
“I’m a total coward.”
He spun away. And still covering his mouth with both hands, he lurched out of my bedroom. I heard him running down the stairs.
Bim licked his orange lips. He smiled at me. “My feeling is happy,” he said.
I heard a noise at the door. I turned to see Chris walk in. “Hey, what’s Carlos’s problem?” he asked. “He went running past me —”
Chris stopped when he saw Bim.
Bim smiled at him. He held up a piece of squirrel bone. “Want a lick?”
“Oh, nooo,” Chris groaned. “Look at this mess.”
“It’s squirrel,” I said.
“Living meat,” Bim chimed in. “Nothing taste as good.”
Bim slid off my bed. He rushed toward me carrying a meaty squirrel rib. “Taste,” he said, shoving it in my face.
“Aaack! No!” I cried. I tried to back away.
“Taste!” Bim cried. “Taste!”
He jammed the disgusting bone into my mouth. I could feel the soft, wet squirrel meat against my tongue.
“AAAAACK!” Gagging, I squirmed away.
“Taste good,” Bim said, taking the bone back and licking it. “Bim only heave it up twice.”
My stomach lurched. I could still taste the putrid squirrel meat. I knew I’d never forget the sick, sour taste.
“You try again,” Bim said, waving the rib bone in front of me. “You like.”
“Bim, please —” I murmured. I closed my mouth tightly and swallowed again and again, trying to keep my breakfast down.
Bim strode back to the bed and began stuffing the squirrel bone into his mouth.
I turned to Chris.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“No,” I said. “But we have to clean this mess up before Penny sees it.”
“I’ll get the broom and a dustpan,” Chris said.
Bim ripped the last piece of squirrel meat from the bone. Then he let out another loud wet burp. He slid down from my bed. “I brought happy gift,” he said to me.
I squinted at him. “A what?”
“Happy gift,” Bim said. “To your friend, Kelly the girl.” He smiled. “Your friend mine friend now. So I brought happy gift.”
I let out an angry scream. “The dead rabbit! You thought that was a happy gift?”
He nodded. The little antennae on his head wriggled as he grinned.
“You — you’re a menace!” I shrieked. “That wasn’t a happy gift! That was horrible!”
His eyes bulged.
“You’ll make me lose all my friends!” I screamed.
I totally lost it. I threw myself at Bim and began pounding his chest with both fists. “Go away! Go AWAY!” I shouted. “Please — go away! We don’t want you here! Do you understand? We don’t want you here!”
I tried to pound him some more. But to my horror, both of my fists stuck to his sticky, damp skin.
I struggled to pull them off. But they stuck tight. “Let go of me!” I wailed. “Let go of my hands!”
Bim shook his head. His antennae drooped over his orange forehead. “My feeling very unhappy,” he said in a mopey little voice.
“Let go! Let go!” I demanded. I pulled back with all my strength.
POP!
My hands came free. I staggered back. I stared at my hands — and gasped.
They were covered with big ugly warts.
“My feeling VERY unhappy!” Bim exclaimed. He grabbed the lamp off my desk and smashed the lightbulb in one hand. Then he tossed the shattered glass across the room.
Chris came back to my room carrying a broom.
“He’s … he’s a MONSTER!” I screamed to him. “Look at me! Look at my hands! They’re covered in big red warts!”
I grabbed Chris’s shoulders and pushed him out into the hall. I followed him and slammed the bedroom door behind me.
I tugged Chris into his room and shut the door. “What are we going to do?”
He swallowed hard. He suddenly looked very afraid.
“Tonight is Halloween,” I said. “We’re supposed to go trick-or-treating with Kelly and Carlos. We’re supposed to have fun. But … but …” I started to sputter.
I took a deep breath and held it. But it didn’t calm me down.
“We’re supposed to have fun tonight,” I started again. “But how can we with this disgusting creep in our house, destroying everything?”
“You’re right,” Chris said in a whisper. He shook his head.
“We have to get him out of the house,” I continued. “Before he totally ruins our lives.”
Chris blinked. His face suddenly brightened. “Meg, I think I have a plan,” he said.
I stared at him. “A plan?”
He nodded. “We’ll take him with us to a Halloween party.”
My mouth dropped open. “Huh? Have you totally lost your mind? How will that help us get rid of Bim?”
“We’ll lose him,” Chris said. “I know we can.”
I still didn’t get it. “Lose him at the party?”
“Yeah,” Chris said. “See? We get into our costumes. We tell him to come meet our friends at the great party we’ve been invited to. We tell him it’s way across town, right?”
“Right,” I said. “So?”
“So … we take him on the craziest, most confusing trip of his life to get across town. First we take the bus to the town center. We get off and take the Metro back in the other direction. Then we take another bus. We zig and we zag, see. We walk in circles for an hour. We get him totally turned around. Then we dump him at some party. And we run as fast as we can.”
I scrunched up my face and thought hard about it. “I’m not sure, Chris….”
“It has to work!” Chris said. “Bim said he’s never been on this planet before — right? We’ll get him totally lost. No way he’ll ever find his way back to our house.”
I shook my head. “Nice try,” I said. “But I think your plan is a loser.”
“Huh? A loser?”
“It won’t work,” I said. “We need to keep thinking.” I sighed. “There’s got to be a good way to get rid of an alien from another planet!”
Chris frowned. “I’ll keep thinking. We can do it. I know we can.”
I turned and slumped back to my room. Maybe I’ll just beg Bim again, I thought. Maybe I’ll just beg him to go somewhere else.
But when I opened the door to my room, he was gone.
The window was open wide. The curtains were fluttering. The bedspread was wrinkled where Bim had been sitting.
“Bim? Are you here?”
No answer.
I started for the window to close it. But my eyes caught the shelves on the wall — and I stopped with a sharp cry.
&n
bsp; Empty. The shelves were empty.
“Where are my dolls?” I shrieked.
And then I saw the low piles on the carpet. At first, I thought it was sand. I bent down to examine them. Not sand.
Sawdust.
All of my dolls. All! Even Elizabeth!
All fifty of them — chewed into wood shavings.
At dinner that night, I tried to act normal. The warts had faded on my hands. But every time I thought about my beautiful doll collection, I had to fight back tears.
That monster Bim destroyed my favorite things. I wanted to grab him by his scrawny neck and shake him.
Even Penny noticed that I wasn’t myself. “You’re not eating your cauliflower, Meg,” she said, her face wrinkled with concern.
“We’re not having cauliflower,” I reminded her.
She shook her head and laughed. “You’re right. I meant to make cauliflower. Guess I forgot.”
Chris sat across from me, eating silently. I could see he was upset, too. He knew how much I treasured those dolls.
After dinner, I hurried up to my room. First, I made sure Bim wasn’t around. Then I sat down on the edge of my bed and punched in Carlos’s number on my cell phone.
“I’m downloading a movie,” he said. “Have you seen Scrunchers? It’s supposed to be totally gross and sickening.”
“How can you think about horror movies when I have an alien living in my room?” I demanded.
“I … I’m trying not to think about that,” he replied. “I mean, I almost tossed my dinner. Really. I just keep thinking about that slimy dead squirrel.”
“You ran away fast enough,” I said angrily. “I thought you were my friend.”
“I am your friend,” Carlos said. “But I don’t want to be that thing’s friend! Or his lunch.”
“Huh?” I gasped. “You really think he eats people?”
“You think he doesn’t?” Carlos snapped back. “He’s an alien from another world. Meg, you don’t know what he eats. Or how dangerous he is.”
I groaned. “Carlos, I called you for help. And maybe a little cheering up. I don’t need to be even more scared!”
“How can I help?” Carlos asked. “You think I could scare him away in my two-headed-alien costume?”