My sister seemed like she was adjusting, but at some point she was going to get tired of being out here in the middle of nowhere. She might leave, like Joey, or end up snapping. My eyes burned as tears began filling them. I couldn’t even think about the boys and their future without crying. What was in store for us? I wanted to rely on John’s help but who was to say he would be around in a week, much less however long this attack would last.
Just then I heard something. I jumped and whirled around, retrieving my knife. I crouched down and tried to hide in the bushes nearby. I hadn’t even thought about wild animals. Bears should be leaving their caves soon, and bobcats and coyotes were all around here. I tried to stay as still as I could, not even knowing what I would do if there was a wild animal.
After another moment I heard the rustling again.
“Izzy?”
It was John. I stayed in my spot, not knowing how to react. It was frustrating that he followed me, but at the same time I was so relieved he was here that tears started filling my eyes again. I realized as I began weeping that the dam was breaking. The stress of everything that had happened was finally overflowing the walls I had made and now-right here, right now in front of this guy I didn’t know-I was having a meltdown.
He stayed where he was, and I bent over, my face in my hands, and tried to get a hold of myself. All my feelings of hopelessness and fear were rising to the surface. I dropped my knife and started wiping my face on my shirt.
I felt him pull me to him and he hugged me. He sat there, silently squeezing me for a long time. Finally, I stopped crying. I pulled away and wiped my face on my shirt again.
“I’m sorry I was spying on you.” He said quietly.
“I told myself I was protecting you, but I just wanted to see people. I like watching your kids, and your family. I know it sounds weird. I just haven’t seen a family in a while…”
He trailed off quietly. There was silence for a few minutes. Finally, he started again.
“You are doing a great job taking care of everybody. I don’t know many women who could do what you have been doing.”
Tears filled my eyes again and I dropped my head. I took a deep breath and tried to get it together. I started with some things that had been floating around in my mind.
“Where did you come from? How long have you been watching us? Who are those people? Why do you think they are unfriendly?”
I had a few more questions but I stopped, trying to sort out my thoughts. I heard him chuckle and I wondered if I had said something funny. He was still sitting next to me, on the forest floor, and I was overly conscious of his nearness to me.
“I saw a man leave your camp a few weeks back. Looked younger than you, with dark hair.”
“My brother.”
John slowly nodded.
“That was when I found your camp. I saw you bury something small-a pet?”
I started crying again. I could hardly speak, but managed to choke out that it was a baby. John sat up and grabbed both my arms, turning me to face him.
“You had a baby out here?” He seemed angry. I nodded, still crying.
“My brother said he was going for help. The baby was too small and he came early. We didn’t know what to do. My husband left to go to a meeting place and nobody was there but the baby was gone by the time he came back anyway.”
John scowled in the darkness, the light from the moon casting shadows on his bearded face, making him look like a wild man. He stared straight ahead, frowning, and pulled me to him again. I rested my head on his chest and enjoyed the comfort of his arms.
I suddenly realized how exhausted I felt. The night’s events, lack of food, and the emotional roller-coaster had left me feeling void of any strength. I took a deep breath and relaxed, feeling stress pour out of me.
I blinked against the sun’s bright rays, shining in my face and temporarily blinding me. I sat up and looked around, trying to remember where I was. My mouth was dry and felt like I had been sucking on cotton. My head was throbbing and this damn sunlight wasn’t helping. I stood and stretched, still trying to get my bearings. I felt really disoriented.
“Good Morning!” I whirled around and tripped on some branches, knocking the wind out of me.
John began helping me up and last night’s events flooded my mind.
“Where are we?” I suddenly realized my family was probably very worried right now.
“I’m not really sure. We need to get to high ground and find the ocean.” He offered me some nuts and berries he had found, and told me there was a stream nearby. After washing up I felt much better, and we started trying to figure out our way back.
I was a bit embarrassed that I had spent the night with a man I barely knew, after sobbing on his shoulder. I found myself avoiding his gaze, and I tried to pretend like last night never happened.
As we walked he divulged some information about himself. He was ex-military, he had been married, had a son, and when he returned from Afghanistan found that his wife wanted to leave. She had left the boy with him for about a year, and then returned, demanding that he relinquish custody.
Shortly after that he was camping by himself when the strike happened. He hid for a couple weeks then went up into a few towns and saw the devastation that had been caused by the virus.
I asked him how it was that he hadn’t been contaminated. He shrugged his shoulders and told me there were several different times during his tour that they were given extra vaccinations as precautions, and he thought they might have known something about this particular strain.
That gave me something to think about. I stopped listening to him for a moment as I realized how many deaths could have been prevented if they had issued a precautionary vaccination here. We get vaccinations for everything else, hell, if they had just slipped it in with the flu shot none of this would have happened.
I could hardly think straight. This information left me reeling. I wasn’t a big fan of the increasing number of vaccinations over the years, and I even thought our immune systems were weakening because of them. To hear that something could have been done about a truly devastating virus stunned me.
“Izzy? What’s wrong?”
I mumbled a reply but John persisted. I finally told him what was going through my mind and he quietly confirmed that he had thought the same thing.
In need of a subject change, I asked him about the people near our camp. He said they showed up shortly after us. They never went toward the ocean, always toward the cities, and looted and robbed where they went.
They stole food and supplies, and threatened people with guns. They could quite possibly be contaminated from their interaction with the populated areas.
This was nothing like what I expected. Instead of helping each other in need we were turning on each other like rabid dogs. I couldn’t believe those people would live like that.
We continued walking until just about noontime, when we came upon our camp. I had hiked way too far south, completely circumventing our campsite.
The boys ran out to see me and were very interested in the stranger I had brought. My mom and sister were so relieved it was tangible. I explained briefly that I had been lost and John helped me find my way back. He greeted everyone and then said goodbye, reminding us that he would be back for that dinner we promised the day after tomorrow.
As soon as he walked away my mom turned to me.
“Did you have sex with him?”
I looked at her for a moment without answering. I thought about telling her it was none of her business.
“No.” Thoughts raced through my mind. This was not where I wanted this to go.
“He’s way too old for me, Mom.”
She laughed and it grated on my nerves.
“How old do you think he is?” She got this coy little smile. A smile she always has when she’s talking about sex and it seriously grosses me out.
I got up and walked away.
“I’m going to check on the garde
n.”
I took the boys with me to provide a distraction. I was mad that my mom would assume I would hop into bed with some guy I didn’t know just weeks after my husband had died. I tried to shake it off. I wondered if we should just cancel our dinner with him.
When I got back to the cave I forgot about John and my mom. My grandpa was back.
He told us an outpost had been set up. It was only ten miles away, and we could trade meat, vegetables, and fish for other supplies like antibiotics, soap, and matches. He said we needed to be careful because small groups of thieves had formed and they were attacking people on the main roads.
It was also rumored that the Koreans had exhausted their resources, and we were readying ourselves for a counter-attack. As this information soaked in, I wondered how long it would be before things would get back to normal.
He opened up his backpack and pulled out a small leather case with four tiny syringes. The vaccination. I stared at it for a while, unable to comprehend that this little thing could have saved so much death and destruction. I noticed a strange symbol on the leather case and something about the case struck me as. After a few moments I realized that the case was caked with dry blood.
“Did you already use yours?” I inquired, realizing we needed five. He shook his head no.
“I’m not staying.” Was all he said, and he kissed my mom and ducked out of the cave.
We all stared as he disappeared. I tried to work through his rationale. Maybe he thought we would do better without him. I couldn’t help but feel that yet another man in my life was abandoning me. I tried to push that out of my mind. I needed to think about the task at hand. There was no way we could go with him, so we just needed to move on.
I watched my mom while I quickly administered the vaccine. She seemed to be taking it pretty well, but it could be because she had found new hope in John. I wondered if she was attracted to him. He could be good looking. I just couldn’t tell with that beard. After engaging her in a conversation about the vaccine, we examined the box grandpa had brought and decided we should bury it. Who knows what story was behind that.
We took inventory of our stock and supplies, and with the newfound information about the nearby outpost, decided we would try and get some new clothes as soon as possible. Our clothes were worn and ragged, and Seamus looked like a castaway with the combination of the growth spurt he had over the winter and his short pants.
My mom and I planned to wait until the next litter of rabbits was born and then we would slaughter the other six rabbits, all at once, and take them for trade. Perhaps we could use any fish John gave us that week, too.
The next day and a half passed quietly. It was odd, since it seemed like something huge had happened every other day for the last six months. We were settling into our life here. It wasn’t ideal, but we were surviving and that was what was important.
As evening was drawing on we prepared for our dinner with John. We had washed all our clothes that day and tried to spruce things up a bit.
I heard a sharp intake of breath and looked up. A man had walked in our camp. Nobody moved for almost a minute. We all stared, wordlessly. Just as I had decided to dive for the gun I realized it was John. He had shaved his beard and looked like a different person. He had a bouquet of wildflowers, and presented them to my mom with a kiss on her cheek.
The boys ran up to him and started jumping around, clawing at him like he was some kind of a jungle gym. He looked across at me and held my gaze for a moment before turning his attention to the crazy monkeys attacking him. I felt a tightening in my stomach and turned away.
I spun to help my mom and saw my sister staring at me with a smirk.
“Too old, huh?”
I blushed and ducked my head.
“He looks younger without the beard.” I quietly replied, trying to hide my smile.
“Yeah…younger and hotter.”
I ignored the comment and started helping my mom finish up dinner. I could tell his presence relaxed her, and for the first time in months I felt peaceful. The boys were laughing and playing, and the winter finally seemed over. I knew we were going to be alright.
But I still wanted answers.
Excerpt from The Breaking
Book II in The End of the Golden Age Trilogy
“Did you see him?” I heard a man ask, his ruff voice rumbled barely above a whisper. My eyes snapped open but I found only blackness. They were covered. I bolted, trying to free my eyes only to find my hands were tied behind me.
I heard scrambling and the sound of voices. My antics had alerted the others to my return to the present. I was on my side, my face smashed into the earth. I started choking as dirt filled my nose and mouth. My arms were sore and tired, and as I struggled to turn over I whimpered as a fresh wave of pain crept down my wrists. They were raw and felt on fire from being bound.
Suddenly, the voices grew quiet. I stayed still, trying to hear what was going on. There was nothing except heavy footsteps, making their way to me until a hand grabbed my hair and snapped my head back.
“Where is he?” That gruff voice from the river breathed into my ear. I didn’t even know what to say. Who?
The hand tightened its grip, and I cried out, certain my scalp was bleeding. “Who? Who are you talking about?” I said as tears streamed down my face.
“Sergeant Martin. We know he has been hiding out over here.” He jerked my head around again, as if emphasizing his point.
“I don’t know him! I don’t know who you are talking about. Please let me go.” I bit my lip to try to stop crying.
“I don’t believe you, girly.” He said, leaning in close again. He sounded like he was smiling. “Who made those fancy fish traps? You seem like his type, some girl living out here alone, needing a big strong man to help you.” His mouth was inches from my face, his foul breath hot against my skin.
“My husband made them.” I whimpered. I had always envisioned myself taking control of a situation like this, not crying at the hands of a bully.
“And where is he now?” He asked. His voice said he was surprised that I had a husband.
“He’s dead. He died.” I began crying now. As the words came out of my mouth I knew they were a mistake. I shouldn’t have told him that. His hand roaming up the curve of my thigh confirmed that.
“So there’s nobody to hear you? Nobody to call for help?” Even with the blindfold on I was certain that now he was smiling. His hand reached my waist and he placed his hand flat on my belly. I jerked away. His touch sent chills down my body.
I heard a rustling noise and another voice snickering and I wondered how many of them were here. How long would they keep me? Rapid fire thoughts went through my mind. My family could be in danger. They couldn’t survive without me.
My thoughts were interrupted by a new set of hands, exploring. I clenched my teeth and tried to think about something else. I had read a story a while ago of a woman who had survived a rape attack. She said that she just let them do what they wanted, but that was easier said than done.
Another rustling and a breeze hit my face. I could sense some movement. Another voice joined in. I felt dizzy, like I was going to pass out. I took a deep breath and tried to calm down. I wouldn’t let this happen.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
E.L. Montclair was born in southern California and grew up living all across the Golden State. Her family has a culturally mixed history, one side growing up in the South and the other immigrating from Spain, giving her a rich view of the simple things in life.
Montclair now resides in Northern California with her family. She loves gardening, cooking from scratch, eating sustainably, and playing video games with her three boys.
Table of Contents
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
The Sky Grew Dark (The End of the Golden Age) Page 5