by Teagan Kade
She looks up at me suspiciously. “And what is all this?”
“Your fantasy,” I say, taking her hand and reminding her of her confession. “A bit outdated, but we’ll work on it,” I tease, breaking the tension. Shit, my hand is shaking. How many times have I stared death down? Somehow none of those times was as scary as this.
“Hey, what’s wrong with wine coolers?” she argues, causing me to laugh.
“Nothing, nothing at all if that’s what you want.” I smile, leading her to the center of the room.
Taking a deep, steadying breath, I drop to one knee. “I don’t know about sweater vests or golf or mortgage insurance… Suffice it to say, there are a lot of things I don’t know about your world. But I want to learn, I want to be a part of it. I want to know what it means to stick it out through the good and bad times, not just the rushes. You were right when you said I was scared. For so long I’ve gone from one adrenaline thrill to the next, trying to pretend that it was enough, that I didn’t want a ‘normal’ life. The truth was, I didn’t think I was good enough for a normal life.”
I pause to steady my words. Ava’s sniffling, tears flowing freely down her cheeks. I don’t like making her cry, but at least they’re happy tears… I hope. Good god, I hope.
“You came here, and you upended everything I had curated for myself, made me want things I was perfectly content not wanting before. I tried to push you away, but you’re a lot more stubborn than anyone realizes. Like an old mule,” I say, and she laughs through her tears. “But a very beautiful, incredible, forgiving mule. You’re my mule. I know I can’t be everything you deserve, but I want to try and be everything you need. If you let me, I promise I will spend the rest of my life trying to make your fantasies come true.”
I stop and pull out the box from my pocket. I had Dex drive me three hours to the nearest ‘big’ city, if fifty-thousand people qualifies as big. I thought I’d be there all afternoon, but we were there less than ten minutes when I spotted the right one.
“If you don’t like it, we can find something else…” I say, as I pull out the ring. It’s a white gold band shaped like a bending branch with diamond ‘leaves’ meeting on either side of the center stone, a milky, sparkling opal. It reminded me of her—soft and pure but complex and captivating.
Ava wipes at her tears and beams down at me. “It’s perfect. It’s all perfect,” she manages.
I stand and taste the salt on her lips. “I love you, by the way,” I whisper, slipping the ring on her hand.
“I love you too,” she laughs. “And as far as fantasies go, this just about takes the cake.”
I bend down and pick her up, lifting with my good arm and taking her to the couch for a make-out session that would make my fifteen-year-old self blush. “How about we work on some new ones?”
EPILOGUE
AVA
FIVE YEARS LATER
My nose tickles from the invigoratingly fresh smell of spring. It’s enough to shock a person awake if the morning chill hasn’t done that already. The ground underfoot crunches in the shade where the sun hasn’t yet melted what remains of the nightly frost as I lead our little group up the trail. It’s like a secret world out here that exists just for us—untouched and serene.
“I’m hungry!” a little sing-song voice says behind me and then, after another beat, “My legs huuuurt!”
I glance back at Talisa, with her black pigtails poking out beneath a My Little Pony helmet. I can see those delicate little shoulders are drooping. It’s only been three miles and Dean is doing most of the work, pedaling for them both since she’s on a trailer bike attached to his.
Good god, the sight of that man’s thighs and calves pedaling is enough to make me weak in the knees. And it has nothing to do with my current hormonal state.
“We’re almost there,” I remind Talisa. The pace is already slow since I’m walking. I’d love to be on a bike too, but someone seems to think that’s not a good idea right now.
“Pain is just weakness leaving the body,” Deric chimes in, jogging backwards as he feeds that hardline motivational garbage to my sweet baby girl.
Never one to let my brother have the last word, I toss a stick at his back. “Is that what you’re going to say to your better half during labor?”
“Ow!” He rubs his shoulder and scowls at me. “What? It’s true. Nothing good comes without sacrifice and pain,” he argues stubbornly.
“Mmm, I’m sure your wife will see it that way too.” I shake my head with a smile and keep up the march.
“Baby, if your brother doesn’t value his testicles, then neither should we. I’m sure I can think of better things for you to concern yourself with,” Dean flashes me one of those dark-eyed grins that makes my skin tingle all over.
“What are tent-tickles?” Talisa inserts herself again with a suspicious expression.
“Don’t say a word!” I warn, casting Deric a glare as he chuckles and opens his mouth to say something undoubtedly inappropriate.
“I didn’t say anything,” he throws his arms up.
Ignoring him, I look at Talisa and explain. “Testicles is the word for a part of a boy’s body that makes sp—”
“Whoa, whoa!” Dean interrupts me with a look of alarm. “There’s plenty of time to go over all of that… in like thirty years or so.”
“Sure, dumbass, just let her find out from her first boyfriend instead. That’s a great idea,” Deric taunts, so I throw another stick even though I kind of agree. He’s my brother, after all. What kind of sister would I be if I didn’t torment him?
“But Daaaaaaaddy, I want to know!” Talisa gives up all pretense of pedaling and pouts.
I smile then and quirk a brow. “Go ahead, Daddy…” I laugh and enjoy the rare and delightful sight of a flustered Dean.
“Well, see, it’s… like… they’re… um. Think of it like this, girls have… umm, parts. And boys have other…parts.” His cheeks look a bit pink now and he’s got that wild-eyed, panicked look I don’t see very often.
It reminds me of the day I told him a twisted ankle and the scars on his shoulder weren’t the only souvenirs we brought home from our little unplanned adventure in Hell’s Bitters. Not that I’ve regretted it for a moment. All the best things in my life have been the product of unexpected chances. Yep, the best and most unexpected souvenir by far is still patiently watching her dad for an explanation.
He’s still stumbling and the sight of him under stress tugs at me, so I cut him some slack. “Hey look, I see the view point! Who wants a Luna bar?”
“Meeee!” Talisa jumps off the bike and races towards me like she has all the energy in the world suddenly. Just like her dad when it comes to food.
Deric grabs one of the bars I pull out of the pack and hoists Talisa up on his shoulders. “Wanna go get a look?”
Rather than answer, she squeals in delight and slaps at his head enthusiastically. “Ow, ow! You’re too much like your mom, you know that?” I hear him complain as they walk ahead.
“How’re you feeling, baby?” I feel the heat of Dean’s wide, heavy hand on my expanding stomach and nuzzle against him as he starts dropping kisses on my collar bone.
“Mmm, I could be better.” I brazenly wiggle against the hardness poking at my back. “Do you want a snack too?”
His breathing is getting ragged and he pulls away, bracing himself with his hands on the back of my hips. “Hell yes, but the snack I want isn’t one I think I can enjoy with your brother and our four-year-old watching on.”
“Hey, asswad, stop molesting my sister!” Deric calls out with Talisa munching happily on her bar from his shoulders. Little crumbs and chunks are dropping into his hair, but I’m not going to point that out if he’s going to act affronted as if we haven’t all had our eyes scalded by the sight of him groping Edie.
I laugh, and Dean laces his fingers with mine as we catch up.
“For the record, she was harassing me,” Dean points out.
“It�
��s true, I’m secretly depraved.” I grin at Deric’s disgusted expression.
“Stop being nasty for a second, will you, before I lose my energy bar. I’m trying to show you something here. So, do you see the ridge to the east just beyond that tree line? Don’t freak out, but I commissioned a land survey and I think it’d be the perfect place to put in a series of yurts or cabins.” Deric’s voice is enthusiastic and he’s looking straight ahead, which is good because he can’t see my hand slipping behind Dean and giving a nice little squeeze to what’s mine.
Dean slings his arm around my shoulders and lets his palm drop over my breast like a teenager at the movie theater. “What the fuck is a yurt?”
“Language, Daddy!” Talisa chirps.
“Your daughter is right. You better watch that filthy mouth,” I whisper.
“Oh, it’s just getting started being filthy,” he whispers back, sending chills racing up my back.
Deric is talking still, apparently, and it takes a second for me to refocus my attention. “… for people who want to be outdoors but not too out of doors.”
“Where is the fun in that?” I ask.
Deric snorts. “Whatever, it might be less fun for you, Miss I’ve-only-been-scared-of-the-woods-my-entire-life, but it’s more money for me. Plus, it’d be great for retreats like yours, Ava.”
“Yeah, I guess that’s true,” I admit. The music therapy program I help manage has become a well-oiled machine, giving me time to explore side projects like the singing-songwriting workshops I host once a month out here in the Hell’s Bitters Recreational Area. Camping out under the stars, talking about and playing music. It’s just about perfect. The fact that it brings a little boost to the tour business helps too.
“What kind of investment are we talking about?” Dean asks, looking more serious. It’s funny how much fatherhood has changed him.
He was so adamant for the longest time he needed to live life on the edge and now he’s the one worrying over how much to put into our retirement fund and freaking out when Talisa scrapes up a knee. I can’t blame him, though. He went so long without anyone that if he holds onto us a little tightly because of it, I don’t mind.
The two of them are talking about leasing property and permits and general logistics before I finally decide to burst their bubble.
“And have you all thought about consulting Dex on this? Somehow, I don’t see that conversation going any better now than it has in the past,” I remind them.
Deric sighs. “Yeah, well, sooner or later, he’s going to have to stop being a moody twat and realize the world is moving forward. We either expand or risk caving in. Business might be good right now, but we need to set ourselves up for long-term financial health.”
I smile. “Look at you, all grown up and using big boy words.”
Deric rolls his eyes. “Make fun of me all you want, but Dean gets it. Right man?”
“I think I know better than to take sides between the two of you,” Dean steps back, squeezing his lips together.
“Pussy-whipped,” Deric shoots at him.
“There are much worse things to be whipped by.” Dean grins.
“Mommy, I’m bored.” Talisa complains. I reach up and grab her from Deric’s shoulders. Free of his niece, my block-headed brother grabs at Dean’s neck and in a display of middle-school level antics tries to give him a noogie.
“So is Mommy,” I agree, setting her on the ground and holding her hand as we start back down the trail. “When you Neanderthals have finished your demonstration of testosterone, we’ll see you back at the Den.”
Dean breaks away and comes running after us. “Whoa, wait!”
It’s an easy enough downhill walk, but I’m not going to argue. I’ve long since stopped being afraid out here, but hell if I don’t love it when he gets all protective.
*
“You think Dex will go for the expansion this time around?” I ask Dean, as he comes into the room after putting Talisa to sleep.
He strips his shirt off and tosses it at the laundry basket… and misses. I’ll give him grief over that another time. The sight of his bare chest, all that tanned muscle, is pretty damned effective at making me forget chores. He slips his jeans over his hips and he’s down to a pair of black boxer briefs.
My hormone-addled brain is in riot and I lick my lips as my body grows wet for him in an instant.
“I’m not sure. Dex is pretty damn determined to keep any investors out of the business. Then again, you know your brother. He’s got a hard head and a loud mouth, so we’ll see who wins.”
He climbs towards me from the foot of the bed, pinning me in place by putting hands on either side of the sheets as if I’d try to get away from him anyway. His briefs don’t leave much to the imagination, and I can tell he’s just as ready for me as I am for him, but he pauses and his head dips to the slight bump of my stomach under the sheet and kisses. I feel a little jab, but it’s still faint enough that only I can detect it.
“Shh, you’re waking up your son,” I say, reaching for him and pulling him towards me eagerly.
He makes a concerned face and rolls to the side then and strokes my stomach. “Maybe you should sing him to sleep then, because I’ve got plans for you yet.”
I bite back my excitement at his words and close my eyes, singing the little goodnight song I made up. It was Dean’s idea when I was pregnant with Talisa. The first time I sang it to her after she was born, she stopped crying almost instantly, just blinked up at me with those big blue eyes that eventually turned green like her daddy’s. It’s funny to think I used to be so afraid of letting people hear me sing and now we have dozens of little songs for everything from teeth-brushing to setting the table.
The song ends, and I open my eyes to see him watching me with that look in his eyes I’ll never get tired of. “Now, what about those plans?”
A sound comes out of his throat that’s not quite a growl and not quite a groan as he braces his big form over me and starts kissing my neck, murmuring something I can’t quite decipher.
It doesn’t take long for him to rip the sheet from between us to find all the places on my body that are craving the gentle abrasion of his calloused hands.
My voice catches on a gasp as he slides into me in one fell stroke that sends quivers all the way to my toes, rocking my whole body with every thrust until I finally have to turn my face into a pillow and bite to stop myself from screaming.
The pleasure compounds as I hear my name ground out on his voice and he meets me at that blissful peak I never want to come down from.
“Good plan.” I smile up at him as he puts his forehead to mine, panting.
“That was just part one, baby. It’s going to be a long night,” he grins and captures my mouth in a kiss.
Try as I might, I know there’s no use trying to tame what’s truly wild. Dean—the big bad beast of my dreams.
Hungry to please.
Savage between the sheets.
Feral in the best kind of way.
Note from Ava
Thanks so much for reading my story, guys. Don’t worry, Dex and Deric will have their own stories soon enough, but for now enjoy more of Teagan’s reads. If they’re hot enough for vanilla me, they’re hot enough for you!
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About Teagan Kade:
Teagan Kade thinks talking about yourself in the third person is silly, just like her collection of snow globes and rare manga. When she’s not being silly, she’s hanging out with her own Brock and two children in the south of Australia, dreaming of new characters and torturous ways the
y can get themselves into trouble. Teagan loves hearing from her readers, all of whom are as dear to her heart as salted caramel cookies. Shoot her an email at: [email protected]. She doesn’t bite.
www.teagankade.com
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