“You’re honorable,” I said. “And that’s all that matters. I know one day, you’ll be a better Council member than your father and you’ll be a better father and husband than he was. You’re already a better Council member. I keep forgetting you’re second in command.”
“That’s all I have,” he looked appalled. “How could you forget that?”
“That’s not all you have!” I shouted causing the others to turn back and look at us. They quickly changed their attention to what was in front of us, but it did remind me not to be so loud.
“Oh yeah? What else do I have then?” he asked.
“You have me,” I answered, putting myself into an extremely vulnerable position. I waited to see what he was going to say, worried that he wouldn’t agree.
“And you have me,” he responded, planting a kiss on my forehead.
As we came closer to the cave, the energy became stronger, different than it was when we were here the first time. Someone else had been here but I couldn’t tell who. The energy was unfamiliar to me, but I wasn’t sensing any kind of threat. No one seemed to be on edge, so I chose to stay relaxed, but I found myself searching our surroundings more than I was before. Gavin stayed close to me, not wanting to let me out of his sight. I was annoyed at first, but I quickly got over it when I reminded myself that he would have to keep up with me if I decided to take off. He didn’t like running after me, especially when he had no idea where I was going.
“Where’s the best place to set up camp?” Dion asked as he snuck up behind me. The last time I saw him he was up front with the other Alphas and I didn’t see him fall back. “You guys have been here before. Surely, you scoped the place out.”
“I wouldn’t say we scoped it out,” Gavin admitted. “We looked inside the cave but that was about it.”
“So, you didn’t look around outside the cave?” my brother asked looking annoyed.
“It’s the stuff inside the cave that had our attention,” I told him, hoping he would back off a little. “There’s an open area right outside the cave that we could set up a fire pit if you really wanted to, but I don’t see why we don’t just stay in the cave. There’s already a fire pit in there and plenty of room for all of us.”
“I don’t know if we should stay in the cave,” he said. “It seems weird.”
“And sleeping outside of it, isn’t?” I questioned. “Either way, if they’re hiding from us, they’re not going to come out while we’re there.”
“What makes you think that?” Gavin asked.
“If they wanted us to know that they’re alive they would’ve come home,” I told them. “If they’re alive, they don’t want us to know about it for some reason.”
“So, what are you suggesting?” Dion rolled his eyes.
“I think we need to stay away from the cave tonight,” I revealed. “If it makes you feel better, we can have one or two of us watching the cave, but I don’t think it’s a good idea for all of us to be around at one time. All of our energy is going to keep them away.”
“I think she’s right, Dion,” Deni said coming up on the other side of Gavin.
“Where the fuck did you come from?” Gavin squirmed. “You both need to get a bell to tie around your necks.”
“That takes all the fun out of it,” Deni laughed.
“Well, who’s going to stake out the cave tonight while camp farther out?” Dion ignored the jokes, sticking to business as usual. He really needed to lighten up about stuff like this.
“It can’t be you or the Alphas,” Deni decided. “Your energies are way too strong and can be felt from a mile away.”
“Are you volunteering yourself then?” Dion glared at Deni, who seemed to be regretting ever saying anything in the first place.
“If I draw the short straw, sure,” he answered smoothly. “But surely there’s someone else who is more qualified to stake out a location.”
Dion left us to catch up with Alphas. I was pretty sure we would be stopping soon to set up camp after he had a discussion with the others. I thought about who would be the best ones to stick close to the cave and watch for any kind of movement and, honestly, I don’t think any of us would be good at it. We’re just supposed to observe, and I don’t think any of us can do that. I know I would run straight to my father if I saw him and I think the others would, too. Our mission is to find them but, at the same time, we need to figure out why they’re hiding.
“You and I should watch the cave,” Gavin suggested. “We can hide out in the trees where it’ll be harder to see us.”
“We won’t be able to hide our energies,” I reminded him. “If we could then I think that would be a great idea.”
“Why don’t we cloak you then?” Kota suggested, walking beside me with Nathan next to her.
The Alphas signaled that we were stopping, which made it easier to have this conversation. The others started to crowd around, dropping their bags on the ground as we waited for the next set of instructions.
“Are you strong enough to do that?” I asked Kota who seemed annoyed that I even asked.
“Even if I wasn’t strong enough to do it on my own, I have Nathan, Kody, and Kory here to help me,” she assured me. “No one would be able to detect you guys once you’re cloaked.”
I told them all that I would think about it, but I still felt like I wasn’t the best one for the job. My emotions were too heightened to really do anything beneficial. We started looking for a more secure area to set up a fire pit and put up a barrier to protect us from anyone wandering the forest. The girls and I were tasked with finding a bunch of rocks to build a fire pit while the boys looked for branches and other flammable misfits that the forest had to offer. It was getting colder as the sun started to disappear and Luna had an idea to make smaller fire pits around the barrier as well as in the middle so that we could stay warmer throughout the night. I still remember the last time we stayed the night in the forest and it became icy cold very quickly, if I recall correctly. We only had the one fire pit in the center and when the flames went out, so did the warmth. We slept extremely close to one another as well, another attempt at staying warm. If we did what Luna suggested, we could sleep a little bit farther apart and not be so crowded.
Somehow, the Alphas agreed to the smaller firepits, surprising all of us. I think we all assumed they would shut it down, thinking we needed to keep our presence here in the forest on the down low but that didn’t seem to cross their mind. It was like they wanted someone to know that we were, in fact, here, and we weren’t going anywhere. And by someone, I mean our fathers. I’m still not sure if it’s smart to announce ourselves like that but after Kota and Nathan’s fight with Malachi and Rosco, it really wasn’t a secret.
“So, you two are going to stake out the cave?” Juno asked as we came together, surrounded by the flames, keeping us warm.
“According to Gavin,” I muttered. I saw Gavin’s head shift towards me, but I refused to make eye contact. I wasn’t trying to be sassy about it, it’s just, I’m really struggling to process everything. Every time I think I’ve got it all under control it comes right back at me with twice the strength than it had before. Once I explained that to Gavin he would understand but I kept avoiding the topic. If we were stuck in a tree together for a night, I wouldn’t be able to avoid it for long. I would be cornered with nowhere to go, forced to reveal my true thoughts. It was easy to talk to Gavin about things like that but that didn’t mean that I wanted to. Sometimes, I just want to keep things to myself. I feel so vulnerable right now and it’s making me more uncomfortable than I’m used to.
“Kota mentioned cloaking you so that you stay hidden,” Kory said. “Are you both okay with that?”
“Yes,” Gavin and I answered in unison.
“And you’re sure you’re up for it?” Dion questioned. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to.”
“I may not like the idea, but I think Gavin’s right,” I said. “We can hide up in the trees and watch the
cave for anything out of the ordinary.”
“We can hide in trees, too,” Nova reminded us.
“When was the last time you climbed a fucking tree without falling out of it?” Nico asked sternly.
“Dion and Deni can stake it out, too,” Luna added. “It doesn’t have to be Deja and Gavin. If Deja doesn’t want to do it then she shouldn’t be forced.”
“Normally, I would agree with you,” Deni told her. “But it has to be her. Of the three of us, she’s the only one who seems to have her emotions in check. She won’t go running after our fathers if she sees him and I think Dion and I would.”
Did I look that put together on the outside? I sure as hell wasn’t on the inside. All of a sudden, the weight of his words landed on my shoulders. There was no way I could release the tension I had been carrying since we left the castle. I needed to be strong, especially since Deni just admitted that he and Dion were not at full strength emotionally. I loved that they felt they could count on me to do this, but I was so worried about failing them. What if I lost it and blew our cover, the second I saw my father or one of my uncles? I can’t think like that. We still don’t know if they’re alive. We keep talking like we know for sure that they’re still around, but we have no proof. I know Uncle Ben’s journal looks convincing, but it could be a set up. What if Malachi planted the book there knowing we would find it? He could be messing with our heads. A wild battle was going on in my head and holding it in was becoming harder to do as the Alphas continued to discuss the plan. I tuned out for a few minutes trying to get myself to calm down. I could hear their voices, but they seemed distant as I gave myself a pep talk.
Just Breathe. Clear your head. Have no expectations.
It seemed to make sense in my mind and I found my heart rate lowering as I repeated the words in my head. Gavin’s hand touched the middle of my back, rubbing it after sensing my distress. His touched helped. Not only did it bring me back to the camp site, but his energy combined with mine made it easier to get control of my thoughts.
“I’m going to cloak you now,” I heard Kory say. “You won’t feel anything. We’ll still be able to see you, but we won’t be able to feel your energy.”
I still wasn’t fully paying attention, but I didn’t move when Kory started muttering words under his breath. He hovered his hands over me and then Gavin, his spell over faster than I expected. He looked around at the others, asking them if they could sense our energy, wanting confirmation that his spell worked. He was strong enough to pull it off but I’m not sure he’s ever performed this particular spell before.
“I don’t sense anything,” Levi confirmed. “The spell worked.”
“Are you guys ready to go?” Dion asked the both of us as if he were going to escort us to the cave.
“Dion, you can’t go with us, remember?” I stopped him. “Your energy is way too strong even if we tried to cloak you and I think we can find our way to the cave on our own.”
“I’d feel better if I knew you got there okay,” he admitted, ducking his head slightly. Deni was right. They both were an emotionally wreck. The possibility of our fathers being alive really had all of us on edge, but it seemed to be doing more to the Alphas. They spent more time with our fathers than we ever did, so it’s safe to say they had a different kind of bond that was strong enough to stop them from thinking clearly.
“Dion, you know I won’t let anything happen to her,” Gavin assured him.
“I know you won’t,” Dion nodded his head. “Make sure you both stay safe.”
We grabbed our bags from the base of the tree we stood closest to and placed them on our backs. I said goodbye to the girls and told them to try and get a good night’s sleep. I wouldn’t be sleeping tonight so I envied the fact that they would be able to sleep comfortably even if it was outside in the forest. The barrier that the sorcerers put up after we left the area they blocked off made it impossible for anyone to see or go through it. It’ll be like running into a wall if anyone tried. I could see through the cloaking spell, but Gavin couldn’t. I watched as Dion and Deni waited for us to disappear from sight and even then, they didn’t move. I knew they wouldn’t sleep well tonight. They had a lot to process as well but adding the fact that I was out in the forest with Gavin as my only protection didn’t help the situation. Gavin was more than enough protection, but my brothers have always acted like no one could protect me better than they can. I think it’s just an older sibling thing. When they thought about it logically, they would know I was perfectly safe with Gavin by my side. When they thought about it as emotional wrecks, well, nothing would satisfy them.
“So, are you going to pretend like you’re fine still or are you going to tell me what’s going on?” Gavin finally broke the silence as we approached the cave. It looked exactly the same, except this time, there were five lit torches above the five symbols carved into the outside wall. I didn’t see any light coming from inside the cave, so I knew it didn’t mean someone was there.
“Dion told me they light by themselves every night,” Gavin told me, answering the questions I know I didn’t ask out loud.
“It’s killing him not to be here right now,” I muttered softly.
“He’ll see it tomorrow,” he spoke just as quietly. “Are you going to answer my question?”
I started climbing one of the trees that sat directly in front of the cave entrance, Gavin close behind me still bothering me about things I struggled to explain.
“I’ve already told you what’s bothering me,” I finally said as I rested my body on a thicker tree branch. “It hasn’t changed in the last couple of hours.”
“I wish I knew what to say to make you relax,” he sighed, disappointed pouring off of him.
“There’s nothing you can say,” I told him. “Just be by my side and understand that I can’t always explain what I’m thinking. It doesn’t mean I’m mad at you or upset at something else. It just means I need time.”
“Then it’s time that you’ll get,” he nodded as I motioned for him to join me on the tree branch.
He leaned against the tree trunk after sitting down on the branch. I scooted my body towards him, laying my back against his chest. He reached for the blankets that we had in our bags and wrapped them around us before placing his arms around my shoulders. We had a perfect view of the cave although there was nothing to focus on other than the entrance. I felt my eyes getting heavier, my body twitching every once and a while so that I didn’t fall asleep. Gavin laughed occasionally as he, too, fought himself from falling asleep. He laced his fingers with mine and held me tighter as he started to kiss the side of my face.
“We have a job to do,” I whispered as I did nothing to actually stop him.
“We can’t fall asleep if we’re doing something fun,” he said in between pecks against my skin.
“That may be true, but we’re supposed to be watching the cave,” I breathed heavily, as a tingle shivered down my neck.
“If you really want me to stop all you have to do is say the word,” he teased.
“Stop,” I told him as bright colored lights caught my attention.
“Wait, seriously?” he questioned, pulling away from me, trying to see the expression on my face.
“Look,” I pointed towards the cave but instead of the entrance, I was looking above it. Five different colored lights were shining from the top of the cave, but I couldn’t tell exactly what was causing the lights to show themselves like that. I didn’t notice anything like it the last time we were here, except, we left to go back to the castle before the sun went down. We never would’ve seen the lights during the day.
“What are those?” Gavin asked as we both leaned forward, as if that would somehow give us the ability to see better.
“I don’t know but it can’t be a coincidence that they’re shining over the cave where the Alphas have met up for two thousand years. There’s five different colors,” I examined. “One for each species.”
“Should we g
o check it out?” he wondered, shuffling his body slightly to try and get around me.
“Not by ourselves,” I told him. “We have no idea what we’re walking into.”
“Do we go back for the others then? What if the lights are gone by the time we get back?”
“We need to get down to the ground,” I told him as I grabbed my bag and threw the blankets back inside it. I rushed down the tree trunks grabbing some branches on the way.
“What are you doing?” he questioned as he followed me.
“I told the girls that I would send a smoke signal if we saw anything,” I explained.
“When did you tell them that?”
“When I was saying goodnight to them,” I responded as he looked at me as if it were weird.
“What if they’re asleep?” he continued to ask his questions and I was starting to think they would never end.
“Juda’s awake,” I answered. “She volunteered to stay awake just in case.”
I started to place the branches in a pile before snapping my fingers at it. Flames sparked at my fingertips dropping onto the pile, starting off small but growing bigger as I continued to manipulate it. The smoke signal slowly reached its way to the sky, hopefully visible at the camp site. All I know, is Juda better be awake to see it.
Chapter Fifteen
Juda
I’m not sure when I closed my eyes for the night but when no signal came from Deja and Gavin I gave up trying to stay awake. Everyone else in the camp was already asleep except for Hudson, who insisted on staying awake with me. We were both lying next to each other, staring up at the sky the last time I glanced over at him. This whole time I had been telling him and myself that I wasn’t ready for anything serious but when I turned my head to look over at him, I couldn’t help but feel happy that he was next to me. It wouldn’t be so bad waking up to him every morning would it? We would be bound no matter what thanks to Kota and Nathan’s vision, but would it really be so hard to accept that someone like Hudson would love me for the rest of my life? The guy took a beating for me after all. I don’t think he would do something like that if he didn’t love me.
Deprived (Daughter of an Alpha Book 2) Page 24