‘No explanations necessary, dear boy, I am not one to judge the company that one keeps.’ He rifled through the tickets and pulled out two. ‘Here you are.’
‘Thanks. How much is that?’
‘Your money is of no use here. My payment comes in the form of allowing your love of the theatre to flourish.’
‘OK... thanks Mr Fantail. I guess I’ll be going now then. Bye!’
‘Goodbye, young sir! I will be sure to look out for yourself and your exquisite guest in the audience on Saturday. It is sure to be a fabulous show! Fare thee well!’
***
It was Saturday morning and Gabriel perched on the edge of his bed deep in thought. He fingered the theatre tickets nervously. In all truth, he had never been a great fan of the theatre and had not been near one now for several years.
Every year Gabriel and his parents used to spend a few days in London, just after Christmas. When Gabriel was still a young child the family would watch that season’s pantomime offering at the Leicester Square Theatre. In recent years however, as Gabriel had grown older, the family had crossed the square, opting instead for the latest cinematic blockbuster at the Odeon Cinema.
He looked at the clock on his bedside. It was a little after eleven o’clock in the morning. Seth had offered to meet him at noon to help him pick out clothes for his big night. After showering and changing he walked into the kitchenette. The dishes were undisturbed. The room remained in exactly the same state as it had been the night before. Once again, Omari had not been home. Gabriel dropped his shoulders and let out a lengthy, disheartened sigh. He knew that Omari was away maintaining diplomatic relations with the other colonies but he missed his grandfather. It was only a couple of months ago that they had been reunited but for much of that time it seemed like Omari had been tied up in his role as Head Elder. Much had happened recently that Gabriel wanted to discuss. He knew that Omari would be able to shed light on many of the questions that arisen. His past. The present. The ancient prophecies.
Gabriel took another deep breath and forced himself out of his momentary slump. Despite the absence of his grandfather, this was a time for enjoyment and not for dolefulness. To raise his spirits again, he fixed himself a hot bacon sandwich with an extra-large dollop of tomato ketchup. Leaving the dishes in the sink, he vowed to clean them up as soon as he got home.
As promised, Seth was waiting patiently outside Mr Fantail’s store as Gabriel arrived at exactly noon. One of these days, he thought to himself, I’m going to arrive at the meeting location before my friends. Tamera, Seth explained, was busy shopping elsewhere in Artisan Plaza with Verbera. It was all for the best anyway as she had a habit of becoming rather tetchy when there was any mention of the blossoming relationship between Gabriel and Marina.
They entered the store and the door chime tinkled cheerfully. As if on cue, Mr Fantail skipped out of the backroom to greet them. He was wearing a pair of shimmering, royal blue trousers that, to the two boys, looked more like a skirt. His silver and gold sequinned shirt made a swishing noise like a set of shaken maracas as he pranced over to them. His hot pink, feather boa billowed out behind him.
‘Well hello, young sirs!’ Fantail greeted them. ‘And what can I do to help you two on this lovely morning?’
‘We’d like a gallon of pony milk and three dozen turkey eggs please,’ Seth said.
‘P... p... pardon me?’ Fantail said rather taken aback. ‘I think there must be some mistake...’
‘He’s just joking,’ Gabriel explained, ‘we need some new clothes.’
‘Ah, I see,’ Fantail sneered in disgust, ‘sarcasm. Very drôle. So what exactly did you have in mind?’
‘Um... well that’s kind of the issue... I sort of have this date and-’
‘Oh yes! I remember you now! The young sophisticate!’ He glanced disdainfully towards Seth, ‘I hope you have not wasted your theatre ticket on the unappreciative. As the lead performer I can refuse entrance to potential hecklers, you realise.’
Before Seth could respond, Gabriel cut in, ‘No, no, I’m sure my date- I mean my friend- I mean... I’m sure she’ll enjoy the show just as much as I will.’
‘Well I most certainly hope she does. Now onto your outfit, let’s see what I can rustle up.’ Fantail began sifting through the many racks of clothes. He muttered to himself cheerfully, dismissing some garments, quickly pulling out others and draping them over his outstretched spindly arm. All the while he was becoming more and more excitable.
‘I was thinking of maybe a decent-looking t-shirt and a new pair of jeans...’ Gabriel suggested.
‘Nonsense, I won’t hear of it,’ Fantail waved his hand in dismissal, ‘I know what will suit you best. I’m somewhat of a fashion guru, I’ll have you know. An icon some even say!’
Gabriel and Seth gave each other a fleeting look of uncertainty. Mr Fantail stuffed the apparel he’d gathered into Gabriel’s arms and bustled him off into the changing room. Inside the cramped confines of the changing room, Gabriel poked through the bundle of clothes with rising doubt. The clothes were nothing like what he’d normally pick out for himself. He much preferred a comfortable pair of jeans or combat trousers to the ostentatious harem pants he was looking at before him. The most flamboyant thing he’d ever purchased before was an oversized, blue tie-dyed t-shirt featuring an airbrushed painting of a polar bear, on a school trip to the zoo. However, he had never mustered up the courage to actually wear the shirt and it had taken up permanent residence at the back of his wardrobe ever since.
Several minutes later, Gabriel pulled aside the curtain and ventured out. Franco Fantail was beaming. Seth bit down hard on his quivering bottom lip and slowly shook his head back and forth. Gabriel turned to look at himself in the mirror and felt his stomach drop. The first outfit consisted of a tight fitting baby blue vest with a bubble-gum pink floral motif, an itchy purple cardigan and red faux-leather trousers.
The second outfit was no better. Lime green dungarees overlaying an orange flannel shirt and finished with a pair of furry yellow boots. The third, fourth and fifth clothing combinations were even more hideous. After the sixth disastrous ensemble, an electric-blue, sleeveless turtleneck top, maroon bell-bottom trousers and white slip-on shoes, Gabriel was about ready to give up and go home.
‘Maybe this was a bad idea,’ Gabriel said.
‘Why?’ Fantail demanded. ‘All of the outfits I’ve shown you have been simply exquisite! You just don’t know style even when it’s thrust upon you!’
‘Yeah,’ Seth said under his breath, ‘that’s what the problem is.’ He moved to a rack at the back of the store.
‘There’s no need to look at any of the clothing off of that rack,’ Fantail waved his hand dismissively again. ‘I was about to discard them before you arrived. I knew nobody would be interested in them. The only reason they are on display at all is so that I would not appear rude.’
‘What do you mean?’ Gabriel asked as he headed over to the clothing rack, his curiosity piqued.
‘Well I was given them free-of-charge. A whole bag of those awful rags was discovered abandoned on the last scouting mission. Just looking at them you can immediately see why.’
Gabriel and Seth sifted through the rack with ever-increasing eagerness and interest. Shirts, t-shirts, jeans, jackets, sweatshirts... they all looked startlingly familiar. Gabriel stole a glance at the clothing labels.
He gave a start, ‘Hold on! I know these brands! Where did you say they came from?’
‘The surface world of course! Where else could such hideous garments come from?’
Seth sorted through the clothes, ‘Yeah, actually some of these aren’t half bad at all!’
Fantail snorted in disgust. ‘Oh please! I know what you’re game is: feign interest in those dreadful rags and then I’ll give you a better price on my real stock. Well I’m afraid it doesn’t work that way. My prices are fixed.’
‘OK... so how much are these?’ Gabriel asked holding up four t-shirts, three pairs of je
ans and a shirt to wear for the evening. ‘They’re just my size!’
‘And I’ll take these,’ Seth added motioning to two sweatshirts, three t-shirts and a pair of jeans.
‘I’m telling you this ploy won’t work! If you’re both so insistent on continuing on with this charade then you can take the whole lot for free! I dare you to go out wearing any of those atrocities to fashion!’
The two boys exchanged glances.
‘For free. No charge. You’re sure about that?’ Gabriel said.
‘Absolutely. You’d be saving me the chore of disposing of them myself!’
Clutching their armfuls of clothes Gabriel and Seth backed slowly out of Mr Fantail’s shop. Outside on the broken pavement they turned and began walking away, albeit with apprehension.
‘I’m still not falling for this scam!’ Fantail called confidently after them. ‘Franco T. Fantail is no fool! And just as soon as you realise that you’ll be back here in no time at all!’
‘Don’t count on it, mate,’ Seth said.
The two boys snickered, admiring their new acquisitions all the way home.
***
By six o’clock that evening Gabriel’s stomach was caught in an endless sequence of gut-churning somersaults. He sat in his grandfather’s armchair watching the seconds ticking away faster and faster on the old grandfather clock. He could not remember a time when he had felt more nervous and excited simultaneously. Gabriel inhaled sharply and rose from the chair. He looked down at the creases in his new shirt and cursed privately. Earlier that afternoon he had spent over an hour trying to iron it, albeit unsuccessfully. His eyes flicked back to the clock. Ten past six. He had to leave now otherwise there was a chance that Marina would arrive before him. Slipping his wallet into his pocket, he took yet another deep breath and headed out the door.
***
Located at the centre of Artisan Plaza was a large circular walled pool. The pool was connected to the many underground waterways of Sanctuary which in turn led out to the sea. As Gabriel perched on the wall he collected his thoughts, calmed himself down and wondered how the pool did not overflow. He recollected Archimedes Flattail explaining the system to him on his first day in Sanctuary. He hadn’t understood it then and he still-
‘Hello, handsome,’ Marina said playfully, wrenching him from his thoughts.
He turned to face her as she emerged in the pool... and he nearly fell off the wall.
‘Y-y-you look incredible!’ he stammered.
‘Thanks. You polish up pretty good yourself. Are those new clothes?’
‘Yeah, I picked them up just today actually.’
‘They really suit you,’ Marina flashed a dazzling smile, her teeth sparkled like crystals. She had tied her bangs back, emphasising her high faultless cheekbones. Her long hair, the colour of tropical seas, tumbled over shoulders. She was wearing a shimmering white dress which reflected a rainbow of colours, as though it had been tailored from liquidised pearls.
Gabriel stood mesmerised. Floating in the waters before him was perhaps the most heavenly beautiful creature he had ever laid eyes on.
‘So, what do you have planned for us tonight? I must say I’ve been excited about tonight all week!’ Marina’s sapphire blue eyes were fixed on him.
Slack jawed and momentarily forgetting how to speak, Gabriel finally managed, ‘I thought we could go for something to eat and then maybe go and see a show. Of course if you don’t fancy that we can just as easily do something else.’
‘Don’t be silly. That sounds great. Lead the way.’
‘OK great! So it’s just... erm...’
‘What’s the matter?’
Gabriel suddenly realised a gaping hole in his plan for the evening: moving from location to location. Although he had reserved seating by the pools of both the restaurant and the theatre, he had not actually considered how they would get there. Every waterway was underground. He couldn’t swim and Marina most certainly couldn’t walk.
Sensing his panic, Marina interjected, ‘It’s alright. Why don’t you tell me where we’re going and I’ll meet you inside?’
‘Right. Good idea. Sorry. It’s The Hungry Bear.’
‘Oh. OK.’
‘Is... is that not good?’
‘No. It’s nothing. I’m sure it’ll be fine. See you in there!’ With a flick of her tail she vanished into the depths of the pool.
That was not a good reaction, Gabriel thought. He’d never eaten there before but Seth, Sattan and Tamera had been raving about it. When Gabriel had gone in earlier in the day to make a reservation it had seemed quaint enough. Endearing even. He wondered what had caused such a strange reaction from Marina. He swallowed hard and his stomach clenched fiercely in response.
The Hungry Bear was in many ways similar to a rustic English pub. The stone floor was rugged and uneven, tattered wooden beams jutted haphazardly out of the walls and ceiling. In various places the beams hung so low that Gabriel had to duck as he passed beneath them so as not to bang his head. Along the back wall close to the kitchens a channel had been dug to cater for the merfolk clientele. Marina was already waiting at the table, propped up on her elbows and perusing through the menu, when he arrived.
‘Hey,’ Gabriel said as he approached, ‘seen anything you like?’
‘Um...’ began Marina.
‘Is there anything wrong?’
‘Well, it all looks very nice and everything... it’s just my diet – well not, just mine, the merfolk in general – is rather particular. There’s quite a few things that are somewhat... erm... disagreeable with us.’
‘Oh no! I’m sorry, I didn’t know! I was told this place was good! I should have asked, I’m so sorry.’
‘No please don’t apologise you weren’t to know. I should’ve told you.’
Sometime later the pair had ordered and their meals arrived. Marina’s dietary requirements, as it turned out, were very specific indeed. Red meat like beef and lamb was very difficult for her to digest. White meat like chicken and turkey made her violently sick, as did dairy products like milk and eggs. Normally, her diet consisted of mostly fish and oceanic vegetation. However, the only thing on the menu close to this was a battered fillet of cod. Unfortunately, Marina was highly allergic to the fatty batter. In the end, the only safe option was a rather flavourless salad of lettuce leaves, chopped celery and shredded turnip.
Gabriel was profusely apologetic.
‘It’s really quite delicious,’ Marina assured him.
Gabriel eyed the bland vegetables with doubt.
Shortly before eight o’clock, the bill was settled and Gabriel and Marina were preparing to leave when they were again faced with a similar problem as before. Once again, they agreed to meet inside the venue, this time the Theatre of Life. So far, the evening was not progressing ideally. Unfortunately with the commencement of the play, things did not improve.
Despite all of Franco Fantail’s bragging, The Unicorn and the Llama was indeed a memorable dramatic event, but for all the wrong reasons. The lead characters looked very much like a pair of atypical pantomime horses, albeit one with a bent, ill-fitting horn (that at several points during the performance actually fell off!), and the other a shaggy, elongated neck, which appeared to have been roughly pinned together from a grimy, old bathmat. The play was less an epic, thespian delight and more of a shoddy, overacted mockery.
Fantail, playing the head of the unicorn, trotted and pranced about the stage with all the grace of an uncoordinated donkey. Repeatedly throughout the performance, his erratic frolicking caused his partner, playing the rear of the unicorn, to stumble and on few occasions even topple over into a heap of tattered fabric and dishevelled pelt. This in turn would result in a heated bout of insults and cursing, before they were both reminded of the need for professionalism. Under normal circumstances, Gabriel would have found the whole affair hilarious, but at that moment in time, he was utterly mortified.
He turned to Marina, forced back the lump in his
throat that had become as difficult to swallow as a cactus and apologised again.
Marina’s dazzling eyes fixed upon his with an alluring stare. ‘This is really quite terrible,’ she said.
‘It’s awful,’ he agreed.
‘Do you want to get out of here?’
‘Yeah, where shall we meet up next?’
‘Oh no, not this time, mister. You’re coming with me.’
Gabriel felt the familiar wave of panic, heightened by his recent experience, at the prospect of once again leaping into the murky depths.
Sensing his apprehension, Marina added, ‘I thought you might be worried if I suggested that, so I got you a present.’ She reached into her clamshell purse and pulled out a bizarre-looking, translucent object, with a pair of identical extruding tubes.
‘Thanks,’ Gabriel said as he turned the gift over in his hands. ‘Erm... what is it?’
‘A gillhood. Apparatus, that allows land dwellers to breathe underwater. Generally they’re handed out to diplomats for visitation purposes to our deep sea habitats, but I think you justify a suitable exception,’ Marina grinned.
‘Really? Cool!’ Gabriel said, his fears suddenly melting away. ‘How does it work?’
‘It’s quite simple really. Do you see that darker patch? That’s the mouthpiece, there’s a swath of globweed in there, and that’s what helps with breathing. It filters the air – kind of like how gills do with water. Those two bubble-like shapes are your eyepieces. Here, let me help you fix the tubes over your ears.’
Gabriel felt somewhat hot in the face as Marina delicately fitted the gillhood in place.
‘Now it may feel a little uncomfortable at first but you’ll get used to it quite quickly,’ Marina continued. ‘The mask will bend and contort to the shape of your face. It’ll also sort out pressurisation issues for you as well when you descend or ascend. We’ll be perfect equals!’
‘SSH!’ Fantail suddenly broke from his onstage performance to reprimand them. ‘If you don’t mind, there is a play going on here! Some of us are trying to put on a show!’
‘And few of us are actually succeeding,’ the unicorn’s rear retorted.
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