by MV Ellis
“Oh, well, thanks for that very thorough and informative summation of the next hour and a half of my life. I wouldn’t have wanted to leave it to chance and see where the night took us or anything, because spontaneity is overrated, right?”
He chuckled. “Point taken. I hope I haven’t ruined my chances of getting to second base.”
“Only second base? I think maybe you need to set your sights a little higher—or in this case, lower. Time and tide and all that.”
“Don’t worry, I’ve left nothing to chance tonight. I have plans for all the bases, just you wait and see.”
He reached for another, even smaller remote control and pointed it out the window into the far corner of the room. The screen in front of us glowed to life and our feature began, complete with previews.
31
Spider
When the final credits rolled, in our own ways, we’d both been right about how that section of the night would pan out. We didn’t catch much of the movie like I’d suggested—not that I cared, thrillers weren’t my bag—and we’d also made it past second base, just as Emi had said.
When we came up for air, I felt a lot like a high school kid after a first date—happy, excited, and horny as a motherfucker. Also hungry. We’d skipped our snacks in favor of a solid make-out session, and apart from the growling in my stomach, I was glad. It had meant I hadn’t had to tell Emi that her Milk Duds and popcorn combo was… well, a dud.
“So, that was the best movie I’ve ever been to.”
“How can it have been? We didn’t get to see mu—” She stopped speaking as realization dawned, then giggled. “Oh. I might be a little slow for a moment. Some guy’s been sucking my face off and plundering my underwear for like an hour and a half. I think I’m a little oxygen deprived.”
“Madam! I take offense!” I put on the weird fake British butler voice I’d used earlier. “Some guy? Is that all I am to you? So rude! How dare you!”
“Oh, I dare. What are you going to do about it?”
“Any more of that talk, young lady, and I will put you over my knee.”
“Oh? Is that a threat or a promise?” She waggled her eyebrows, and my hard-on-which had just about subsided after going an hour and a half solid—was back with a vengeance. Emi was right about being light-headed. For sure all my blood was in my dick; there couldn’t have been much left to service my brain.
We collapsed into fits of laughter at our own stupidity, and it felt so good to just chill and be dumbasses together. And make out like teenagers. That felt extra fucking good.
“Okay, so we didn’t eat our movie snacks or order hot dogs and nachos, and now I’m so hungry I could eat pubes on a Graham Cracker.” But not hungry enough for Emi’s freaky frankencandy. I kept that last part to myself.
“Eww! Chris, that’s gross.”
“Yeah, but it got you calling my name, so I’d do it again. Not even sorry. And my point was going to be that I think we should grab some food and head to the second part of the date. What do you think?”
“Wait, what? There’s a part B? I was ready to head home happy, calling my first ever date a huge success. Not that I have much to compare it to.”
“It’s still early. I was hoping you’d be able to hang out for a while longer, given that you have a free evening while your son is at his sleepover.”
“Oh shit! I almost forgot about Noah! Mother of all fucks! What the hell kind of mom am I? Hold on.”
She rummaged in her purse until she retrieved her phone. It hadn’t rung or beeped the entire time we were there, so unless she had it on silent—which seemed very unlikely under the circumstances—I was guessing everything with Noah was fine. I kept my thoughts to myself though, not wanting to piss her off by seeming dismissive of her concern.
“No messages or missed calls, thank fuck. He’s probably fine, but his friend’s mother must think I’m some kind of callous bitch. I didn’t even call to see if he was okay or to say good night.”
I was guessing from what she’d said about her own childhood that she’d never been to a sleepover herself, and she mentioned it was her son’s first, so her experience was potentially limited.
“From what I can remember when I was that age”—I looked at my watch—“it’ll be chaos there right now. The parents in question will just be happy if nobody escapes, vomits, or pisses the bed. They won’t even know which way’s up, let alone whose parents have or haven’t called.”
“Maybe you’re right.”
“Trust me, I went to dozens of those things. It was the same each time: chaos, and not of the organized variety. And I don’t know your son, but if he’s anything like me at that age, you’d embarrass him if you called anyway. It’s not too late to check in though, so you feel a little better. Why not send the mom a quick message to put your mind at rest?”
“That sounds like a good idea. Did anyone ever tell you you’re smarter than you look?” She had the poker face from hell, but I was beginning to be able to tell when she was yanking my chain just from her tone of voice. When she was joking, it held a certain lightness, even if her facial expression was serious.
“What? If that’s your idea of a compliment, now that we’ve got you dating, we’re gonna have to work on your bedside manner next.” I matched her serious expression and light tone.
She swatted at my chest, and I recoiled in mock pain.
“Hey! What was that for? It’s true! Your patter needs work.”
“It’s also true that it’s easy to make assumptions about people based on their appearance, and we’re all guilty of it. So given the fact that you’re tall, blond, built like Thor, and covered in ink, some people may assume your brain isn’t your biggest and best asset. Those people would be wrong. That’s all I meant. It was a compliment. I said you’re smart and pretty in not so many words.”
“Okay, I’ll take it.”
“Me too.”
The mood went from jokey to serious in those few sentences, yet neither of us seemed to know what else to say as we stared at each other in loaded silence. For someone who was always so full of words, I had not one to offer. My mind was blank. No, not blank. Full. I had so many thoughts, they were all crammed in on top of each other, and none could make it to the top of the pile and into my mouth in the form of coherent speech. So I stayed locked in the traffic jam of my mind.
I regained control of my faculties after what seemed like an eternity.
“Okay, you ready for part two? We can grab food on the way and then go from there. Do you like Mr. Big? Please tell me you like Mr. Big. Please.”
“Hmm… by Mr. Big, are you referring to the renowned burger emporium? Or some kind of Magic Mike-style dance troupe? Or the character from the classic ‘90s show Sex and the City?”
“Are you kidding me right now?”
“Yes, I’m kidding. I love it!”
“Ha! You had me worried for a moment. I eat from there at least once week. I was panicking about how I’d cope if my girlfriend wasn’t into it.”
And just like that, I’d put us right back in conversation jail. This time I wasn’t sure either of us had the key. The silence loomed long and ominous.
Emi did the honors and freed us this time. “What’s your favorite burger? And if you say that weird Down Under mess—the one with the pineapple and beetroot, first I’m gonna barf, then I’m getting out and walking to the subway station, blocking your number, and pretending this evening never happened.”
“Jesus, no! Those people took good food and ruined the fuck out of it by loading it with crap that has no place there.”
“Is that really a thing over there? Or is it just something we made up here and blamed on the poor Australians?”
“Well, according to Jorja, who’s the most well-traveled person you’ll ever meet, it’s totally a thing. She lived there for a hot minute, and she says they’re obsessed with putting pineapple and beetroot in places they don’t belong.”
“Sounds painful!”
It took me a second or two to catch up with her dirty mind.
“Ha! That’s a whole other issue! I’m sure there are websites for that kind of shit.” I liked the fact that she joked about the same things I found funny.
“So you’ll never try the weird Australian concoction?” She seemed concerned about my food choices.
“Nope. Mine’s the California Burger every time. With curly fries.” My mouth watered just saying the words.
“Get out of here!”
“What?”
“Me too.”
“No shit. Well, that must be a sign.” A sign she was perfect for me, and vice versa. I gave thanks to every deity on the planet that I managed to keep that thought locked inside, rather than showing myself any further with more embarrassing declarations.
“I think so. It’s a sign that I’m about to gnaw my arm off if we don’t get something to eat, stat.”
“Funny. Okay, let’s go.”
As we drove through the city in silence, the air was heavy with unasked questions. I could have chosen to leave it that way, but I didn’t like the uneasy feeling it created between us, so I forced myself to rip off the Band-Aid.
“What is it?” I took my eyes off the road briefly to question her as I drove.
“What is what?”
“I can hear your thoughts ticking over at a rate of two thousand per second. What’s on your mind?” I probed.
“You don’t beat around the bush, do you? I’ve noticed that about you. You get right to the point.”
“I guess not. Maybe it comes with growing up with a lieutenant general. There’s no time or patience for ‘pansying around,’ as my dad would say.”
“I’m pretty sure you can’t say that these days.” She wrinkled her nose.
“True. Totally un-PC. My question still stands, though. What’s bothering you?”
“It was just when you were talking about Jorja, it got me thinking about the studio and the dynamic there. From the brief snippets I’ve seen, that day and then at the funeral, you’re super tight. Has there ever been… I mean have you…?”
“What, me and Jorja? Nah. I mean, she’s awesome and all, but there’s never been any chemistry there. And even if there was, I don’t think the whole work relationships thing is a good idea. I mean, mixing business and pleasure is a recipe for disaster. What happens if you break up and it gets ugly? Apart from the awkwardness between the couple, in our case, it would also make things hella uncomfortable for the rest of the team. Not cool.”
“So what about Kota?”
“Same thing applies. We’re a family. It would be like boning my sister.”
“No, sorry, that’s not what I meant. I meant what’s her deal? She saved my life like it was a walk in the park and didn’t even break a sweat. I would never have predicted it.”
Neither would her festering cock sore of an ex, evidently. Fact was, even knowing her background, the bold move had taken me by surprise too. Sometimes I forgot her history and thought of her as a regular Jane, when in reality, there was nothing regular about Kota. Not even close. She was more a GI Jane than anything.
“I hadn’t had the courage to contact her to thank her in person for what she did for me, but I approached her at the wake. It felt so much easier to do it on neutral ground, even in the less-than-ideal circumstances. She wouldn’t let me say thanks. She brushed it off like it was every day that people came to the rescue of other people like some kind of superhuman ninja commando, risking being killed themselves. It got to the point where I started to feel like a weirdo or drama queen or something. Like I was making a big fuss about nothing, you know?”
“Yeah, I get it. I’m not all that surprised with Kota. She’s her own special thing, and to be honest, she’s barely spoken about that day to us either. It’s been business as usual ever since. If you can call anything Kota ever does usual.”
“Oh. So what’s her story? I know she’s ex-military. I couldn’t believe how different she looked in her uniform. And how hot!”
I wouldn’t have been the one to open that can of worms, but now that Emi’d lifted the lid, I saw no harm in giving my opinion.
“Right? The cliché is always about military men, but that girl can rock that uniform like no dude I’ve ever seen.”
Emi raised her eyebrow and gave me the stink-eye. I made a mental note to remember not to speak to her like she was one of the guys.
“So anyway, she’s ex-army, and…?”
“She served active duty in Afghanistan—multiple tours, I believe. She came back intact physically, but it took a toll on her mentally, I don’t know all the finer details, and she doesn’t open up much to anyone except Zed. They have a special bond. He’s one of the few people she trusts.”
“Shit. That’s epic. I’m in awe. It’s not every day I meet someone who blows me away, but she’s definitely on that list.”
“You’re not the only one. She might come off prickly as fuck—and I wouldn’t recommend going to her for advice unless you want the truth served cold, then rammed down your throat—but she has a heart of solid gold. She’d do anything for anyone, and most people who know her would walk across hot coals to help her in return.”
“You’re lucky to have those guys watching your back. I saw how they were all pulling together at the funeral, doing whatever was needed, not asking or waiting to be told. Just getting shit done. It was beautiful. So many people don’t have that.”
“Like you?”
She shrugged. “Sure. I wasn’t just talking about me, but yeah, it was hard to make friends when Noah was young—I was busy concentrating on keeping us both alive. And it was sure as hell hard to keep them when I had Tommy isolating me from the world.”
Every time she mentioned his name, a tide of molten-hot anger swept through my body like a tsunami, heating my blood to the boiling point. I hated him with a passion.
32
Emi
As we made our way through and out of the city, laden with burgers, curly fries, and an unreasonable number of slices of pie, curiosity began to get the better of me.
“Um, where are we going? I thought you said you understood that a road trip isn’t workable for me.”
“I did, which is why I had to think long and hard to pull something else out of the bag. But I nailed it, if I say so myself.”
“So where are we going?”
“Riverdale.”
“I’m sorry, what? You’re taking me to your mom’s? Define ‘nailed it.’”
“Can you just trust me for a little while longer? Please? I think you’ll love this.”
I sat in silence the rest of the journey, my brain working overtime. When we pulled up alongside an expanse of parkland, the nerves I’d been trying to hold back started to kick in again. It was eerily quiet, very dark, and knowing my luck, out of range of good cell reception.
“Not to sound ungrateful, but I’m getting strong déjà vu vibes. And not in a good way. You realize this is another serial killer-style location, right?”
“I have to say that when I was planning tonight, ‘what would Dexter do?’ wasn’t part of the brief, because I’m not a serial killer. But if you’re not sure, I can turn around and go back. Your call. No pressure.”
He sounded like he actually wouldn’t have minded if after all that effort, and all that time driving, I’d asked him to take me home. In the same situation, Tommy would have torn the car apart with his bare hands, then turned on me. The thought alone was enough to remind me that Chris was nothing like Tommy, or my dad, and if I was going to move on with my life, I needed to learn to trust people.
“No. I’m too intrigued to backtrack now. I want to know what you have planned.”
“You’re sure?” He reached out and brushed a stray hair from the side of my face. “Because I meant it, I don’t want you to do anything you’re uncomfortable with.”
“I’m comfortable. Let’s do this.”
“Okay.” He was trying to
play it low-key, but the grin almost splitting his face in half gave him away. “Wait here. I just need to grab a few things from the trunk”—like a chainsaw, a tarp, and... Stop it, Emi!—“and I’ll be right there.” I stifled a little laughter.
It was still a total novelty to me that he opened the car door—or any door—for me. Tommy never had. Not that I expected it. Still, it was nice in a weirdly old-fashioned way. When he came to my door, he was clutching an old-school wicker picnic basket and a blanket. It was pitch black, and as far as I knew, we would be dining on lukewarm burgers. The whole thing was weird as fuck, but I kept my opinions to myself and trusted him, like I said I would. As though reading my mind, he produced a flashlight, switched it on, and bent his arm, offering me the crook. “C’mon.”
I looped my arm through his, and as we entered the parklands through a gap where the Victorian iron railings didn’t meet the wall posts, I turned to Chris.
“Are you sure we’re supposed to be here?”
“Define supposed to. To get to part two of our awesome date, yes, 100 percent. Other than that, no.”
“So we’re trespassing?”
“Yes, but believe me, people have been doing this since they put the railings in, way back in eighteen-whenever-it-was, and I’ve never heard of anyone getting found out.”
“Wow! It’s a different world up here, huh? Anywhere near the city and this place would have had night patrols for sure.”
“Well, lucky for us, there’s nothing like that.”
We made our way through the park in silence, and when we got to the top of the huge hill, Chris stopped walking.