As a kid, I wanted to be Naim when I grew up – emulated everything he did.
Right up to the whole law-enforcement thing.
Now, Naim worked for Interpol, at their headquarters in France. He was full of colloquialisms and slang, and no longer had any trace of an accent, but his Ghanaian descent had been considered an asset. There weren’t exactly a ton of Ghanaian-American cops willing to move to Lyon.
But Naim had always been up for an adventure.
“Her name is Loren Harris,” I told him, acquiescing to his request for information. “She’s a doctor, works at the hospital a few shifts a week. I used to see her fairly often, always thought she was bad as hell. One day, we hit this little bar that’s kinda near the station, she’s there with some other people from the hospital, we kick it a little, go back to the crib… four months later, here we are.”
“Daaamn. So you got caught up from a fling?”
I sighed. “Yeah. But I mean… I’m honestly good with it, you know? I mean, since she’s good with it. She said she wanted a kid anyway, so I saved her the sperm donor and in-vitro money.”
“Shorty sounds kinda cold.”
“Well…” I laughed. “I guess I can see where it seems that way, but she wasn’t cold about it. Just matter-of-fact. Neither of us is trying to make a relationship happen, but we both want to do right by this kid, so… I guess that makes it easier to just make the shit happen.”
Naim chuckled. “Yeah, talk to me when the kid gets here. And you know your dating prospects are fucked for the next six months to two years, right? Nobody is trying to mess with a man with a pregnant baby-mama or a brand new baby. You may say there’s nothing popping between you and Loren, but good luck convincing a woman of that.”
He wouldn’t get any argument from me about that. Before she’d hidden it, the look on Alicia’s face had said it all – had said so much I wasn’t sure there was any coming back from it.
“Ah, damn,” Naim groaned, when I hadn’t replied after a few moments passed. “You were already kicking it with somebody else, weren’t you?”
“In a manner of speaking.”
“In a manner of spe—nigga either you were or you weren’t.”
“It’s… complicated.”
“It’s really not,” Naim insisted. “Would your dynamic be affected if she knew about the baby?”
“She does know about the baby,” I told him. “I think she knew about the baby before I did, just not that I was the father. She’s friends with Loren.”
“Ahhh, damn. You’re outta there, bruh.”
“Yeah,” I sighed. “Let’s talk about something else.”
“Yes, lets… cause I know you didn’t call me at this time to tell me I was going to be an uncle. It’s eleven in the morning for me, so it’s what… two in the morning for you?”
I grunted. “Yeah. I was trying to catch you at a good time to get some information out of you.”
“Information about what?”
“About something called The Collective.”
There was silence on the line for a moment before Naim let out a whistle. “Wow. No lead in or nothing, huh?”
I sat up straighter. “Your reaction tells me that you’re about to drop some knowledge on me Naim… come on with it. What’s up?”
“Honestly… not too much. At least not that I can say over the phone. But The Collective is a generic name for a group that is… anything but. Oil execs, crime families, politicians, you name it… if they have the money, they’re there.”
“Anybody who has the money?”
“No,” Naim came back, immediately. “There are only a certain number of seats – they only come open if someone dies without an heir, or someone is banished.”
“How do you get banished?”
“Committing a particularly heinous act, as defined by their laws, or if you’re voted out.”
I frowned. “What’s considered “particularly heinous”?”
The Belrose Syndicate was abducting and brainwashing children, trafficking and training them to kill… if that wasn’t heinous, what was?
“Classified.”
I rolled my eyes. “Come on, Naim…”
“Sorry, man. I shouldn’t be having this conversation at all, especially since you don’t even have a badge right now. But the existence of The Collective isn’t explicitly classified, so you got lucky there.”
I groaned. “Fine. Who is in the Collective?”
“Nigga do you think I can give you a list?”
Shit.
“Okay… can you confirm or deny, if I give you a name?”
“Depends on the name.”
“Fine. Sebastian Gray.”
“Classified.”
“Maxim Bissett.”
“Classified.”
“The Belroses.”
“Extra classified. Dude, what are you into over there?”
“Something I’d rather not be,” I said, pressing my fingers against my temple. “Okay so… you can’t tell me who is in it. Can you tell me… what they do? What the purpose is?”
Naim was quiet for a moment, like he was thinking. “Okay… it’s… it’s like a United Nations, but for criminals, if you will. The Collective itself isn’t explicitly criminal, nothing happens on behalf of The Collective. It just keeps all-out war from breaking out, among these different factions.”
Wow.
“Okay… so then what’s the benefit of being part of The Collective? Why would a rival try to get someone removed?”
“The benefit is protection – it’s understood that members of The Collective aren’t to be touched. You don’t mess with them, their family, or their business. If you do – you face the wrath of the entire Collective.”
I frowned again, thinking about Alicia’s assessment that the Belroses had been the one to send Sebastian the pig guts, and had sent Brielle after him.
“So what if you do act against another member? Is there a protocol for that?”
“They have codes. You can give a warning and all that, if you’re in an official dispute. If the warning isn’t heeded… God bless. Good luck.”
“Meaning that other members might act against you?”
“Maybe. They take the shit pretty seriously… put a high value on peace, which is the point of The Collective, if you can believe that. They want to commit their crimes without any of the pesky conflicts.”
I chuckled. “That is… something. So… what if you want to leave? Vacate your seat?”
“From what I understand, you can do so at will, but… it’s not a common thing to happen. Those seats have an immeasurable value that isn’t just monetary. I’ve only heard of people giving them up because they were leaving the game completely.”
“Like who? Give me an example.”
Naim laughed. “That, my brother, is another of those “classified” pieces of information, man. I’ve already told you more than I should… and all that I can.”
“I understand,” I told him, sitting forward as I processed what he had given me. “Thank you man… you have no idea how much you’ve helped me.”
“Glad to be of service… you wanna tell me what all these questions are about?”
“Better if you don’t know,” I explained. “Otherwise, I wouldn’t hesitate.”
“Well shit, you ain’t gotta tell me twice,” Naim chuckled. “I have a briefing to get to, so I gotta go, but… you keep your ass out of trouble, okay? Not just cause you’re my brother either, but because you’re about to be a father. Even if you’re not feeling the mother like that, you have to be around for your kid.”
“I know that man… and I have every intention to do my best.”
I hung up from that conversation with Naim with too much happening in my head. Between the information he’d given me about The Collective, me trying to sort through how I felt about the sudden knowledge that I was going to be a father, and wondering where it left things between me and Alicia, I was tapped out.<
br />
But whoever was knocking at my door didn’t care about that.
I pulled myself up from the couch, trying to figure out who the hell would be showing up this late without calling. I got my answer with a quick look through the peephole, then stepped back to unlock the door and pull it open.
“Hey. Me and you have a conversation to continue,” Loren said, inviting herself inside. She was dressed in scrubs, and had a greasy-looking fast food bag in one hand, which she immediately took to my kitchen counter and made herself comfortable.
“Do we?” I asked, once I’d re-locked the door, and followed her. “I didn’t realize there was much more to it than, surprise, you’re gonna be a daddy in six months.”
Loren stopped with a french fry halfway to her mouth to scowl at me. “Don’t be pissy with me Cree, it gives me heartburn.”
“So does the fact that you call me out of the blue, ask me to “swing by” – making it seem like a police matter by the way – to surprise me with a goddamn baby bump, Loren. You’re seventeen weeks pregnant. You didn’t think I might want to know before now?”
“I said I was sorry, didn’t I? And it’s not like it would’ve really changed anything for you, would it?”
I scoffed, but didn’t say anything. There was little usefulness in explaining that there were several risks I would have given considerably more thought over the last few weeks, had I known I was about to be a father.
“I just would’ve liked to know. And to not be blindsided with it. I haven’t seen your ass in four months, Loren. It’s just… it’s a lot to take in.”
“You’re not the one stuffing yourself with food that usually disgusts you to appease a growing parasite. If I don’t think it’s that big of a deal, I don’t understand why you do either. I thought you said you were okay with this? Cause if you aren’t… you can really just let me know. We didn’t do this on purpose, so… I’m not trying to make you be a father.”
“I want to be a father, I just…”
“Didn’t want to do it with me?” she asked, and I shook my head.
“It’s not even that, I just—”
“You’re damn right it’s not that, because you could do a lot worse than a fine ass doctor who doesn’t even want your ass,” she teased, effectively breaking the tension by making me laugh.
I took the seat across from her at the counter, watching as she dug into the messy burger she pulled from that bag. Even with mustard smudge across her chin, grilled onions dripping over her fingers, she was fine. Approaching her that night at the bar had been an easy ass choice, and deciding to take her home had been even easier.
We were grown.
Mature.
Had spent the next week or two getting hot and heavy at every opportunity – an arrangement that shouldn’t have borne any complaints. And it didn’t… at least not from her. But for me… I didn’t want to get too comfortable in that sort of situation. So we – very amicably – parted ways.
And yet here we were again.
“This is why I felt like we needed to have another conversation,” Loren explained, once she’d grabbed one of my paper towels to clean her fingers and mouth. “When I told you to come by the other day, I expected it to be later, so we ended up getting interrupted by an appointment. But I knew you seemed… off. Like you were still in shock.”
I chuckled. “Because I was. I mean… that was quite a bomb you dropped. But, just like I told you before, I want to be in this child’s life. And I don’t mean just paying child support either, I want to be a father.”
“And I have no pushback on that. I know we didn’t do much talking during our little fling, but from what I can tell, I think you and I can co-parent effectively.”
“I agree. Between the two of us it might be a hellish schedule to work out, but I don’t think it’s anything we can’t handle.”
Loren smiled. “Agreed.”
There was a silence for a moment, which prompted me to ask, “So… was that it? You get off an emergency room shift and come here to make sure we’re on the same page?”
“Well, that too, but… there was something else.”
My eyebrows lifted. “Something like…?”
She let out a frustrated grunt. “Well, why else does a woman show up at a man’s door at damn near three in the morning? I know you said you didn’t want to get involved in something that was purely sexual – that’s why you broke it off before. But don’t tell me you don’t know how a booty call works?”
“Wait, what now?”
“Wow,” she laughed, standing to come around to the other side of the counter. “Well, let me explain what I was thinking…” She came to my side, turning to face me with her back against the counter, and placed a hand way up on my thigh. “I’m horny, Cree. That’s just how this trimester goes. So, since we had such amazing sex before, and I’m having your baby, and you said that I could let you know if I needed anything… I figured that on-demand orgasms are like… the least you could do, since you did this to me,” she said, pushing that hand up to palm my dick through my sweats. “Right?”
She’s gotta be fucking with me right now…
There was no way she’d be coming at me like this, knowing about the… whatever… between me and Alicia. Was this some kind of test?
I chuckled as I grabbed her hand to move it away, earning myself a scowl. “Actually… I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”
“Why the hell not? We don’t even want each other outside of sex, which makes it a great idea to me.”
“It’s more complicated than that,” I told her, squeezing her hand. “And Loren… looking like you do, I’m positive that this little bump you’re sporting isn’t stopping anything. Where is that watermelon-head ass firefighter that was sweating you so tough?”
She rolled her eyes. “Alec broke his leg saving some kids from a fire, his stroke is wack now. But that’s beside the point.”
“Damn, he doesn’t get any clout for saving the kids?!”
“Not until he finishes physical therapy,” she whined. “Seriously Cree, I do not want to make things complicated between us but I am dying here.” She leaned into me as she spoke, pleading with those big brown eyes. She was adorable, but… still.
“Sorry, Lo. Shit is already complicated though.”
She huffed. “Complicated how?” she demanded, and then her eyes went wide as if she knew the answer as soon as she asked the question. “You’re seeing somebody aren’t you?”
Okay, here we go…
“Where did you even get that from?”
“Don’t dodge the question, answer it. This is why this baby thing has you stressed, isn’t it? You’re afraid of how she’s going to react when she finds out?”
I shook my head. “Nah, she already knows.”
“Okay, so what did she say? Is she cool? Do you need me to tell her I don’t want you?”
My eyes went wide. “Loren, what? Two seconds ago my dick was in your hands.”
“Because I want it, not you. And that was before I knew she existed, what kind of woman do you think I am?”
“One who still has a little mustard on the corner – no, the other corner – yeah, you got it now.”
“Okay enough of your deflecting, seriously. How did she react?”
“Not well, from what I could tell. She said two words to me, and then nothing else since.”
“Yikes.”
“Yeah.”
“That’s tough.”
“It is.”
Loren sighed. “Well… my offer still stands to talk to her, if you think it would help. Did you tell her my name? I’m not going to have some chick and her friends spying outside my office, am I?”
“Uh…”
“Ah, hell. Cree, I don’t want any trouble between you and girl, but know that I will call Alicia Miller on her ass, and that’s not a problem she wants.”
I dropped my head back, staring up at the ceiling. “Wow. So… she really didn’t say anythi
ng, huh?”
“Did who say something to me?”
“Alicia.”
Loren’s eyebrow went up. “Okay… what should she have said something to me about?”
Ah hell…
“Okay…. So maybe never mind.”
“No. No. Hell no,” Loren fussed, propping her hands on her hips, which made her top pull across her stomach in a way that made her bump more prominent. “You’re about to explain this shit. What is going on?”
I sighed. “I… you should probably talk to your friend,” I insisted, not sure enough of their dynamic to be comfortable spilling the beans, but Loren wasn’t having it.
“Alicia isn’t here – your ass is. Tell me!”
Leaning back, I scrubbed my hands over my face before I met Loren’s eyes. “Well… shit,” I muttered. “Alicia and I are… shit, I don’t even know what we’re doing, but… it’s complicated. And I didn’t know you two were friends, or that you were pregnant, because it would’ve never gotten complicated, if I had.”
I stopped speaking to give Loren a chance to respond, but she just looked at me. For several moments. Until finally, a grin spread across her face, and she nodded like she’d figured something out.
“That’s why she snapped at you like that when she saw you at my office, isn’t it?” Without waiting for me to answer, she went on. “And that’s why she was so awkward when I was trying to talk to her. And why she didn’t want to hear about how good you are in bed – She already knew! Ohhhh, I am going to get her. Your friend is having a baby by your boyfriend, and you just nod and smile?! Me and her need to have a talk.”
I shook my head. “I… don’t know that she’d take kindly to you calling me her boyfriend. Or talking about it, period.”
“So if you aren’t her boyfriend, what are you?”
I shrugged. “It’s not… like that.”
“Then what is it like?”
“I don’t know, honestly. I just… I saw the look in her eyes. I don’t know what we are, or what we’re doing, but I know that it was enough that she’s… hurt by this.”
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