by Sable Hunter
Her mind rebelled even as her body surrendered.
The kisses didn’t stop, they just grew in intensity. He made love to her mouth, nibbling the corners, stroking her tongue with his. Curling her fingers around the lapels of his shirt, she needed to hold on to something. She didn’t understand what was happening. Had he forgotten? Need she remind him? “Clint…we need to stop.”
He eased his lips away, resting his forehead to hers. “I didn’t mean to do that.”
“I know you didn’t. It’s okay.” She felt like someone stuck a knife in her middle and was ripping upward to her heart. Even as she spoke, his hands weren’t still, they were moving softly over her arms, her shoulders, her back. “I should go.”
“No.” He wove his fingers into her hair. “Don’t go. Do you want to go?”
“I don’t know.” She kissed his palm. A fever for him was consuming her. “I don’t know what I want.”
Clint felt an uneasiness in his chest. “Honestly, I don’t know either. I’m afraid.”
“I’m scared too. What are you afraid of?”
“I don’t want to hurt you anymore than I already have.”
“I know.” His frankness touched her heart. She couldn’t assure him that he wouldn’t hurt her, he very well could. Rejection was something she didn’t cope with well, and if Clint rejected her, turning away when he saw her body – well that would be something she might never recover from. “I guess it’s a risk I’m willing to take – if you are.”
“Some risks are worth taking. The stakes are high. As I am now, I can’t think. I can’t sleep. I can’t function.” He kissed each of her eyelids. “I miss our banter. I miss our sparring. I miss planning on how I’m going to change your mind. Yet…”
“Yet, you don’t know if you can handle it or not. I know. I understand.”
“No, you shouldn’t understand something like that.”
“It’s okay.” Knowing he really cared made all the difference. “Whatever happens, it’s okay.” Going on tiptoe, she put her arms around his neck and tugged his head down until she could seal her lips to his.
Groaning into her kiss, he swept her up in his arms and walked toward the house.
They kissed all the way inside and all the way up the stairs. When they came to his bedroom, he sat on the bed with her on his lap and kissed her some more. Long, deep drugging kisses. He caressed her face, her neck, her arms. Jensen could tell he wanted to touch her – he just didn’t know how to go about it.
Pushing from her lap, she stood in front of him. “Let’s undress you first, then we’ll decide what to do with me.”
Clint allowed her to push his shirt from his shoulders, but he balked when she went to her knees to take off his boots. “Last time was all about me. That’s not the way it’s going to be tonight.”
“I wasn’t shortchanged in Montana. We both enjoyed two orgasms. Don’t you remember, I sat on your…”
“Fuck, yeah. I remember.” He pulled her to him, crashing his mouth to hers. Pulling her to the bed, Clint lay beside her, his hands and mouth busy. He pulled her top up in the back and slid his hand up her spine. He tugged the neckline of her blouse to one side to kiss her collarbone and shoulder. Pulling the tab on her zipper, he inched her jeans over her hips so he could slide his hand into her panties to fondle her ass. He touched her everywhere but the one place they were both afraid for him to touch.
“Clint, I can keep my top on,” she offered as he feathered kisses on her cheek. “Or…you could shut your eyes.”
“Hush,” he whispered against her lips. “I don’t want that.”
“What do you want?”
“I want you.” He kissed her again, nipping her bottom lip. “I want just you.” Grabbing her hand, he placed it over his heart. “Feel that?”
“Yes.” A fast, hard steady beat. “It’s pounding like mine. Like we’re running a race.”
“That’s right, but we’re running the race together.” He held her gaze as he brought his hands to the first button on her top.
“Don’t you want to turn out the light?”
Clint almost said yes, but then he shook his head. “No. The light stays on.” He sent a prayer skyward that he could stay hard, that he could perform. Heaven knows he wanted her – he just didn’t know how much control he had over biological things like blood flow and nerve endings. “I want to see you.” This is what he had to keep in mind, he wasn’t seeing body parts, he was seeing Jensen. Just Jensen.
“Okay.”
Her small, unsure voice twisted his stomach in knots.
As he took off her top to expose her functional white bra, Jensen thought she might faint. This was it, the moment she’d been dreading. She needed to prepare herself for his reaction. No matter what happened, she had to remember he tried.
Holding her breath, she watched his eyes. He was as nervous as she was. To steady herself, she concentrated on the rise and fall of his chest, syncing their breathing. When he went to reach around her back, every muscle in her body went stiff. As he popped the clasp open, the elastic eased, and the straps fell from her shoulders. Bowing her head, she dropped her hands so the bra would fall to her waist – baring her to his view.
For long moments neither said a word. Neither moved a muscle. The seconds ticked by. Too much time passed as his gaze slid from the plump, round normal breast on her left side to the flat plane on her right side accentuated by the pink slash of a scar.
She couldn’t take any more. “This was a mistake.” Lifting her arms, she crossed them over her chest and was about to turn away – when he stopped her.
“You’re not going anywhere. Stay.” No matter what their future held, he couldn’t leave her with the idea that she was anything other than a desirable woman.
She resisted his urging. “This isn’t going to work. You don’t want me. You can’t want me.”
“Jensen. Give me your hand.”
Standing, he didn’t wait for her to offer, he grasped her hand and brought it to the hard ridge of his erection. “What does that feel like to you?”
“You’re aroused?” She was so surprised; she questioned her own senses.
“Damn right, I am.”
“How?” The question came unbidden to her lips. Jensen realized her doubts, not only equaled his, they surpassed them. The insecurity she felt because of her own imperfection was the greatest obstacle she had to overcome.
“Because you’re a beautiful woman.”
His words caused something to shift within her. With her hand still covering his manhood, she caressed him – moving her palm over the evidence of his need. As she rubbed him, he moved his hips forward, throwing his head back and moaning at her touch. Emboldened, Jensen tore at the fastenings of his jeans – unbuttoning, unzipping – pushing them past his hips and down his thighs. Next, she skated her fingers beneath the band of his briefs, shoving them down until she could find him swollen and throbbing – for her.
The next few moments passed at a dizzying pace as they finished undressing one another. All the time, he kissed her hungrily, devouring her mouth. Once they were naked, he pushed her back on the bed and began to cover her body with kisses. He started with her lips and worked his way down, nuzzling and licking her breast, tonguing the nipple, taking it into his mouth to suck.
Jensen reveled in his attention, her hands massaging his arms and shoulders, her legs wrapped around his thighs. The only time she stilled was when his mouth moved from her breast to her scar – and she closed her eyes in wonder as he kissed it reverently, brushing his lips back and forth over the slight, raised ridge. “Clint, you don’t have to…”
“Shhhh.”
She shivered as he paid homage to the place of her suffering. Cradling his head, she closed her eyes and marveled at the miracle unfolding. “Kiss me,” she requested, needing his mouth on hers.
Abiding by her request, he moved up and over her, claiming her mouth as he reached between them to spread her thighs and test he
r readiness. When he found her warm and wet, he rubbed up and down her slit, preparing her for him – making her lift her hips in supplication. “Clint. Now.”
Taking himself in hand, he fit the head of his cock to her small opening. His eyes watched her face as he entered her, working his way into her tight passage. The relief on her face matched his own. “Feel good?”
“Oh, yes. So good.” She grasped the covers between her fingers as he began to move, dipping his head to kiss her lips. Over and over, he entered her. Pumping, grinding his hips, filling her again and again. As the momentum built, he eased up, seeking to make it last.
“Feels too good to finish. Hold on.”
Jensen squealed as he slipped out and changed their positions, him going to his back, and bringing her to be on top. “Now, ride me, cowgirl.”
For a moment, she felt too exposed. Her first instinct was to cover her chest, but he grasped her arms preventing her from doing so. “No need to hide from me. Not now. Not ever.”
A freedom unlike Jensen had ever known allowed her to soar. She braced her arms on his chest and slid up and down his iron hard shaft, rocking back and forth – teasing, pleasing. The last time they’d made love like this his hands had been tied. They weren’t now. He placed his palms on her chest, one over her breast and one over her heart – plucking her nipple, caressing her flesh – fondling, molding, kneading. When her gasps began to come faster, he brought his fingers to the place where they were joined, giving her the touch she needed to break the bonds of earth and fly to the heavens.
Jensen didn’t soar alone. As she came, she tightened around him, her excitement fueling his. With a mighty groan, he abandoned his control, surging one last time as he exploded within her. They reached the pinnacle together, finding not only ecstasy but healing.
Replete and satiated, she lay on top of him, her arms wrapped tightly around his chest. “Now, that wasn’t so bad, was it?”
His silly question made her laugh. “Not too bad. I think we can do better, though – don’t you?”
“Maybe – with a lot of practice.”
A sigh of utter relief and contentment flowed from her lips. She nestled against him, placing a kiss on his warm golden skin. “Thank you. This was a gift.”
“Yes, your gift to me.” He hugged her tightly to him. “Thank you.”
She smiled against his skin as she kissed him again. “I’m so happy, I don’t know if I’ll be able to sleep.”
“Does that mean you’re spending the night with me?”
Jensen raised her head, a little surprised. “Do you want me to?”
“Are you crazy? Of course, I do.” He stroked her back, kissing the top of her head. “In fact, I have a question to ask you.”
“Okay. Just don’t ask me to start betting on the football pools. I’m not ready for that yet.” Clint chuckled, his chest rumbling beneath her cheek.
“No. I want to know if this means I can see you.”
“What? Do you need glasses?”
He goosed her in the ribs, making her giggle. “No. I want to see you see you. Date. Court.”
“Oh, is this the wooing part you mentioned before?”
“Yes. Exactly. This is the wooing part.”
She smiled and let out a contented sigh. “Yes, I think I’d like that.”
“Really?” He shouted. When she nodded and laughed, he sat up in the bed with her in his lap. Scooting them to the edge, he jumped up, still holding her in his arms and spun her around. “Oh, hell yeah! You won’t be sorry. I promise. We’re going to have a blast!”
Jensen didn’t doubt it for a minute. A new day had dawned. The world was a brighter place.
Chapter Fifteen
“O, what a beautiful morning! O what a beautiful day!”
In the middle of making the bed, Jensen shook her head and grinned at Clint’s shower concert. She couldn’t say she was becoming accustomed to the racket, but it sure made her work faster in order to escape the room. After plumping the pillows, she hurried to the kitchen to start breakfast so it would be ready once he was dressed.
In the last three weeks, they’d become inseparable, spending every possible minute together. For all extents and purposes, she’d moved in with him. Half of the contents of her closet now hung in his. In their time together, they’d taken her bucket list and marked off as many things as possible, even adding a dozen more items, at least. Every couple of days, they did something fun – like bicycling through Zilker Park and touring the botanical garden, going swimming at Hamilton Pool Preserve, kayaking down Bull Creek, or taking a hike to Gorman Falls near Lake Buchanan. All of those things were no more than an hour away. They’d also taken a couple of overnight trips to Galveston for seafood, Fort Worth to attend a rodeo, and San Antonio to visit SeaWorld.
They’d even traveled to Egret Island where Clint and his brothers met with their fraternal grandfather. Jensen toured the hot sauce factory and took pictures of flowers and alligators at the island gardens. Once the meeting was over, she’d held him close while he told her how his grandfather apologized for the way he’d treated Clint’s father. Clint’s lament touched her heart. “I swear, I’ll never do any son of mine that way. Never.”
At home, they’d spent hours in the kitchen together. Making gumbo. Baking cakes. Popping popcorn. Even playing scrabble at the kitchen table. When one of them needed to work, the other gave them space. And when one needed a shoulder to lean on, the other made the support a priority.
Most evenings they took the horses out for a moonlight ride. Jensen’s favorite place to go was the old Nameless school. She loved to ride along the fence near the cemetery. There were these huge moonflower bushes so full of night-blooming white trumpet flowers that they literally glowed in the dark. Of course, Clint would tell her ghost stories as they rode, knowing full well she’d be wanting to cuddle close before the evening was over.
Once or twice, they’d even gone storm chasing. Those excursions couldn’t be planned, of course. But when a storm cell came calling, Clint would monitor the situation and if the circumstances looked to be right – they’d take off in pursuit of a thrill. She soon discovered why he loved it so, observing such power and beauty up close was unforgettable.
No matter what their days entailed, their nights were spent in one another’s arms. Jensen never dreamed sharing her body with a man could be so perfect. Clint was a generous lover. He never failed to make her feel cherished. Plus, he made her smile. He was funny. There were times he kept her in stitches. Since he’d learned she liked Reader’s Digest jokes, he would follow her around reading one after the other. Sometimes he couldn’t finish reading one before he doubled over in laughter himself. And – he was so intelligent. She might have the doctorate, but he was crazy smart.
Chatter. Chirp. Chatter.
“What do you need, Miss Rose? How about a slice of apple?” Carefully stepping around Clint’s pet, she cut up a Granny Smith apple and bent to put several pieces in the skunk’s bowl. “There. Enjoy.”
Humming the song she’d heard Clint singing, Jensen threw together a Denver omelet and popped it into the oven.
“Man, something smells good.”
The next thing Jensen knew he’d slipped up behind her and captured her in his arms. Burying his face in her neck, he inhaled deeply. “Ah, it’s you, pretty girl!”
“Flattery will get you fed, handsome.” She turned in his arms to kiss him soundly. “What’s on your agenda for the day?”
“Well, I’d hoped to take it easy. No such luck. I have to meet a contractor at the building site at ten, then back here for a four-hour training session at two. I’ll be through by six. After that, I’m all yours. How about you?”
“Ah, I have a full day at the office. Nothing earth-shattering. If it’s okay with you, I thought I’d take off early and meet Libby at Highlands. There’s a support group meeting at five.”
“Sure.” He set the table and poured them both a cup of coffee. “I’m not tell
ing you what to do, by any means – but…do you still attend the support group because I’m not giving you something you need?”
“No!” Jensen was emphatic. “Not at all. Does it bother you that I go?”
“No, it doesn’t. I just wanted to make sure, that’s all. Just be careful driving up there, you know how the traffic can be at that time of day.”
“Worrier.” She gave him a kiss as she placed a little over half the omelet on his plate. “Want some toast?”
“Yes. With jelly.”
She smiled as she placed two pieces on a smaller plate and fetched his favorite blackberry jelly from the fridge. “Did you decide if we’re going to Tebow Friday night for dinner?”
He forked a bite of omelet, then gave her a straight look. “I told Aron we would be there if he promised we could spend the night in the guesthouse and go skinny dipping in the stock tank.”
Jensen looked horrified. “I’m not skinny dipping anywhere!”
“And why not?”
She sputtered. “Because…because…well – I’m just not!”
Clint shook his head at her. “You’ve got to stop thinking that way. You’re amazing. I can’t stop looking at you.” He wasn’t lying, he couldn’t. Despite the slash where her right breast should be, she had this incredible hour-glass figure with a waist he could span. Her hips were as luscious as her remaining breast – and those legs… Clint loved to watch her walk in a short pencil skirt almost as much as he loved to have those long legs wrapped around his waist. Like he’d commented once, her face was Grace Kelly classical, a profile worthy of a princess. All in all, Jensen was his ideal woman. Perfect in every way.
“I still say you need glasses. Maybe soon, we could go talk to a plastic surgeon about reconstruction.”