by Brey Willows
“Obviously.” Fina closed her eyes and tilted her face to the sun. “Here in Volare, we believe that love is what makes life worth living. That kindness, and laughter, and family, and desire are what create beautiful communities. We search for a mate who can bring out the best in us. There’s no ambition, no inequality. We live for the beauty of every day and love as best we can.” She opened one eye and looked sideways at Jessa. “Which would you choose if you hadn’t been brought up in one or the other?”
Jessa frowned. “That’s an illogical question. I was born into that, so that’s what I believe.”
“Kylin was born into a place where life is valued by what a person has to sell and what they can deliver. A ruthless society, one that would brand a child for trying to return something they hadn’t taken in the first place.” Fina held up a blue crystal and the light hit it and sent rainbows across Jessa’s lap. “And yet, her respect and desire to help people has never diminished. Like a crystal that is basically just glass, she’s so much more, and she shapes the world around her as best as she can, bending the light to create something beautiful in the dark.” She handed Jessa the crystal and closed it in her palm. “She was born into chaos, and yet she believes in love. You’re not required to be the person others raise you to be.”
She stood, squeezed Jessa’s shoulder, and walked away quietly.
Jessa opened her palm and studied the crystal. Was that true? Could she let go of the ways of her people and learn to be…something else? And, really, did it matter? Because when it all came down to it, she was going to leave. She’d find another ship and go back to the career she loved and had worked so hard for. It wasn’t simply that they were very different people. It was that their paths were going to be separate, and getting involved before she left was folly.
Wasn’t it?
* * *
Kylin handed Asol another bag of food, and Asol tucked it away under the seat. The boat rocked gently, but Asol didn’t seem to notice. She looked so relaxed, so in her element. And so young.
She picked up another sack and passed it over. “I need to talk to you about something.”
Asol motioned for another bag. “I’m listening.”
Where to start? “Look, I know you said you wanted to go to Quasi, where you could be anything you want.”
“Yeah? Don’t you think I can be something other than a dock rat?”
Kylin stopped mid-handover. “Hey, wait a second. Hear me out before you get crazy on me, okay?”
Asol reached for the bag. “Sore spot. Sorry. Go on.”
“I just want to make sure you know what you’re getting into, that’s all.” Kylin wiped away the sweat on her forehead with her sleeve. “Quasi isn’t some kind of paradise. It’s not like the streets are paved with linari and credit chips are growing on trees. It’s a good community, yeah. And we look after each other. But it’s a tough place, you know? You have to fight for your space, and you have to find a way to make a living. Jobs can be hard to come by. It can turn you into someone you don’t want to be.”
Asol stopped and crossed her arms, and she looked far older than her age as she looked at Kylin seriously. “You think I don’t know that? Cosmos shit, Kylin, you’re running from bounty hunters because of some debt you owe some very bad man. And I’ve seen the way you change the subject when Jessa asks about Quasi. I’d bet a slaver’s shipload that you’ve got a whole heap of other secrets we don’t know.” She shrugged. “Anything has to be better than working the slaver’s docks. Anything. Shoveling prowler shit during breeding season wrapped in bloody meat would be better, and if that’s what I have to do in Quasi, it’s a step up. But at least I’m the one who gets to decide, not someone who puts a collar around my neck and zaps me because they want to make their friends laugh. On the docks, I’m just waiting to get snapped up by some other slaver who rips my life from under me. And watching all those people being loaded on ships…”
The naked pain in her eyes made Kylin shudder. Of all the paths she’d had to take, of all the issues she faced, thank the universe that had never been one of them. “But you don’t have to shovel prowler shit naked in the streets. You could stay here. Find a mate, live in peace.”
Asol reached down and splashed water at Kylin’s face. “I didn’t say anything about being naked, you dirty old swooper.”
Kylin laughed and tossed a water bag to her.
Asol returned to being serious. “You know what it’s like. When you’re from somewhere hard, somewhere that gives you edges that can’t be sanded down. I love it here, and yeah, the girls like a bit of the rough side right now. But I’d always feel out of place, and eventually, they’d see me as the outsider I am. The novelty would fade. And I’d be right back where I am now, except that I wouldn’t have you and Jessa to travel with.”
The truth in her words was hard to hear, but she was right. And Kylin understood perfectly. When she’d sailed away from Volare so long ago, she’d been devastated, but a part of her knew she couldn’t stay there. They were special, unique. Nothing like her.
“So you’re coming with us, then.”
Asol rolled her eyes. “You’re a smart one, too.”
“Hey, I can still leave you here with the beautiful people, dock rat.” Kylin grinned and gave Asol a hand out of the boat and back onto land.
“You wouldn’t last a day without me on the sea.”
Laughing, they walked back to the main hall together, where the Volare were gathering for the evening roosting hour.
Jessa was sitting on her bed with her back against the wall, and she smiled at them when they came in, but Kylin could tell something was on her mind.
“Everything okay?”
Jessa nodded. “I had dinner with Fina and Tulvia, and they’ve left food for you.” She nodded toward a covered tray. “They said we’re leaving in the morning?”
Asol went to the tray and dug in. Kylin sat on Jessa’s bed. “We just finished loading the boat, and we’re ready to go. We can sail at first light. Is that okay?”
Jessa nodded and took Kylin’s hand. “Can we take a walk after roosting hour? I’d very much like to see the special places you liked here before we leave.”
Surprised, Kylin smiled and squeezed her hand. “Sure. I’d love to.”
“You should try this,” Asol said, her mouth full. “I may change my mind just so I can eat this food for the rest of my life.”
Kylin laughed and joined her at the table. They ate quickly, and soon it was time to join the others for roosting hour. A storyteller told the tale of the days they’d roamed the planet, when there were different tribes of Volare. It was beautifully told, and she saw Jessa wiping away tears. Tulvia also told the people that their guests would be leaving the next day, so to make sure to say their good-byes tonight.
When roosting hour was over, she took Jessa’s hand, and they made their way back outside amidst people stopping to wish them safe travels. This time, Kylin had an open invitation to return, and that felt like a caress to her soul.
She led Jessa through the trees and up a hill that was far from the community. Soon, the only sounds were from the crashing of the waves and the calls of the night birds. When they stopped in front of a grouping of standing stones arranged in a circle, Kylin let go of Jessa’s hand and caressed one of the stones.
“What is this place?” Jessa asked quietly.
“The Volare believe in an energy that surrounds our planet. Not a god, but an entity of sorts that looks out for us. Or for them, anyway. They come here on certain days of the year to reconnect with that entity.” She traced the swirl cut into the stone. “Among other things, they believe that the entity sends them someone to help them in times of true crisis.” She shrugged and sat in the middle of the circle, where Jessa joined her. “I can’t understand it, and I don’t get how they can still have that kind of faith when so many of them were wiped out.”
“Hope.” Jessa hugged her knees to her chest. “I’ve read about it and e
ven talked to passengers about it. Belief isn’t about evidence. It’s about the need for hope that things can change.” She looked up at the night sky. “You used to come here, before?”
Those days seemed so long ago. “Particularly on nights when Fina had duties or her father wouldn’t let her out. I’d sit here and wonder if someone was looking out for me, and I’d ask whoever it was for help.”
“And did you get any?”
Kylin sighed deeply. “No. And I learned to depend on myself.”
They sat quietly for some time before Jessa spoke again.
“What is your life in Quasi like, Kylin?”
It was like she already had an inkling of the answer, but Kylin knew full well she couldn’t imagine the truth of it. How much to tell her? She’d see some of it herself soon anyway. “It’s not life on a passenger ship.” She smiled to show she was teasing, but Jessa’s expression was serious. “It’s hard. Frenetic. I’m like fresh meat in a cage surrounded by predators. But I hold my own, and I do what I have to do to survive.”
It wasn’t much of an answer, not really. She didn’t talk about Orlin and the fact that she often fought for her dinner. She didn’t talk about her father and his failing health. She didn’t mention Maana and the debt she had to honor when she got back, which very well might mean a painful repayment.
Jessa didn’t need to know all that. She needed to know that life was hard and not pretty. Because she wasn’t going to have to deal with it for long, so there was no reason to make her see Kylin as even less than she was.
“I’m sorry that life here is so hard. This planet has such beauty among the brutality. It seems to me that if we were to bring it into the trade routes, things might be easier.” Jessa’s head was tilted, catching the light from the first moon and making her skin glow. “If you had an Indemnion ambassador who could speak for the planet and show them that there’s more here than people know…”
Kylin was interested in Jessa’s line of thinking, but plenty of people had come and gone from Indemnion, and no one had ever come back saying they were interested in trade. “It’s a nice thought. Who knows? Maybe one day.” She stood and brushed off her pants before holding her hand out to Jessa to help her up. “We’ve got a big day tomorrow. We should probably get some sleep.”
Jessa took her hand, and Kylin knew her well enough now to know she was deep in thought. On their way back to the hall Kylin pointed out places she’d liked to go and told an anecdote or two about the mischief she’d gotten up to. Still, it felt like Jessa was only half listening.
When they got back to their room, Asol wasn’t there, and Kylin waited, hoping.
“Would you…” Jessa motioned at her bed.
She had an adorable way of drifting off when she wasn’t sure how to phrase what she wanted, and Kylin bet that was a new experience for the ship’s captain too. “Let me take a quick shower. I’ll be right back.”
The water felt heavenly, and Kylin let it wash away the pervasive feeling of melancholy running through her as she thought of leaving tomorrow. She’d get back, take Jessa to her crew, get Asol settled at Auntie Blue’s, help get Jessa and her crew a ride to the Heathers, and then she’d deal with Orlin, Maana, and her dad.
No problem.
She tried to shake off the weight of her life as she crawled into bed beside Jessa and pulled her close. They had this, at least. This intimacy that ran deeper than any simple sexual encounter she’d had over the years.
She’d miss it.
Chapter Sixteen
Jessa hugged Fina and said good-bye. Much like it had when she’d said good-bye to Sherta, her heart ached at the possibility of a friend left behind. How had she become this emotional, attached person in such a short time?
Kylin gave Fina a long hug, and they put their foreheads together. Tears slipped down Fina’s cheeks, and Jessa turned away from the touching display. It wasn’t hers to watch. Tulvia seemed to understand when he moved next to her.
“Perhaps it wasn’t just Kylin who was sent to us.” He glanced at her, then away. “Perhaps the two of you will help us.”
She wasn’t sure what he meant by help them, but at least she understood the concept in his statement thanks to Kylin taking her to the standing stones. “If there’s anything I can do, please tell me.”
He shook his head. “If we knew what to ask, where the clouds lay, we would. But the way ahead is unclear.”
It felt like a riddle, one with important connotations, but before she could ask him to explain, Asol called out from the boat.
“We’d better get moving. The wind is perfect.”
Jessa took Asol’s hand and climbed clumsily into the boat. Truly, being planet bound was something she still didn’t fully appreciate. Kylin climbed in after her and they released the little sail, which immediately began tugging the boat toward the open water.
Many of the Volare had come to see them off, and there were waves and calls for a good journey as the rope was untied and thrown to them and the boat shot off into the water. There wouldn’t be any rowing for a while. Jessa waved back until they were out of sight, and then looked up. Far, far above, so that they were just black specks in the sky, the Volare sent to watch over them flew. Had she not known who they were, she’d have assumed they were simply high-flying birds. Could they get to them in time, if they needed help? She pushed the thought aside. There was no point in worrying over something that was so out of her control.
Instead, she turned to Kylin. “What are the Ellidies?”
Kylin pulled a map from the bag at her feet and unfolded it so Jessa could see. “They’re a string of uninhabited islands that run from the Volare toward the mainland. Some are little more than shards of rock, some are fairly large, but none are big enough for anyone to actually live on.” She traced the little dots on the map. “We’ll stay by them as long as we can, and then here, before we get to the last two, we’ll turn off and head toward the nomad lands. There are docks there, and we might get lucky and find a caravan headed toward Quasi.”
Jessa had always loved maps, and she studied this one carefully. It took on new meaning now that she’d been to a few of the places listed and could picture them for the interesting places they were.
They sailed in companionable silence, and Kylin handed food around after a few hours. They passed, as Kylin had said, some large rocks and some that looked more like islands. The boat flew along the water under the power of what seemed like an increasing wind, and she didn’t miss the look shared by Kylin and Asol when a particularly strong gust slammed into the boat sideways.
“Can I ask you a personal question, Kylin?” Jessa asked.
Kylin raised her eyebrow in that sexy way that made Jessa shiver.
“As long as I can answer it in front of the innocent young one here.”
Asol laughed. “The Volare didn’t find me all that innocent.”
Jessa smiled, but her mind was on her thoughts. “The bounty on you—is there a way to comm with someone and explain that there’s been a mix-up?”
Kylin frowned. “I’ve been so focused on avoiding the hunters I hadn’t considered that. But once a bounty is out, it’s practically impossible to revoke it until the person is caught. And the person upset with me isn’t exactly reasonable.” She pulled open her bag and dug out the comms unit. She flipped it open and shaded the screen so she could see. “But you’re right. If I let the person who put out the bounty know I’m on my way back, we might have an easier time making our way through Quasi. It’s worth a try.” She moved the comms unit around and then flipped it shut with a sigh. “We’re out of range. But as soon as we get to land, I’ll give it a try. Great idea, Jess.”
She’d sailed ships through the universe. She’d seen nebulas, had dinner with kings. But Kylin’s praise warmed her inside like nothing else ever had.
Asol yelped, and the sail snapped in the wind. Kylin jumped up, and she took the wheel as Asol steadied the sail. The boat was moving frighteningly fa
st and Jessa hung on to the side, the water lashing at her hands and spray making her eyes water. Clouds whirled and spun across the sky, turning from white to an oily gray.
“Tsuna gale!” Asol yelled over the howling wind. “We need to land!”
Jessa didn’t know how they could see with the wind whipping at their faces, and images of her own ship coming apart in space flashed through her mind. Was she going to die in the ocean after all she’d survived? Surely not. She closed her eyes against the wind and water and held on.
The boat slipped sideways, water sloshing in, before it righted again.
“Two clicks ahead, to your left!” Asol yelled, and the boat turned ahead of the wind.
Jessa squinted and saw land rushing up ahead of them.
“Hold on! We’re going straight onto the beach!” Kylin’s arms strained as she held the wheel.
The little boat headed straight for the sandy shore, and the wind shoved them forward so hard that even when the boat’s bottom hit shallow water it kept going, right into the shallowest part of the water. Kylin and Asol jumped out and together pulled the boat onto land, then Jessa got out and pushed from behind. Between the three of them they were able to pull it far from the water.
The wind made it hard to stand upright, and the sky was darkening fast. A crack of light lit the sky and sent a spray of ocean into the air, making Jessa jump.
Kylin and Asol grabbed gear from the boat, and Kylin threw Jessa her bag. They ran into the cover of the trees, but the wind was making the branches thrash and sweep in a frenetic dance of danger.
“Your domicile unit?” Kylin yelled.