by M. Malone
I wasn’t sure if I was supposed to pretend like it was no big deal or send him a fruit basket for rocking my world. But it undoubtedly made things strange now that we were back in the real world.
Did I kiss him hello now?
Were we going to sleep in the same bed every night?
More importantly, would it happen again?
The whole ride back to the penthouse, Oskar barely said a word. I couldn’t help but take a little mental ride back to the last time I saw him this quiet. To be fair, he was drunk and so was I. Vegas had a way of causing people to either go crazy or get very introspective and confess their deepest thoughts. Sometimes simultaneously.
But I didn’t have the right to ask him what was going on in his head. Not yet. Just because we’d slept together, it didn’t make us a couple. Especially since he hadn’t said anything about the prior night.
Oh God.
Maybe this was his way of indicating that he didn’t want to do it again. He’d rocked my world but that didn’t mean the feeling was mutual. The sex might have been boring for him, and now he was working out a way to let me down easy. This was a pity silence.
No. I squashed all the self-defeating thoughts and forced myself to remember who I was dealing with. Oskar wasn’t the type to tiptoe around his feelings. If he hadn’t been into it last night, he would have just said so. And I might not have a lot of experience, but even I knew that having multiple orgasms, for both partners, was an indication that a good time was had by all.
But something was definitely wrong with him. I snuck another look at him. His profile gave nothing away. He was completely focused on the road.
After another five minutes, I finally couldn’t take it anymore.
“Did something happen today?”
He laughed, but it was a bitter sound. “A lot of things happened today. You’re going to have to be more specific.”
“Is this about last night?”
I held my breath waiting for his answer. It would stink if he didn’t want a repeat, but at least it was better to know than to get the cold shoulder.
“No, it’s not about last night. But we probably should talk about that. Later. We should talk about that later.” He made a face but then clamped his lips closed again.
My heart sank. Okay, maybe my earlier assumption that Oskar would just tell me if he wasn’t happy wasn’t true. Because there was obviously something about last night that he was keeping from me. And it didn’t seem like a positive memory.
“Well, I know it’s none of my business but the last time you were this quiet, you were trying to figure out how to tell me we got tattoos while we were drunk.”
He froze, and something about the expression on his face made me very nervous. “Funny you should mention that. How much do you remember about Vegas?”
I looked out the window, letting my eyes roam over the other cars and the pedestrians as we passed by. New York City at night used to be one of my favorite things but ever since the attack, it had lost some of its magic. Now I preferred to view the city from a bit of a distance. The windows in my apartment were perfect.
If I ever got to see them again, that is.
“I remember everything about Vegas.”
“Not everything,” he muttered.
Now that made me angry. If he didn’t want to be close to me anymore, that was fine. I got it and the rational part of my brain agreed. Considering our history and how easily we both lost control when around each other, I could respect his wish to keep some distance. But he wasn’t going to invalidate my memories and my experiences.
Vegas was a bad memory for me, only because it had started with such promise just to have it all crash and burn at the end. Those three days made up the most maddening, exhilarating, tender, and heartbreaking time of my life.
It had been three years, and every moment was so vivid it felt like it had happened just a few months ago instead of years.
If I was honest with myself, those times would probably be the most exciting I would ever have. How depressing was that?
“Listen, you may not want to be friends with me. Or lovers. Or anything. But don’t make the mistake of thinking that you have me figured out. I remember Vegas like it was just this past weekend. Getting ditched by the man you’re pretty sure you’re falling in love with tends to leave a lasting impression.”
The words hung in the air between us, and my breathing increased as I realized what I’d just said. Oskar looked over at me for as long as he could before his attention was pulled back to the road.
“You were in love with me.”
“That’s not what I said,” I insisted. Even though it kind of sort of was exactly what I’d said.
We arrived back at Blake Security a few minutes later, and Oskar pulled into the same parking spot he always used in the back. I didn’t wait for him before pushing open my door and getting out. I was humiliated enough that I’d just shouted that I was in love with him, but I definitely didn’t need the uncomfortable song and dance that was sure to come as he figured out how to tell me that he’d never felt the same.
“Hailey—”
“We don’t need to talk about it. Let’s just go.”
“Before we go upstairs, there’s something you need to know. While we were in Vegas we did a lot of things.”
Embarrassed and tired, I crossed my arms impatiently. “I know. We got really drunk. We had a lot of sex. My idea. And we got the worst tattoos ever. Pretty sure those were your idea.”
“I deny that,” Oskar drawled. “But what’s undeniable is that we did other things that neither of us remembers. One of those things was get married.”
15
Oskar
She was in shock. She had to be. Or at least that was what I assumed since Hailey hadn’t said a word to me since I’d dropped the matrimonial truth bomb.
I followed her as we walked from the parking lot into the elevator and finally into the penthouse. Someone must have been looking out for me because for once, no one was there when we got home. Or if they were, they were in their rooms.
Seeing Matthias right then would have been a bad fucking road. Not that it was his fault. Logically I knew it wasn’t. But I wasn’t in the mood to see that smug face right then. Not when Hailey looked like she’d just been coldcocked with a two-by-four.
“Say something. Please.” I closed the door behind us once we were in my room.
Hailey dropped her bag by the door, for once not bothering to put it carefully away. Her shoes came off next, abandoned in the middle of the floor. She sat on the edge of the bed, her eyes far away.
“I don’t know what to say. We’re married.” She whispered the last part, sounding horrified.
I would take offense to that if I didn’t understand her position completely. Being the other half of this surprise marriage equation, I got the horror. Most of us felt as though we at least knew who we were and what our lives were about. Finding out something this important years after the fact just felt wrong. Like a betrayal except we had no one to blame.
Well, I was going to blame this one on Vegas. That city had a way of fucking with you even years after you’d left.
“I know this is a shock. Matthias just told me today. Well, he told the whole damn team. Seemed pretty happy to fuck with my head.”
Hailey’s eyes latched onto mine. “So you had no idea about this?”
“Of course not. You think I wouldn’t have said anything? Like, ‘oh, hi Hailey. Nice to see you again, wifey’?”
She cringed. “Good point. That was a dumb question, but I’m trying to work out in my head how we could be married but have no idea. I remember that weekend.”
“So do I. But I have to admit I mainly remember us being naked for a really long time. I wasn’t particularly inclined to care about what happened before we got to that point.”
We shared a brief, private smile. Yeah, my memories of that sex-fueled weekend were pretty stellar. Nothing could top losing all y
our inhibitions with someone you were crazy compatible with. I coughed, trying to think of anything other than Hailey naked.
Not the time, dude. She was finally talking to me again, and the glassy look had cleared from her eyes. I didn’t think a big eyeful of my hard dick was going to be the best way to keep this conversation going.
Suddenly Hailey gasped. “Oh my God. That was our honeymoon. That’s why there were so many champagne bottles everywhere when we woke up. We were celebrating.”
I thought back to the aftermath of that weekend. She was right. There had been a crazy number of bottles strewn around the room on Sunday afternoon, but I’d just assumed we’d kept ordering it because it was Hailey’s favorite or something.
It hadn’t seemed that odd that Drunk Oskar would want to order his lady’s favorite drink. But apparently Drunk Oskar was actually ordering his wife more champagne to celebrate their honeymoon.
Drunk Oskar was a romantic. Surprise, surprise.
“I know this is a shock. But really, it’s not that big of a deal. We can fix it.”
Hailey’s eyes swung to me, as sharp as daggers. “Not that big of a deal? Oskar, we’re married. Joined in holy matrimony. Everything about that is a big deal. And you saying that just proves how little we know about each other.”
Hailey
The next morning was awkward.
Looking at Oskar brought up way too many unresolved feelings, none of which I was ready to examine or deal with yet. And I suspected that he felt the same since he seemed more than happy to leave when Ryan showed up at lunchtime to relieve him.
I sighed. He hadn’t offered much more than some vague excuse as to why he was leaving early, and I didn’t ask. Although he had promised to be back in time to pick me up since I was working late tonight before picking up my best friend from the airport.
Despite everything I smiled. Priya’s visit couldn’t have come at a better time. Not only did I need a distraction from Oskar and all this craziness, but she would be able to help me figure out what to do next. My best friend’s usual brand of no-bullshit advice was exactly what I needed right then.
A quick glance at the time in the upper corner of my computer screen told me that it was already past six o’clock. The final proofs I was waiting on from the art department should be along any time now.
Normally I would have been annoyed to be stuck at the office waiting on something that was actually due a few days ago but that night, I was glad for the distraction.
It was better than going back to the Blake Security penthouse and having to put on a smiling face for everyone else. Or having to try to avoid Oskar when we were living in the same place.
“Hailey! You’re still here.”
I looked up to see my dad standing in the doorway holding a small cardboard box. When he noticed where I was looking, he held it up.
“Just dropping off some samples the R&D team wanted you to evaluate. I didn’t think you’d actually be here though. You’ve been leaving earlier the past week.”
Something about that made my back stiffen. I stayed late all the time, so it felt odd that he was only noticing the days when I left at a decent hour.
“I left earlier since that was easier for my security. You know, the security you insisted that I have.”
He nodded. “I’m glad things are working out. I feel much better knowing you’re protected. So why are you here so late tonight? Is everything confirmed for the launch party?”
“Everything is on track. You don’t need to worry.”
“Have you confirmed with the event venue that they’ll have adequate security?”
I nodded. “Yes, they provide security, and I’ve also arranged for our own as well.”
He looked around and rocked back on his heels. “Good. Good. I’m sure things will be perfect. So why are you still here? You should go home and relax. Or go out with your friends and have some fun.”
I stared at him in confusion. What alien had taken over my father’s body? Because there was no other explanation for why he’d encourage me to go out and be frivolous instead of working on things that mattered.
“The art department will be delivering the final art any moment now. That’s what I’m waiting on.”
“What? The launch is only a week away!”
I put up my hands. “We’re well aware. They were just making a few minor adjustments that I asked for.”
He sighed. “I’m worried about you, Hailey. You’ve always been a perfectionist, but this launch seems to have taken over your life.”
Even though I knew his words were coming from a genuine place, something about it enraged me. Wasn’t this what he’d taught me? All my life, I’d looked up to my father and wanted to be just like him. Well, mission accomplished. I was a chip off the old block. I worked hard every night and then went home to work some more. I’d given everything to this company, and now he was telling me that was wrong?
“You’re calling me a workaholic? I guess I got it honestly then since you’re the same way.”
My father looked up sharply at my pointed words. “Excuse me, young lady?”
I could feel the emotion rising and saw myself as if I was floating above us. How had I gotten to this point? Yelling at my father, being short with my staff. But I knew that it was my anger at Oskar taking over my life. He wasn’t here for me to yell at, so I was taking it out on everyone else.
Which wasn’t right. It wasn’t me.
It was rare for us to argue, but even rarer for me to speak to him like that. I was raised to respect my elders and to think before I spoke. Usually I could handle anything, but it was clear that I’d lost all my composure.
And I knew exactly who to blame for it.
It was time for me to leave before we said things we couldn’t take back.
“I’m sorry, Dad. I appreciate what you’re saying. Really, I do. But I’m doing what I’ve been taught my whole life to do. This is what I’m good at, and I’m proud of what I’ve accomplished here.”
He ran his hands over his face. For the first time in a long time, I looked at my dad and saw him without the rose colored glasses of a young child who worshipped her father. He looked tired. And older.
And maybe a little defeated.
“I know that, baby. I didn’t mean to imply otherwise. You have to know how proud I am of you.”
“I do. Thanks. I’m just working so hard on this launch because I want it to be special for Mom.”
A small smile tugged at his lips. “This is going to be our biggest launch yet. I can already tell.”
He walked out, but the low set of his shoulders proved that our argument had affected him as much as it did me. I hated to fight with anyone but least of all with the man I’d always admired most. I flopped back into my seat and threw the pen I was holding down. The clattering sound it made was mildly satisfying but not nearly enough to match the turmoil inside.
I would probably need a battering ram for that.
“Trouble in paradise, hmm?”
I looked up to see Evan leaning against the doorframe with a satisfied smirk on his face.
“Just a disagreement. It happens.”
He shrugged. “Never thought I’d see the day Miss Perfect didn’t immediately get her way. Must be hard having to come down to reality with the rest of us, huh?”
After the emotional showdown with my father, I was in no mood to deal with Evan’s crap. “Why do you hate me so much? You realize it’s not normal to enjoy seeing your own sibling having a hard time?”
He straightened his tie but wouldn’t meet my eyes. “I don’t hate you. It’s just hard to live in your perfect shadow sometimes.”
“I’m not perfect and I’ve never pretended to be. I wish we could be closer. You’re my big brother.”
When his eyes lifted to meet mine, there was something there I hadn’t expected to see. Remorse.
“Are those the test samples for the new perfume?”
I followed his gaze to
the conference table where my father had placed the box he’d brought up with him. Clearly Evan wasn’t in the mood for a big emotional conversation, and neither was I. But he’d never been one for small talk, so I’d take this conversational olive branch for what it was worth. Maybe if we could find some common ground, we could build a relationship outside of our worth to the company.
“Yes. Do you want to test them out with me? I haven’t had a chance to open them yet. I’d love your opinion.”
His eyes met mine, his shock evident. “My opinion?”
“Yeah. You know what Mom likes. Hopefully you can help me pick the one that you think would make her happiest.”
“Sure. I can do that.”
Together, we pulled out the ten vials that were inside the box. They were labeled with their predominant ingredient, and I put the floral notes together and the musky scents aside to test last. My nose had a harder time recovering between those. I went back to my desk and pulled out the small jar of coffee beans I always kept there to help clear my sense of smell between vials.
“Let’s try these first.” I offered Evan one of the floral vials first and then took a quick whiff after he was done.
“That reminds me of that weird piano teacher I had in eighth grade. Remember her?”
An image of an older woman with bright purple, cat-eye glasses made me laugh. “She used to sneak sips from her flask when she thought no one was looking!”
Evan’s laughter rumbled out of his chest, and he put a hand over the vial. “Not this one. I don’t need anything giving me flashbacks of that summer. I hated playing the piano after smelling all that lavender perfume for an hour straight every Wednesday.”
With a smile, I put the vial into a clear plastic baggie. “Okay that one is definitely out.”
After fifteen minutes of going back and forth between the samples, we were able to narrow it down to four vials. There was a quick knock on the door before Oskar stuck his head in.