So many people have alluded to the religious parts as improving that I think they must be, to a certain number of people, and I am very glad of that. I had a letter from Fr Johnson, but he had only got a little way, and wants to write again when he has read it all.119 I feel he may not wholly like it; his own religion is so unquestioningly devout and single-minded, and I don’t think he had ever been troubled with doubts. I fear he may think the ape irreverent, and much of Laurie’s thoughts & conversation, and other people’s. I should be very sorry if he was hurt by any of it, he is so old, and has been so kind to me, and such a constant correspondent for the last 6 years.
Reviews go on coming in; the best heading yet was ‘Mad camel plays a big part in unusual book’, which seems rather to overstate the camel’s part.
I hope you have time to enjoy this weather; each day begins with fog, which gradually clears and leaves warm sunshine. The trees in the parks are lovely & golden.
Very much love.
E.R.M.
20, Hinde House, Hinde St, W.1 30 October, [1956]
Dearest Jeanie,
… No, thank you, no flue. Of course if it was from the man I met at dinner last Thursday, I wouldn’t start it till this Thursday, so the danger isn’t over, but I don’t think I shall get it, I have imbibed so much Antistin this last week. No, I certainly shouldn’t let you come up, you would catch it; better feel morbid than get flue. Have you got an interesting book to read? This is the best antidote to brooding that I know. Especially a really exciting or interesting novel. If ever you are long without regular work, you must lay in a good supply of these; there are lots of them, as they needn’t be new of course. But I hope you will be able to begin work again soon. If not, I can bring you down some books, and you could also begin your Reminiscences. How exciting about the Palace on the 27th!120 I had been meaning to ask you when it was to be. How early in the day, though. You will have to start about 8.0, I suppose, much too early. What a mercy it wasn’t arranged for the time you were laid up! It is the chance of a lifetime. Perhaps if you had been ill, I should have been allowed to receive it for you, like posthumous V.C.s.
John Betjeman rang me up this morning to tell me that he had heard from Lady Elizabeth Cavendish, who accompanied Princess Margaret to Africa, that she (Princess M.) was absorbed in The T. of T. all the voyage, and kept reading bits of it aloud to her companions…. Later I met Lady E.C. at lunch, and she told me this herself, adding that all the officers on the Britannia had a copy with them, and all were absorbed in it: this, I think, must be an over-statement. (I didn’t hear that the crew read it.) I feel this is real fame, to be read aloud by royalty. She said she would like to meet me. As a matter of fact, I have met her once, at Mark Bonham Carter’s wedding reception. My head will be quite swollen if this goes on. The Cabinet, the Bench of Bishops, Royalty, half Crockford, a number of the Roman hierarchy—why not the Pope before long? Nasser too, I hope, and possibly Krushchev. It might do these last two good. I went to a meeting of Hungarian protest on Sunday,121 all very eager & noisy. It was got up by Arthur Koestler, to express sympathy. I see that undergraduates are already dashing off to Hungary with medicines for the wounded, and having a grand time. And now Israel invading Egypt. I hear we have a battleship outside Port Said, waiting; I wish it would go away and not meddle.
I saw a splendid film yesterday, The Battle of the River Plate, in Technicolor. Really beautiful, & most life-like. The final self-scuttling of the Graf Spee was a splendid sight. So were the battleships and the ocean and Montevideo harbour. Awful killing and wounding by shells, of course, and after the battle would the captain and commanders and other officers have seemed quite so jubilant, with all that agony on board? The German commander, Langsdorff, was made a humane and nice man, who treated all his merchant-sailor captives kindly, as actually he did, fortunately….
I have a letter from Fr Johnson, much vexed with The Times Lit. Sup. for saying I had not so far found an answer to my religious problems.122 He says I have, and that I ought to write to the T.L.S. and say so.
Very much love for the Saints & Souls. Can you get to church for them?
E.R.M.
20, Hinde House, Hinde St, W.1 Gunpowder Plot [5 November], 1956
Dearest Jeanie,
Thank you so much for my first paintbox, which seems to have every needful colour for castle, earth, rocks, sky, sea & trees.123 The gold for the star and for the streak of dawn in the sky I can get in a little pot separately. Thank you so much, I hope it wasn’t expensive, let me know when I come. It is hard to find the gold streak in the sky at present. Our Mass this morning at St Paul’s was a requiem, praying for those who were being killed in Hungary and those going to be killed soon in Egypt, and praying very sadly for those in authority,3 that they might behave well and wisely. But, having already behaved so ill and unwisely,124 is there much hope of change? I understood Gaitskell to mean that the Tories should have a new P.M.125 But, if Eden resigns, his government would and there would have to be an election. After all, the whole Cabinet was involved in this madness, and not one of them has resigned so far; Nutting wasn’t in the Cabinet, of course.126 The Universities are being useful in protesting; so are the clergy. Canon Collins rang me on Friday night at 10.30 about the protest Christian Action had drafted for the Press; he sent it me later, and I made some suggested alterations, which several people are doing. Of course it won’t affect anything, but I think the more Christian protests are made the better. Of course the R.C.s will be too full of Hungary to bother much about Egypt, except for a few individuals, such as Lord Pakenham, Christopher Hollis, and any Liberal or Labour ones. The Observer was v.g., and said all we wanted. I think the opposition is so wide & strong that Eden can’t go on with it long….
What nonsense [some people do]… talk. It sounds so second hand, the kind of thing the clergy repeat in pulpits, that the one thing God can’t forgive is despair. Why should it be? And how... [is one to] know, anyhow? When one sees the appalling things done all the time, despair seems a very mild offence. I should say God would far rather Eden despaired than attacked Egypt. I hope E. will now despair a bit, after all that has been said about him. I rather wish the Labour members wouldn’t behave like angry taxi-drivers, all that booing, cat-calling and gesticulating. Still, I suppose most of them are brought up to be expressive when angry, and it adds colour to the scene. I’m glad we get these frequent news bulletins. Each time I hope we shall hear Eden’s voice apologising and saying he sees he made a terrible mistake and has ordered the immediate recall of planes & troops, since he sees that people don’t mostly like it. But they say that being attacked makes him more obstinate, and the troops seem to be ‘getting on very well’, as the [ Evening] Standard puts it.
My Xmas card verses aren’t very good, still they are about the picture, and about Christmas.127 I foresee not sending any of them, if this war develops. Already people are raiding petrol, in case of rationing. A few more oil-pipes cut, and we are for it. Then I shall have to go to weekday Mass next door at the R.C. church, usually, as walking a mile each way so early is too tiring, and bicycling too chilly. But I can’t really believe in a war, can you? I think it will be over in a week or two—tho’ the disgrace won’t.
Very much love.
E.R.M.
20, Hinde House, Hinde St, W.1 [4 December, 1956]
Dearest Jeanie,
... I return this foolish Postal Order, as, if we are to begin paying one another for all hospitality received, I owe you far more than this for all my fish dinners at Romford. I won’t start discussing whether you really think we should all pay each other for hospitality, as I am sure you don’t. If we started that, I should be ruined soon, with all the lunches, dinners, drinks etc. that I go to with people. I don’t even repay them in kind, as I seldom give parties myself; I ought to more. I am now just going out to lunch at the Café Royal, then tea at St Paul’s Deanery with the Dean,128 and later dinner at someone’s house, so it would, according to you, be a
n expensive day for me. The only thing I shouldn’t pay for is the Messiah in St Paul’s after tea, which is free. Princess Margaret will also be at tea 8c Messiah. I shall sit far back and leave early, as the Messiah is too long.
… [Dorothea] certainly does plenty of thinking about T. of T. I don’t know where she finds that Laurie and Vere were getting tired of each other; they weren’t, actually.
The Doubt man was good last week.129 Now we have Bp Wand who looks for the Second Coming any minute, which must make life most exciting for him. I expect he hopes for it before his death, which would save him a lot of bother about his will, tidying up etc. I should like this too, but have no hopes for it. It would be so nice all to go out together, as by nuclear bomb only more so. He sounded as if he had no doubts about it. I wonder how many people think this.
I expect Miss B——knows far more than I do about how to take a Greek course, as she has been a teacher. Does she know any Greek yet? I wonder if she has night schools or Polytechnic courses within reach; if not, I suppose she could do it all with books. It seems a very good idea. My Greek is slight, but I should like to improve it if ever I get time. Today we celebrated Clement of Alexandria, with a good lesson on Wisdom, which was his great theme. But of course he’s not a classic. It is useful to have the Loeb translations of Homer, Aristotle, Plato, Thucydides, etc., where the Greek is printed down the page parallel with the English, so it is easy to follow.
I enclose the Times sermon, good; (stickiness on back is where my pot of gold paint stood on it while I painted my card. I must bring some on Friday to do; I get on very slowly, and shall never do all; many recipients will be Goats, who only get a plain card.)
I may get a cold tonight; tiresome hostess rang up to say they both have bad colds, and did I mind? I said was it flue, because I wouldn’t come if so; she said no, only colds; so I shall inhale Antistin before & after & trust in God, who I hope will play up.
Very much love…. People have gone petrol-mad, and there are long queues at every garage, great bitterness, great bribery.
E.R.M .
27 December, [1956]
Dearest Jeanie,
I got home yesterday afternoon in good time, fortified by a delicious cup of soup made by Nancy from genuine chicken. I feel like a man I heard saying in a shop this morning ‘Yes, thank you, I had a nice Christmas. Quiet, you know, but plenty to eat. Now I have to spend the week working it off.’ I feel like that too, after all your delicious food, especially the Xmas dinner. I’ve not yet worked that off, tho’ I went out this morning to 7.30 Mass at St James’s near me, & have since been trying to clear the flat of Xmas litter. R.C. Mass is much less congregational than ours, the people don’t even join in the creed, and the priest mutters it; it would be more audible in one of the side chapels, no doubt. But on the whole I feel the Reformation was an improvement, especially now that it has, in this country, righted itself a little and allows of attractive services. Though, if I had to choose between the type of C. of E. in St Paul’s, Portman Square, close to me, and an R.C. church, the R.C. would win every time….
I am worried about you, and shall be until I hear that you can stop work. Do let me know when you hear.130 Nancy is much worried too. She doesn’t think you are at all well.
One thing I hope you will never worry about at all is money. I, as I said, would like, if you will let me, to take over all your current covenants. (Not of course officially, but I would pay you the money.) Will you consider this, and tell me how much they are. Remember I have oodles of money, and they are all things I would wish to subscribe to (presumably). Please let me know how much it would be, when next I come. It is a serious thing to be deprived of one’s salary suddenly, having already made commitments.131 If you got into touch with my brokers… they would do a lot in the way of improving your finances, selling one thing to buy a better thing, etc. etc. It is worth while...
Except Alan Pryce-Jones, who spoke up for me, the speakers on novels last night didn’t care for mine,132 they thought it facetious and didn’t like religion, sin etc. in novels. Of course some people don’t, though so many people do that it was unlucky my getting these. They didn’t like ‘High Anglicanism’, or jokes about it….
[The end of this letter is missing]
20, Hinde House, Hinde St, W.1 26 January, [1957]
Dearest Jeanie,
... I thought the ‘Lift up your Hearts’ this week rather poor. I hoped he was going to deal with the difficulties and attempts at reunion, and hopes for the future, not with six men who only started World Councils etc., or did mission work. He didn’t even give Temple’s views on intercommunion. Year after year they go on fiddling round the subject, never getting anywhere. This evening I may go to the… church with the spiteful remark about South India on the door, as there is a good man preaching, though I wouldn’t if I were he. It would be wonderful if he broke out about how unchristian such an attitude is. The vicar couldn’t stop him of course.
I have been asked by two bishops to write a play about the Church of the Future, for acting at a congress at Cheltenham in October. Of course I shan’t. I get asked to do the oddest things now. I wasn’t asked to give my views on Immortality in the Sunday Times series, and shouldn’t anyhow have done it. I enclose Dorothy Sayers, which is rather interesting.133
It was nice to see Mr Carpenter134 again on Friday evening. He is nearly 80 now, but very little changed. He has retired from being Dean of Exeter, and lives near it and lectures & writes. It was to him that I made my last confession, in 1921 or 2, before giving it up for 30 years. He always had a very nice sense of humour, and tells amusing stories about people.
Rebecca West has sent me her new novel,135 & I have partly read it. It is very well told and interesting. I must write to her now….
Be careful, it is getting colder.
Very much love.
E.R.M.
20, Hinde House, Hinde St, W.1 3 March, 1957
Dearest Jeanie,
I thought you might like to see the Pope’s latest medical pronouncement.136 Also, the Times Saturday sermon, and the account of the wave of R.C. conversions. They are really rather striking. I put them down mainly to a desire for novelty and change, as more exciting than the familiar C. of E. and dissent. Will Britain become a popish country? Much more so than at present, I think. But, in about 50 years, that too will be familiar, and there may be a swing back towards C. of E. People do like a change. And it’s much more important to most people to have an interesting religion, with plenty of fuss and doings and pageantry, than one they can really and truly believe with their reasons. Will they get some C. of E. churches back, I wonder. Better give them some than let them stand empty. It will be interesting if it becomes really fashionable in all classes. The fresh influx of converts may in the end have a modifying effect on the doctrines taught.
I went to evening service at All Saints’ [Margaret Street] today, & came in for an adult baptism, but was too far away to see how it was done. They had the whole baptism service, and the candidate said she renounced them all, and all this she faithfully believed. After it the vicar preached about it, and how it was a new life; it seems she had for some time worshipped there, but hadn’t been a Church member. Next Sunday she will be confirmed, so then she will be all set for the Christian life. The vicar said that however often she might sin in future, she can seek forgiveness and be restored. I gathered he thinks it little use to seek forgiveness if not baptised. I wonder if she found it embarrassing to be preached about, but perhaps she liked it, and it was her finest hour. It’s a pity most of us have it too young to feel pleased or new; I think baptism should really be at 8 or 9, when they can understand it; it might be a great romance and fresh start, and they would be too young to be sceptical, as one sometimes is at confirmation. Mother would have made us very enthusiastic about it.
What a marvellous spring day, the March sun feels like May. I hope you have enjoyed it by bicycling about a little. I ran my new car about round the p
arks, and took two nice young Germans from the Embassy a little way.137 They had come to St Paul’s, [Knightsbridge] as they have discovered Anglicanism and are enthusiastic about it. I introduced them to the vicar138 after Mass. One of them said ‘What a charming man: he reminds me of a witty Jesuit priest I know in the Rhineland.’ In the Rhineland he said they dance all Shrove Tuesday, after being shriven. We told the vicar he should introduce Ash Wednesday ashes at Mass; he wasn’t sure if the curate would like it, or if all the congregation would.139 I am sending you Time and Tide, with my Lent article in it,140 as it may be helpful….
I must sit up a little later in Lent, to get my Hour141 done as well as everything else. Is this the fast that I have chosen? Perhaps it ought to be going to Mass at 7.30 instead of 8.15 or 8.30; but I draw the line at that. Did you hear a talk about being 70?142 People seem to feel they are very old at 70. I don’t, at all, tho’ I know I am.
Very much love.
E.R.M.
19 March, [1957]
Dearest Jeanie,
... I send your sermon ration for the week, including one of the Survival series by an Indian.143 I am using up some of my daily Hour by copying out Fr Waggett’s Holy Week addresses, that I began last year….
I wonder why poor Tilsley cut his throat144; I suppose a mental breakdown. I can’t believe that any one in his sensefs] would choose that way, it would be so difficult and painful, and there are so many easy ways….
Did you hear a discussion on the 3rd programme about imprisonment the other day? I was invited to hear it, at the Aquinas Centre145; I never think those Disputations are v.g. It seemed to shirk the point of punishment, they talked about ‘restoring the moral law’, when surely the point is deterrence and prevention….
Very much love.
Letters to a Sister Page 16