by Zen DiPietro
Fallon was slightly less eager to get started. “No, thank you. Mostly we want to stay out of the way and not cause you any problems.”
“Don’t worry about that,” Jerin assured her. “We take care of ourselves very well here. Now, if you’ll lie down?” She indicated the techbed.
“Right.” Fallon sat, then swung her legs up and settled back. Time to get to work.
“You’ve recovered no memories since the surgery I performed?” Brak moved to the techbed controls.
“No. Well, I did say something which my team told me was a phrase we use, but I think it was probably a coincidence.” She’d blurted out their team motto while Hawk was suffering from serious injuries. But it was really just two words tacked onto something she’d already heard. Probably nothing.
“Did you say it out of context?” Jerin asked.
“I suppose it was in context. But it didn’t feel like a memory.”
“Hm.” Jerin joined Brak at the head of the bed.
After a minute of silence, Fallon asked, “Should I be doing something here?”
“Just relax,” Jerin answered, the smooth melody of her voice a calming thing all by itself. “We’re going to administer a light sedative. You know how you start dreaming sometimes, just as you’re dozing off?”
“Sure.” Fallon stared up at the ceiling.
“That’s because when you turn off active thought, the brain begins functioning on its own. Your brain works much harder when you’re asleep than when you’re awake. Once you’re in a semiconscious state, I’ll talk to you while Brak monitors your brain activity.”
“Okay.” Fallon hoped she wouldn’t say anything too sensitive or embarrassing. The idea of talking in her sleep with no filter did not sit entirely comfortably. But she’d lick the exhaust manifold on a Rescan freighter if she thought it would bring back her memory.
“Administering the sedative now,” Jerin murmured. “Just relax and let your thoughts roam.”
Let her thoughts run free. Sure. She closed her eyes and tried, but intentionally becoming dreamy did not seem to be her strong suit. So she stared up at the ceiling again, visually measuring it in centimeters, meters, and millimeters in width, height, and on the diagonal. Each measurement flowed into the next and she felt increasingly relaxed.
She wondered if measuring the ceiling might be an old habit of hers, perhaps a strategy against insomnia. She tried to imagine herself as a child, doing the same thing, and couldn’t. She tried to imagine herself as a child at all. She might have been a cute kid. Had she worn dresses, or preferred pants? She willed any childhood images to appear.
“How are you feeling?” Jerin’s voice pierced through her.
Fallon jolted and sat up. Infirmary. Jerin and Brak. No imminent danger.
It was a bad feeling, though. The last time she’d bolted awake in an infirmary, she hadn’t even known her own name. Okay, well, technically she still didn’t know the name she’d been born with, but her Blackout name was plenty enough for her. She’d earned that name.
Fallon pressed a hand to her chest, as if she could still her racing heart that way. “Did I fall asleep?”
“Not exactly.” Jerin came around the side of the bed. “Everything went as planned.”
“Did you find out anything?”
“You said many things. Some definitely not real, and some things that could possibly be real. But none of that is what matters. If we managed to reach any real memories, those neural pathways have been reestablished and those remembrances should return to you.”
“So we wait. Again.” Scrap. Not the result she’d hoped for.
Brak stepped to the other side of the bed. “Yes. Three days, then we can do this again.”
“How many sessions before you declare me hopeless?”
Jerin chuckled. “Probably more than you’d be willing to do. This is all at your direction. If you want to keep going, we will. If you want to quit, we will.”
“Fair enough.” She twisted herself around, putting her feet on the ground to stand. “I guess I’ll let you know if I recall anything.”
“Don’t be discouraged,” Brak advised. “Hypnotherapy is not something that often works the first time. Or the second. It’s a slow and gentle, long-term kind of thing.”
“I’d be fine with quick and brutal,” she admitted, “so long as it worked.”
Jerin’s eyes held sympathy. “I wish there were such an option. Memory is a delicate thing.”
“Yeah.” She shook her head to get herself refocused. “So when can we start on this new gym?”
Fallon had new appreciation for the jumpsuits she and her team wore. Throughout an entire day of picking stuff up, piling it onto anti-grav carts, and moving it all into Cargo Bay One, the suits had stood up to the rigorous bending, lifting, and sweating beautifully, while providing perfect comfort. Well, other than a couple of sneezes caused by dust.
“Guess we can count this as our workout for the day.” Hawk placed a huge bin on the cart without any apparent effort.
“Only if you work up a sweat,” Peregrine answered. “You need to step it up.”
“Oh, I wanted to leave a little for you all to do. You know, so you can feel like you’ve contributed.” He stacked another bin on top of the first.
Raptor snorted out a laugh. “If you worked as much as you talked, we’d be done by now.”
“I’m pretty sure Kellis’ opinion of us is getting lower by the hour.” Fallon looked to the engineer, who had taken numerous measurements and now sat on the floor in one corner, drawing out plans on an infoboard.
“Nah, I think you guys are hilarious,” Kellis piped up, not lifting her eyes from her infoboard.
“Well, damn, that’s not at all what I was going for.” Hawk bowed his shoulders in comedic dejection. “I was hoping for powerful. Impressive. Maybe even heroic.”
“Sorry.” Kellis’ unapologetic apology caused both Fallon and Peregrine to grin.
“How are the plans looking?” Fallon asked, adjusting the cart’s controls for a heavier load.
Kellis finally looked up. “Good. I’m working at maximizing the space to provide the different types of activities you guys suggested. I think this is going to be great for the ship. We don’t exactly have a lot of rec areas, and our quarters don’t provide much space for socializing, either.”
Her tawny curls framed her face, hanging just below her jawline. The color of her hair set off arrestingly vivid turquoise eyes. A visit to the salon on Dragonfire must have resulted in the new golden highlights. Fallon liked the addition. It complemented Kellis’ tan skin, which shone like sun-bleached sand.
“We’re sure you’ll create something great,” Raptor assured Kellis, who smiled at him.
“I’ll do my best. Finishing off my degree would be a relief. I’ve been doing double shifts, between work and school, ever since I joined the Onari.”
“How long ago was that?” Fallon asked, testing the load on the cart to make sure it wouldn’t shift as she pulled it to the other cargo bay. She already knew the answer to her question, but she wanted to get to know Kellis better in the conventional way.
“About a year ago now. A little less.”
“That’s a long time to pull double shifts!” Hawk stopped stacking for a moment, rolling a shoulder. Fallon suspected he might be working harder than he let on. “What will you do with all that extra time?”
Kellis laughed. “Work a little less. Sleep a little more. Start working out here. I’ve been using Trin’s physical therapy room when it’s not in use. The treadmill is great, but I’ve had to be creative with strength training.”
“I haven’t known too many engineers into strength training.” Peregrine paused between bins too, to join the conversation.
Kellis looked down and her hair shifted to cover part of her face. “I got an injury in the war on my planet. Not from fighting or anything,” she qualified hastily. “Wrong place, wrong time, is all. But I was in a wheelchair
for a while, and since getting better, I make sure not to take my body for granted.”
Fallon found that highly admirable. Kellis must have worked very hard to escape her beginnings and establish a new future for herself. She surely had some luck on her side, too. Many Atalans still remained trapped on their world, caught between opposing factions bent on domination. Fallon was glad Kellis and Arin had managed to get free of it.
She grasped the cart’s control handle and gave it a small twist, putting it into glide mode. “All right. I’ll move this one over and then we can clear up the little bit that’s left.”
“And then lunch!” Hawk called after her as she guided the cart into the corridor.
Lunch sounded terrific. A long lunch sounded even better. Would it be wrong to have some Zerellian ale at midday? She knew perfectly well that afterward, they’d be unloading everything they’d moved into Cargo Bay One and getting it organized neatly. Assembling was always harder than tearing down, and she wasn’t looking forward to that part. An ale or two might make it more pleasant. Her back was already feeling the effects of their labors.
Not that she was going to let on. Hawk would never let her hear the end of it.
Two more days of grunt labor had Cargo Bay Two ready for its refit and Cargo Bay One organized. In the infirmary, Fallon was ready for another crack at hypnotherapy.
“You haven’t had any hints of memory?” Jerin’s dulcet voice settled over Fallon like a warm, silky blanket.
She shifted, getting comfortable on the techbed. “Nope. Not a thing.”
“Altogether expected,” Jerin assured her, then moved out of sight to join Brak at the techbed controls. “We’ll proceed just as we did last time.”
An hour later, Fallon drifted up from what felt like a momentary loss of concentration. She turned her head to look back at the doctors, only to have a sharp pain slice into her back. She sucked in a breath through her teeth.
“What’s wrong?” Brak suddenly stood over her, and Jerin moved into view as well.
“Muscle spasm in my back. All that lifting in the cargo bay is catching up to me.”
Jerin returned to the techbed controls. “Yes, I see a rather nasty little spasm there. We’ll get that sorted for you right now. Lie very still, please.”
Fallon forced herself not to move, even though the stabbing sensation in her back made her want to slide right off the bed.
The pain bled away, and she found herself relaxing.
“Better?” Jerin asked, a smile in her voice.
“Much.”
“It was only a strained muscle. I’ve repaired it, as well as a few others, just to be sure they won’t bother you. Brak, would you mind getting a cup of biogel?”
“Not at all.” Brak bobbed her head and moved to a cabinet near the door. She returned holding a clear cup full of a thick, transparent liquid.
Fallon downed it. The sharp tang of its aftertaste echoed in her mouth. She handed the cup back to Brak.
“That will help keep you in good shape,” Jerin said, moving to face Brak on the other side of the techbed. “How are things going in my new rec center?” Humor crinkled her eyes.
Fallon sat up. She hadn’t been about to complain of the soreness that had built up over the last couple days, as it had been so minor, but she did feel better now. More energetic, too.
“It’s going great. Kellis completed her plans for the refit, and we have the bay cleared. After she’s done working on something in ops control, we’re going to start laying down new flooring.”
“Ops?” Jerin raised an eyebrow. “I hadn’t heard of any issue. I’ll have to talk to Demitri about that.”
Fallon hopped off the table. “So, we’ll do this again in three more days?”
Jerin nodded. “I’d like to fit in two more sessions before we make it to Levana Prime. We’re expected to be there for a week, so nearly all the medical staff will be boots on ground for the duration.”
“Gotcha.” Fallon arched her back, enjoying the stretch. “Well, I’m going to get down to our rec center in progress and get started a little early, since I’m feeling so spiffy.”
“Let us know when we can see it,” Brak said. “I’m really looking forward to having a place to work out every day.”
“I will.” Fallon felt particularly gratified to be doing something that would please the friend who had done so much to help her. She went back to work with a boost of enthusiasm.
Fallon had grown steadily more impressed with Kellis as the days wore on. The engineer thoroughly researched every detail as she worked through the project. Each day she showed up with a plan, confident and ready to work. With her direction, they’d installed shock-absorbing floors and two-way soundproofing for the walls. In Cargo Bay One they’d created a new, more deliberate organization system, including clever built-in storage units that spanned the double-decker height of the bay. The ship wouldn’t suffer for storage space.
Which only left them with outfitting the rec center. Kellis had built five basic-but-sturdy treadmills. Fallon had no idea where she’d gotten the parts for them, but as long as no one came looking, she didn’t care. Kellis had also borrowed some auxiliary equipment from the physical therapy department for the short term, but Jerin would need to procure some actual resistance machines.
Jerin had resoundingly vetoed a sparring ring, making it clear that the Onari was in the business of healing injuries, not creating them. Kellis had engineered a fantastic climbing wall that went right up to the upper hull of the ship, though. Until they got some anti-grav vests for emergencies, climbing was restricted to the highly experienced only. Jerin had eloquently announced to the crew that anyone sustaining a serious injury would answer to her as soon as they were patched up. The woman could be downright menacing when she chose. Which made Fallon like her even more.
They’d managed to scavenge some furniture from storage, as well as other locations throughout the ship. Some people had even loaned their personal items, which impressed Fallon. That kind of generosity was hard to find. Jerin would get the rec center properly furnished and equipped as soon as she could, but Fallon and her team didn’t mind these little deficiencies one bit.
Fallon was pleased that Brak shared their enthusiasm. Day shift had ended, and the cyberneticist was due to arrive for her first look at the completed work any minute. Kellis had retired to her quarters, and Peregrine and Hawk had gone for food and drinks. Only Fallon and Raptor had remained, wanting to admire their creation a little longer.
Funny how the time had gone by with something to focus on. Nearly two weeks had passed since boarding the ship. It had felt good to just determine a goal and keep working at it until it was done. Especially with her team, as well as Kellis, alongside her. If only all work could be so straightforward.
Two more hypnotherapy sessions had produced no results, and the Onari was due to arrive at Levana Prime late tomorrow, after the end of the day shift.
The opening of the door interrupted Fallon’s musing. Brak entered, giving off the delicious scent of strawberries. She took a slow tour of the new rec center before announcing, “You all have done a remarkable job.”
Brak’s obvious pleasure pleased Fallon. Clearly, Brak saw past the mismatched furnishings to all the potential.
“I can’t wait to get started on that wall.” Brak eyed the apparatus with great interest.
“But will you? After Jerin’s warning?”
Brak smiled. “Of course I will. It’s not easy to break one of these bones.” She gestured at herself.
Fallon wished she believed in Second Life—the idea of her soul being reborn into another body after her death. If she had, she could’ve hoped to be reborn as a Briveen. Exceptional strength and dexterity, greater hearing and sight, and gorgeous scales to top it all off.
“I’d challenge you to a race to the top, but I’m guessing that racing goes past risky and into reckless.” A shame, because Fallon would have loved to see how she stacked up against B
rak at climbing.
“Wise.” Brak tilted her jaw upward and Fallon smelled the sweet musk of amusement.
Raptor hung midway up the wall as they approached. His broad shoulders and long, muscular limbs meant that he could brute force his way up using primarily his arms, while she’d have to use every centimeter of her body to make it happen. Ah, well. At least she got to admire him while he did it.
Brak glanced at her in a knowing way. Though she said nothing, Fallon had a sense that her friend had scented her appreciation. There was no hiding one’s feelings from a Briveen.
She shrugged. “So?”
Brak held her palms up in a display of innocence. “I didn’t say anything.”
“You didn’t have to.”
Brak let her hands drop. “He’s very good-looking, what’s not to admire?” Her head tilted as she watched Raptor, and it made Fallon wonder about her.
What the hell. She decided to ask. “Do Briveen ever get romantically involved with non-Briveen?”
“Only ones who leave Briv for good, and not usually, even then. So the answer’s pretty much no, with only a few exceptions.” Brak sounded very matter-of-fact.
“Hm. Well you’ve left Briv. What if your perfect match ended up being human, or Rescan, or something? Would you be willing to give it a try?”
Brak made a soft chortle of amusement, which sounded a lot like a growl to Fallon. But an amused growl. “Far be it from me to pass up the perfect guy.”
“Actually, now that we’re on the subject, I met a Briveen you might like. He had a great sense of humor and I felt like he didn’t care for the rituals any more than you do. He performed the basics, but no more. I sensed that he only did that much because he was an ambassador and felt responsible for upholding expectations.” Fallon had quite liked him.
“Who?”
“Honorable First Son Gretch of the House Arkrid.” He’d visited Dragonfire soon after Fallon had lost her memory.
“Arkrid. A respectable house. I don’t know any of them personally, though.”
“If all the stars line up, maybe someday I’ll get a chance to introduce you two. Wouldn’t that be something?”