by Madison Faye
I smile curiously. “Papa, what are you talking about.”
He sighs and looks away as he scratches his chin. “Aww heck, you’re old enough. I know I’ve mentioned that before your mama, I was lost, but you don’t know the half of it.” He starts to unbutton his shirt, and I frown curiously as he pulls it open to flash the tattoo ink of the cross over his heart.
“I’m, talking about this.”
I smile. “Papa, I’ve seen your tattoo plenty of times.”
He frowns. “Look closer.”
I wrinkle my brow and walk over to him, peering at his cross. “Papa, what am I—” And then, I see it. My jaw drops, and I’m not quite sure how I never noticed it before, but now that I’m scrutinizing closer, it’s hard to miss. There, under the cross adorned with thorns, is something else.
A motorcade wheel and handlebars face out.
He sees the recognition in my eyes, and he sighs and steps back. He undoes the rest of his buttons, and he shrugs his shirt off. I haven’t seen much of my father without a shirt on, because I know he’s not really proud of the tattoos on his shoulders and upper arms from when he was “younger and dumber” as he’s said with a chuckle before. This time though, it feels different. I start to really look at the ink, and I realize a lot of them are really just blacked out tattoos, or not so subtle roses and crosses covering other things up.
“Papa?” I whisper.
“When your mama met me, I was a mess,” he says darkly. “I mean a real, real mess, honey. I didn’t know God at all. I didn’t know love, didn’t think I had a soul, and thought life was one big ride until the end. Your mama, God bless her, saw that I was more than that. And I don’t mean to say she dragged my butt to church and made me talk to Jesus or anything.” He grins. “You know her. She wouldn’t force that on me. But she helped me see the truth, and the light.”
He takes a shaky breath. “She helped me get saved, honey. And she’s the reason I’m here today, alive, and not damned to Hell. I know that truly.”
I nod slowly, and he smiles. He picks his shirt up and pulls it back on and starts to button it back up. “So, whoever this person is? You want my opinion?”
I nod. “Yes.”
“See into them. See who they are and see who they could be. I’m not telling you to go stumping for someone who ain’t gonna be saved,” he chuckles. “But you’ve got a good heart and a good head on your shoulders. I trust that you can tell the difference between a truly lost soul and a soul that’s just lost its way. If it’s the second one, open up. If you can see a trace of love there, I think the Godly thing to do would be to help them, and to let them help you. I mean, your mama saved me, but I saved her too in my own way.”
He smiles.
“That make any dang sense at all, honey?”
I laugh, and I walk right over and hug him tightly.
“More than you know, Papa.”
He chuckles. “Well good. Oh, but Delilah?” His smile fades to a concerned frown. “Now if this is a boy we’re talking about, forget every damn thing I just said. That clear?”
I manage to restrain myself to a smile instead of a deep laugh, and I nod. “Understood, Papa.”
…Hey, what’s one more small lie, right?
Actually, it’s two more lies. After dinner, I tell my parents I’m going over to Melanie Krupa’s house for a small bible study before I run out the door in cutoff jean shorts and a big baggy “Christ Ministries 2015” t-shirt. Papa even lets me borrow his pickup. But once I pull the truck off the road out of town into the little clearing at the grassy field, I pull the t-shirt off to reveal the much less wholesome strappy tank-top underneath that I usually just wear to bed.
The engine turns off, and I take a shaky breath and look at myself in the rearview mirror. I blush as I fuss with my long hair, before I just leave it. I step out, close the creaky door, and look out across the dark field towards the tent and the Winnebago.
Even yesterday, I’d have said that I was looking towards damnation and Hell. Now, I’m not so sure. I’m not so sure about a lot of things, actually. And I’m pretty positive that my father’s talk earlier wasn’t exactly about what I’m pretty sure I’m about to do, but it’s shown me the way. It’s opened my eyes and taken the blinders off a bit more that I’ve been wearing my entire life.
Life is not just good or bad. People are not pure or evil. It’s all a spectrum, and I know in my heart, or at least I’m hoping that I know and that it’s not a misstep, that what’s happened with Gabriel isn’t purely a sin. It might not be good, but when I feel… well, the way I feel about him, that can’t all be sin, can it?
With one more shaky breath, I start walking across the field, my heart racing.
The tent is dark except for a neon blue sign above the pulpit that says “SAVED.” Past it, I hear a bubbling sound from behind the back wall, and I grin through the nervousness as I step around the corner. And there, sitting in his tub with his arms outstretched on the side, a bottle of whiskey in one hand, and his head lolled back, looking sinfully gorgeous, is Gabriel.
“Am I too late for the baptisms tonight?”
His head jerks up, and his brow arches. A small smile curls at the corners of his mouth, and I shiver at the fire that sparks over his face.
“Well,” he growls. “That all depends.”
“On?”
“On if there’s a posse of townsfolk behind you ready to string me up by the balls from the nearest tree.”
I grin. “Not tonight.”
He shrugs. “Well then, the church of Gabriel Marsden is open and ready to cleanse your mortal soul.”
I roll my eyes and smile before I glance at the bottle in his hands. “Are you drunk?”
He arches a brow. “I’m not not drunk,” he says in a way that makes me giggle. “But no, I’m not blasted if that’s what you’re asking. I’m trying out this new thing called restraint.”
“Oh, is that what yesterday was?”
No sooner have the words fallen from my lips than my cheeks burn hot and my lip catches between my teeth, shocked that I actually said it out loud.
He just smirks at me, though. “No, Delilah,” he purrs. “I’m pretty damn sure I wouldn’t call that restraint.”
I swallow thickly, and we eye each other—his sliding slowly over me as if just realizing what I’m wearing.
“What can I do for you?” he growls quietly.
“I—”
I rehearsed what I was going to say to him as I drove over here, but it all sounded lame and practiced. And none of it was really why I was coming here. The truth is, I don’t really know why I’m here, I just know that “here,” with him, is where I wanted to be. And if that alone is a sin, I believe I’ve made peace with that.
“I was hoping we could…” I frown. “I mean, I was hoping you would be able to…” I stammer and look down at my hands.
“Take a breath,” he says quietly. And I do, closing my eyes and breathing deep. And when I speak, my eyes are still closed.
“We spoke yesterday,” I say haltingly. “About one day me going someplace that isn’t Canaan, and being around, uh, things that I’m not used to.”
“We were,” he growls.
“And you said that maybe you could, uh, guide me?”
I look up and blush when I see his eyes burning into me.
“You’re dancing around the question,” he growls lowly. “What exactly do you mean?”
I take a long, shaky breath, every nerve in my body buzzing before I steel myself and grip my hands into fists.
“I mean this.”
Before my brain can catch up with me, I reach down, pop the button on my shorts, and push them down to my feet. I step out of my flip flops and the shorts, and then for the first time, I’m standing in front of a man in just a thin, bra-less tank top and a pair of red panties with white polka dots—nothing special, but they’re arguable the sexiest underwear I own.
Gabriel growls. I mean he literally growls d
eeply, like an animal, and I gasp as his eyes blaze over me.
“What are you doing, Delilah?”
“This,” I whisper. I march right over to the tub, climb the stairs and swing a leg over the edge into the bubbling water. The backstage area is dark except for the single light over the door to his Winnebago outside, and the dim blue glow of the “SAVED” sign on the other side of the wall, glowing up over the edge of it. I gasp at the heat of the water as I step all the way in and settle into the bubble tub. There’s a seat on my side, and I settle into it, the water burbling around my chin as my pulse races.
I smirk at Gabriel’s amused expression.
“Surprised?”
“A little,” he nods. He raises the bottle. “Drink?”
I shake my head. I might be a little crazy tonight, but I’m not that crazy.
He grins. “Didn’t think so. There’s Pepsi in the mini-fridge over there.” He nods at the small fridge plugged in to an extension cord under his table desk. I arch a brow and glance back at him.
“Um, can you get it?”
He laughs. “You can’t?”
“No!” I blush deeply.
“And why is that.”
“Um, because I’m in my underwear and a tank top.”
“And?”
I groan. “And I’m all wet, and I’m…” I blush. “And I’m not wearing a bra, and everything is going to be all… you know.”
He looks at me, and I sigh heavily.
“All see-through, okay?”
“Because your panties are all wet?”
My face turns crimson at the wolfish grin on his face.
“Look, forget it.”
Gabriel chuckles. “Alright, alright. I’ll get it for you. But only if you’re sure.”
“I’m quite sure,” I groan. “And thank you.”
He grins. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
My brow wrinkles. “Warn me about wh—” I shriek and quickly squeeze my eyes shut as he stands, revealing every freaking inch of his dripping wet, sculpted, inked, completely naked body.
“Gabriel!” I gasp. “You’re naked!”
He laughs. “Well why in the hell would I go in my own hot tub with clothes on?”
“A bathing suit?” I blanche.
He chuckles deeply. “You still want that Pepsi?”
“No thank you,” I groan through tightly shut eyes.
There’s a sloshing sound of him settling back into the water.
“You can open them.”
“Are you decent?”
“I’m naked two feet away from you in a baptism tub, Delilah,” he growls. “Not sure if that’s going to fly as ‘decent’ by any metric.”
I smile. “You know what I mean.”
“I do, but I’m thinking that might go against the spirit of this entire thing.”
I blush, but I slowly open my eyes. He is, in fact, sitting back in the water. “Meaning?”
“You want me to ‘show you sin?’” he growls. “You want me to be your damn coach for the real world out there?”
I swallow, nodding slowly.
“Then why shy away? I mean that was your shot—a guy with basically no shame willing to let you take a peek.”
I blush furiously. “Well, maybe I don’t want a peek.”
Gabriel grins. “Sure you do.”
I drop my eyes as the heat pours over me.
“At some point in life, I’m just saying, you’re gonna see a man naked.”
“Yes, my husband,” I say tersely.
He rolls his eyes. “You know what, this was a bad idea.”
I frown. “What? Why?”
“Because I don’t think you really know why you came here, and I think this is a bad idea.” He takes a slow pull from his whiskey. “And I think you should go.”
Screw it. I purse my lips, my heart racing. I know exactly why I came here tonight. I’ve just been tiptoeing around it. I’ve even been pretending to myself that it’s not why I’m here, but it is.
“You know why I’m here?”
“No, not really. I thought I made that pretty clear—”
“For this.”
I stand from the little submerged seat, and the water sloshes as I cross the distance to him. And before either of us can say a word, or before I can second guess this, I slosh right over him and slide into his lap.
Oh God.
Oh, he’s naked, alright. I gasp as my bare thighs brush his, my knees slipping around his waist. And there, pulsing and throbbing and hardening against my panties, is his… his cock.
Gabriel growls, and suddenly his big hands slide over me, gripping my waist tightly. He looks up into my eyes as he holds me possessively in his lap, his erection throbbing like a beating muscle between my thighs and making me… well, making me wet. Sinfully, heart-pulsingly wet.
“You sure you know what you’re doing?” he growls.
“No,” I gasp. “But I’m done being scared that I don’t.”
He groans. “C’mere, beautiful.”
His hand slides up my back and tangles in my long hair. And suddenly, he pulls me into him, and I moan as his lips crush to mine.
And if this is a sin, take me to Hell. Because once I’ve had a taste of Gabriel Marsden, I never want to go back to what I was before.
Chapter Ten
Delilah
I gasp as his hands slide over me, and I moan into his lips as his tongue seeks mine. There’s a fierceness to his kiss and a hunger in his grip, and I melt against his lap eagerly and willingly. I know this is wrong, and sinful, but I also can’t say no to it. I don’t want to say no this time, because I want this with every part of my soul—damned or not.
Gabriel’s hands tease back over my waist, and his fingers slip under the hem of my tank top. He grips it tightly, and I whimper as he begins to peel it up, over my skin. I tremble, gasping into his mouth as he pulls it higher and higher, until it’s bunched just under my breasts. I know I could stop him. I know I could end this now, and walk away, and it’s not like he’d force me, even with how much bigger than me he is, and how strong he is.
But I’m not going to do that. Tonight, I’m saying yes, and I’m not stopping any of this.
He tugs, and I gasp as the tank top slips up, teasing across my nipples as he pulls it higher. He tugs it free of my hair and tosses the soaked tank top away, and then his hands are on me again, his arms tight around me as he pulls me against him. I whimper, feeling my nipples drag over his rock-hard chest as his mouth devours mine.
My pulse races, and I moan as I feel something hard and throbbing pulse between my legs. I know what it is, and it both scares and thrills me. He’s so hard against me, and I can feel every inch of this thick, pulsing length beating against me, from my pussy through my panties all the way to my bare tummy. My heart beats like a drum, and slowly, haltingly, I drop my hand between us.
I tremble, pushing my hand lower and lower, until suddenly, my fingers brush something hot, and silky and hard as steel. I gasp haltingly, trembling as my fingertips brush over the swollen head at the tip of him.
“Oh my God,” I gasp quietly into his mouth. My hand slips lower, and slowly, my fingers slip around his girth. And oh my God is right.
Gabriel is huge.
He’s very, very big, and when my hand doesn’t even close around his size, my heart skips. Again, it’s somehow both scary and thrilling at the same time, like I’m excited and very, very nervous at the same time. My fingers flutter up and down his length, and I gasp at how hard he is under such soft, silky skin.
“You can grip it harder,” he growls into my lips.
Right, this is a lesson: a practice, if you will, for the real world. With my preacher. No big deal. Definitely not a Hell-fire worthy sin at all.
But even if I know this is wrong, I can’t, and I won’t, stop. I wrap my fingers around him tighter, and when he growls when I stroke again, a fiery feeling blazes through me. I slide my grip up and down him again, a
nd Gabriel hisses as he grabs me hard and bruises my lips with his kiss.
I keep stroking him as he devours my lips, his tongue dueling with mine. His big hands slide down over my butt, and I whimper when he squeezes me through them. His cock twitches and throbs in my hand against my tummy, and my core tightens and quivers in heat.
Suddenly, he pulls away from the kiss and takes my hand from him. I frown, and I’m worried that I’m so terrible that he’s calling this whole thing off, when he suddenly, stands, spins us, and then spins me around. I gasp as he pushes me forward, bending me over the edge of the baptism tank with my knees on the seat he was just in and my butt up in the air, out of the water.
“Gabriel—”
“Bend over,” he hisses darkly in my ear, which sends a thrill through my core I’ve never felt before. It’s sexy, but there’s this dark edge to it that has my breath catching and my pulse quickening.
“I want you to bend the fuck over for me, bad girl,” he growls into my ear, making me moan as my eyes roll back.
His fingers slip under the sides of my soaked panties, and I whimper as he starts to peel them down off of my hips. They slip away, and slide down over my butt, and my face goes crimson. I can feel the soaked cotton peeling away from between my legs, and it sends this electric feeling sizzling through me. He tugs them down my thighs, and my face burns hotly.
For the first time ever, I’m naked in front of a man. Naked, and shamefully bent over, letting him see everything. I know I should be mortified or disgusted with my own behavior. My God, I should be running away from here and him as fast as I can.
But I don’t feel or do anything of those things. Bent over the edge of the tub like this, feeling Gabriel’s heated gaze tease over me, I feel nothing but desire and pleasure.
He lowers himself behind me, and when I feel his hands grip my butt and spread me open, I blush furiously.
“Gabriel, what are you—”
“I’m doing this, beautiful.”
Suddenly, I feel it, and the axis of my entire world shifts. I see stars as the pleasure explodes through me. I see pure fire and white light when I feel something wet and hot, and so good slide over my bare pussy. I suddenly realize it’s his tongue, and I whimper and blush.