“Not at all,” I answered. I watched her drop down to the ground as she leaned against the hulled out remains of a tree behind her. She closed her eyes and tried to slow down and regulate her breathing, in and out. Bill sat down beside her and reached for her knee, giving it a hearty pat. She opened her eyes and glanced at him warily, but he just nodded with a quick smile. It was his way of letting her know that she would be fine.
Propping his arms behind his head, he leaned back against the tree stump, and stretched his stocky legs out in front of him, appearing as comfortable as a cat in front of a warm fire. I didn’t sit down, but stood beside Bill with my sword suddenly feeling much too heavy in my hands. I carefully scanned my surroundings again, especially the perimeter of the forest directly in front of us. I was looking for anything that might mean trouble. Bill, however, had his eyes closed and looked like he was ready to take another emotionap.
“How long have you been a Retriever?” I asked Delilah, thinking it was a good idea to focus on anything besides her run-in with Plutus.
Delilah sighed as she opened her eyes and looked at me. “Not long,” she said as she stretched her arms above her head before leaning forward, and crossing her arms over her legs. She glanced up at me again and added: “I think … maybe a week.”
I’d already noticed that she wasn’t carrying a weapon. “Where’s your sword?”
“That demon back in the prison broke it in half over his knee!” she said, her eyes going wide. “You called him Plutus, right?”
I nodded as I imagined Plutus breaking her sword in half. “Did you get your sword from the bladesmith in the Dark Wood?” I asked. I couldn’t imagine that one of Tallis’s finely crafted blades would break so easily.
Delilah shook her head. “I didn’t get it at all. Afterlife Enterprises shipped it to me a few days ago, right before I was sent on this mission.”
I could only imagine they’d gotten the sword elsewhere. Moreover, Plutus probably wouldn’t have tried to kill her if he saw Tallis’s mark on her sword. He most likely would have had the same strange reaction to her as he did with me.
But as to Delilah, she was as ill-prepared as I was when Jason first appointed me to my new position. “So, that was your first trip to the Underground City?” I asked and she just nodded. “Did Afterlife Enterprises prepare you for your mission at all?”
“Um, I don’t really know,” she answered as she leaned back against the tree again, pulling her legs into her chest. She continued to breathe more deeply. “I mean, they gave me a goody bag. That included the portal-cutting chalk, and another portal ripping device that allows me to enter the Dark Wood directly from my apartment in Spain. I also got a key to the Underground City’s front gate and a map of the Underground City and the Dark Wood. Other than those things, no, I received no further preparation at all.”
“Shit, you got more goodies than we did,” Bill exclaimed, opening one eye to study her. “We got a whole lot o’ jack.”
“Afterlife Enterprises didn’t send you Dante’s Inferno?” I asked. It puzzled me because it made no sense that I received certain items that she didn’t, and vice versa.
Delilah studied me for a moment, looking as perplexed as I. “What? The book that everyone has to read in high school English class?” she asked. When I nodded, she shook her head. “No, I never received any book.”
“They sent me the Inferno to use as a guide in the Underground,” I explained. “Apparently, Dante toured the Underground City in the fourteenth century and wrote all about it. Now, Afterlife Enterprises uses the book to help Retrievers navigate and find their way through the various levels of the Underground.”
“Oh,” Delilah answered with a nod, although she didn’t look especially interested. The color in her cheeks had returned, although her pupils were still wide and dilated. Apparently it wasn’t easy to lose the stamp of terror you receive after going through hell and back.
“Not that Dante really knew what the hell he was talkin’ about,” Bill piped up, shrugging. He didn’t bother opening his eyes when he added, “Half the time, the frickin’ thing’s wrong!”
Delilah smiled at him uneasily before eyeing me again.
“And where’s your guardian angel?” I asked. I tried to comprehend what the people who worked for Afterlife Enterprises were thinking when they sent this poor girl out with no angel and no preparations. How did they expect any of us to succeed as Soul Retrievers when they provided absolutely no support or training? If not for Tallis, I was more than sure my first mission to the Underground would have been my last. And now, if not for us, Delilah would, most likely, have met her demise.
She studied Bill before shrugging. “I don’t know. I don’t even know if I have one. I mean, if I do, I’ve never been introduced to him or her.”
That brought up another interesting fact in my mind—the only other two Retrievers I’d met thus far were Saxon and Sherita. We encountered Sherita during our first trek to the Underground City. The thing that struck me as most curious was the glaring absence of a guardian angel in attendance with Saxon or Sherita. I looked at Bill and frowned with confusion. “Why am I the only Retriever with an angel in tow?” I asked him.
He shrugged. “Got me, nips,” he replied before feigning a keen interest in the mustard stain on his Metallica T-shirt.
“Bill?” I demanded, more than aware that anytime Bill actually mentioned his own slovenliness, it was usually because he was trying to avoid something else. “Why do I detect that there’s much more to this story than you’re letting on?”
He was quiet for a few seconds before he broke out into a big smile. “Ah, what the hell? I’ll tell ya.” Then he cleared his throat and addressed both Delilah and me. “Just so you got the background, D-girl,” he said to Delilah, who appeared surprised at her new nickname, “I have a slightly tarnished reputation at Afterlife Enterprises,” he started and I sighed. I could only imagine how much this story was about to be blown out of proportion because exaggeration and Bill were the best of friends. “So here’s the deal, I’m real popular with the ladies and I’m kinda the life o’ the party an’ shit like that. So, naturally, lots of other, less awesome and more douchy angels aren’t down with how cool Angel Bill is, right?” Without waiting for either of us to respond, he added, “Right. It’s called jealousy.”
“Okay,” Delilah said with an expression of complete bewilderment.
“Right, so I’m like this accidental Jedi, you know?” Bill continued. By this point, he’d already lost both of us. “Like everything I do is super-Jedi; like even though I’m not aware I’m even doin’ it.” He stared at Delilah and his eyebrows reached for the sky. “That’s how cool I am.”
“Oh,” Delilah said while nodding to let him know she was paying close attention, or so I figured.
“So, I get inta some deep water ’cause I’m partying a little too hard, and overall, just bein’ a little too awesome for all the other angels ta handle,” Bill explained. Glancing up at me, he said, “Hence your little accident, nips.”
“Great,” I muttered, but I wasn’t really angry. Actually, I was intrigued as to where his story was going.
“Anyhoo,” Bill resumed the rambling narrative, “so, ya know, Jason Skeletorhorn has ta like make an example of me ’cause he don’t want any o’ the other angels suddenly growin’ some balls an’ actin’ as cool as Bill, namsay?”
“That means ‘know what I’m saying?’” I translated for Delilah.
“Oh,” she said before facing Bill again. “I know what you’re saying,” she added with a little smile.
Good,” he answered. “So, tryin’ ta make an example of Angel Bill, Skeletor decides to put me on cafeteria lunch duty.”
“What?” I demanded. I had no idea where his story came from, much less where it was going, and how it even got there.
“Right?!” Bill asked me while shaking his head. “Freakin’ Skeletor turned me into the goddamned Lunch Lady!” I shook my head like he
couldn’t be serious. “So, I’m like hatin’ this new job ’cause it’s so freakin’ lame, ya know?” Delilah nodded again. “So one day, they’re servin’ up this crap that looks like Godzilla ate the Swamp Creature an’ then took a big ol’ shit right into one o’ my servin’ dishes! An’ I’m like, dude, I can’t do this no more, ya know?”
Delilah nodded. “I know.”
“So I rebelled,” Bill finished, throwing his hands up into the air. He acted like we were supposed to guess the rest.
“What do you mean you ‘rebelled’?” I inquired.
“I wouldn’t let the man drag me down no more,” he continued. “They already tried ta ruin my reputation by turnin’ me into the lunch lady, an’ finally, I just had enough. No more Mr. Nice Angel.”
“So what did you do?” I asked patiently. My palm was beginning to ache from clutching my sword so tightly in my hand. Thinking it was probably all right to resheath it, since we hadn’t encountered anything too concerning, I removed the scabbard from around my chest. Then I slid my sword inside it and replaced it on my person before turning to face Bill. I was anxious to hear the rest of his odd story.
“I frickin’ set up about twenty plastic spoons along the edge of my counter before I loaded them with Godzilla shit. Then I unleashed the fury that was Angel Bill’s retaliation and shot as many freakin’ yokels as I could with that nasty, green dinosaur excrement.” He started laughing hysterically and slapping his thigh. “It was freakin’ awesome!”
“So you … what? Started a food fight?” I asked, frowning. I was slowly figuring out exactly how Bill arrived on my doorstep that fateful morning a few months back. After being kicked out of his position as a guardian angel for basically allowing me to die prematurely, Afterlife Enterprises demoted him to the cafeteria staff. It was just another job which he clearly couldn’t handle. So, with no other place for him to go, and at a loss over what else to do with him, they sent him to me.
Fabulous.
“No, it wasn’t a fight, nips. A fight implies that the other side retaliated. No sir, baby, this was complete annihilation, a blitz, a premeditated act of destruction aimed at all yokels and dumbasses by Angel Bill. Never was there such a full-scale food slaughter waged so deftly, and never shall there be again.” He nodded with satisfaction and fell silent for a few seconds. “Amen to that,” he finished … at last.
Delilah had a look of concern on her face, but she didn’t say anything as Bill eyed us again, his smug smile freshly renewed. “So after that, Skeletor asked me what more he should do with me. Dude! I was like, send me to nips!” Bill grinned up at me warmly. “And here I am. The rest is ancient history.”
“And on that cheerful note, are you both ready to start moving again?” I asked, mostly addressing Delilah to see if she was feeling okay.
She smiled at me and nodded before getting on her feet. “Do you know what we’re supposed to do with the souls in the vial?” she asked as I fished through my fanny pack until I located the map of the Dark Wood.
I nodded but wasn’t exactly sure where the Soul Mail drop was. Saxon kindly circled it for me on the map, however, so I replied, “According to the map, we should spot a river once we make it past this hill.” Glancing down at the map and then up at the horizon before us, I saw that the hill dropped off about forty feet from where we stood.
“Cool,” Delilah said and she and Bill began to lead the way. I brought up the rear, which was fine by me.
“So Delilah, huh?” Bill asked and she responded by looking at him with a curious expression on her face. “That’s a real interestin’ name,” he said before facing her and singing. “Hey there, Delilah, what’s it like in the Underground City?”
Delilah immediately started laughing at Bill with a wide grin. “I’m sure Plain White T’s would love hearing your unique rendition of their song,” she remarked before laughing again.
I shook my head, but couldn’t keep from smiling too. Sometimes, Bill was pretty funny; I had to admit. I continued to walk in silence, and watched the two of them as they laughed together. I had the strangest feeling of contentment. It just sort of blossomed inside me from nowhere. I was thankful for the brief moments of “alone time” whenever I could find it. It was the first opportunity for me to really contemplate our last mission to the Underground City.
Without boasting or tooting my own horn, I had to admit I was way beyond proud of myself. I not only explored the Underground, but also managed to defend us against demons, and all by myself. That was an incredible feeling. All of my hard training, combined with the physical and emotional tolls, were well worth it. I achieved the goals I set and became the woman I always strove to be. I was brave and strong.
All of a sudden I had an epiphany. I basically wasted my former life by constantly trying to fix what I believed was wrong with me; but in reality, nothing ever was. The old me never learned that morsel of wisdom. Instead, I tried to change everything about myself until I wasn’t even living my own life. If I worried that I needed to be more outgoing, I read a self-help book about it. If I thought I should be funnier, or more confident, or more easy-going, or more of this and less of that, I could always find a book on the subject. And I read them, all of them. I basically spent most of my adult life reading self-help books. But all they managed to do was keep me from experiencing my own life, and my own feelings, and living how I saw fit. That was probably the biggest lesson I could take from my experience in the Underground. When your life is right on the line, there really is no time but the present.
One thing I knew for sure was that I never could have accomplished what I did in such a short amount of time without the help and guidance of Tallis
Tallis.
Suddenly, I got a strange and intense desire to touch the blade of my sword. It was like a craving or a need that just welled up and exploded inside of me that came out of nowhere. I gripped the hilt of my sword in its scabbard and pulled it out slightly, until the metal blade shone in the moonlight. Then I brought my fingers to the blade. The results of my action nearly knocked me over as a flood of images instantly started flashing before my eyes. I had to stop walking when the images became more real than the forest surrounding me.
I saw a castle, and recognized it was Fergus Castle. The sky was stormy with grey clouds and the water that splashed around the castle moat was the same color as Tallis’s eyes. It was the same castle I saw the first time I touched my sword. That was when Tallis said the sword had identified me as its mistress. Fergus Castle had been in Tallis’s family for centuries.
The castle slowly faded away and I was overcome with the perception that Tallis needed me. I wasn’t sure why, much less how, but I felt sure my sword was trying to impart that information to me. Even though it was nothing but a hunch, and an intuitive feeling, it grew so powerful and resolute, I couldn’t ignore it.
“There it is!” Hearing Bill’s voice made the thoughts inside me vanish in an instant. He started running down the other side of the hill, toward the river, which lay on our right-hand side. It was really more like a creek than a river.
I took a deep breath when my sword ceased giving me any other strange images or feelings. I slid it back down into the scabbard as I tried to make sense of what happened. I knew it was some sort of sign, but what I was supposed to do next, or where I was supposed to go, eluded me.
“Lils, what do we do now?” Bill asked me.
Paying more attention to the immediate task in front of me, I glanced down at the map and noticed we were in the right place. I followed Delilah down to the creek bed. Pulling out the vial with the two souls in it, I reached for a permanent marker in my pack, and wrote on the outside of the vial:
Two Souls retrieved by Delilah Crespo and Lily Harper.
I wanted to make sure we both received our due credit for retrieving the souls. I handed the vial to Delilah, who seemed startled at first, but she accepted it all the same. “So do I just drop it into the water?” she asked and I nodded, rem
embering the instructions Saxon gave me over the phone. “Okay, here goes,” she said as she released the vial into the water and we watched it disappear downstream. Neither of us said anything. When she looked back at me, her eyes were watering as she smiled. “Thank you for helping me retrieve my first soul.”
I nodded and returned her smile. “Two souls down and eight more to go,” I announced.
Delilah’s grin was warm and happy. “One soul down and nine more to go.”
Just then, Bill reached into his pocket for his phone, which was vibrating with an incoming text message. He flipped the top of the phone open and started reading before glancing up at me with a frown. “Um, Lils, looks like Alaire is looking for you.”
“What?” I asked incredulously as I reached for his phone, which he gladly handed to me.
“I have no clue how the devil got my phone number,” he said as he scratched his head.
“It’s a company phone, Bill,” I answered, my stomach already abuzz with new anxiety. “Jason probably gave it to him.”
“True dat,” Bill replied as I read the text message.
My Dear Ms. Harper,
Having just been informed of the death of one of my employees in the prison realm, I learned from Plutus that you are responsible for this tragic event. If you do not wish to have this incident reported to Afterlife Enterprises, please agree to meet me at the gates of the Underground City next Tuesday evening, 8:00 pm, your time. We can discuss the particulars over dinner.
P.S. If you do not respond to this message by tomorrow at 10:00 pm, your time, or if you refuse to meet me, I will have no choice but to alert Afterlife Enterprises about the unfortunate incident. They will proceed with their own investigation into the matter. Let me also remind you that two infractions buy you a ticket on the nearest train to Shade.
It is a shame we missed one another during your time here. I do hope you enjoyed your stay.
Fondly,
Alaire
“Ugh,” I said as I shook my head and tried to control the anger now pounding through me.
The Underground City (The Lily Harper Series) Page 19