by Jodie Larson
Table of Contents
Title Page
Copyright
Dedication
Prologue
One
Two
Three
Four
Five
Six
Seven
Eight
Nine
Ten
Eleven
Twelve
Thirteen
Fourteen
Fifteen
Sixteen
Seventeen
Eighteen
Nineteen
Twenty
Twenty-One
Twenty-Two
Twenty-Three
Twenty-Four
Twenty-Five
Twenty-Six
Twenty-Seven
Twenty-Eight
Acknowledgements
About the Author
Notes of the Past
Copyright © 2017 by Jodie Larson
Cover Design by Murphy Rae at Indie Solutions by Murphy Rae
www.murphyrae.net
Interior Design by Champagne Formats
www.champagneformats.com
Editor: Ellie McLove
www.lovenbooks.com
Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of the above author of this book.
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, brands, media and incident are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.
The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of various products referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission. The publication/use of these trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owners.
Table of Contents
Title Page
Copyright
Dedication
Prologue
One
Two
Three
Four
Five
Six
Seven
Eight
Nine
Ten
Eleven
Twelve
Thirteen
Fourteen
Fifteen
Sixteen
Seventeen
Eighteen
Nineteen
Twenty
Twenty-One
Twenty-Two
Twenty-Three
Twenty-Four
Twenty-Five
Twenty-Six
Twenty-Seven
Twenty-Eight
Acknowledgements
About the Author
To Andrea
Without you, Myles wouldn’t be getting his redemption. Thank you for believing in my stories.
Your side piece thanks you as well.
Sunlight dances across the room as the warm spring breeze carries the scent of the blooming lilacs through the open window. Tatum’s musical laugh hits me as I tackle her to the bed, her blond hair fanning out around her. When I suggested we skip school to stay home all day, I didn’t actually think she’d go along with it. She was hesitant at first, but when I told her my parents were gone, the little devil inside her wanted to come out and play.
And here we are, locked away in our own private oasis where we can be free. In one month, we’ll be free to do this all the time. No more glaring eyes or disapproving faces from the losers at school and the teachers who keep breaking us apart. Why isn’t it appropriate to make out with your girlfriend in the hallway?
I’ve been in love with Tatum Mitchell for ten years. She has only known about it for two. Now, with senior year coming to an end, we’ll have more carefree days like this. And we won’t have to skip school to be together.
“Myles! Stop! You’re going to make me pee my pants.” I can’t help but continue my assault. Her laughter is addictive. I can never get enough of it.
“No. You’re at my mercy. I’m kidnapping you to be my love slave and obey my every command.”
It’s not entirely a joke. There have been many nights where I’ve dreamed of us going away, leaving everything behind. We’d live off the money from the gigs and random bars we’d play in. Then, one day, we’ll strike it big, get the giant house and recording contracts and live happily ever after.
“Love slave?” She sits up after I relent and pull back. “You need to think of something else because that’s not happening.”
I tap my chin. “Sex slave?”
Tatum narrows her eyes. “Try harder.”
“Mine forever?”
Her glorious smile melts my heart. This woman is my everything. There’s no one on this earth that will ever compare to her. I can’t believe I’ve found the one.
“Definitely yours.” Tatum twirls a finger along my chest, snuggling close to my side. “Since we’re discussing forever, maybe we should actually talk about it.”
Turning my head, I kiss the tip of her nose. “Okay, what should we talk about?”
“Kids. How many?”
“It’s a little early to start thinking of that, isn’t it?” Hell, we’re only eighteen. I’d like to think kids will be way down the road. We need some alone time first.
“Humor me.” Tatum bats her eyelashes, knowing she’s got me where she wants me.
“Well, how many little me’s could you tolerate running after?” I ask, brushing some hair from her face.
She laughs. “If they’re exactly like you? Maybe one. But if they’re like me, probably three.”
“And if they’re a good combination of us both?”
“Then four,” she says with a laugh.
Out of nowhere, images of Tatum pregnant with our child pop into my head. Kids have never been on my radar, but the thought of rubbing her swollen belly and feeling our baby kick brings a smile to my face. It’s the ultimate way to mark her as mine.
Not to mention her boobs are going to be huge for a few years. Added bonus for me.
“Okay, what else?” She runs her hand down my shirt, tracing my abs. I flex them a little, just so she has more to maneuver around.
“Wedding. Big or small?”
“Small. I don’t want a huge fuss. Just our family and friends.”
I nod. “Agreed. But you better wear white.”
“Seeing as I’m dating you, I’m sure everyone knows I’m not pure,” Tatum says with a smirk.
That fucking smirk. I’d love to kiss it right off her face. Not yet.
“And career? What if one of us makes it big?”
Her lips connect with mine, teasing and tasting, coaxing me to open for her. A change of events, but one I’m willing to comply. Her sweetness runs over my tongue as I take the kiss further, locking her in my arms.
She pulls away, breathless and panting. “I’ll follow you wherever you go.”
“And what if I’m a plumber?” Not likely. Doing anything that doesn’t involve the guitar isn’t an option. I’ll play lowly gigs at the bars my whole life before that’ll happen.
“Then I’ll be the best plumber’s wife out there.”
I slip my hand under her waistband, playing with the top of her panties. “And if you become the world’s greatest guitarist, I’ll gladly be your back-up.”
Finding my way past her barrier, I find the smooth, wet skin I’m looking for. Her eyes light up with excitement as I play with her body.
“Kiss me.” It’s a request she doesn’t have to ask twic
e for.
Rolling her over, I lose myself into the woman I love, who’s going to give me everything I’ve ever hoped and dreamed for.
The room spins as I sit up in bed, my heart frantically trying to stay in my chest. Looking around, everything’s different. This isn’t my room or my bed. My guitars aren’t in the corner, nor are my music sheets scattered across the desk.
And the woman sleeping next to me is a stranger, another nameless face to occupy my nights.
Why does this dream keep happening? It was the past, long gone and buried. Or so I thought.
Plans change, shit happens. People leave.
Who needs plans? I’m living in the right now, worrying about no one but me.
And that’s how I want it.
“Can I call you tomorrow?”
Fuck, why is she still talking? Can’t she see we’re done here? I pull my boxers up and turn to acknowledge her question.
“I don’t think so. We’re hitting the road in the morning, so it’s not really worth it, you know? Gotta keep the road schedule and all.”
She purses her lips in disgust. “Your schedule says you’re on a long weekend.”
Of course she knows my schedule. Damn groupies.
“Family stuff. You understand, right?”
Judging by her pissed off face, I’m guessing not. She doesn’t argue as she slides her dress back over her shoulders, letting it flow over her plastic curves. Yeah, real or not, they still do the job. Walking over to the table, she grabs her purse and keys and turns to face me.
“You’re a dick, you know that?”
Tell me something new.
“I didn’t hear you complain last night about my dick.”
Red creeps up her neck. Maybe I went a bit too far with that last one.
“Do me a favor, don’t find me again.”
She slams the hotel door behind her and I smile. No problem, sweetheart.
Relationships aren’t my thing. Haven’t been for a while and I plan on keeping it that way. Why on earth would I want to tie myself down to one chick when I have dozens of girls throwing themselves at me after every concert? Shit, sometimes I’ll take home two at a time. They all leave the same way: pissed off. Not that I care. As long as they go, that’s all that matters. I don’t do the morning after or midnight cuddles or anything else. When they stop coming around, I’ll worry about it then.
I glance at the clock. Sound check is still a few hours away. Maybe Brecken needs some help getting the music together. Or Paxton could use a hand on stage, getting all the wires together. I’m not even going to bother with Kade because he’ll be attached to his phone talking with his wife. Or face timing his wife. Or phone fucking his wife. God, ever since he got married, it’s all he does. And I thought it was bad when they were only dating. At least he paid attention to something other than her. Barely, but he did.
With a yawn, I sit on the bed and toss the pillow she slept on to the floor. Don’t want to smell that flowery crap all morning. It was bad enough last night. Did she bathe in it? I’m surprised it wasn’t coming straight out of her pores.
I could use some sleep, though. I didn’t get much last night and I need to be at my best for tonight. It’s our last show here, a surprise encore after our first two concerts sold out within two hours after sales went live. Don, our manager, worked something out with the arena and posted this last-minute concert. It sold out shortly after. Being number one on the Billboard charts five weeks in a row will do that. Lightning Strikes are the hottest band in the country right now. Our demand is so high that we’ve had to turn down venues left and right, or put them on a wait list for next year. We’ve already been on the road for three months and we’ve got another three to go before we get our first real break. And I could use a break.
Scratching my stomach, I lie down and stare at the ceiling. I’ve had a strange feeling all morning, like something big was going to happen today. Obviously what’s-her-name wasn’t it. And thank God for that. Her mouth never stopped moving, and not in the good way. I’ve never been with a girl who wouldn’t shut up unless her mouth was full of something else. Well, that’s not true. There was that one chick back in Atlanta who tried talking through a blowjob. Even I was impressed she still got me to finish with all that talking. What can I say, the girl had a talented tongue.
I run a hand over the stubble on my cheek. The damn nagging in my gut is still there, like a bad omen or something. Not that I’m superstitious or anything, but I can’t shake whatever this is pressing on me. After dealing with the shit from my past, I shouldn’t be worried about a feeling. As of right now, I’m flying high, getting laid, and life can’t get any better. Fuck living with my head down, afraid of old ghosts. Never again.
No sense in dwelling on it. Lifting myself up, I gather my clothes off the floor and put them on, ready to find the coffee shop in the lobby. Too bad the bar isn’t open yet. A Bloody Mary would hit the spot. At least get the fog from last night away. Maybe that final shot wasn’t such a good idea. Then again, that’s when the blond sank her nails into me. Not that my dick minded. In fact, he enjoyed it all night.
I pay for my insanely-priced black coffee and find a seat at a table near the window. It’s quiet in this corner, and I need that. Soon it’ll be screaming fans and music turned up so loud I fear my eardrums will rupture. Even with the noise-cancelling earpieces.
What happened to the old days of playing in Kade’s garage for fun? Sure, we had stars in our eyes as we played our Foo Fighter albums, thinking one day we’ll be partying next to Dave Grohl. Reality is so much different. We were a little naïve in thinking we’d just hit it big, sing on stage, and go home at night. No one ever said anything about four-hour long rehearsals, meeting with the press, doing voice overs for local radio stations, and blah blah blah blah blah. When did music become so…unmusical?
The chair across from me screeches as Brecken lowers himself into the empty seat.
“Didn’t expect to see you here this early.”
I take a sip and shrug. “Yeah, well, early mornings will do that to you.”
The dick smirks. “Or late nights. How was the blond?”
“Fine.”
“Just fine? Hell, the way she was eye-fucking you backstage I was half expecting your dick to be broken this morning.”
She did lay it on pretty thick last night, but that’s about all she did. Again, too much talking, not enough action.
I grab my junk and smirk. “Nope, still functions. May need to test it out tonight just to make sure.”
Brecken rolls his eyes. “You’re going to end up with some disease at this rate. Maybe pack it away for a night? Or seven?” He takes a sip of his coffee. “It’s our last night here before we’ve got a few days off. How about you do something that doesn’t involve you sticking your cock into places unknown?”
Fuck, he makes me sound like a whore. So I’ve banged a few girls since we started the tour. It’s not like it’s been every night. Just…okay. Maybe I have been knee deep in pussy lately. They’re seeing just as much of me as they always have. Nothing’s changed.
“Aww, are you lonely, Breck? Do you need some cuddle time?”
He flips me the bird. “Like I want that. No thanks.” He stands from the chair and raps his knuckles on the table twice. “We have a meeting up in Kade’s room in about twenty minutes. Don’t forget.”
I narrow my eyes. “Where else would I go? Not like I have anything else to do.”
He pats my shoulder before leaving me to my silent brooding again. Why do his comments sting just a little? Sure, I love pussy, but it’s not like I’m incapable of doing anything else. And so what if I’m screwing a bunch of girls on the road. Isn’t that what the lifestyle is all about? Sex and rock and roll? We all can’t have smoking hot wives like Kade. God, I remember when I first saw Adrienne at the concert that night. She was the only girl in the whole bar wearing a hoodie. I mean, who goes to a concert dressed like that? I had every intention
of finding out why, but Kade beat me to her. It was probably better that way. She and I don’t exactly get along. At least it’s been better than it was in the beginning. She’s relaxing a bit more and even started joking with me. A year and a half around me will do that.
Truth be told, I’m not into brunettes. She was just going to be another notch on my bedpost. And knowing her now, she deserved so much more than that. Kade’s a good guy and the best husband to her. He was never wild and crazy, but watching him with Adrienne makes me wonder if I can be like that. I thought so once, but that was a long time ago.
Life happens. People leave. And shit storms brew.
The less complicated, the better, I say. Even though he’s happier, I can’t see how sticking it to one girl night after night would be enjoyable. Maybe the first couple years, but after a while, the feeling has to die down. Get stale and stagnant. It’s like eating the same cheeseburger every day for dinner and never having a steak again.
Fuck, now I’m hungry. I wonder if there’s a burger joint that’s open within walking distance. I pull out my phone and do a quick search. There’s a fast food chain only a couple blocks away. They may not have cheeseburgers, but anything greasy with bacon sounds good right about now.
Full and ready for a nap, I knock on Kade’s door. Paxton greets me with a frown. “You’re late.”
I slurp my soda through the straw and wiggle the cup in front of his face. “Had to get something to eat. Can’t run the tank on empty.”
He rolls his eyes and walks into the main sitting area with me. Adrienne’s sitting on the loveseat with Kade, her feet tucked underneath her. Huh, didn’t know she was coming today. She’s positively glowing as she looks at Kade. Almost makes me wish someone would look at me that way again. Brecken has the chair to their right, laughing at something she’s said. Paxton takes the other seat, which leaves me standing. Again. Fuckers.
I sit on the corner of the table and cross my feet at the ankles. “What’d I miss?”
Kade breaks into a smile. “Nothing. We waited for you before we made the announcement.”
“What announcement?”