by Jodie Larson
“What happened?” I barely recognize my voice. If I thought I was on information overload before, I was wrong.
Tatum straightens up and wipes her cheeks. “Started out as a heart attack. He never told anyone about his blockages or the angioplasty he had right after I left. About three months after I got home, he had another heart attack, this time causing him to go into the hospital. They said it had damaged forty percent of his heart. He was tired and ignored the doctor’s orders. Instead, we went home and I did everything for him. Refused to let him lift anything or go up and down the stairs, so we turned the den into a bedroom. I cooked healthy dinners, got a job to help support us, even though he now qualified for disability through his job. Soon, he just stopped moving around. Stayed in his favorite chair all day long.” I cup her cheek with my palm. The look of pain on her face damn near kills me. “Within two months of us leaving the hospital, he had a massive stroke and died in his sleep.”
This poor girl has faced so much. Basically alone. What would I have done if the situation was reversed? Would I have asked for help or would I have said this is my mess to deal with? I know exactly what I would do. The same thing she did. I’d push everyone away, determined to take on my problems and deal with them as best I can. Everything makes sense. Why she left and stayed away. She was processing and dealing with her shit the best way she knew how.
My strong girl.
“I’m so, so sorry, Tay.” I kiss her temple.
There’s nothing more we need to say, so I pull her under the covers and hold her close. Kissing her shoulder, she wraps her arms around mine and melts into my embrace before quietly falling asleep.
Warm. Too warm. Did I get wrapped up in my blankets again? My arms are free, but that’s about all. Feeling around, I discover what’s got me tangled up. Or better yet, what’s tangled around me. Myles has me in a vise lock; one arm wrapped around my collarbone and the other around my waist. This feels like home, like how I used to wake up every morning. I close my eyes and welcome sleep to come back. I don’t want to break this bubble. Not yet.
Last night, even though it was tough to do, I spilled every secret I’d been holding from him. He finally knows why I left and why I stayed away. It shocked me when he pulled me into his arms rather than run away, like I was expecting.
If this is a dream, please don’t wake me.
Myles stirs behind me, pulling me closer. “Morning.” His gravelly voice is music to my ears. With a kiss to his forearm, I turn to face him.
“Morning. Sleep well?”
A glorious smile breaks across his face. “Best night’s sleep I’ve had in ages.”
“Me too.” I match his smile and run my fingers through his messy hair. “How do you feel?”
Just then both our stomachs rumble. We laugh. “Apparently I’m hungry.” His eyes change from warm to predatory, sparking to life. “But breakfast can wait.”
In the blink of an eye, Myles rolls me over, laughing while nibbling at my neck. I can’t help the squeal of delight as he hovers over me, devouring every inch of my exposed flesh. Every morning should start like this, being wrapped up in the arms of the one you love, even if he doesn’t know it.
How could I possibly not love him still? Yes, I’ve made mistakes, but so has he. He didn’t exactly come looking for me. Never once did he stop over and ask my dad where I was, or tried calling my mom to see if she’d heard from me. He just let me go. And sure, that hurt, but it was a pain I had welcomed since I was the one who ran when things got scary.
Myles lifts his head up, brushing away the strands of hair from my face. “Hey, you okay?” Concern plays in his eyes as he settles in above me. “Why do I get the impression you’re not fully here?”
I smile and run a finger over his lips. “Wherever you are, I’m there with you. Isn’t that what we always used to say?”
“Bonnie and Clyde.”
“Beauty and the Beast.”
“Hey,” he says with a smile. “No one gets to call you a beast.”
Jerk. I smack his shoulder with a laugh. “Ass.”
He reaches around and squeezes mine. “Yep, it’s there.”
A fit of giggles ensues as he roams my body with his hands and mouth. Giggles turn to sighs, which then turn to moans as he expertly plays my body like his guitar, knowing where to make me sing. I may have a limited history, but my opinion has always been that Myles is great at everything he does.
“Tay, look at me.” Myles ducks down to my level as I wipe the tears from my eyes.
“I give up. Just forget the whole stupid idea. Why on earth did I think I could do this?”
He moves next to me, cradling me in his arms while kissing the top of my head. “Don’t give up. This is something new and you’re a beginner. There’s bound to be some missed steps along the way.”
I sniff. “That’s easy for you to say. You taught yourself how to play the guitar when you were six. And I bet you were perfect right from the start.”
Grabbing both sides of my face, he forces me to look at him. “Are you kidding? I may have learned to play at six and it was shitty at best. But I kept on with it, practiced every day until I could play the songs without missing a chord.” Myles places a gentle kiss on my lips. “And you will too. Don’t get frustrated or give up. It takes time. Besides, I know something you and I are very good at.” He wiggles his brows suggestively.
Against my anger, I laugh anyway. “You always think of sex.”
He kisses me quickly before removing my cardigan. “I’m a seventeen-year-old guy. Be happy I think about things other than sex. Otherwise you’d never leave this room. Ever.”
Before the memory completely fades, I wrap my legs around Myles’ waist and twist, placing me on top. His surprised grunt is all I hear before I kiss him with every ounce of passion I can find. Our tongues twist together in the dance they know all too well. He swallows my gasps as his fingers find their way to my waiting pussy.
“Fuck, you’re so wet.” He reaches around blindly, trying to find the edge of the bed. I know what he’s looking for and my heart sinks a little. Another barrier between us, as if there weren’t enough as it is. It’s not right. Logically, I know it is. Obviously he has a past – or present as I’ve seen on countless occasions. And it’s the right thing to do. Someday, someone is going to have to explain why the right thing can feel wrong.
My body is wound so tight that I don’t care anymore. Need and lust take over as I climb off and scramble to the edge of the bed, hanging halfway off to pull a condom from his pocket. Within seconds, Myles has the thin scrap of material over his cock, but doesn’t let me get up.
He smacks my ass, letting the sting spark the need to life. “I’m thinking this position will do just fine.” Both of his hands grasp my hips as he slides into me, a sweet torture. Over the years, the sight of him disappearing inside me, watching as we join together, is as powerful as any drug sold on the streets. Now, unable to see, I have to rely on the feeling alone. And oh, do I ever. Over and over as he thrusts in and out in short and long strokes. My hands steady my body against the floor because I’m pretty sure he’s trying to fuck me right off the bed.
Each moan only drives him further, keeping his teasing rhythm to bring me closer to the edge, only to leave me dangling off of it. Damn him for knowing me all too well. We’re no longer beginners at this game. We had years of practice to know each other’s wants and needs. And even with our separation, nothing has changed.
I meet him thrust for thrust, using the floor as leverage. Myles leans down and runs his tongue along my spine. Another jolt of excitement runs through me. I need him to let me go, let me show him how he affects me.
“Please, I’m so close.” If hotel security isn’t called after this, I’d be shocked. We’re not exactly being quiet. In fact, if anyone was listening out in the hall, I’m sure they’d think someone was being bludgeoned to death. Which isn’t far from the truth, with his massive cock pounding in and out of me.
Ju
st when I’m about to scream again, he withdraws and pulls me up, letting me sit on his lap.
“Damn you!”
I don’t stay mad for long as he impales me again, this time holding me so close there’s barely a breath between us. Wrapping my legs around his waist, I ride him with every ounce of my being. We collide in a powerful kiss, one filled with passion and lust, need and desperation.
“I needed to see your face when you come.” His short breaths beat against my lips. Sweat slicks our skin as we slide against each other. It doesn’t matter what goes on around us, in here, we’re the only two people in existence. We always have been.
Myles increases his speed and I come undone, gloriously crying out his name in reverence. His motions become jerky and fast, then still as he pulses inside me, indicating his release. We hold each other as our heart rates slow down to normal; our foreheads pressed together. I find his lips and kiss him again, this time tenderly and with no rush. With a last lingering kiss, we pull away from each other, but Myles doesn’t let me move too far.
“Not yet. I have something to say,” he says. A small dose of fear makes my stomach drop until he smiles and cups my cheek. “It’s not bad, at least I don’t think it is. Just hear me out.” He pauses and folds his hands over my ass, anchoring me to his body.
“You’re not exactly easing my tension.”
He laughs. “I know. Your whole body is as rigid as steel. Relax.” Blowing out a breath, I close my eyes and reset my mind. Don’t think. Just feel.
“Okay, I’m ready.”
“I’m still mad at you.” Not exactly what I was expecting. “That being said, I can’t deny that I’m still attracted to you too. We have a bond that keeps us together. I can’t ignore it. Neither can you. So I have a proposition for you.”
“Why does this sound like something out of a Michael Douglas movie?”
The sexy smirk I love lifts his mouth to the side. “I believe you’re thinking of Woody Harrelson.”
“Wasn’t Michael in that movie too?”
“Nope, Robert Redford.” He widens his eyes. “Unless you’re thinking of Fatal Attraction or A Perfect Murder, to which you’re really off base.”
The tension leaves my body and I relax again. “Oh, yeah, no. I’m with you now. So you’re saying you want to give me a million dollars for last night?”
Myles throws this head back with laughter. “What’s the saying? Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?” he says. I narrow my eyes. “Now shut up and let me talk.” He clears his throat. “Like I said, I’m still mad at you. That’s not going away overnight.”
He doesn’t want me. I was fooling myself into believing that we could go back to the way things were. Obviously he regrets last night and this morning was nothing but a sympathy fuck. Something to scratch the itch to get it out of your system.
When I try to stand, he tightens his grip on me. “Stop trying to move. I’m not done yet.”
“I get it. Really.”
I stop fighting when he grabs my face, forcing me to look at him. “Shut. Up. Now.” The seriousness of his voice stills my movements. “Like I said, I’m still mad at you. I have every right to be. However, we can’t deny our attraction to each other. So, I’m proposing a truce.”
“A truce?”
“Well, a little different than a truce. A chance.”
My heart kicks up a notch. “Really?”
Myles pulls me closer and kisses me again. “Really. Let’s go slow and see what happens.”
Wrapping my arms around his neck, I lay my head on his shoulder. “No more flirting with other people.”
“For both of us.”
I smile against his neck. “Fine. And no more being assholes to each other.”
“Done.”
“And we need to stay in the same rooms when we travel.”
Myles squeezes my ass again. “Definitely.”
Should I push this? “Maybe even a date here and there?”
“God you’re frustrating.” I can feel his smile against my lips as he kisses me again. “I can agree to those terms.”
Climbing off him, I stretch my arms and legs out while he disposes of the condom. I’m sore in places I didn’t know existed. When Myles comes back, he finds me sitting on the bed wearing his shirt again.
“I love how you look wearing my stuff.”
Bringing the collar to my nose, I smile. “It smells like you.”
With slow, methodical steps, he stalks over to me. Looking up, I’m greeted to his smiling face. He bends down and sniffs my neck. “Now it smells like you.”
I can’t help but ogle him as he slides his boxers on, covering my view of his glorious ass. This man is walking sin. He’s so much more grown up than I remember. Not that we were kids, but there’s a difference from your early-twenties to your late-twenties. He’s more defined, grown up. All the boyishness of his body has left, leaving nothing but pure man.
Knock. Knock. Knock.
“Tay? You in there?”
Myles looks between me and the door. “What’s he doing here?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. Maybe he wants to make sure I’m okay after the way I left the bar last night.”
Myles slides on his jeans, leaving the top button open. They hang low on his hips and for a brief second, I forget why we put them on. The pounding at the door reminds me.
“Tay, don’t make me come in there.”
Standing from the bed, I place a hand on Myles’ chest before kissing the corner of his mouth. “It’s just Brecken. He’ll see I’m fine and alive and will go away. Then you and I can…”
A smile relaxes his face, letting the tension lines melt away. He looks me up and down and the lines return. “You’re not answering the door like that.” The pounding intensifies, turning urgent. Myles grabs my arm as I walk to the door. “I said not like that.”
I wrestle my arm free of his grasp. “Again, it’s Brecken. He’s like my brother. Don’t worry.”
Before Myles has the chance to grab me, I quickly walk to the door and open it a crack. Brecken braces himself on the doorjambs, hovering over me as I open the door further.
He looks me up and down and frowns. “Um, bad time?” Something clicks as the cogs turn in his mind.
“Kinda. Whatcha need?”
Breck pushes past me, inviting himself into my room. I close the door and quickly follow behind him, just in time to witness Brecken punch Myles in the eye. Myles takes a swing and they start fighting on the floor.
“What the fuck? Stop it!” I try to separate them, but get thrown to the side. Myles tackles Brecken into the bed and lands another punch to his jaw.
“What’s your problem?” Myles screams above him.
“You fucking took advantage of her? Have you really sunk that low?” Brecken shoves Myles off and they stand apart, both heaving and rolling with anger. With this new distance, I stand between them, placing my palms on both their chests.
“Both of you calm the fuck down.” I turn to Brecken and a drop of blood rolls down his chin. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”
Red colors his face as he glares at Myles. “This cocksucker took advantage of you, knowing you were drunk and an easy prey.”
“No one took advantage of me.” I try to get Brecken to look at me but he remains focused on Myles. “I knew what I was doing last night.”
That finally gets his attention. “How could you know? I saw you when you left. You were plastered.”
They both back down and I breathe a sigh of relief. “I sobered up pretty quick. You don’t need to defend me.”
Brecken sighs and runs a hand through his hair. “Are you sure?”
Myles finally speaks. “She’s sure.”
I back up and wrap my arms around Myles’ waist. “Thanks for being my big brother, but I know what I’m doing.”
With a nod, Brecken sticks his hand out and Myles takes it. “Sorry about the eye.”
Myles laughs. “Yeah,
you may want to take care of that lip.”
Boys. Honestly. How can they go from beating the shit out of each other to laughing?
“You both need help.” We laugh and stand in silence for an awkward moment.
Brecken shoves his hands into his pockets and rocks back on his heels. “Well, just to let you know, Kade wants us packed up and on the bus in an hour, so you better get cracking.”
I mock salute him. “We’ll be there.”
The three of us walk to the door and Brecken stops in the hall before Myles has the chance to shut the door. “It’s nice to see the smile back on your face, Tay. Try not to lose it again.”
I show him the smile he wants and nod. “We’ll see how it goes.”
When Myles shuts the door, he corners me against it, caging me in with his arms. “I should go pack up my room.”
I look him up and down. “Dressed like that?”
He quirks an eyebrow. “You answered the door like that.”
“Yeah, but that’s because it was Brecken. You, on the other hand, will be walking out in public, letting every girl ogle you. I don’t think I’m comfortable with that.”
“Make you jealous?” He runs his nose up my neck, sending a shiver through my body.
“Yes,” I respond on a breathy whisper.
“Good.” He starts unbuttoning my shirt. “Then I’ll need this back so you don’t lose your mind when I walk the halls.” He slides the shirt from my body, leaving me naked and exposed. I should be cold, but the heat coming from his stare warms me to my core. Every time he looks at me like this, it’s as if nothing else matters. The world has stopped and won’t start spinning again until we’re righted.
My upper brain function returns as he puts his shirt on, leaving only the top two buttons undone. Just enough of his skin peeking out to give you an idea of what lies beneath. Not that it would ever be in question. Only he could wear the baggiest of clothes and still look hot. I know, I’ve seen it.
With a final kiss, he cups my cheek and rests his forehead on mine. “To be continued when we’re on the bus.”
I can’t speak, only nod as he opens the door and leaves me in a stupor. Is this real? Did I finally get back everything I’ve wanted?