by Linda Broday
“That is true. I can’t. But you will stay here,” he said evenly. “Take a seat.”
Though reluctant, the boys sat cross-legged on the ground.
Tait dropped down beside them. He apologized for jumping to the wrong conclusion before hearing them out. “I’ve made a whole lot of mistakes in my life and I don’t want you to make them too. Your mother and I never had a patient father who took the time to really listen to us. I vowed to never be like him, but now I’ve done the same thing to you. The only difference is that I won’t whip you. I never will.”
He paused, searching for the right words. “We pay for our mistakes, and I’ve paid a tremendous price. I’ll probably pay a lot more when the law catches me. Now, I’d like to hear what you plan to do with the animals you catch in your traps.”
Jesse kept his eyes on his boot. “Well, Sawyer, us, and the Truman boys want to start our own circus.”
“We’ll train the animals to do tricks and put on a show for the town,” Joe said. “We’ll make people laugh. Sawyer says he heard about this man that puts on a circus. If P. T. Barnum can do it, we can too. Sawyer is real smart.”
The crazy scheme made it hard for Tait to keep a straight face, but he had to look like he was taking them seriously, no matter what. He could see how important this was to his nephews, and it might keep them out of trouble. “You know, that’s not a bad idea. What if I help you?”
“Sure. I guess.” Jesse glanced at Joe. “But we sorta want to do it ourselves.”
The answer surprised Tait a little and made him very proud. The boys needed to learn how to be independent, figure out things that would help them when no one was around.
“I understand. But if you change your mind, just let me know.”
“Uncle Tait?”
He looked for the freckle by the boy’s left ear that Melanie had mentioned but didn’t find one. “Yes, Joe?”
“When are you gonna start looking for the killers of our mama and daddy? We want to know when you’ll get even.”
Guilt rushed through Tait that he hadn’t done more to help them come to terms with the deaths of their parents. That he’d been busy wasn’t much of an excuse. “I’m sorry this isn’t happening fast enough. We’ve had the wedding to deal with and all, but I plan to ride out soon to see what I can find.”
Claire’s death weighed heavily on Tait. His sister deserved justice.
At least now Melanie could watch after the kids, but his pledge not to dump them on her and leave swept into mind—his pledge and her angry shoe-throwing. Maybe taking Jack with him would assure her he was coming back.
“I want you both to be on your best behavior for your Aunt Melanie when I do. Can I have your word?”
“We promise,” both said simultaneously.
“I’m sorry, Uncle Tait,” Jesse said in a low voice. “I shouldn’t have said those things.”
Joe lifted his eyes. “Me too. We’ll try to do better.”
“It’s already forgotten.” Tait got to his feet, brushed off his clothes, and then pulled the boys up. “I’m sure you’re chomping at the bit to start making those traps, and I need to speak to Sheriff Bowdre. I’ll see you later.”
They parted ways, and Tait sought his old friend. “I’m riding out to see Hondo tomorrow. How do things look for you?”
Jack rubbed his jaw. “I think I can leave tomorrow. It’ll take us three or four days to get there and back. What does your new wife say about you riding out so soon?”
“Haven’t told her yet. Maybe she won’t raise too big a fuss since you’re coming along.” Tait paused. “Jack, I can’t stop thinking that someone might’ve killed Claire and John to get back at me.”
“I haven’t wanted to say anything, but the thought’s crossed my mind too. It’s too early to know for sure.”
“It wouldn’t be the first time. Lucy paid the ultimate price. Taking her life and making me live with the grief every single day was far worse than killing me.”
“In that case, it’s got to be Kern Berringer at the bottom of Claire’s murder. He hates your guts, especially now that you killed his boys.” Jack laid a hand on Tait’s back. “If Hondo knows anything, we’ll drag it out of him.”
“I’ll wring his fool neck. Hondo has this thing about protecting me.”
“Yeah.” They walked along for a few moments, then Jack asked, “Have you thought about seeking a pardon?”
“Yep. Now that I have a family, I have to find a way to clear my name—for their sakes.”
“I’ll help all I can. The governor gave Clay amnesty, and I traded information for my freedom. Luke Legend repaid all the money he stole.” Jack pushed back his hat, allowing his light-brown hair to show. “Surely in all this time you’ve found some kind of information you can use in exchange for lifting the price on your head.”
“Yeah, I’ve seen plenty. I’ll think about this.”
“Watch for an opportunity. I need to go help Nora. We’ll talk later.”
Tait watched his friend walk away, his thoughts turning. He still had a good bit of money stuck away from the train holdups. He could offer to give it back. And that led his thoughts in a different direction. Melanie’s questions about that money had seemed oddly specific. Security? Maybe a wife needed to have a certain confidence about her new life. Especially one who was used to relying on a lucky cut of the cards.
She drank, she gambled, she had experience in lovemaking—a perfect wife for him.
But…
Tait released a long sigh and braced himself. He might as well go tell her he was leaving.
Eight
Melanie was unpacking when Tait returned from his talk with Joe and Jesse. She glanced at Becky, asleep on the bed, and went to greet him.
Looking every inch the dangerous outlaw with a stubbled jaw and brooding features, Tait somberly removed his hat and laid it on a table. Her thoughts went back to the air they’d cleared earlier that morning and his suspicions about her secrets. Thank goodness she’d covered up the truth. Confessing that small lie had kept her big secret safe, but she’d have to be more careful.
“How did it go with the twins?” she asked.
“Good.” He crossed the space between them but didn’t touch her. “You’ll never guess why they want to trap critters. They’re branching into the circus business. They’re going to teach the animals to do tricks and put on a show for the town. Pretty smart thinking, but I didn’t tell them how hard it’ll be.”
Melanie laughed. “Those boys are something. But you know it’ll keep them occupied.”
“That’s why I’m all for it.”
“Will we have to make room for cages here in our suite?”
“Nope. I’ll make sure.” He glanced toward the bedroom. “How’s Becky?”
“Taking a nap. I thought I’d seize advantage of the quiet to unpack again.” She wanted to lay her palm against his cheek, but she resisted. He seemed preoccupied, in a quandary about something. “Is anything wrong, Tait?”
“You might think so. I promised Joe and Jesse that I’d go see what I could find out about the men who murdered their parents. I know I promised not to dump the kids on you and ride out, but this can’t be helped. Before you say anything…Jack’s going with me, so it won’t be more than three, maybe four days at the most. We’ll leave at daybreak.”
The ends of Tait’s sun-streaked hair nestled against his collar, and his gray eyes studied her. Slender strands of gold emerged from the dark pupils, cutting through the silver lightning of his eyes like the spokes of a wagon wheel. Such beautiful, expressive eyes that took in the room—and her. She wanted to look away, to hide from the things he saw, but found herself locked in place.
Melanie wet her lips, steadied her nerves, and smiled. Actually, this would work out nicely. She could search his soddy and send a letter to the judge re
porting in without worrying that Tait would see her. “Some things you can’t help. This is important, Tait. But I don’t know how to care for kids. What if I mess up and hurt them?”
Real fear set in that she’d be alone with them.
Tait laughed. “They’re not a lamp. They’re pretty tough. You feed them, make sure they wash and sleep, and that’s about it. The boys will keep occupied with the other kids, and Becky will be fine as long as you take her to the pot.”
Melanie bit her lip. “I don’t know. Other people find children easy, but they just scare me.”
“You have the women in town to fall back on anytime you have a problem. They’ll be glad to help. I’d stay if I could but I have to go do this. I promised.”
She pulled her shoulders back and widened her smile. “Of course. I’m putting extra worry on your shoulders, and I’m sorry. I’ll manage somehow.”
“Thank you for understanding. I know my obligations toward you and these kids.” He reached into a trouser pocket and pulled out some bills. He flipped off five and pressed them into her hand. “Here’s the money I promised you.”
She glanced down at the large bills. “This is too much.”
“A wife should have her own money. You shouldn’t have to ask me for things you need. Tell me when you run out.” He put the wad away.
Melanie was touched. She hadn’t expected an outlaw to understand how important it was for a woman to have some independence. She slipped the bills into her pocket. “How long will you be gone?”
“Three or four days. Any longer and I’ll telegraph to let you know.” He smoothed her forehead with the thick pad of his thumb. “Maybe you can use the time to get acquainted with the children and make some friends among the ladies in town.”
She laughed. “That and help Joe and Jesse train circus animals.”
“You have experience at that. You trained drunks to give up their money at the card table.”
“True.”
Tait leaving was going to move her plans ahead faster than she’d expected. She wanted to get her task over with as soon as possible. Yet she compared poking around in Tait’s things and trying to leave them looking untouched to swallowing a big dose of castor oil—except the aftereffects of this medicine would last a lifetime.
The risk was always present in her mind along with the question of what he’d do if he caught her. Oh God, she couldn’t face his fury, his hurt.
On the other hand, watching everything she said and did around him was putting a strain on her. She could too easily mess up, and Tait seemed to have eyes in the back of his head. He noticed far too much. His absence would give her some breathing room.
Tait gave her a light kiss. “I was going to make up last night to you, but it won’t be possible. Becky will have to sleep with us tonight so we can watch her. I’m sorry.”
“There will be other nights.” Despite her glib reply, she was disappointed. She’d been dying to see Tait naked, feel his body pressing to hers, feel him inside her, knowing she had what other women must desire.
Just once she’d like to lie in his arms, protected and safe where she didn’t have to be the strong one. Her house with the gleaming windows and family inside began to slip away.
She had to stay focused on Ava and winning her release, not a handsome outlaw with quicksilver eyes. She cursed Judge McIlroy and the deal she’d made with the devil.
* * *
Darkness fell, and Melanie sat with Tait and the children in their suite discussing their day. Becky had crawled into her lap, and the boys worked on their traps on the floor with Tait. Warm lamplight bathed the handsome blue-and-tan sitting room, creating a cozy nest that was full of laughter.
Realization struck her from the blue. This was what a real family was like.
Tears burned behind her eyes. She’d never had this before, not even as a child. When she and Ava were small, her father had taken them to someone, usually a widow woman, until he’d finished gambling in the wee hours of the morning.
More than once she’d begged Mac Dunbar to stay with them and not go out. He’d laughed and said, “The sheep are ripe for the picking, little girl. I almost have enough to buy us a house.” But he’d always come home broke.
On her and Ava’s tenth birthday, he’d started teaching his girls to play cards, and it was then that she’d realized the truth. Her father would never want more than what he had. Inside him beat the heart of a swindler, and he loved the life of a vagabond. What’s more, he expected her and Ava to be satisfied with it too. But they weren’t. Not ever.
When Tait started building their house, she would design a room just like this.
Then a thought brought a stabbing pain in her chest. What if she found the train loot before he finished building? What if she never got to live a single day in the house she’d yearned for her whole life?
And worse, he’d know she’d betrayed him. How could she stand to see icy hatred in his beautiful eyes when she turned the money and him over to Judge McIlroy?
Becky patted her face. “Pwetty.”
“So are you, sweetheart. You’re beautiful. Are you getting sleepy?”
The girl rubbed her eyes, nodding.
“Then we should ready you for bed.” She stood and lifted the child in her arms.
Tait looked up. “Do you need me to help?”
“I can do it. Go ahead and spend some time with the boys.”
She’d just gotten Becky into a fresh nightgown when she heard a rap at the door followed by deep voices. Jack Bowdre? She listened but couldn’t make out the words. Deciding she’d find out soon enough, Melanie finished readying for bed and brushed her hair. She was weaving the auburn strands into a braid when Tait came into the room. She met his gaze.
“Jack dropped by with news. He got a telegram from our friend Sheriff Hondo Rains, saying we’d better come. We’ll still ride out at daybreak, same as we planned. But I wonder what Hondo found.”
Melanie wanted to put her arms around him and smooth the worry from his forehead, but their relationship wasn’t that kind yet. “I suppose you’ll find out soon enough. I hope you catch the murdering bastards and, when you do, kill ’em. These kids are hurting.”
“That’s what makes me maddest. I’ll be back before you can get settled in good. You can start drawing our house on paper, and I’ll order all the lumber when I return.” He looked at her funny. “You’ve changed. You’re not the same woman who almost backed out of the wedding over the children. You’ve become a mama bear.”
“I suppose I have.” Melanie tied a ribbon around the end of her braid. “Tait, do you think we can have water piped into the kitchen and a bathing room? Jesse told me about Sawyer’s, and it would be nice to be able to bathe Becky in a real bathtub like we have here at the hotel.”
Tait kissed her cheek. “You can have anything your heart desires.”
Except to both be able to tell Judge McIlroy to take a long walk off a short pier and have Ava free.
What would she do about her marriage once Ava was out of jail and Tait was in?
Divorce? Or stay married? A small sob escaped her.
Concern crossed Tait’s tanned features. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. I was blocking a sneeze, that’s all.” Struggling for composure, Melanie turned the covers aside and slipped between them, facing the wall.
What did it matter? He was a murderer, a criminal.
A small voice in her head whispered, So are you. Admit how many you swindled, cheated, robbed. He robbed a railroad company, whereas you took men’s savings, took food off their families’ tables. Tell Tait how many times you left town in the dead of night to avoid an angry mob. Tell him about the men you slept with just to feel their touch, to banish the loneliness, men whose names you never knew.
Memories pressed so close she could taste them. Mem
ories she’d do anything to keep silent. Memories of things she’d done that would probably turn Tait Trinity’s stomach.
The bedroom was quiet, and behind her came the quiet thud of boots hitting the floor, the rustle of clothing as Tait undressed. She fought desire to turn over, to see his lean body—just in case he didn’t make it back. With a bounty on his head and men searching for him high and low, every time he rode out, the odds got slimmer that he would return.
Becky’s breathing slowed, telling her the girl was asleep. Melanie tucked the covers around her.
The mattress shifted when Tait sat on the edge. “’Night, Mellie,” he said softly and turned out the light.
“Good night, Tait,” she mumbled. “I’ll see you off in the morning.”
She’d be a good wife and make sure his stomach was filled before he rode away. She could play the role even if she couldn’t live it, and maybe he wouldn’t hate her quite so much when it was all said and done.
* * *
It was still dark outside when Tait awoke and dressed. He tiptoed to the window and glanced out at the lightening sky.
Melanie raised. “Is it time?”
“Yeah, go back to sleep.”
“No, I want to see you off.” She eased away from Becky’s side and quickly dressed while he buckled his gun belt and pulled on his boots.
“You don’t have to do this, Mellie.”
“The children should sleep a bit longer. I want to see you off,” she insisted.
Tait shook his head and eased the door of the suite shut. It seemed natural, in a way, to rest his hand against the small of her back. After all, they’d vowed to spend the rest of their lives together. What was one touch? The gray sky turned a pale pink as they made their way out to the café. Few people were up yet, so they had their pick of tables.
Sid Truman, the owner of the Blue Goose, brought coffee over. “You folks are up early.”
“A little. Me and Jack’re riding out. Thanks for the coffee.” Tait accepted the full cup. “Sid, I’d appreciate it if you can bring my wife some hot tea.”