The comfort those words gave me eased my troubled heart. I couldn’t help but fall more in love with the man standing beside me. “Is it too soon for me to ask how you’re doing with seeing your parents? Or do you want to get through tonight first?”
“Let’s get through tonight; then we can talk until morning.”
“Perfect.”
“And Haze?”
“Yes?”
“I also want you to tell me all your thoughts on Max.”
I snickered. “Trust me, they aren’t nice.”
“I know.” He nodded. “That’s why I want to hear them all.”
When we arrived at the nightclub, I was completely out of my element. Yet still, Ian kept my hand wrapped in his as we wandered through the club. People were packed in like sardines. Everyone and their mama were in that place for the night, chatting it up and kissing the asses of the boys of the Wreckage, singing their praises. It was so strange seeing how much people loved the band. It was . . . powerful.
The guys all interacted as if they belonged too. Even though Eric was underage, there must’ve been an “I am becoming famous” clause, because he was allowed into the club too. Plus, I was allowed in because I was on Ian’s arm.
“I’m going to run to the bathroom,” I said to Ian, giving his hand a squeeze. He hadn’t let go of me since we’d walked inside, and I was so happy for his touch. He gave me the comfort I hadn’t known I needed.
“I’ll wait here,” he said, stepping to the side of the bathroom.
“You can wander. I’ll find you.”
He grinned. “I’ll wait here.”
I headed to the bathroom to refocus my mind, because I truly felt as if I’d stepped into the twilight zone.
As I walked into the bathroom, I noticed two women—twins, it appeared—reapplying their lipstick. “Did you see that Ian Parker is here?” one asked.
“Yes. And holy crap, is he hot,” her twin echoed.
“Dibs!” the other said.
“Not fair,” the other pouted. “Then again, the drummer is hot. I could go for him too.”
She pushed her boobs together and smirked before looking toward me with a confused look.
“Um, can I help you?” she questioned, looking me up and down like I didn’t belong. Then again, she might’ve been looking at me so strangely because I was being a complete creeper and staring at them in the bathroom as I eavesdropped on their conversation about my boyfriend.
“Oh, uh, no. Sorry. Are you in line?” I asked, pointing to the bathroom stalls. The completely empty bathroom stalls. I wanted to crawl into a ball and rock in a corner because of how awkward I was.
“Um, no, sweetheart. It’s all yours.”
I hurried into the stall and shut the door. I pounded my hand against my forehead, feeling ridiculous. How humiliating.
After I heard them leave, I took a few deep breaths and walked out of the stall. I stared into the mirror and tried to erase how beautiful those women were. “Dirt roads, bonfires, Holly’s cooking,” I murmured, reminding myself what was real and what truly mattered.
The moment I stepped outside of the bathroom, an uneasy feeling rushed through me as I noticed Ian was missing. My eyes danced around the space in search of him, and as I began to walk off to find him, I heard my name being called. I turned around to see Max Fucking Dickhead in an overpriced suit.
I raised an eyebrow. “Yes?”
“I thought that was you. It’s nice to see you again.”
“It’s nice to see you too,” I lied, giving him a small, fake smile. “I’m sorry, I was just off to find Ian,” I started, stepping off.
He held his hand out and pointed across the room. “Oh, he’s right there, talking to the Romper twins. They’re up-and-coming vocalists. Just as hot on the scene as the Wreckage.”
I looked up to see the two beauties from the bathroom, and my stomach dropped.
They were flirting with Ian, touching his shoulders and tossing their heads back in laughter, as Ian kept his hands to himself with a small, uncomfortable smile.
“I sent him off to chat with them. You know, networking and all,” Max explained. He stuffed his hands into his tailored pants and swayed back and forth. “I’m glad I bumped into you, actually. I was hoping to get to know more about Ms. Hazel Stone.”
“There’s not much to know, actually.”
He chuckled. “Humble, huh? That’s nice. You don’t run across a lot of humble people where I come from. I must admit, I almost feel as if I know you from the amount of times that Ian brings you up. You two must’ve been dating for ages.”
“Not that long, actually. We connected over the summer, and we actually only made it official right before Ian went out to Los Angeles to work with you.”
“Oh? That’s surprising. So it’s not too much of a serious relationship,” he remarked. I didn’t like the way he said those words.
“I disagree with that. We are very close. We mean the world to one another.”
“Yeah, I’m sure that’s true. Young love and all. I just worry about how that’s going to shape the future of his career, you know, having him be with someone like you.”
“Excuse me? Someone like me?”
“You know: a single mother. You do have a child, right?”
I remained quiet and didn’t find the tone of his question to be to my liking. And obviously, he knew things about me.
He gave me another smile. I didn’t return the gesture this time.
“I have to ask, is the kid Ian’s? Just from a marketing point of view, these things are important to know.”
“No, it’s not, but it is a pretty private situation that I don’t feel comfortable talking about. Now, if you’d excuse me—” I pushed past him but froze in place when he spoke again.
“I just worry about the headlines that your relationship with Ian could bring to the forefront. Like the fact that your mother is in prison for running a meth lab.”
“You’re crossing so many lines right now,” I barked toward him, barging back in front of his face. “I don’t know how you know about my mother, but it is truly none of your business.”
“But it is. With a quick Google search, you can find out everything there is to know about anyone on this planet. How do you think it will look when people get ahold of the fact that Ian is in a relationship with a meth addict?”
“What? No. I’ve never used drugs. I don’t have a problem. I’m not my mother.”
“But what does that matter? The internet will make you your mother. They will twist the story and spin a web of lies. They will make it seem as if Ian, too, is a drug addict. They will shut down his flame before he even has a minute to burn, and for what? For a girl he hadn’t even been serious about before the beginning of the summer? Is that what you want for him? Do you really want to kill his chance at fame for a love story that might not even be everlasting?”
My mouth parted to speak, but no words came out. It was as if Max had stolen every ounce of courage from my bones as he stared my way. What I hated most was how there was so much truth to his words. Those same thoughts had been flying through my mind for weeks now. How would it look if I were on Ian’s arm, especially now with Rosie in the picture? What would people say? How would people judge us?
What would happen to his career?
“I can tell that it’s sinking in. I can tell you’re putting the pieces together in your mind. I’m not trying to be the bad guy, but if that’s how I’m coming off, so be it. I’ll take that bullet in order to make sure that these guys get the best shot at a career. I’ve been doing my job for a long time, and I know what it looks like when people have the ‘it’ factor. Ian Parker has it in waves. All I’m asking is that you don’t weigh him down. You have to let him fly. They are getting ready to soar. Break it to him sooner than later. It will be harder if you drag it. I mean, I get it.”
“You don’t,” I snapped.
“Trust me, I do. You both are from the same world
. His parents are druggies, and yours are too.”
“That’s not the reason I connect with him. You have no clue.”
Dirt roads. Bonfires. Holly’s cooking.
“Sweetheart, it is. You’re from the same world, but Ian? He’s on his way to a whole new planet. I mean, look at him,” he said, gesturing again toward the twins and Ian. “That’s his future. Those are the kind of women he needs on his arm. Just be content with being a part of his past. It will end up being a good story to tell your grandkids someday, that you dated Ian Parker, the superstar, for a short period of time.”
I didn’t say another word to Max.
Max Fucking Dickhead.
The man who spoke the truth even when my heart didn’t want to hear it.
I walked away from him and headed straight in Ian’s direction. The nerves that were shooting through me eased as he looked up toward me and gave me his smile. Not his famous Ian Parker smile but his real grin. The one that he saved only for me.
That’s real. We’re real.
I stepped in front of the twins, and Ian held his hand out toward me. I took it into mine, and I felt at home once more. Sure, I didn’t look like the ladies surrounding me, but Ian looked my way as if I were the most beautiful woman alive.
He pulled me into his side and gave me a tight squeeze. More comfort. “Erin and Trina, this is Hazel, my girlfriend.”
They looked at me as if I were trash, and I couldn’t help but smile. I held my hand out toward them for handshakes. “Nice to meet you,” I said.
“Same,” they replied in unison.
Ian leaned into me and whispered against my ear. “Can we get the hell out of here, put on pajamas, and order room service?”
“You’re speaking my language.”
We excused ourselves from the conversation, and I swore the twins were left dazed and confused. Ian had a car waiting for him out back, and when we stepped outside, he looked deep in thought as he studied the sky.
My fingers fidgeted together as Max’s words played over and over again in my head. I wanted to tune them out and allow my feelings for Ian to be the strongest thing in the world, but it was impossible not to feel an ache in my heart.
If Max had been able to find out that information about my past in a short period of time, I was certain others could too.
Ian and I had happened so fast. We hadn’t even had a chance to fully wrap our heads around the idea of us being together before he’d been off to Los Angeles. Then, after that, everything with Rosie had happened, which had added another wrench to our situation.
We were still so fresh, so new to the possibility of our love story, that we hadn’t had a chance to really be concrete about it all.
Ian kept looking up at the sky, and I kept looking at him. “You know . . . every night since I’ve been gone, I’d go outside and look up at the moon. I’d sit there for a while staring at it in all its phases, and I’d feel a weird sense of comfort. Los Angeles is different, Haze. It’s a land of its own, and there’s so many people, but it’s as if no one really knows or cares for each other. It’s not personal. It’s stiff. Don’t get me wrong—I’m happy for what I’ve been given. The opportunities have been out of this world. But it gets lonely, and I miss home. So when I look up to the moon, I feel a little bit better. Because I know you’re staring at the same thing back in Eres.”
He didn’t have a clue how much comfort his words gave to me.
We’d crawled into bed after stuffing our faces with deep-fried foods. It was the first time we’d been able to truly talk about everything that had happened with his parents. I didn’t want to push him, but I was happy when he brought it up all on his own.
“I want to pretend that it didn’t fuck with my head, but it did. I want to pretend I didn’t pray they’d choose me, but I did. I want to pretend I didn’t drink to get through the show tonight, but I did. I’m a mess, Haze, and seeing them in the shape that they were screwed with my head so much. I just want to stop for a while and not be forced to act happy like I had to at the party tonight. I don’t want to do shows feeling miserable, but I have to do it. If I didn’t, I’m not only fucking myself over, but I’m screwing the guys up too. This isn’t just my dream—it’s theirs, and I can’t pull back because it would affect so many more people than just me.”
“The guys will understand, Ian. If anything, those three get it the most.”
He grimaced. “But then there’s Max.”
“Screw him,” I bellowed, feeling my skin crawl at the mention of him. “Like I said before, he works for you. He makes your life easier, not the other way around.”
Still, Ian didn’t seem convinced, so I dropped that angle. “Well, at least for tonight, you don’t have to act happy or be ‘on.’ You can be whatever you need to be, and I’ll be here for you. I’m not going anywhere.”
“Promise?” he whispered with a crack in his voice. He sounded so heartbroken. “Promise me you won’t abandon me too?”
“I promise.”
He held me close and fell apart against me that night.
I stayed close enough to make sure I was able to pick up his broken pieces. And when we made love, I hoped he felt forever against my lips.
34
HAZEL
The moment I landed back in Nebraska, I drove the few hours to make it to Eres, and I headed straight to Big Paw and Holly’s to pick up Rosie. I knew it had only been two days, but gosh, I missed that little girl. It felt like I had a big hole in me.
“Thank you for watching her,” I told Big Paw as I took Rosie into my arms. Holly stood nearby with that sweet smile on her face.
“Anytime,” Big Paw said, grumbling. “Even if she threw up in my face.”
I laughed. “She has a way of doing that. I was hoping I could talk to you both about Ian . . . I’m a little worried.”
Those words made his grandparents’ eyes widen with worry.
“What is it?” Holly asked. “What’s wrong with him?”
“He ran into his parents; that’s why he wanted me to come out there. They used him and asked him for money. I think he’s really struggling right now, trying to figure all those things out.”
“Son of a bitch,” Big Paw grumbled, taking off his hat and slapping it against his leg. “See, Holly! This is what I said would happen! I said the moment that boy found success, those two would come trying to claim some of it.”
Holly frowned and nodded knowingly. “How’s our boy doing?” she asked, her brows low. I saw the worry in her eyes, and I couldn’t blame her.
“He’s struggling,” I explained. “But he’s strong. He’ll be okay.”
“I don’t get why they couldn’t just let him be,” Big Paw huffed. “He was doing good on his own. They didn’t need to come and piss on his parade.”
“Yeah. I feel the same way. If only we could control the choices of others, life would be easier.” I soothed a fussy Rosie in my arms as Big Paw kept frowning.
“Get that girl home, and get her a bottle. And hold her up a bit higher; it makes her stop fussing so much.”
I did as he said, and like magic, Rosie calmed down.
Who would’ve ever thought?
Big Paw—the baby whisperer.
Rosie and I headed home, and when I unlocked the front door, I placed Rosie’s car seat down on the ground to turn on the lights.
“Oh my gosh!” I gasped as the room filled with light. In the middle of the living room was a battered and bruised Garrett, hunched over. “Garrett, what happened to you?” I hurried to his side to help him up but stopped the moment I heard another voice.
“He didn’t listen—that’s what happened to him.”
I turned around to see Charlie standing next to Rosie’s car seat.
Every hair on my body stood up as he bent down and lifted Rosie into his arms.
“Put her down,” I ordered, charging toward him, and he released a sinister laugh.
“What makes you think you can tell me wh
at to do?” he hissed. “After the shit you pulled, getting me locked up for all that time, making my business suffer, you think you can order me around?”
I tried to control my trembling, but watching him hold Rosie sent a wave of panic through me.
“Looks like you built yourself a nice life out here,” Charlie commented. “Living the dream, are we? I heard rumors about you dating Eres’s own rock star too. That must be great.”
“What do you want?” I asked, wanting him to get to the point. Rosie began crying, and Charlie sat down on the couch with her and began bouncing her on his knee.
“What do you think I want? What’s mine. I lost thousands of dollars because of that stunt you pulled. I lost clients. I got the uppers chewing my ass out because of you. If it wasn’t for your mom, I’d still be locked up. So I’m here to collect. Every cent you have is mine. Every paycheck that you get from this lame-ass job comes to me. And your happy ending you think you got? The love story with your rock star? That comes to an end.”
“Leave Ian out of this.”
“Oh, no way. You see, my other half is locked up because of you for the next two years. Why should you get a love story when I don’t get mine?”
“You don’t love my mother,” I barked. “You never did. You loved controlling her, just like you love controlling everything. I mean, look at what you did to your own nephew!”
“He betrayed me!” Charlie shouted, standing up and gesturing toward Garrett with one hand and holding my screaming sister in the other. “The asshole betrayed me when he helped you get Rosie, and he’s going to be paying for it each day until he proves I can trust him again.”
“He did the right thing.”
“Fuck the right thing. Do I seem like someone who cares about the right thing?” he argued. He took a deep breath and sat back down. “Sorry. Sometimes my temper gets the best of me. I took a meditation class while I was locked up—I’m working on my breathing techniques. Anyway, as I was saying. You break things off with that boyfriend of yours.”
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