We were camped out in the living room. I was sitting on the sofa and he was sitting on the loveseat right across from me. We were out of our wet clothes. I was wearing a long ankle length, white satin lounging shirt. I gave him the only thing he could fit, which was my husband’s robe that must’ve slipped through the cracks when I was throwing away everything that reminded me of him. I must admit that Jaylin made the robe look good. I was upset, because I didn’t have any food to offer him—food that didn’t need to be cooked. However, when I mentioned that I had a bar downstairs, he asked me to lead the way. He scanned the selection while holding a candle, and quickly pulled out a bottle of Remy. I grabbed two glasses and we settled back into the living room, under the aura of the candlelight. I turned on an old radio I found, that only needed batteries to operate. I found a station that was playing slow songs. After downing two glasses of the alcohol, I became a little tipsy. After all, I didn’t drink, but under the circumstances I was willing to do anything to alleviate the pain.
“You never told me why you were strolling the beach at midnight,” I said.
“I couldn’t sleep.”
“Why? What’s your story?”
He didn’t hesitate to answer. “I’ll just say that my story is not much different than yours.”
I sat shocked, while he revealed his reason for not always being able to rest peacefully at night. Jaylin had a lot going on, and sometimes, he didn’t like being alone. Today marked a year since he’d been divorced from his wife. When he disclosed why she left him, I was flabbergasted. I was stunned to find out our situations were almost identical. He’d cheated on his wife with a former lover, and she became pregnant with their child. He confessed that he still loved his ex-wife dearly, but said that the two of them were better off today. I could sense that the whole ordeal had taken a toll on him, just as my situation had taken one on me.
I got up from the sofa and sat beside him on the loveseat. “I’m sorry,” I said compassionately as I hugged him. Moments later, I broke away from the embrace. “Why did you do it?” I questioned as I turned his face toward me. “Why do men cheat when they say they love you?”
He released a deep breath. “I can’t speak for other men, but I’m willing to admit that I fucked up. I’m not perfect, and everyone knows, especially my wife, that I will always love her.”
“You referred to her as your wife. Do you always do that, even though the two of you are divorced?” I thought that was kind of peculiar, especially since they’d been divorced for a year.
“She’ll always be my wife. I don’t care if she marries someone else one, five, ten or twenty years from now. No other woman has had my heart quite like she has. It definitely belongs to her.”
“What about the other woman?” I was curious to know how he felt about her. My husband said the woman he cheated with didn’t mean anything. I was still trying to figure out if that was good or bad. “Do you love her too?”
“Yes, I do love her. She has my son and we’ve been through a lot. But I’m not in love with her, like I am in love with my wife. Basically, there is no comparison, even though many people believe there is.”
I got so angry. He sounded just like my husband about how much he loved me, but yet still cheated.
“You mentioned the definition of a mistake. If you know it’s a mistake, then why go there to begin with?” I had to get clarity, even though I highly doubted I’d understand how men operated.
“I cheated with the notion that she’d never find out, and it wasn’t my intentions to hurt her. I do deeply regret how much I hurt my wife; however, by no means do I regret my son. He was a blessing to me, not a mistake. It took a while for her to accept him, but she now loves him as if he were her own. Sometimes, you have to realize that you can’t go back and change things. All you can do is figure out the best way forward.”
“That’s going to be very difficult for me to do. To me, the child would be an everyday reminder of your infidelity. How is she able to deal with that?”
“It wasn’t easy, trust me. But Nokea is a special kind of woman. That’s why I love her so much. She would never take my indiscretion and use it as a reason to dislike my child. He’s innocent in all of this. Her love for me guarantees much love for him. As for ending our marriage, she did what she saw fit. I couldn’t fight that, no matter how hard I tried.”
I swallowed hard, as the feeling of me possibly accepting my husband’s child he fathered outside of our marriage, almost suffocated me.
“As for your situation,” he continued on. “I’ll ask you what I asked her in the beginning, because you never know what you’re capable of doing until you try. Why get married if you’re willing to throw in the towel after just one affair? Why get married if you’re not willing to go through the storm and fight for your marriage? Why get married—”
Tears streamed from my eyes. “Why get married if you couldn’t forsake all others?”
He held out his hands, defending his actions. “Sometimes, shit happens. No one can predict the future and our lives are so unpredictable. You know, deep in your heart, if your husband is capable of doing right by you. You’re the one who knows if he can really make things right and not put you back on this path again. I don’t have all of the answers. All I can do is tell you how it all turned out for me. We all know that men do stupid shit in the heat of passion, or without thinking logically, but many of us are not out to hurt the ones we love. I suggest that you hear your husband out and consider giving him another chance, if he deserves it. Again, you’re the one who knows that better than me.”
Jaylin reached out to wipe my tears. I felt a little better, but this was so hard for me because I was still deeply in love with my husband. I wanted us to reconcile our differences, but in no way was I there yet, like his wife appeared to be.
“I . . . I guess I could try.” He smiled from my response. “If you and your wife ever got back together, do you think you could be the husband you know she truly deserves?”
“Honestly, no,” he answered without hesitation. “I realized, through all of this, that I could never settle down with one woman and do right by her. She knows that I can’t, so we don’t have to go around pretending and arguing anymore over something that will never be. But that’s me. Your husband may not operate like I do, and you shouldn’t compare him to other men, because he’s his own man. Just because a man refuses to be with one woman, it doesn’t make him a bad person. You’ve got to consider other things about him too; things that you must take into consideration before you make your decision.”
I knew my husband was a good man, and I wanted to believe that he didn’t do any of this to hurt me. Still, I just didn’t know if he could forever be faithful.
“Most women are strong; however, we can be vulnerable as well. Men don’t understand what infidelity does to our self-esteem. It knocks us off that pedestal we thought we were on. When a man cheats, we’re left wondering what we could’ve done better, or been better at, that would’ve held his interest. We wonder what the other women have that we don’t. We question and evaluate everything in our life, big or small, until we finally realize it wasn’t us but the men in our lives. You say that losing your wife hurt, but can you imagine the pain she felt? It’s a thousand times worse and it’s how I feel right now. That’s why I don’t really know what I will ultimately do.”
Jaylin put his arms around me, and I laid my head on his chest. Silence fell between us, as I felt peace and tranquility in this man’s arms. I was so at ease; I never wanted to leave from them. My ears tuned into the radio. The song that bellowed from the speakers was a guy pleading to his lady to take him back after his affair. I assumed the song hit home for him because it hit home for me too.
I turned his face toward me, noticing a glassy look in his eyes. I guess this conversation may have been too much for him. It was too much for me too, and as we continued to sit in silence, I couldn’t help but release more emotions. He continued to kiss my tears
away, and when his lips descended upon mines, my heart almost stopped beating. His lips were so soft, as he kissed me tenderly. He kissed me deeper. When his tongue slipped into my mouth, my body heated instantly to a dangerous degree. My chest started palpitating, as my tongue did rotations in his mouth. We continued French kissing, and while his hand roamed underneath my long shirt, I immediately tensed up. He stroked my nipples until they were erect. It had been months since my last sexual encounter, but I couldn’t believe the way my body was responding to a stranger. It felt like he was waking my body up from a coma; it never felt like this. My body clearly wanted . . . needed this man, and it wasn’t taking no for an answer. Who was I to tell it otherwise?
“Why are you taking advantage of me?” I asked in a soft whisper.
“That’s not what I’m doing, but if you want me to stop, just tell me and I will. All I want to do is take away some of this pain.” He spoke breathlessly between kisses.
“No. Please don’t stop,” I moaned. “I need this, and I want the pain to stop, even if it’s only for one night.”
With that being said, he didn’t stop. He laid me down on the sofa and kissed me intensively. I quickly untied the sash on his robe, which exposed his rippled chest. I closed my eyes and rubbed my hands up and down his chest. His chest was so chiseled. He kissed a trail from my lips all the way to my neck. He didn’t leave one single area of my neck untouched, before he moved further down. He pulled off my shirt and freed my triple D’s. He palmed my breasts that looked like two cantaloupes in his hand. He stared at them in amazement before he kneeled down. His tongue made contact with my nipple and I wanted to scream. He sucked, licked, and bit my nipples with so much precision that I did scream. It wasn’t a scream of pain, but total pleasure.
As we both were naked, I lay mesmerized by his body. There was certainly nothing quite like it. He was so strong. He had muscles protruding from everywhere. With a body like that, I figured he had to exercise every day, maybe even twice a day. His body wasn’t the only thing that had me mesmerized. I couldn’t keep my eyes off of his nine-and-a-half inches of wonderfulness between his legs. I must say that it looked good enough to have for breakfast, lunch, dinner, brunch, snack, dessert and Taco Bell’s fourth meal. Besides my husband, I never wanted a man so much before in my life. He stared into my eyes for any signs of protest, before inserting himself. When I didn’t give him any gripe, he went for it.
He felt so good inside of me that I wanted to cry. When I came, he aggressively picked me up and pinned me on the wall near the sliding glass door. With my legs wrapped around his waist, and my arms around his neck, he looked into my eyes with so much lust and kissed me feverishly. The heat that was radiating off of our bodies, I just knew it was going to set off the smoke detector. Even though the rained poured heavily, and the thunder intensified, the weather outside was no match for the explosion we were causing inside. We were brewing up our own category 10 hurricane. He ignited a fire in me that I knew even the firefighters wouldn’t be able to put out. Within minutes, our bodies exploded and I started shivering like I was having a seizure. I yelled out his name so loudly, it could be heard for miles. Maybe even the people in the surrounding states heard me. His body trembled too, as we slid down the wall in ecstasy together.
In retrospect, I solely believed that things happened for a reason. God brought people into your life for a reason. It was fate that brought Jaylin to me that night on the beach. He knew that we needed each other in more ways than one. He helped me understand why men cheat and the reasoning behind it. He gave me insight of how men think, but made me aware that they’re all very different. I helped him understand a women’s pain, after her heart has been broken, due to a husband’s infidelity. In just a few hours, we cleansed each other’s mind, soul and definitely body. Upon meeting Jaylin, I was on the verge of a mental breakdown. I was depressed, and I cried several times a day, wondering what I could’ve done better. When he left the next morning, it was almost like I was cured. I no longer felt somber, instead I felt lively. I hadn’t cried since that night, and I no longer asked myself, what I could have done better.
Instead, I asked God to guide me every day. I felt like I had a new lease on life, and I thanked Jaylin Jerome Rogers for that. I wanted to tell him that, but I haven’t seen nor talked to him since that night. I didn’t know where he lived, and I didn’t want to seem like a stalker if I looked him up by his name. I decided to leave well enough alone. I figured we served our purpose for each other, just that one night.
The doorbell ringing again snapped me out of my daze. I sighed deeply as I prepared myself to see my husband, whom I haven’t seen in months, and his newborn son for the first time. I turned the doorknob and a smile immediately etched across my face. Saying I was happy and shocked was an understatement.
“Jaylin?” I questioned as I felt my breathing intensify. Thinking back to the night when we’d had sex, it made my body temperature rise. I trembled and tingled in all the right places.
“What’s up,” he said. His eyes roamed all over me. “You look fine as ever.”
Before I could utter another word, he rushed in, grabbed my face and kissed me like there was no tomorrow. When his tongue entered my mouth, my body felt like it had engulfed into flames. After all of these months, he still triggered something in my body that no one ever had. He had my hormones jumping sporadically. My body needed this man, and it needed him now. We kissed all the way into the living room. He led me to the same sofa he had me on months ago. He lifted my dress over my head and eased my panties down. I removed his jacket and anxiously unbuttoned his shirt. I couldn’t wait to rub my hands down his chest. After I did just that, I moved down to the main attraction. I unzipped his pants, and he stepped out of them. I quickly freed his dick from his boxers. It looked so beautiful; it felt like I was looking at it for the first time. The way I was staring at it you would’ve thought I was holding the antidote to cure cancer. He laid me down, and my body trembled with anticipation. Before he entered me, I heard . . .
“Amaya!”
My body froze up. That wasn’t Jaylin calling my name. I cautiously looked to the side, and saw my husband with an irate look locked on his face. He held a car seat in his hand that occupied his sleeping son. Damn! I thought. Now, I was the one who had some explaining to do. Jaylin was right. Life was so unpredictable.
LEAVE THE PANTIES AT HOME
Tiffani Warren
To say I was nervous would be an understatement. My eyes shifted to the clock on the wall, and for the last several hours, I hadn’t heard one single word my business partners had said to me. With my legs crossed, I kept nodding and agreeing with what they were saying, but there was only one thing that consumed mind. Meeting Jaylin Rogers. I visualized what he would look like in person, even though I’d seen many pictures of him before. Through reading every single book in the Naughty Series, I had a clear picture of him sketched in my head. I wondered what he’d wear today, and all I kept thinking about was seeing those addictive eyes.
I wasn’t the least bit worried about him liking me, because I was a beautiful, educated woman with curves at my hips that drove most men insane. My hair was almost all cut off, but I kept it trimmed and neat. When Jaylin reached out to me on Facebook, I wasn’t surprised. We clicked immediately and checked in with each other almost every day. Then, one day, he asked if we could meet.
Normally, I wouldn’t hook up with anyone I met on the internet. But after watching Jaylin’s interaction with women online, I kind of felt as if I’d gotten to know him. I mean, there were moments that made me kind of skeptical about him, and some of the things he injected in his comments were rather jaw-dropping. For now, I pushed all of that aside and decided to get up close and personal with the man behind all of this madness. Some women loved him, others hated him. Men were trying to figure out what in the hell Jaylin had been drinking to get so many women, and some were simply jealous. Then there were those who insisted that you had to meet
him in the flesh, in order to know the real deal.
The meeting wrapped up and the limo took me to the Four Seasons Hotel in NYC. Jaylin told me that he had reserved the penthouse suite that overlooked Manhattan. I made my way to it, looking dynamite in a white, short jumper outfit. A gold belt was secured around my tiny waist, and my model-like brown legs were on display. They looked as if I’d dipped them in baby oil. I sucked in a deep breath before knocking on the door and discovering what awaited me. Seconds later, the door clicked and squeaked open, yet no one was there.
“Hello,” I said, walking inside and seeing no one in sight. “Is anyone here?”
As I turned the corner, I spotted Jaylin dressed in a navy, cheap-looking suit with a royal blue wife beater underneath it. The curls on his head appeared nappy to me, and from my view, those gray eyes that I awaited were dark brown and bloodshot red. He looked high, and the smell of marijuana filling the air, pretty much confirmed that he was. At about five-six or seven, he stood by the tall glass windows, staring outside as if he were in thought. A glass was in his hand, and he sipped from it, before clearing his throat and damn near choking.
“Excuse me,” he said, holding up one finger and coughing. Coughed so hard that he looked to be foaming at the mouth. Specks of spit sprayed from his mouth, causing him to pound his chest and clear his throat again. I wasn’t sure if I should help him or not, but by the time I got my thoughts together, he seemed okay. The signature goatee that I’d seen in pictures was more like a rugged beard that was in no way trimmed. He had the nerve to stand there and scratch it, like a dog with fleas.
If Only for Another Night Page 13