Angel Dreams (An Angel Falls Book 2)

by Jody A. Kessler

  My molars clench as I will Nathaniel to shut it. Mom doesn’t need to know about last night.

  Her polite smile turns upside down as she addresses me. “Is your car okay? I saw you pull in. What happened?”

  “My car’s fine, Mom. I didn’t get much sleep last night though, and I’m really tired.” If only she knew how exhausted I am, then she would send me straight to bed.

  “But, are you all right? Who were you with?” She looks over to Nathaniel as she asks this last part.

  “Please stop with the twenty questions,” I beg of her. “I just need food and sleep right now.”

  Her lips pinch for a second and then she seems to come to a decision. “Fine. I’m dying to know what happened, but I can see you’re not in the mood to talk about it. I could use some sleep too.”

  She’s still in her work clothes and her hair is up, albeit loosely with stray strands falling down around her face, no doubt from a long shift at the hospital.

  “Get some food, and some rest, and then you’re going to tell me everything later,” she says in her perfect mom voice.

  I nod in silent agreement, and so grateful she isn’t trying to pry answers out of me.

  “Are you sure I shouldn’t be worried about something?” she asks again, her green eyes penetrating my soul, looking for some clue.

  I sigh heavily. “Only death, Mom. It comes around for everyone, you know.”

  “Not funny, Jules.” She scowls at my bad joke. “I’m going upstairs. Nice to meet you, Nathaniel.”

  I wish I was being funny. I walk into the kitchen, not really caring if Nathaniel follows or not. Mine and Jared’s survival seem like the only important thing in the world at the moment.

  As soon as I hear Mom’s bedroom door close, Nathaniel steps up close. So close we are almost touching.

  He whispers, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry about Travis, and for causing you any pain. You’ve done everything. You saved Corrine, Juliana, and I wouldn’t be back to normal — if you call this normal — without you. You’re amazing. I don’t deserve to be here with you. And you still let me in.”

  His face is a mask of torture and I want to erase all the terrible things we have been through, but I can’t. All I can do is stand here, surrounded by his warmth, his smell, and his caressing voice. It’s the most comfortable place I’ve ever known, and the most agonizing. I have to work at forming any words at all.

  “I had to do something. If it wasn’t for me, you wouldn’t have been killed in the first place.”

  “I don’t want to start arguing again, Juliana. I shouldn’t even be here now. You should run away from me.”

  “If I do, if I leave you now, you know I’ll find you when I sleep. I don’t mean to do it, Nathaniel. It just happens.”

  He lifts a hand, but then stops himself from touching me.

  I look down, staring at nothing, and whisper, “I’ll be with you as soon as I fall asleep.”

  “We’re connected spiritually.”

  “I can’t seem to break the connection. I don’t know if I want to.”

  “I don’t want you to. It goes on our inexplicable list,” he says and I see his chest rise and fall in a heavy sigh. “I won’t pretend I’m a good thing in your life. You’re the most unbelievably beautiful and amazing person I’ve ever met. I was such a fool to think I could walk away. Juliana, I’m here now and I want to be with you. I want to know you and if it’s only in your dreams, then I’ll take it.”

  A shudder passes through my soul. Every instinct in my body is telling me to melt into his arms and never let go, but my head is resisting. How can I fall for someone who isn’t even alive? How can it ever work? How can I be thinking about any of this when I don’t even know if Jared is alive.

  “Nathaniel, I need to find my brother,” I say in the darkness of closed eyelids. “We have time, but Jared doesn’t. I’m leaving to go look for him.”

  “No, you’re not,” he says ever so gently as he shakes his head. I take a step back and look into his heart-meltingly gorgeous face.

  Every second could be critical. A tight knot in my chest clenches. “It could be too late already,” I say.

  “Juliana, you can go. I won’t stop you, but I can find him faster, and be back to tell you in minutes, or even seconds. I can move with my thoughts, remember?”

  I stare at him like he’s a godsend. I hadn’t thought of it. Of course he should go. “Really? You’ll do that?”

  I move in close to him and rest my cheek against his chest. His arms wrap around me and he holds me tight against his solid body.

  “I’ll be right back, if it’s what you want.”

  There are no words to express the feelings of relief and the comfort of his touch as they wash through me. He’ll find Jared for me. All I can do is nod and attempt to swallow the lump in my throat.

  I take a deep breath and look up at him. His pewter colored eyes search my face. His gaze lingers on my mouth and then slowly lifts back to my eyes. “I’ll find him, Juliana,” he says, and then he vanishes from my arms.

  Chapter Twenty-five: Saving a Life

  Nathaniel

  Jared Crowson isn’t difficult to find. What is difficult, is explaining to my mentor, Marcus, why I’m still interested in my previous case, what I’m doing there, and most of all, telling Juliana what I’ve found.

  I recognize the room and Jared’s company instantly. Patrick Dawson sits on the floor of his bedroom hunched over a pad of paper. His drawing resembles some sort of medieval monster, but I don’t have time to study it. I shut down my empathy for Patrick as I realize he’s completely unaware of his father’s death, and turn toward Jared. He appears to be asleep on the bed. Marcus takes one look at me and then looks down at Jared. His knowing eyes and his somber face leave no doubt as to what is going on in here. Without saying a word I understand the situation. One look at Jared is all it takes for me to see he is too still, his breathing is too shallow.

  Marcus walks over to me by the door. “I wouldn’t have believed it, if I wasn’t seein’ you with my own eyes. I knew you’d figure it out, my friend.”

  “I had some help,” I say, acknowledging his statements about my transformation. “You probably haven’t heard, but the warlock passed.”

  “Oh, I’ve heard. It’s the only reason I’m inside this house. Harmony has a way about her. Travis escaping would have been devastating.”

  I nod in agreement then look over at Jared. “He’s close?”

  “It’s what I was expectin’. He likes to escape reality too much,” Marcus says. “They stayed awake all night on some kind of speed and then when they got back here, he swallowed some pills to bring him back down. He isn’t going to wake up this time. His heart is barely beatin’.”

  “Excuse me. I need to check in with someone. It can’t wait,” I say and then leave the room.

  ∞

  “Juliana, he’s at Corrine’s house. I’ll drive if you want.”

  Her exhausted eyes meet mine as I tell her I’ve found her brother. She bites her lower lip and then tucks her hair behind an ear. Then as if her switch had been flipped, she jumps out of the kitchen chair and rushes toward the front door.

  “Is he…” She grabs her keys from a hook on the wall and digs in a brown leather purse hanging from another hook. Cell phone in hand she heads outside without finishing her question.

  “Here,” I say, and take the keys from her.

  “Are you sure? I mean, can you stay like that long enough to drive?” she asks, referring to my physical body.

  “I’m strong right now, so don’t worry about that. You shouldn’t drive. I’ll tell you everything while you tell me how to get to the Dawson’s, by car.”

  ∞

  As we pull into the driveway, I see Juliana stiffen, if that’s at all possible. She already has so much tension, I’m afraid she might shatter if I hit a bump in the road.

  “Travis is gone for good,” I say.

  She looks at me and h
er face is paler than normal, and so sorrowful I wish I could hold her right here in the car and tell her everything is fine and right with the world. But holding back reality doesn’t change anything and it certainly doesn’t help either. I wonder if she was even thinking about Travis at all. She doesn’t respond with words, only turns back to the approaching house. We both see Corrine’s mother’s car parked in front of the house, but again, neither of us say anything. So they had made it here before us. Does anyone in the house know Jared is on the brink of slipping away? Are we too late already?

  Behind us, I hear the wail of the ambulance Juliana had called. As soon as the car stops she jumps out and runs inside. Because I can, I meet her in the bedroom in my spirit body.

  “Jared, wake up,” she says, as she shakes her brother’s shoulder.

  Laura, Patrick, and Corrine rush to the bedroom behind Juliana and now huddle by the door.

  “What the hell?” Patrick says.

  “What’s wrong with him?” Corrine asks.

  The three of them wear matching looks of confusion. Juliana ignores them as she tries to rouse Jared.

  “Did you go get her, Nathaniel?” Marcus asks me.

  “I did,” I say.

  “You’re disobeying the rules for no reason. He just passed,” he tells me.

  “He’s still in his body,” I argue.

  “He’s hangin’ on, but his heart’s not beatin’. Maybe he knew she was on her way.”

  Just then, Jared sits up, moving out of his body. He looks so surprised I almost laugh out loud. If this were a typical case for me, I would introduce myself and ask if he understood what was happening. But nothing about this day fit into any category that includes the words typical or normal.

  Seeing her brother move away from his physical body startles Juliana and she jerks back a couple inches.

  “How did you get here?” Jared asks.

  “Jared, no. Don’t do this,” she cries. Tears begin to stream down her cheeks.

  “You need to get out of here, Jules. You shouldn’t be here.”

  “Jared, look at yourself,” she says, gesturing to the body on the bed. “Go back, I need you, J. Please not yet, please.”

  He finally notices he’s not with his body. “Oh crap. Are you kidding?” he says.

  I hear the ambulance crew moving into the house. Laura calls for them to come down the hall to the bedroom. Two EMT’s rush into the room and move quickly to Jared’s supine form on the bed.

  “I love you, Jared. Please don’t leave,” Juliana sobs and lays her hands on his body.

  “I don’t want to, Jules. Shit, what did I do? So this is what idiocy looks like?” he says as if he can’t believe what he’s brought on himself. “I swear it was an accident. I’m sorry. God, I’m so damn sorry.”

  He can’t stop looking between his spirit self and his physical body on the bed. Then something seems to click and his brown eyes widen as he shifts his focus to his sister. “I should have been a better brother, Jules. Forgive me? I love you sis.” He chokes a little on this last part.

  “Wake up, Jared. Get back inside and wake up.”

  With a look of mixed astonishment and shock Jared lies back down, disappearing into his body.

  “No pulse,” the EMT says to her partner. “How long has he been like this,” she asks anyone in the room.

  “I don’t know, I don’t know,” Juliana says, her head shaking with panic. “Help him, please.”

  The other tech squeezes in next to the bed with more equipment and Juliana moves out of the way. One EMT starts unpacking an AED as the other one begins CPR. They’re going to shock his heart, I realize.

  Juliana begins to sob uncontrollably. Her pain is unbearable. I knew it would be like this from the beginning. I can’t see her this way. I’m unable to standby and do nothing. It’s not a choice for me. There’s something inside I can’t control when it comes to Juliana. It’s a frightening realization, but I can’t watch her suffer. When Travis attacked her in her sleep, I’ve never felt stronger in my entire existence. I thought I had been able to grab Travis because we were both dead, but maybe that had nothing to do with it. Seeing her in pain makes me react. Maybe I can understand Jared’s addiction after all. There are forces inside all of us that are uncontrollable.

  I pull energy from the universe and form my body, not caring about the fact that I just materialized from thin air. Marcus shakes his head at me, but I ignore him and move to Juliana. Wrapping her in my arms, she falls against me, completely overcome with despair.

  I hear Corrine’s mom gasp, “Where did he come from?”

  No one else in the room appears to care or notice. Everyone’s focus is on Jared and the EMT’s.

  “I’m sorry, love,” I say.

  “I can’t do this,” she says. “This isn’t happening.”

  She pushes me away, almost in anger, and falls down next to the bed, crying on the covers and pleading to Jared to live.

  I move up behind her and lay my hands on her shoulders, channeling the same energy I use to form my body, only this time, I send it through myself and into Juliana. This is how I’m able to help people feel better, or even heal small wounds. She doesn’t shrug me off, but instead reaches forward and places both her hands on Jared’s legs.

  I think we both feel it happen. The surge of energy increases as if she’s tapping into the same source as I am. I feel it pulling through me and passing straight through Juliana and flowing into her brother. It grows and becomes so strong I’m alarmed and almost pull my hands back. Then I see the expression on Juliana’s face shift as she realizes what is happening. She can feel it too. It encourages me to keep going.

  The paramedic on our side of the bed barks at Jules, “Hands back. Right now.”

  Juliana breaks the connection with Jared, but I feel her hesitation. She looks up at me with so much pleading and vulnerability I react without thinking.

  Relinquishing my body, I move quickly around Jules and the paramedic and place myself closer to Jared’s head and shoulders. I reach over, placing one hand on the top of his head and the other one on his chest. With every ounce of my will and focus, I pull energy from all corners of the universe and send it into Jared. The commotion around me becomes less significant than a whisper of breath in my ear. Nothing matters now except my focus.

  I catch some words that should mean something to me, “You’re making a huge mistake, Nathaniel. Stop what you’re doing.” But I ignore Marcus and continue this unexpected mission.

  “Clear,” the EMT orders.

  The pull of energy moving through me is electric, like white fire shooting down my arms and into Jared. Will this work? What am I doing? I question myself, but I don’t want to stop. The force is like supercharged magnetism. I’ve started something and I can’t let it go now.

  “Come on, Jared,” I hear the EMT say next to me.

  Then with a surge, like the sun exploding inside every cell of my being, the energy takes over and the room and all the people around me disappear. Only brilliant light, whiter than a star and completely blinding surrounds me. It’s similar to when I died in the basement of this same house. Only I have no pain this time, and the energy is moving in the opposite direction. I hear faint traces of sound from someplace I can’t locate.

  “He’s back. Hang on there, buddy.”

  “Jared,” I hear Juliana’s sobbing relief. Her voice carries above the rest, like pitch perfect notes above a drone of chaos.

  Chapter Twenty-six: Taking Things Slow

  Nathaniel

  My heart races inside my chest, which is surprising, considering I’m not in possession of a real beating heart. She’s inside the small building. It’s an old house that has been converted into an herb shop. The painted sign says Native Naturals, Herbal Medicine and Private Consultations. As anxious as I am to see Juliana, I can feel myself stalling. How long have I been gone? My rest period was longer than normal this time, but has it been two days or five? She had come
to visit me once in her sleep, but it was a different experience than before. Whatever I had done for Jared had drained me to the point of near total oblivion. When she had found me, I was unable to even speak. I could only be with her in a way like having a strong memory of someone. It was intimate and personal, but quiet and nearly without shape or form, and very different from our other dream-time encounters. Now I’m back, and I have no reason not to run inside and whisk her away. Except I can’t make myself move forward. The way things stood between us the day Jared overdosed wasn’t ideal. Would she be happy to see me? Should I be here at all?

  I swore to her I would stop all this madness. Angels and people don’t have relationships, except that we do all the time. But not the way it is with her. I’m unseen ninety-nine percent of the time. My relationships with the living are mostly one sided. Until they pass away, that is. No, this is not the same. She’s not like anyone else. There’s no comparison.

  I move closer to the glass door, wanting a glimpse of her, wanting to see if the shop is busy. Maybe I should wait until she’s finished with work. I peek inside and see orderly shelves and a long counter with a cash register, a scale, and small baskets filled with dried herbs and packages of herbal remedies. I don’t see anyone, but I know she’s inside.

  Then she walks straight out in front of me, apparently coming from a room I can’t see. She doesn’t notice me by the door as she turns her back to me. Her hair hangs loose, shining all the way down her back. It guides my eyes to keep going over other curves and down long legs causing stirrings of warmth inside me.

  She sets down the bottles she’s carrying and then brushes her hair over her shoulder as she looks over at the door. I move out of sight. Did she sense my eyes on her? Juliana sees and feels more of the supernatural world than any other human I’ve ever known, except for maybe Chris Abeyta, the shaman.

  I’m being ridiculous and letting my nerves control my actions. Stepping to the door, I push it open and do what I came to do. Visit Juliana. Moving faster than a living person could — before I change my mind again— I stand in front of the counter and wonder where she went. Then I see her, bent down organizing a shelf. She rises and turns.