Jesus, no, I did enough and had to put on the brakes even though, believe me, I wanted to. I felt ready, but then my mind was screwing
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with me. I’ll explain.” She poured them coffee and started to tell Thylane all about last night and about how, when she was approached from behind, she’d tightened up and had flashbacks of the strikes against her skin that turned into panic a couple of times.
Thylane covered her hand with hers.
“Okay, so you didn’t tell them anything? You didn’t explain exactly how Logan and Connor were abusive and what your fears were?”
“Not really. I couldn’t get specific when they asked, even though they asked, wanting to know so that they didn’t do something again that would remind me of the abuse in any way.”
Tears filled Thylane’s eyes as she smiled softly. “Aw…they’re so sweet. Who would have known for such intense men? Panther and them look so serious and ready. Each of them has something about them that stands out as leaders, as something powerful.”
“Tell me about it. Eddie has that scary-looking tattoo on his neck, and Mink has the one on his arm in red and black over those big, hard muscles, and Steve just looks at me and I feel on alert. Then there’s Panther, who basically is the leader, the oldest I believe and I don’t even know how old he is or they are, but definitely older and more experienced in every way, let me tell you.”
Thylane chuckled. “That’s a good thing, for you, but how about reciprocating the attraction and desire for them like they did for you?”
“I only ran into a little problem as I anticipated what it was like in the past. These men are not Logan and Connor. I know that, but I feel like it’s going to take some time to get comfortable enough to truly let down my guard and let them inside of me. I actually feel scared to have sex again, Thylane. I’m afraid of it hurting, of there being four of them so big and capable, yet I know it’s going to happen. I know it is, so I’m scared.”
“Well, you take your time and be honest with them. It sounds like they’ll understand.”
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“I know they will. As I mentioned a few things they didn’t seem turned off but instead upset and caring. I can see them being like your men. Wanting to touch me all the time, to keep me close. That’s a lot to get used to, a large, masculine hand just sitting on your hip.”
“Or your ass,” Thylane said and took a sip of coffee. Lauren chuckled and then Thylane did.
“I kind of like it. I feel possessed by them, like I belong to them and they belong to me and they want to make a public show of affection to warn off all other men within a large radius,” Thylane said and chuckled.
“And apparently they don’t go far so they can keep eyes on you at all times.” Lauren nodded toward the corner where Stack and Rusty spoke with Philippe.
Thylane didn’t even turn to look.
“I can feel them, Lauren. I can sense them when they’re nearby. It doesn’t matter where I am or if they weren’t right there initially. I can walk into a place and just zone in on that connection we share, and I can find them. It’s insane, but so beautiful.”
Lauren felt the tears in her eyes.
“I want that, too. I do, Thylane, but I need to feel more independent.”
“You are independent.”
“No, I mean more like…more like you. Like how you trained to be stronger physically, mentally, and got empowered by learning self-defense and how to shoot a gun.”
“You want to learn how to shoot a gun?” Thylane asked, shocked.
“I don’t know. I mean I’m scared of guns. I know it’s because of the hostage situation and how Logan held the gun to my head and kept pushing it against me as he struck me. I don’t want to feel helpless like that again.”
“There was nothing that you could have done in that situation.”
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“You reacted. When you had the opportunity, you grabbed that gun and you saved our lives before we wound up dead. I couldn’t move.”
“You were injured, beaten with two swollen eyes, broken ribs, and a broken arm.”
“Thylane, you had a broken arm and were battered, as well. The difference was you dug deeper, found that determination, that courage to fight to the end. I was broken down and terrified of Logan and Connor before that hostage situation. They had control of me, and I can’t ever let that happen to me again.”
“Panther and his team are not going to control you.”
Lauren raised her eyebrows up in challenge.
Thylane exhaled.
“Well, control you in a negative, abusive manner. When they command, when they desire your submissiveness, it will be in bringing you pleasure, in making you come, orgasm, cry out their names because you’ll love that dominance and their sexual demands.
They are not going to restrain you and beat you into submission, degrade you, and make you feel like some caged animal instead of a human being. They were monsters, Lauren. They worked for terrorists. They hated this country and what it stands for and the military they pretended to be part of. They were sick, evil bastards, and they’re dead. You’re alive, and so am I. This is our second chance. Your second chance at life. You need to embrace it, to absorb everything you can about it and surround yourself with the good, with the empowering, and take it all in because the bottom line, as we know personally, is that it can all end, all be taken away from us in a second. So embrace this. Maybe confide in the men a little more and get their feedback, even some training from them.”
Lauren smiled and then nibbled her bottom lip.
“Steve mentioned the gun range at Lake Freedman. That learning how to use a gun was empowering and helped with self-confidence.
That he could train me to be safe with a gun and to be capable. Then
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his brothers mentioned it, too. Do you think, from your own experience, that learning to touch a gun, to use it could help me?”
“I think it definitely could, but your fears come from a different place than mine. I was forced to kill to save us. I only shot a gun at targets a couple of times because of my father teaching me. It wasn’t often, and I really didn’t know all the rules and safety with it. Not until after the hostage situation when I, too, needed to feel more empowered to ensure I could give myself the best opportunities to get out of a situation. You are dealing with a whole other level of fear.
Guns were used to control you, to put fear in you, even before the hostage situation. You can’t even touch one without thinking of how it was used against you. Be sure that it’s something you want to learn and gain control of. I’m certain military men as well trained and knowledgeable as Steve and his team could help you, but you need to be upfront with them so they get the fear you have.”
“So maybe I’ll try to talk to them about it first. We’re supposed to get together for dinner tonight.”
“Oh, public place or their place?” Thylane asked and raised her eyebrows up and down.
Lauren gave her arm a light slap.
“Public.” His cheeks turned a nice shade of red, and she felt giddy inside.
“You’ll be back at their place afterward. Mark my words,”
Thylane said with a knowing grin and then took the last sip of coffee.
A few customers came up to get some snacks and coffee, and when Lauren went back over to Thylane, her men were there.
“Everything good?” Stack asked, standing behind Thylane with his hands on her shoulders. Thylane leaned back and smiled as Rusty took the seat next to her.
“It’s great. Did you guys want something to eat or drink?” Lauren asked them.
“Need you even ask, woman?” Stack asked, and they chuckled.
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Lauren slid open the case and then took out the brownie and placed it on the napkin. She couldn’t help
but to remember Mink’s brownies and how the taste test turned into tasting her, on their coffee table in their damn living room. Jesus, she would need to keep herself primed and ready at all times. Heck, she did that this morning and even wore a skirt again.
“What’s that smile for?” Thylane asked her. She looked at Stack and Rusty as they ate the brownie and moaned, telling her how delicious it was.
“Nothing, just thinking that brownies may be my new favorite treat.” She smiled as they started talking about the other desserts and asking what the best-selling treat in the place was so far.
* * * *
Steve couldn’t take his eyes off of Lauren. She was just so beautiful, so soft spoken and sweet, and definitely needed protecting.
It was instinctual, this need to care for her and watch over her. He really thought there was a special connection to her, and he couldn’t quite put his finger on it.
Panther was being kind of quiet, but Steve would catch him staring at Lauren as she spoke. Mink and Eddie did the same thing and watched her like hawks. When she got up to use the ladies’ room, they kept turning to see when she would return. What Steve hadn’t expected was the effect it had on him, and obviously the team, when other men looked at her, checked her out, and even smiled at her as she walked by. He watched her closely, and she didn’t even acknowledge those men, her eyes were glued to the table and to all of them. In fact, they must have been giving some seriously hard looks because her face flushed, and when she sat down, she looked about ready to cry.
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“What did I do wrong? Tell me and I’ll fix it.” She wiped her eye before the tear fell. Panther cupped her cheeks. She gasped, and he held her gaze.
“Not a goddamn thing wrong, baby. You’re so beautiful, so sexy, and amazing. We can’t stand to be apart.” He pressed his lips to hers and kissed her.
“Check.” Eddie called out to the waiter raising his hand, and Steve swallowed hard.
Things were uneasy still between him and his brothers-in-arms.
Yet, they all wanted Lauren. They hadn’t discussed it in a sit-down yet, but they did show the signs that they wanted her and her only to be their woman.
Panther released her lips, and she fluttered her eyes open.
“Ready to go?”
“How can I walk after a kiss like that?” she asked Panther, and he smirked.
“Oh, baby, I will carry you out of here if you like. Over the shoulder or cradled in my arms?” he asked, pulling back the chair.
She grabbed his forearm. “Oh God, Panther, don’t do that,” she said, sounding freaked out. They laughed. Panther licked his lips.
“I would do it. If it sent word to every man in this place that you’re my woman, I would do it.”
“You don’t need to. I want to be your woman, and I want you to be my man, and of course your brothers, too.” She smiled.
“Let’s take her home so we can have Lauren, I mean dessert.”
Mink winked.
“Very funny,” she said to him as Mink squeezed her shoulder.
Panther pulled her up into his arms and hugged her to him. He ran his hand over her ass and gave it a tap. Steve stood up, and Eddie paid the bill.
“Let’s go,” Panther said, and they all walked out of the restaurant together.
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Steve was sitting in the back seat with Lauren between him and Eddie. Mink drove, and Panther was in the passenger seat.
“So how did you like that place?” Mink asked her.
“Oh, it was so nice, and the food was delicious. Next time maybe we can try dessert?” she asked.
“Next time? I like the sound of making plans to take you to dinner again.” Eddie brought her hand to his lips and kissed her knuckles.
She smiled at him.
Steve reached over and caressed her knee where her legs were crossed. She looked so sexy and classy. The black dress accentuated her curves, and the heels she wore weren’t too high but made her claves and thighs look toned and sexy. He caressed back and forth.
“No need to have dessert out when we have Lauren to have at home,” Mink said to her.
“Oh really, Mink?” she asked, sounding outraged, but Steve could feel her shaking. He gave her knee a squeeze, and she looked at him.
“We thought about you all night and all day.”
“I thought about each of you, too.”
He leaned closer and kissed her lips. She tilted toward him, and he reached his hand up, gripped her dress and hip, and hoisted her onto his lap.
“Steve,” she exclaimed and had to push her dress up higher so it wouldn’t tear. He slid one hand up her thigh to help, and Eddie pushed the other side up and moved closer.
“Kiss me, baby. Take from me what you’re ready for. I need so much,” Steve said to her.
She stared at his lips, ran her palms up his chest, and he tightened up, felt insecure about the scars that she would see soon enough, perhaps tonight, if she accepted them and allowed them to make love to her. She pressed her lips softly to his and tightened at the same time.
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“I love your ass, baby, and these tiny little panties you wear. Did you wear these red ones for us?” Eddie asked and was obviously caressing her ass. She moaned.
“Red, huh? Fuck that’s hot. Get her nice and wet for us, so when we get her home, we can get a real good look at what’s going to be ours,” Panther said from the passenger seat.
“With pleasure,” Eddie said, and Lauren grabbed Steve’s shoulders, pulled from his mouth, and moaned.
“Hot damn, you’re so wet, Lauren. Your pussy is sucking my fingers in good and tight. Ride them and explore Steve some more.”
Steve gripped her hips and turned onto his back. She slid down, massaging his chest, kissing his neck, spreading her thighs wider.
“Oh yeah, look at this ass, Panther. Look at how hot our woman looks getting ready to suck Steve’s cock back here,” Eddie said and stroked her pussy. She was rocking her hips.
“Oh God, is this safe? Will someone see?” she asked.
“Gotta love government-issued tinted windows, woman. Suck that cock good and hard. Make Steve beg for mercy,” Mink said from the driver’s seat.
Steve caressed her hair from her cheeks and held her gaze.
“Only if you want to,” he said to her.
“I want to.” She undid his pants, pushed them down as he wiggled, and right before she took his cock into her mouth, she gasped and moaned against the tip.
“Fuck.”
Eddie chuckled.
“Oh, baby, I am going to be the first one to fill this ass with cock.
Holy fuck, you’re sucking my fingers in both holes right now. I’m going to come from watching you,” Eddie told her, and Steve moaned.
“I’m going to come from watching,” Panther said.
“I’m going to come from listening,” Mink said, and they chuckled.
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She was sucking and rocking her body on top of him. Steve caressed her hair from her cheek and held a grip full of her hair as she sucked up and down over his dick.
“That’s it, baby. You’re doing so good. Your mouth is incredible.
I want you, Lauren. I want to get lost inside of your body and claim you as our woman. We need you.” He rocked upward.
“Fuck. Oh fuck, I’m coming.”
She gripped his thighs, and he shot his seed down her throat.
Lauren suckled and licked him clean, and when she lifted up, she cried out her release, but then Eddie lowered her chest to Steve’s and he started licking her pussy and ass along with fingering her.
“Eddie. Oh God, Eddie.” She held on to Steve and then started kissing his neck as the SUV stopped moving. She was undoing his buttons and kissing lower, and he grabbed her hands, stopping her.
The door opened.
“Get her inside now and to the bedroom,” Panther ordered, but Steve stared at Lauren as the light inside the back seat illuminated his chest and the ugly, nasty scars he had. She pushed her hair behind her ears and ran her fingertip along one of the deep ones. He gripped her hips.
“I know they’re ugly. I can keep a shirt on.”
Tears rolled down her cheeks. He quickly sat up, holding her on his lap as he cupped her cheeks.
“No, no, no, no, don’t be scared of me and turned off.”
She shook her head. “I’m not. I…how?”
He pressed his lips to hers and kissed her then slid from the truck, holding her in his arms. She was straddling his waist, her ass fully exposed as he carried her into their home. He headed right upstairs to the bedroom, his brothers in tow.
When he got her there, he set her feet down onto the rug. She held on to his shoulders and remained staring up at him.
He took a deep breath and felt way too much. His brothers came into the room and waited.
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She unbuttoned his shirt more. He gripped her wrists tight. She gasped.
“I don’t have to take my shirt off. I don’t want to ruin this moment, this first time making love.”
“I don’t want to ruin it either. I’m not perfect, Steve.”
He cupped her cheek and jaw. “Oh yes, you are. You’re so damn perfect, sexy, beautiful, both inside and out, that I don’t deserve to be here with you. To share you with the team. I don’t.”
She shook her head.
“It’s me who doesn’t deserve to be with men as perfect as you.
Men who are warriors, who have faced real danger and continue to do so. I’m so scared, Steve, for a lot of reasons.”
“Like what?” he asked.
She swallowed hard, and he could see her struggling. She looked at his chest and stroked her fingers over the scar. He tightened.
“Don’t, baby. It’s too much. They’re a constant reminder of one mission gone terribly wrong. Of how close I came to death, of not being here with you and my team.”
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