by Quinn Loftis
She was right, his incredible mate. She’d been through hell and back since meeting him, and yet she still amazed him with her ability to find the good in every situation. “Where do I go from here?” He didn’t know if he was asking her or himself. He didn’t have time to wait for an answer because there was another jolt of pain inside of him, and then the cord that had held him to his alpha’s was suddenly there again, only it wasn’t attached to his parents. It was thicker and had strands flowing from him in every direction. He followed the path of one of the cords and could feel the power in it. He recognized the magic as Decebel’s. One branched off of that one and went to Jen, and then an even smaller one flowed to Thia. Then he followed another and knew instantly that it was Costin and Sally, with Titus attached to her. Next was Sorin, and attached to his cord was Elle. There were countless bonds all leading to the main one, tethered in his soul, right next to his bond with his true mate.
“Fane?” Jacquelyn said softly. “I feel our bond, but I also feel a whole hell of a lot more than just ours.” She paused and he felt realization hit her. “I think you just got your answer about where you go from here. Prince of the Romania wolves. Your father has passed his crown to you. You’re the new alpha.”
Decebel knew before he’d collapsed what had happened. He knew the second he felt the connection to Vasile and Alina vanish. His friend, a father figure, and alpha was gone, along with his remarkable mate. He’d only recently agreed to return to the beta position and unite the Romania and Serbia packs. But even when he’d been alpha of his own pack, he’d always looked to Vasile for advice and wisdom. He trusted the man more than any other person besides his Jennifer. He trusted Vasile more than he trusted himself. The only thing worse than losing Vasile and Alina was when he’d thought he’d lost his mate. Even the loss of his sister, though devastating, hadn't felt like this.
“Dec, I feel like my insides have just been ripped out of me.” Jen’s voice filled his mind. “Does this mean what I think it means?”
“Vasile and Alina have fallen.” He confirmed the thoughts he could hear through their bond.
“Fane and Jacque,” she immediately cried, even though he knew her own heart was breaking because she absolutely adored the alpha pair. But her first thought was for her best friend and the son who’d just lost his parents. No matter how callous Jen might come across, her love was fierce for those she claimed.
“Fane is here beside me,” Decebel reassured her. He let her see Jacque’s mate through his eyes. Fane was resting on his knees, bent at the waist until his forehead rested against the floor and his hands fisted on either side of his head. His shoulders were shaking, his breath ragged, but he appeared to be holding himself together.
“And you?” Jen asked him gently. Decebel could feel the tears in her voice.
“I wish you and Thia were here so I could hold you.” He didn’t let the tears that he could feel gathering in his eyes fall. No matter the pain he was feeling over the loss, it was a hundred times worse for Fane. Decebel needed to be strong for the younger male.
“We’ll be back together soon.” Something in her voice made him pause, as if she knew something he didn’t.
“Jennifer,” he warned, “do not put yourself at risk.” He didn’t bother to say not to put Thia at risk because he didn’t want to be mentally kicked in the balls. His mate would never, ever put their daughter at risk.
“The Order has taken our children captive, and now they’ve killed our alphas, which means they hurt you and hurt my best friends. Nobody hurts you. Nobody hurts my girls. Nobody hurts our pack and gets to live. Once Thia is safe, I don’t care if I have to steal a damn tank and massive amounts of guns from some shady Mexican cartel. I will bring the Order to the damn ground and then shove them through it into hell where they belong.”
Decebel almost smiled. Almost. But the pain of their loss—the pack's loss—was just too much, even for his mate’s wrath, which generally bordered on psychopathic. His attention was immediately drawn back to her when he heard her gasp. A second later, he knew why. He felt the cord that had been attached to Vasile and Alina snap back into place, but now, they were attached to Fane and Jacque, the new alpha pair of the Romania wolves. This time, Decebel’s lips did smile. “Good choice, Vasile,” he whispered.
“You were beta,” Jen said, having no doubt heard his thoughts.
“But Fane is Vasile’s heir, and he’s of age to lead. If that was Vasile’s will, then upon his death, it would naturally pass onto Fane, not Vasile’s beta, no matter who it was,” Decebel explained.
“You’re not upset?”
“No,” he said truthfully. “I would never begrudge Fane his rightful place in our pack. I have no doubt he will be every bit the leader his father was, or surpass him. And if he will have me as his beta, I will proudly serve under him as I did with Vasile.”
“I can feel their pain,” Jen said, sounding confused. “I never felt Alina and Vasile’s emotions.”
Decebel considered her revelation for a moment and then said, though he wasn’t completely sure of his answer, “You had a bond with Jacque long before now. It’s a soul bond, even if you didn’t realize it. The supernatural part of you two joined. You have it with Sally, too. It makes sense as to why you guys seem to feel so deeply for each other. Your bond now with her being the alpha female, on top of the friendship bond, might mean that everything is magnified for you.”
Jen seemed to be rolling the information around in her mind. While he listened to her thoughts through their bond, he could feel her own pain growing because she was feeling Jacque’s pain, and it was amplifying her own.
“It’s awful, Dec. What Fane is going through, it’s absolutely devastating,” she whispered.
“We will get them through it,” he assured her. “That’s what pack does.”
“Are you going to be okay?”
“I’ll be better when I have you and Thia back. I’m holding it together because I have no other choice. Being away from you two is killing me. Now with Vasile and Alina, it’s a punch to the gut.”
“By an elephant,” she added.
“Yes. But this won’t defeat us.”
“I love you, B,” Jen said. He could feel the passion and force behind her words.
“I love you, baby. Always.”
Holding a sleeping Thia in her arms, Jen slid down the wall until she was sitting on the floor of the room where they’d been confined. She could feel her mate’s pain, though he kept it locked down tight. Her own control wasn’t quite so good. Tears fell down her cheeks. Their bond was open, but she’d muted it because she wanted Decebel to focus on ensuring Fane didn’t lose his shit. He sort of had a history of doing that.
She pressed her face into Thia’s small neck and took a deep breath. Usually, the scent of her daughter was enough to help Jen get her emotions under control, but it didn’t work this time. This time, the pain was just too much. The shock of losing the heart of their pack wasn’t going to go away.
“How can we do this without you?” Jen asked the empty room, though she was speaking to Alina. The alpha female had become a surrogate mother to her. Jen had never had that great of a relationship with her own mom. Her mom wasn’t a bad mother. She was just different from Jen. She didn’t understand the way Jen thought. But Alina seemed to get her, just like she got Jacque and Sally. She just took them into the pack and they were hers, no hesitation or reservations.
Jen shuddered as memories of the alpha pair filled her mind. How many times had Vasile put up with her bad puns and ridiculous monologues, only to smile and shake his head? That man had the patience of a saint. She remembered back to The Gathering when Vasile had tried to prepare them for what to expect.
“Okay, so the moral of the story is to find a mate, don’t panic, and try to avoid any male pissing contests … literally,” she’d said.
“That sounds about right,” Vasile nodded. “I think you should just go about the rest of your day as usual. Tr
y not to worry about The Gathering.”
“Yeah, I’ll get right on that.”
She shook her head and smiled at the memory. Vasile had always just rolled with her. She couldn’t help but quietly laugh as she remembered when she tried to leave Romania. Vasile had been so accommodating, all the while planning on how to keep her there. He’d never come out and said it, but he’d known that she and Decebel belonged together. “You were a sly one, V, I’ll give you that,” she whispered, trying not to wake her daughter.
Then her thoughts shifted to Alina. How many times had Alina been strong for her, Jacque, and Sally?
From the moment Jen had met her, Alina had taught them and helped them transition into the reality of the supernatural world. She’d never once belittled them or made them feel stupid because of their ignorance. She’d just loved them because that’s what Alina did: she loved. If it hadn’t been for Alina, Jen probably would have run the other direction the moment she realized that Decebel was the one for her. Another conversation filled her mind.
“What does the girl get out of it? I mean, that sounds great for him, but what about the hole in her soul?”
Jen choked back a sob as she remembered Alina walking over to her and raising her chin so that Jen had to look her in the eyes.
“She gets a man who will love her completely and faithfully. She gets a man who will not only save her life but lay down his own to keep her safe. He will provide for her no matter the cost. He will shelter her against all the storms that come their way. He will be the one to bring a smile to her face when no one else can. She gets a friend, a lover, and a mate. The only man in this world who can complete her and give her the other half of her soul.”
Those words had been written on her heart, and she knew one day she would repeat them to her daughter. In fact, she knew that Alina had imparted a lot of wisdom to her that she would teach Thia. “I just wish it could be you, Alina,” she whispered. “You’re the one with the ability to be gentle and firm at the same time. I’m just a damn bull in a china shop with my opinions and outrageous statements.” She sucked in a shuddering breath. “Dammit, Alina. This wasn’t supposed to happen.”
Jen leaned her head back against the wall, her daughter sleeping blissfully, and let herself weep. Her heart split wide open for the pack’s loss … for her loss.
Sally gasped at the same time Costin’s arm tightened around her. She was seized by a knife-like pain. She knew through the bond that Costin felt the same thing.
Titus’s head slowly turned toward her. She saw the sheen of tears building in his eyes. “Papa Vasile and Grandma Alina are with the angel now.”
He was so intuitive and keen, which was a blessing but also a curse.
Sally opened her arms to him, and he crawled over from where he’d been sitting and climbed up into her lap. She wrapped both arms around him and pulled him tightly against her, as if somehow she could shelter him from the pain of this loss.
Costin buried his face in Sally’s hair, and she felt the wet drops of his tears on her neck. There were no words that could be said at that moment to offer comfort. A massive chasm had been torn open inside of them where the alpha pair had once been. Life would never be the same again. Their world, in the blink of an eye, had been completely turned upside down. The ground had dropped out from beneath them, and she couldn’t catch her breath.
Vasile was a bold male who led with a steadfastness that often left Sally in awe. She remembered the night she’d questioned his decision not to tell them about the vampires killing children. She’d seen the weight of that responsibility, but he had not crumbled beneath it. Instead, he’d done what an alpha does. He’d respectfully reminded her of why he had to make the hard choices.
“And what you feel is best is always right?” Sally asked.
“No, I am not always right. But that doesn’t change the fact that decisions must be made. This is not a democracy. A wolf pack would not survive if it were. This is a dictatorship. I am alpha. I am the strongest, and those I care about will submit—period. I make decisions that I think are best for everyone. I listened to wise counsel, but ultimately the choice is mine, and the consequences are mine as well. I realize that it is still difficult for you girls to understand. In the Canis lupus world, there has to be one leader and many followers. Otherwise, there would be utter chaos. The health of the pack is paramount. You may not like it, but you will accept it.”
“I get it,” Sally said. “But it doesn’t make it any easier.”
“I never claimed it would be easy,” Vasile said calmly. “Vent to your mate. Drink hot chocolate with your females, and think of all the ways you’d like to injure me because of your irritation. Ultimately, though, just like the males in the pack, you must obey.”
Sally let the memory fade, but she realized she finally understood what Vasile had been telling her that night. He’d known it would be hard for the girls to accept their place in the pack, but he loved them, all of them, and he’d proven that over and over by making the hard choices and dealing with their consequences. He was a man of worth, and he’d been an amazing alpha.
And Alina was the other half of his soul who had complimented his strengths and weaknesses perfectly. Two people who had come to mean the world to Sally. Just gone. From one breath to the next. It almost made her want to hold her own breath because breathing seemed to make it worse. It was unfair that she continued to draw breath, and yet they were gone. Even as she thought this, her heart broke all over again as she realized the pain Fane must be enduring.
“Fane,” she whispered. No matter the pain that the pack was feeling, it wouldn’t hold a candle to the pain he was going through, and he didn't even have his mate and son to help comfort him.
She hurt for Jacque because she was stuck in one of these damn rooms, holding her son and feeling the loss of her in-laws as well as the pain of her mate. How much more could they take?
A moment later, she felt another searing spasm in her chest, but this time it wasn’t an emptiness that was left behind, but rather, a connection. The pack cord that had connected her to Vasile and Alina was no longer severed. It was now attached to another tether, braided together and pulsing with power.
Costin chuckled gruffly. “And so the prince takes the crown.”
“Fane is alpha?” she asked, hearing the surprise in her voice. “But Decebel was beta.”
“Fane is Vasile’s heir. It is as it should be,” Costin answered.
“Can he do it?” Sally’s lips tightened as she continued. “He’s been knocked down so much, even before this blow.”
“It isn’t the number of times we’re knocked down that matters, Sally mine,” Costin said gently. “It is the number of times we get back up. The fact that the pack bonds have attached to Fane, distinguishing him as alpha, is a testament that he is already beginning to rise despite this blow.”
“He won’t be alone,” Titus said quietly, his voice still shaking. “That’s what pack is for, Mommy. The angel said pack holds those up who cannot stand, and they hold them until they can support themselves.”
“You’re right,” Costin said as he looked down at their son. “Alpha Fane will not fail because he has all of us to help him.”
“Even me?” Titus asked.
“Especially you.” Costin smiled as tears filled his eyes. “You are the next generation. You, Thia, and Slate. The current generation might lead our pack, but it is the next generation that will carry on what we have started.”
Titus’s eyes widened a bit, and Sally just knew that he was about to say something a four-year-old shouldn’t understand.
“I guess that means you guys better start something good,” the child said sternly.
Sally nodded. “We are, sweet boy. We are starting something good. Because we won’t let Vasile and Alina’s deaths be for not.”
Jacque shook so badly that she worried she was going to drop Slate. She paced, unable to sit still because she knew the minute she sat dow
n, she would lose the little bit of calm to which she clung.
Vasile and Alina, her alphas, the parents of the other half of her soul, were dead. The pain of them being torn away from the pack bonds had been rough, but it had been nothing compared to the anguish she’d felt through the mate bond. It was like a part of Fane had died, and she could feel that part slipping away.
He needed her, and yet all she could give him were mere words. Hell, she needed him, too, but she wasn’t about to let him know just how close to the edge of falling apart she’d come.
The door to her room suddenly opened, and two males walked in. She could smell that they were wolves. They’d brought food, just like they always did three times a day, and asked if she needed anything for the child.
Jacque was too screwed up in the head to do anything more than grunt at them. Her heart was shattering, and her arms were shaking so badly that she realized she needed to lay Slate down before she dropped him.
When the door closed, she took a blanket and wrapped it around her son. He started to fuss, but she bounced him gently on her shoulder and hummed the lullaby that Alina had always sung to him. He calmed and thankfully fell asleep. Jacque laid him in the bassinet, careful not to jostle him.
As soon as he was out of her arms, she walked over to the wall and lifted her hands, pressing them against the smooth surface. Jacque turned her head, pressed her mouth into her shoulder, and screamed. Her gut clenched so tightly she thought she might vomit. One hand clenched into a fist, and she pounded it against the wall as tears streamed down her face. When her air ran out, she sucked in more and screamed again and again until her throat was raw.