The next day, I sketched a portrait of Fuyuko. I sketched in those red lips. I thought about her all night before. I could not forget. Fuyuko would not have sex with Karasumori that night. She told him that she felt overwhelmed by her first impressions here. She asked Karasumori if he didn’t feel the same, but he said nothing. She said she felt totally committed to Kantaro from the first moment. She removed all her clothing and slept naked, covered only slightly by her sheet. Karasumori masturbated, and so did I.
Kōno is still here with his big forehead after a week. He can’t make up his mind to leave and go to Campinas, where he is supposed to have a contract and a good job with a lot of money. In the meantime, he follows Befu around looking at the chickens. All day long, they are discussing chickens. Kōno is like my old man, eating and sleeping with chickens.
Hatomura, the moon-faced one, came to talk to me. He asked about Shiratori. I told him what Kantaro says, that Shiratori had no vision. What else is there to say? Hatomura asked me what I meant by that. I told him that Shiratori wasn’t able to kill Kantaro. Hatomura didn’t understand. I told him it was too bad Shiratori had to leave. Then Hatomura asked me, just like Shiratori, why I didn’t go out to the field like everyone else. Why wasn’t I out there sweating in the hot sun? The others need something to do, I said. I never liked weeding anyway. Didn’t he know I was a genius? The next day, Hatomura went out with everyone to harvest corn. He came back with his moon face soiled and red from the sun. Even Kōno, who hasn’t any artistic talent, hasn’t gone out to work in the fields.
Then, in the evening, Fuyuko put a record on the phonograph. She called the music “jazz,” and the dance that she danced “modern ballet.” She wore this black suit which stretches over her body. I watched every part of her body move. Her buttocks are round tight muscles. Her legs are well molded, and she can stretch them open completely, pushing her toes into a point. She made her body slide and wiggle all over the floor. Her straight black hair flew about her face and got pasted to her by her sweat. Karasumori looked on with no expression, just blowing those smoke rings. I felt like doing it right there. Afterward, she sat around as if nothing had happened. No one of us here had ever seen such “modern ballet,” but Fuyuko didn’t seem to care. That night, Karasumori and I both masturbated again.
Finallly, Kōno decided he must leave. So he was supposed to leave today. But then, last night, Karasumori brought out a bottle of whiskey. He sucked his cigarette smoke through the spaces in his brown teeth and smiled. He said he was saving this bottle to celebrate Kōno’s last night. So they sat around with Kantaro and my old man and some of the others and passed around this bottle and started talking about Kantaro and the past and Esperança and the future. Pretty soon, Kōno is getting rather drunk and confused, and his big ears get very red. Kantaro is saying things like “This is not a calling for just an ordinary man,” and “This is not a question of money—it is a question of spirit, of courage, of true vision.”
All this makes Kōno very confused, and he drinks more and sweats and runs his fingers through his hair beyond his big forehead.
Kantaro goes on, saying, “Befu and I and these others made a pact among ourselves many years ago to create a new life, a new civilization. This is no dream. It is real. You see it for yourself. This is thirty-seven years of history. Once you leave, you will no longer be a part of this. But we will go on.”
Then someone else says, “Kōno, you belong here. You know you can make a difference. You cannot abandon your ideals.”
Someone else nods, “You will be abandoning your ideals when you step on that bus tomorrow and leave Esperança.”
This drives Kōno crazy, like he has a great itch that he cannot scratch. He looks like a little boy. Suddenly, he breaks down and cries and says, “Yes. Yes. You are all right. I belong here. I will stay. I will stay.”
Kantaro breaks down and cries too; he had put great effort into convincing Kōno.
I thought that Kōno will now have to stay, that he will never leave. But Karasumori makes smoke rings and says Kōno can leave any time he wants. I didn’t understand this, but now you see that Kōno’s mother sends him packages every week from Japan. This week she sent dried codfish and tea from Kyoto. Last week, it was a shirt and two cans of seaweed. They say all this is very fine expensive stuff. Karasumori makes fun of Kōno. “A young brat,” he calls him. He says if Kōno’s mother stops sending packages, Kōno will rush home to Japan. He says Kōno comes from a wealthy family, while he and the screenwriter Hatomura are poor starving artists. And they’re too old now. They have no choice; they can’t abandon their ideals.
I thought about Shiratori, who left with only his clothing and some of his dark canvasses. He couldn’t go back to Japan. Where did he go and how could he live after he left Kantaro’s? And now, there is this talk that I should leave. Only Hatomura says I should stay and work.
Hatomura started teaching school like Shiratori had because he talked with youth who said they missed Shiratori’s classes. They say the little kids get Kimi’s reading and writing class, but there must be something more. Kantaro says Brazilian school is only good for basic Portuguese. After grammar school, they have to quit. Jiro’s daughter Yae, for example, liked Brazilian school. She wanted to go to the next grade, but Kantaro said no. Yae was only ten or eleven then. She cried. Now Yae is going every day to Hatomura’s class.
Hatomura goes out and works in the field, then comes back and teaches. He teaches everything. You can see his serious moon face talking and reading. Every now and then I sit in his class. Yesterday, it was something about the American Revolution and democracy. Tsuneo, Jiro’s son, wanted to know everything. He kept asking questions about this thing called democracy, and Hatomura answered everything. It got too complicated, so I left.
Karasumori doesn’t like Hatomura. Hatomura doesn’t seem to notice this and said something about Fuyuko’s dancing. Hatomura pointed at my work and said I had captured her dance very well, better than he imagined I could. Well, Karasumori does not like me either, but since Hatomura said that, Karasumori doesn’t give me his cigarette butt to finish off anymore. He used to give them to me and then tell me to get lost.
Befu showed Karasumori the pictures I did of Kantaro. He didn’t say anything; he just looked and blew smoke through his teeth. He didn’t tell Befu, but I heard him say to Fuyuko that I was just an ordinary boy who had some technique. He told my old man to send me away to learn about life.
Karasumori told Kantaro that an artist must suffer to create, and that I would not progress with my art if I stayed here. Karasumori told Kantaro that I had to learn the new trends in art. He said my art was old-fashioned. Kantaro agreed and told Befu that I must leave.
I heard my old man talking with my mother Ritsu. He told her I had to go way. She asked why, and he said because I had to learn about life and new trends in art. My mother started to cry. She said I was too young, even though I am over twenty. She said the other boys didn’t have to leave like this. My father said that Kantaro had decided, and he agreed with Kantaro. My mother said I was her only child, and she didn’t want me to go so far away. She said none of the other children like me because I’m a genius. She said I was lonely here, but at least I was protected. Away from Kantaro’s place what would happen to me? She sobbed. My father told her that Kantaro had decided. Then, he pulled her down and made her do it there on the floor. After that, we all forgot that I had to leave.
Haru sent her daughter Hanako to clean Hatomura’s room and wash his dirty clothing. Hanako was doing this every day, following him around like a maid. Hanako hung around Hatomura’s room so much that there was some gossip about the two. But Hatomura never had anything to do with Hanako other than letting her wash his clothes and that sort of thing. Hatomura always spends the night with a lamp, writing something he calls a script, and then goes to bed and snores loudly. When nothing came of this, Haru got fed up and sent Hanako to clean Kōno’s room.
Fuyuko decided t
hat because Hatomura is teaching, she would teach the dancing she does. Fuyuko told Kantaro her plans, and Kantaro ordered all the girls to dance. The girls feel shy about this dancing, especially since they saw Fuyuko dance in those black things and crawl around the floor. But since Kantaro said they had to dance, they all went, except Jiro’s daughter Yae. Fuyuko complained to Kantaro that Yae wouldn’t dance. Then Kantaro made Yae go. This made Yae mad. I heard Yae say that she wasn’t taking orders from Fuyuko, who is younger than she is.
Yae is living with Kanzo. Everyone knows this. Someone said they are cousins and can’t get married. Anyway, Kantaro doesn’t like Yae, who never listens to anyone and always says what she wants. Haru does this too, but Kantaro still doesn’t like Yae. Yae even told Kanzo that he has to start standing up to Kantaro. After all, Kanzo is Kantaro’s son. Ever since Kanzo got beat up for standing up to Kantaro, he never says anything. This was a long time ago. Yae is too young to remember this.
I saw Fuyuko dancing by herself. She was making her body squirm all over the floor like a worm. When Fuyuko saw me watching her, she got mad. Later she told Kantaro that she also thought it was time I leave.
Hatomura doesn’t eat next to Kantaro at lunch or dinner anymore. For a while, he sat every day at the head of the long table next to Kantaro, asking him questions about our history. Kantaro told him everything because he wants Hatomura to make a movie. But Hatomura kept wanting to know something over and over, and Kantaro only wanted to tell it one way, even though Hatomura has heard different things from different people. Kantaro got tired of telling Hatomura the same things. First Hatomura sat next to Kantaro, then he began to sit next to my old man. Then he moved down the bench and sat next to someone else until he was way down at the end of the table. You could see Kantaro looking way down the long table, looking for Hatomura’s round face. Maybe he was asking everyone questions about our history, but he was really just getting farther and farther away from Kantaro. Now Hatomura moved even farther away to another table in the back. He sits with the youth, talking and laughing. You can see Kantaro look in his direction every now and then, to see where Hatomura is sitting now. It was the same with Shiratori. Pretty soon, Hatomura will not be sitting anywhere.
At night, Hatomura studies some volumes he brought from Japan. Then he goes to Mizuoka’s and borrows volumes from Mizuoka’s encyclopedia and teaches something every day. Now he is on Volume 4. It will be a miracle if he gets to 30.
Tsuneo is the oldest of the youth, and he is the leader now. Tsuneo looks like his father Jiro, but he is nothing like Jiro in any other way. Tsuneo walks first. He talks first. In Hatomura’s class, he thinks first. I don’t know how Jiro’s kids turned out like this. Kanzo on the other hand is weak. Tsuneo decided to talk to Kantaro about what he thinks. Kantaro doesn’t have anything to do but talk, so he agreed. Kantaro likes to talk about his ideas. Tsuneo wanted to know why Kantaro won’t let the youth leave to go on to Brazilian high school and maybe even to college. Kantaro said he had plans for a university in Esperança. Tsuneo asked about the ones who want to study now. He asked how long must they wait. Kantaro answered that that is a question of our history. The talking went like that. Tsuneo would ask questions, and Kantaro would answer. Tsuneo was very serious and did not give up asking questions and thinking about Kantaro’s answers. Kantaro nodded, raising his eyebrows and smiling every time Tsuneo came back with more questions. Kantaro said Tsuneo was very bright. He said he was proud of Tsuneo, but Tsuneo still did not get an answer. Kantaro said it was a question of our history.
Yae is also nothing like her father Jiro. This is a problem for Jiro. Kantaro is always pointing to Tsuneo and Yae and asking Jiro why he can’t control them. Kantaro says Tsuneo is bright, but Yae is spoiled. Yae needs to dance for her own good. Yae went to tell Hatomura that she hates to dance. She told Hatomura that she hates Fuyuko. She said Fuyuko was egotistical and vain. Yae told Hatomura that she wanted to leave Kantaro’s place. She wants to learn to cook and sew. She said she couldn’t understand art. She said she hates art. “Genji paints, so why does everyone else have to do it? Let Genji paint,” she said. “Let Fuyuko dance.” Yae asked Hatomura if he didn’t think of leaving Kantaro’s too.
Hatomura said he would have to leave eventually because it is too easy here. He could not be creative here. He could not write. He is losing his need to write. Nothing changes. Every day, it is the same. Everybody seems happy. Nobody needs change. Nobody needs creativity. He understood how Yae needed change. He realized that she would leave.
Yae asked if Hatomura would take her with him when he left. He didn’t say anything. Maybe he didn’t hear. He was thinking. He said maybe he was trying to justify his failure. Maybe he was not good enough. He was confused. He thought art and life was an ideal, but you could not force anyone to do it. “Yae, to tell you the truth, I have never been so happy as I am here. I love the youth here. Still, I can’t explain it, but I’m not satisfied.” He could not be creative. So he would have to leave.
Then Yae argued with Kanzo. “When Hatomura leaves, we will go with him,” she said.
Kanzo was silent.
“This is the only way to have a future,” she said.
Kanzo was not so sure. He shook his head.
“What are you worried about?” she asked.
“What will I do out there?” he asked. “It’s not as easy as you say. Hatomura can go back to Japan. He speaks and reads Japanese. We can’t even read Portuguese. What will we do?”
“We will learn,” insisted Yae.
“We don’t have any money. We will have nothing. I’m too old to start from nothing.”
“You are too old to be crying like this. You need to be a man. You can’t be a man if you stay here.”
“My father started this. I am a part of this history. If I go, it will be the end of everything. He will never allow it. What you are asking is impossible. Kantaro is still my father.”
“You need to be strong. You need to be your own man. Please promise you will leave with me.”
“Kantaro says that only the weak leave.”
“I am not weak,” Yae said.
Kanzo didn’t want to talk about it anymore. “No, you are not weak,” he agreed.
Kōno is sleeping with Hanako. Hanako was bustling around Kōno’s room changing sheets and that sort of thing. Kōno came in late. He had spent most of the night talking to my old man in the incubator barn. Kōno scratched his big forehead and asked Hanako what she was doing there so late. Hanako said she had been too busy to clean his room during the day. Before Kōno could say anything, Hanako pushed Kōno on the bed and started to press herself all over him. She is heavier and bigger than Kōno, so she overpowered him. That’s how it started. Now Kōno rushes away at night from the incubator barn. By the time he gets to his room, his penis is up. Hanako is always there, waiting to surprise him. One time she was waiting under the bed. She grabbed him by his legs and pulled him down, and they did it under the bed.
On the other hand, Hatomura isn’t sleeping with Akiko, but he wants to marry her. The youth like to talk with Hatomura. He always listens, and his moon face looks concerned. Akiko is getting old, but she goes to his classes anyway. At first, she wanted to talk to Hatomura about Shiratori. She had to talk to him in private, so they walked out to the mango groves to talk. Pretty soon, they were going out to the mango groves to talk all the time. Always talking. That’s all Hatomura does. He never touches her. He tells Akiko about some movie script he is writing. He explains that he was working on a monster movie in Japan, but this was not serious. He kept working to make money. Then he showed his serious work to the monster movie people, and they laughed. They were not serious. So he left. Now he has a plan to study the Japanese farmers in Brazil and make a film about them. He really doesn’t want to make a film about Kantaro; that’s just Kantaro’s idea. Hatomura explains everything to Akiko. He has some plan to research this film for three years and then return to Japan to get money to make t
his film. He will be leaving Kantaro’s place soon so that he can go on researching. Hatomura asked Akiko if she wouldn’t return to Japan with him. Here is another one asking Akiko to go here and there with him.
Hanako is getting even heavier and fatter. Of course, she is pregnant, but no one knows. Not even Kōno knew. Hanako told him last night. He was so shocked his ears turned red. That seemed strange to me because they have been rolling around every night for several months. Kōno spent a long time trying to figure out when it had happened and how long Hanako has been pregnant. “When did it happen? When? What are we going to do now?”
Hanako said he must marry her. This was even more shocking for Kōno. That also seemed strange to me because Kōno had said he wanted to stay at Kantaro’s. He didn’t seem so sure anymore. He talked the rest of the night about his mother and his family. He looked sad. Finally Hanako asked, “Aren’t you going to marry me?” He had the same confused look on his face when Karasumori passed around that whiskey. Hanako cried that she wasn’t going to let him go away, then she left the room.
For a while, Kantaro started to buy oil paints for me, so I was able to finish the one of Fuyuko pasted with her sweat to that black outfit. They must have told Kantaro to stop buying stuff for me. I have some paper left in this notebook, and that is all. Instead, Kantaro bought this granite rock for Karasumori. He also bought black stretchy suits for all the girls to dance their modern ballet and a second record player for Fuyuko to play her music.
Now all the men are building a dance stage. This was Fuyuko’s idea. Fuyuko and Akio Karasumori drew all the plans. The stage must be larger than the dining hall. Tsuneo was talking angrily with Hatomura. Tsuneo complained that the men were needed for planting. Kantaro ordered all the men to build the stage. The planting will have to wait, Kantaro said. Tsuneo has been reading and studying about increasing production, and he told Hatomura that soon it will be too late to plant. Tsuneo asked Hatomura why we needed a stage, why we needed art. Tsuneo said we could not eat the stage. We could not eat art. Then Tsuneo went to talk with Kantaro again. Tsuneo asked Kanzo to come with him to talk to Kantaro, but Kanzo said no. Kanzo went back to building the stage, and Tsuneo went to talk to Kantaro alone. Tsuneo asked questions, and Kantaro answered. But it was still a question of our history.
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