I had to admit—somewhat ruefully—that Oleg had done his homework about me, too. Why? Because he’d manufactured a scenario requiring exactly the sort of KISS operation I like to pull off. I mean, the kidnapping almost made perfect sense—the precise thing you want for one of these smoke-and-mirrors ops. And Oleg, being an operator, knew how to suck me in. He gave me the plot, he set the clock ticking, and then he let my Warrior instincts take over from there.
Well, I wasn’t the only one he’d fooled. He’d made Ashley believe his story, too. And Ashley was about as easy to convince as moi. But that was the genius of his op. I mean, it was conceivable that Steve Sarkesian might have actually kidnapped Marybeth Madison. But the more I thought about what had just happened, the more I understood that the trio of intercepts Oleg had showed me had all been fakes. The kind of dezinformatsia the Soviets used to call “Active Measures,” which is black information, made plausible by grains of truth planted within, and set into a believable context. Info land mines. The Sovs had been effective practitioners of dezinformatsia during the Cold War. And Oleg Lapinov hadn’t lost the talent more than a decade later.
Besides, my guys hadn’t found any explosives or the accoutrements thereof, in Steve’s effects, his bodyguards’ luggage—or anywhere in the hotel, or the hangar, for that matter. No. It was Oleg who’d wanted to blow Ambassador Madison’s chopper out of the sky, because by doing so, he could rid himself of two adversaries: Ambassador Madison, and me.
But only after he’d used me to kill his double agent.
There was a kind of warped genius to his plan—because he’d built it around my Roguish personality, and my tendency to operate UNODIR. Once my men and I were corpses, he could claim that I’d jumped the gun again, just as I had when I’d burgled Sarkesian’s office. He’d tell Washington I’d gone Rogue and killed Steve Sarkesian on my own, but fallen victim to Steve’s preplanned hit on Ambassador Madison.
And if the scenario played itself out true to form, the American oil companies would reassess the situation, and the United States would downsize its relationship to Baku. Which would leave Oleg the last man standing. And Moscow would once again roll across the border, shut out the Iranians, and dominate Azerbaijan—and the rest of the Caucasus, too.
Is that confusing enough for you? It was certainly confusing enough for me. In fact, God save me from geopolitics—and the practitioners thereof. I’m happiest waxing tangos, sucking down a few cold brewskis, sipping some Bombay Sapphire, and taking a long, long soak between warm thighs every now and then. And since I’d just had my fill of waxing tangos, the other three sounded pretty fuckin’ good.
1055. Time was getting tight. I looked over at Oleg’s corpse. He was proof that, despite what the old Azeri adage says, the enemy of your enemy ain’t always your friend. Well, I’d let the fucking Russians find him and puzzle things out for themselves. Me, I was gonna have a hell of a time explaining this little episode to the Chairman. But that would come later—after the brewskis, and the Bombay, and the long, long soak. I windmilled my right index finger, sending everyone toward the chopper. Oh yes, it was way past time to head for home.
GLOSSARY
A2: aforementioned asshole.
A3: Anytime, Anyplace, Anywhere.
Admirals’ Gestapo: what the secretary of defense’s office calls the Naval Investigative Services Command. See: SHIT-FOR-BRAINS.
AK-47: 7.63 × 39mm Kalashnikov automatic rifle. The most common assault weapon in the world.
APOC: A Piece Of Cake.
AVCNO: Assistant Vice Chief of Naval Operations.
Bandity: (Russian) Police slang for hoodlums.
BAW: Big Asshole Windbag.
BDUs: Battle Dress Uniforms. Now that’s an oxymoron.
BFD: Big Fuckin’ Deal.
BFH: Big Fuckin’ Help.
BIQ: Bitch-In-Question.
BJB: Leader of the Free World.
BOHICA: Bend Over—Here It Comes Again!
BTDT: Been There, Done That.
BUPERS: Naval BUreau of PERSonnel.
BUWEPS: Naval BUreau of WEaPonS.
C-130: Lockheed’s ubiquitous Hercules.
C-141: Lockheed’s ubiquitous StarLifter aircraft, soon to be mothballed.
C-4: plastic explosive. You can mold it like clay. You can even use it to light your fires. Just don’t stamp on it.
C2CO: Can’t Cunt Commanding Officer. Too many of these in Navy SpecWar today. They won’t support their men or take chances because they’re afraid it’ll ruin their chances for promotion.
CALOW: Coastal And Limited-Objective Warfare. Very fashionable acronym at the Pentagon in these days of increased low-intensity conflict.
cannon fodder: See FNG.
Christians in Action: SpecWar slang for the Central Intelligence Agency.
CINC: Commander-IN-Chief.
CINCUSNAVEUR: Commander IN Chief, U.S. Naval forces, EURope.
clusterfuck: See: FUBAR
CNO: Chief of Naval Operations.
cockbreath: SEAL term of endearment used for those who pay only lip service. See: SAP/BJ.
CONUS: CONtinental United States.
CQC: Close Quarters Combat—i.e., killing that’s up close and personal.
CT: CounterTerrorism.
DADT: Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.
DEA: Drug Enforcement Administration.
DEFCON: DEFense CONdition.
DEVGRP: Naval Special Warfare DEVelopment GRouP. Current U.S. Navy appellation for SEAL Team Six.
detasheet: olive-drab, ten-by-twenty-inch flexible PETN-based plastic explosive used as a cutting or breaching charge.
DIA: Defense Intelligence Agency. Spook heaven based in Arlington, Virginia, and Bolling Air Force Base.
Diplo-dink: no-load fudge-cutting, cookie-pushing diplomat.
DIPSEC: DIPlomatic SECurity. SEAL shorthand for the Diplomatic Security Service, the Department of State’s special agent shoot-and-looters.
Dipshit: can’t cunt numb-nutted pencil-dicked asshole.
DIQ (pronounced dik, except in France, where it’s pronounced deek): Document-In-Question. You can have sensitive DIQs, big, thick DIQs, or even tiny, penciled DIQs. But if you drop your DIQ into a puddle of water, you’ll end up with a limp DIQ.
Do-ma-nhieu (Vietnamese): Go fuck yourself. See: DOOM ON YOU.
doom on you: American version of Vietnamese phonetic for go fuck yourself.
dweeb: no-load shit-for-brains geeky asshole, usually shackled to a computer.
EC-130: Electronic warfare–outfitted C-130.
EEI: Essential Element of Information. The info-nuggets on which a mission is planned and executed.
EEO: Equal Employment Opportunity. (The Rogue Warrior® always treats ’em all alike—just like shit.)
ELINT: ELectronic INTelligence.
EOD: Explosive Ordnance Disposal.
flashbang: disorientation device used by hostage rescue teams.
FLFC: Fucking Loud and Fucking Clear.
FLIR: Forward Looking InfraRed.
FNG: Fucking New Guy. See: CANNON FODDER.
Four-striper: Captain. All too often, a C2CO.
frags: fragmentation grenades.
FUBAR: Fucked Up Beyond All Repair.
Glock: Reliable 9-mm pistols made by Glock in Austria. They’re great for SEALs because they don’t require as much care as Sig Sauers.
GNBN: Good News/Bad News.
goatfuck: What the Navy likes to do to the Rogue Warrior. See: FUBAR.
GSG-9: Grenzschutzgruppe-9. Top German CT unit.
HAHO: High-Altitude, High-Opening parachute jump.
HALO: High-Altitude, Low-Opening parachute jump.
HICs: Head-In-Cement syndrome. Condition common to high-ranking officers. Symptoms include pigheadedness and inability to change opinions when presented with new information.
HK: ultrareliable pistol, assault rifle, or submachine gun made by Heckler & Koch, a firm based in Oberndorf, Germany. SEALs use H&K MP5 s
ub-machine guns in various configurations, as well as P7 9-mm, and USP 9-mm, .40- or .45-caliber pistols.
HKTB: Hot Knife Through Butter.
HUMINT: HUMan INTelligence.
humongous: Marcinko dick.
Hydra-Shok: extremely lethal hollowpoint ammunition manufactured by Federal Cartridge Company.
IBS: Inflatable Boat, Small—the basic unit of SEAL transportation.
IED: Improvised Explosive Device.
Japs: bad guys.
Jarheads: Marines. The Corps. Formally, USMC (Uncle Sam’s Misguided Children).
JSOC: Joint Special Operations Command.
KATN: Kick Ass and Take Names. Roguish avocation.
KH: KeyHole. Designation for NRO’s spy-in-the-sky satellites, as in KH-12s.
KISS: Keep It Simple, Stupid. The basic premise for all special operations.
KTFM: Keep The Fuck Moving.
klik: One kilometer, equaling six-tenths of a mile.
Kuz emeq (Arabic): Roguespeak for “Up your mother’s cunt.”
LANTFLT: atLANTic FLeeT.
LBFM: Little Brown Fucking Machine.
LTWS: Lower Than Whale Shit.
M3: Massively motivated motherfuckers.
M-16: Basic U.S. .223-caliber weapon, used by the armed forces.
Mark-I Mod-0: basic unit.
MILCRAFT: Pentagonese for MILitary airCRAFT.
Mossad (Short form of Ha-Mossad hamerkazi Lemodi’in Vetafkidim Meychadim, or Central Institute for Intelligence and Special Tasks): Israeli spy service. Not as good as it used to be.
MOTI: Russian Ministry of the Interior.
NAVAIR: NAVy AIR Command.
NAVSEA: NAVy SEA Command.
NAVSPECWARGRU: NAVal SPECial WARfare GRoUp.
Navyspeak: redundant, bureaucratic naval nomenclature, either in written nonoral or nonwritten oral modes, indecipherable by nonmilitary (conventional) or military (unconventional) individuals during normal interfacing configuration conformations.
NILO: Naval Intelligence Liaison Officer.
NIS: Naval Investigative Service Command, also known as the Admirals’ Gestapo. See: SHIT-FOR-BRAINS.
NMN: No Middle Name.
NRO: National Reconnaissance Office. Established August 25, 1960, to administer and coordinate satellite development and operations for U.S. intelligence community. Very spooky place.
NSA: National Security Agency, known within the SpecWar community as No Such Agency.
NSD: National Security Directive.
NYL: Nubile Young Lovely.
OBE: Overtaken By Events—usually because of the bureaucracy.
OFACW: Only Fucking Asshole Carrying Wire cutters.
OOD: Officer Of the Deck (he who drives the big gray monster).
OPSEC: OPerational SECurity.
OSINT: Open Source INTelligence.
PDMP: Pretty Dangerous Motherfucking People.
PIC: Pissed, Irritated, and Confused.
PIQ: Pussy In Question.
POTUS: President Of The United States.
RDL: Real Dirty Look.
RIB: Rigid Inflatable Boat. SEALcraft used for clandestine insertions and extractions.
RPG: Rocket-Propelled Grenade.
RSO: Regional Security Officer. State Department’s diplomat with a gun.
R2D2: Ritualistic, Rehearsed, Disciplined Drills.
RUMINT: RUMor INTelligence. Urinal gossip. Generally, the information is of piss-poor quality.
S1: Square one.
S2: Sit the fuck down and shut the fuck up.
SADM: Special Atomic Demolition Device. Man-portable nuke.
SAP/BJ: Special Assistant to the President for Blow Jobs.
SAS: Special Air Service. Britain’s top CT unit.
SATCOM: SATellite COMmunication.
SCIF: Sensitive Compartmented Information Facility. A bug-proof room.
SEAL: U.S. Navy SEa-Air-Land SpecWarrior. A hop-and-popping shoot-and-looting hairy-assed Frogman who gives a shit. The acronym really stands for Sleep, Eat, And Live it up.
Semtex: Czechoslovakian C-4–type plastique explosive. Can be used to cancel Czechs.
SERE: Survival, Evasion, Resistance, and Escape school.
SES: Shit-Eating Smile.
shit-for-brains: any no-load, pus-nutted, pencil-dicked asshole.
SIGINT: SIGnals INTelligence.
SMG: SubMachine Gun
SNAFU: Situation Normal—All Fucked Up.
SNAILS: Slow, Nerdy Assholes In Ludicrous Shoes.
SOF: Special Operations Force.
SpecWarrior: One who gives a fuck.
SSN: nuclear attack sub, commonly known as sewer pipe.
SUC: Smart, Unpredictable, and Cunning.
SWAT: Special Weapons And Tactics police teams. All too often they do not train enough, and become SQUAT teams.
szeb (Arabic): dickhead.
TAD: Temporary Additional Duty (SEALs refer to it as Traveling Around Drunk).
Tailhook: the convention of weenie-waggers, gropesters, and pressed-ham-on-glass devotees that put air brakes on NAVAIR.
TARFU: Things Are Really Fucked Up.
TBW: Tired But Wired.
TECHINT: TECHnical INTelligence.
TFB: Too Fucking Bad.
THREATCON: THREAT CONdition.
Tigerstripes: The only stripes that SEALS will wear.
TIQ (pronounced tick and just as apt to bite you on the ass): Tango-In-Question.
TTS: Tap ’em, Tie ’em, and Stash ’em.
U2: Ugly and Unfamiliar.
UNODIR: UNless Otherwise DIRected. That’s how the Rogue operates when he’s surrounded by can’t cunts.
USSOCOM: United States Special Operations COMmand, located at MacDill Air Force Base, Tampa, Florida.
VDS: Very Direct Stare.
vor: Russkie godfather.
VTVE: Very Thorough Visual Exam.
wannabes: the misguided assholes you tend to meet at Soldier of Fortune conventions.
weenies: pussy-ass can’t cunts and no-loads.
Whiskey-Numbers: NSA’s 1999–2000 code word designator for highest priority intercepts.
WHUTA: Wild Hair Up The Ass.
WTF: What The Fuck.
ZULU: Universal time designator used in formal military communications. Formerly called Greenwich Mean Time (GMT).
INDEX
Abu Nidal, 322
Actions at Objective phase, 159n51
Afghanistan, 193, 234
Alex Boncayao Brigade, 108, 110
AMAN, 93–94
Amanpour, Christiane, 10
ambassadors, selection of, 86
ambush, 39, 41, 43, 58, 167n55
of Avi Ben Gal, 224–29
in killing of hostages, 77–85, 91, 104
American Embassy (Azerbaijan), 65, 67, 69, 99, 104, 223–24
Marcinko needed intel from, 152, 153–54
Marcinko persona non grata at, 151
RSO, 105
Sarkesian’s plan to attack, 317, 337
Amin, Idi, 321
Andropov, 309
Annan, Kofi, 153
Apsheronskiy peninsula, 117
ARAMCO pumping station, Al–Hufuf, Saudi Arabia, 317, 318
Arava (airplane), 327, 330, 324, 336, 339
Arleigh-gram, 47, 58
Armenia, 64, 111–12, 160, 301, covert strike in, 106
U.S. stance toward, 214
Armenian Mafiya, 193, 295
Armenian National Foundation, 161
Armenian nationalists, 291
Armenian separatists, 104
Armenians, 63, 98
Armstrong, Louis, 158
Astara, Iran, 15
CIA listening post, 92, 112, 231–36, 251–61, 262–79
Autonomous Karabakh, 295, 296, 301
Azerbaijan, 9–14, 65, 98, 293
covert strikes, 110
culture of, 74
ecological disaster zone, 96
Marcinko’s mission to, 61–66,
89, 167, 293
NGOs in, 184–86
oil, 97, 99, 101, 165
Russian involvement in, 63, 65, 98, 100, 153, 167, 381
Sirzhik Foundation program in, 161
U.S. stance toward, 214
Azeri Army, 15
Azeri Mafiya, 193
Azeri special forces, 106, 287–88, 301, 329
Kurbanov head of, 69
training, 10, 11, 69, 76, 105, 106, 110, 169
Azeris, 16, 63, 88, 301, 345
and ambush of hostages, 80–81
in hostage rescue, 68, 73, 75
Israelis and, 96
seized oil platform 16-Bravo, 9–10
Baku, Azerbaijan, 9–10, 75, 88, 117, 135, 145, 274, 299, 305, 336
car bomb attack on Ben Gal, 221, 222–29
CIA net rolled in, 98
Marcinko’s mission to, 61, 63, 64
oil barons, 173–74
oil companies in, 161
old city, 89
traffic, 123, 126
U.S. relationship to, 381
Baku Sport Jumping Club, 329
Balkans, 98
Barrett, Everett Emerson, 197, 198, 343
BDUs (Battle Dress Uniform), 5, 23, 283
Ben Gal, Avi, 93–104, 106, 111, 154–55, 160
car bomb attack on, 224–29, 273–74
order to kill, 290, 294
at Sirzhik Foundation reception, 190, 196
Ben Gal, Miriam (Mikki), 94, 95, 155, 190, 217
killed in car bomb ambush, 225–29, 284, 288, 290, 294
Benavidez, Roy, 247–50
BJB (Blow-Job Bill), 93, 92n29, 114
Boehm, Roy Henry, 140–41, 210–11, 378
credo of, 22
leadership, 250
Bolling Air Force Base, 113, 316
Boomerang, 91, 95, 156, 169, 285, 286–87, 354
and ambush of hostages, 80, 81, 84
and covert strikes 105, 106, 110, 156, 227, 231, 242, 244, 245, 247, 251, 259, 262, 264–65, 267–68, 269, 271, 272
in hostage rescue, 16–17, 18–19, 24, 28–30, 32–33, 34, 38, 41, 44–47, 51, 52, 57, 58
in mission to rescue Madison, 316, 325–26, 367, 369–70, 379
Bosnia, 66
Brendel, Bentley, 166
bribes, 163–64, 165
British surveillance unit, 119
BUD/S, 20, 326
bulletproof vests, 5, 35, 61, 247
Bush, George, 109
Büyükagri Dagi (Mount Ararat), 111
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