Worth It

by Nicki DeStasi

  I want to be that cake.

  He smirks again and shifts back to cut a piece for me, and then he holds out his hand, offering it to me.

  My turn.

  I lean forward and open my mouth. Instead of licking the fork, I swipe a bit of frosting with my finger and slowly rub it on my top lip. I lick it off even slower with my tongue. I feel a thrill run through me as I watch his eyes heat, and his nostrils flare. Seeing him turned-on by my behavior boosts my confidence and causes my sex to tighten deliciously. Emboldened, I reach up, clasp his hands, and run my flattened tongue on the underside of the fork before closing my mouth around it and pulling away gradually.

  He lets out a shaky breath and says gruffly, “That was so fucking hot.”

  Confidence swells in me again at my ability to have this sexy, amazing man want me. He wants me and only me. Somehow, I’m finally realizing that as a fact.

  He sweeps some frosting with his finger and grins mischievously. “My turn.”

  He tilts forward and smears the frosting from just below my ear down to my collarbone, sending a shiver through me. He pulls back just slightly, and I watch, captivated, as he places his finger into his mouth and sucks off the remaining frosting. He bends down, and I feel his hot, wet tongue flatten along my collarbone. He moves up slowly, oh-so slowly, until he reaches the end of the trail just below my earlobe. It feels so damn good that I shiver. I can feel my breast swell, and my breathing starts to come out in pants.

  He sucks my earlobe into his mouth and nibbles it lightly with his teeth. “Mmm, you and cake are the best dessert I’ve ever had,” he rumbles low in my ear.

  My insides tighten, and I feel my panties dampen. I really, really like this game. He leans back with a wide grin stretching across his face. After a moment, I recover and realize it’s my turn. Oh, this game is so on.

  “Take off your shirt,” I purr seductively. Well, I hope it’s seductive. This is so new to me, but it’s thrilling and invigorating. I love it.

  He grins even wider. “I will if you will.”

  I clutch the hem of my shirt, but now, I’m a little self-conscious about baring myself to him outside of the bedroom. We had the encounter one time on the couch, but this is different. In here, like this, I’m completely exposed in the light where he can see my every flaw, and it makes me feel…vulnerable.

  He raises an eyebrow in question, and before I can think about it more, I quickly pull my top off and toss it to the side. When my eyes find his, the sight of him drinking me in makes me feel sexy and wanted, and it stokes the fire that began to build when we started this game.

  “You’re so beautiful, Anna,” he murmurs quietly before closing his eyes and blowing out a ragged breath. Then, he reaches down, grabs the hem of his shirt, and pulls it off.

  Now, it’s my turn to drool. His tight abs and firm chest sprinkled lightly with dark hair is unbelievably manly and sexy. I have to stop myself from climbing on top of him and ending the torture. The shape of his broad shoulders and muscled arms make the fire inside me flare hotter.

  Barely containing the urge to end this game to relieve the throbbing burn of desire, I reach over to the cake and swipe the frosting with my finger. Getting down on my knees in front of him, I then trail the frosting just above the hem of his jeans from hip to hip. His abs tighten under my touch.

  Once I’ve finished making my own little happy trail, I peek up to see his chest rising and falling rapidly, and his eyes are blazing lustfully. I flick out my tongue to lick off the remaining frosting on my finger before wrapping my lips around it and sucking. He blows out an unstable breath as I remove my finger, and I grin before lowering my head. I suck and lick my way across the path on his lower stomach, pausing to nibble lightly here and there.

  The second I reach the end, he leans forward, grabs me under my arms, hauls me onto his lap, and thrusts his tongue into my mouth. His tongue moves against mine with passion as I straddle his lap, and I can feel the evidence of how much he enjoyed me teasing him. I’m light-headed and panting when he finally breaks free and looks up into my eyes, his chest heaving.

  “Anna…” He works to control himself. “That was hot, really fucking hot. There are no words for what you do to me.”

  His voice, low and raspy, causes another spasm in my sex.

  Then, he grins, and reaching behind me, he unclasps my bra and tosses it away. “My turn,” he whispers seductively.

  My breasts feel heavy and sensitive as he cups them both, and he lowers his head to suck a pebbled nipple into his mouth. I moan, and my head drops back as he continues his pleasurable assault.

  “Mmm, you like that?”

  “Yes,” I pant.

  “Good.” He reaches over to swipe some frosting, and then he turns back to me. He’s grinning as if he’s just won the lottery. “I don’t really know if this will be teasing you or me since I love sucking these perfect nipples so much,” he admits as he spreads the creamy frosting on one and then the other nipple.

  He moves his hand up and places the frosting-covered finger in front of my mouth. I immediately open and suck off the remaining frosting, using my tongue to roll around the tip. His mouth opens into an O-shape, and I can feel his erection jerk beneath me.

  When I finally release his finger, he dips his head to draw my sugarcoated nipple into his mouth. Sparks shoot straight to my core as he rolls his tongue around while he sucks and then nibbles. This is so erotic that I groan and involuntarily rub myself against him. He groans back and shifts upward, so his jean-clad length rubs me in just the right place. After the first nipple is clean, he stands us up, lays us on the floor, and moves to my other breast as he continues to rub himself against me. I feel like I’m flying, having both of my most sensitive places stimulated. It feels carnal and passionate, sensual and loving. I’ve never been so wet and wanting. When the other nipple is clean, he sits up and starts to unbutton my jeans.

  My brow furrows. “Isn’t it my turn?”

  “You can have another turn after I watch you come. I need to see that right now, Anna. Is that okay?”

  I shiver as lightning streaks straight through me, and I almost come on the spot, so I just nod.

  He peels off my jeans and quickly follows suit with my panties. Then, he stretches out over me, and resting on his forearm, he uses the other to explore my body. His eyes follow his hand as he gently smooths his palm up my arm, over my shoulder, and to my collarbone. He unhurriedly traces the valley between my breasts before moving down my stomach and over my hip. Then, he slows his pace even more when he approaches the place where I want his fingers the most. The anticipation is such sweet torture.

  He looks back at me, and our eyes lock. He brushes his longest finger along my clit, and I jerk. I’m burning with lust, and I’m panting so much that it would be embarrassing if he wasn’t so enraptured by my response to his touch. His finger dips lower, and with a deliberate slowness, he eases into my entrance, drawing a groan of pleasure from me.

  He keeps his eyes locked with mine as he whispers, “So wet. God, so wet and hot.”

  He spreads my moisture around. Occasionally, he brushes my clit, each time provoking me to jump. The fire within me is roaring, and I’m so wound up that I think I might burst.

  “Please,” I whimper. “Please.”

  He returns his finger to dip within me once again, and this time, he adds another. He begins moving them in and out at a steady pace. I feel my orgasm building and building. When his thumb rubs my clit, the building climbs higher and higher, faster and faster. My legs stiffen, and I close my eyes as the wave crashes over me. I shatter into a thousand little stars as I cry out his name. When I come down from my high, I slowly open my eyes to see him watching me with a heated expression.

  “That has to be one of the sexiest things I’ve ever witnessed,” he says.

  I smile and duck my head, both embarrassed and warmed by his compliment.

  “My turn.” I roll him over and start to unbutton his pa
nts and pull down the zipper.

  He helps me remove his jeans and then his boxer briefs. I can’t help it. The sight of him so hard and throbbing has me licking my lips. I dip my head and begin to kiss up his leg, over his hip, and across his stomach. My breasts brush his length, drawing a shudder out of him. I reach out and grasp him in my fist.

  Just before I open my mouth to lick that bead of saltiness off him, he stops me.

  “Anna, I wanted tonight to be about you. You don’t have to do that.”

  Confused, I frown. Me? Why would it be about me? I think about it for a brief second before it dawns on me.

  He’s giving me a gift—confidence.

  I feel more confident in what we’re doing than I ever have before. He’s also giving me true desire. Sex has either been taken, or I’ve used it to get some sort of connection. But tonight, I’ve just gone with the flow of what feels good, what feels right. I think about all the times with him before this, and from day one, he’s given that to me, but tonight, he’s placed it in front of me on a silver platter.

  I want to lick him though. Not as a prequel to intimacy, but because I want to. The thought of him in my mouth and under my tongue is sexy and erotic, so I lean forward without responding to him. I lick the very tip, eliciting a shudder from him that spurs me on. I swirl my tongue around his head before I take him in my mouth, and then I lower my head as far as I can on his thick shaft.

  “Oh shit,” he groans.

  When I feel him hit the back of my throat, I wrap my hand around the remaining length and apply pressure with my lips. I slowly withdraw, producing another groan from him, and I squeeze my thighs together. My body throbs, knowing how hard and hot I’m making him. I continue working my mouth up and down, using my hand to aid me. I start working him a little faster, spurred on by his pants and moans.

  “Oh, oh God, Anna.”

  I feel his head swell and heat in anticipation of his release, but he sits up quickly, pulling me away from him.

  “I’m not ready to come yet. I need to be inside you when that happens.”

  My sex clenches, and heat flares though me.

  “But first, I need to taste you.”

  God, is there such a thing as a word orgasm?

  He lays me down and kisses my lips softly before gently, reverently kissing, licking, and nipping down my body until he finally settles between my legs. I close my eyes as I feel his mouth leisurely taste my sensitive, swollen flesh. His lips and tongue take a similar path as his fingers did earlier. He’s slow and gentle. I’m smoldering and gasping, and fuck, this feels so good. His pace begins to quicken as he adds a finger to plunge inside me, and then he adds another. Oh shit, I’m gonna come again. I tense as the frenzied ecstasy climbs higher and higher until it hits me, and I call out his name as I let go.

  I let out a whimper as he withdraws. He grabs my hands to lift me up. He lies down, and then I’m straddling him. I’ve never been on top before, and I feel a little uneasy.

  He grabs a condom from his jeans and slips it on before he positions himself and looks at me. “Ride me, baby.”

  I bite my lip nervously. “I’ve never done that.”

  A look of irritation flashes through his eyes so fast that I’m not sure if it was actually there.

  He says, “Well, I’m glad that you get to do it with me. Slide down, and I’ll help you.”

  I slowly slide down him, and my mouth pops open in a silent, Oh, as I feel him deliciously fill me up. It’s deeper this way, and I love it.

  “Take my hands, baby.”

  I do as he says.

  “Now, move up and down, however you want.”

  I move up and feel that wonderful friction of him moving inside me, and then I lower myself down.

  Shit, this feels so good and empowering.

  I do the slow movement again, and I look at his face to see he’s enjoying this as much as I am. I repeat the movement again and again and again as I begin to pick up the pace.

  “That’s right, Anna. Fuck, that feels good.”

  He lets go of my hands to place his on my hips, and I put my palms on his muscular chest to brace myself.

  Oh, this new angle feels fantastic.

  I pick up the pace more. His hands are steadying me but letting me set the rhythm. My insides start to build, and my muscles tighten.

  “Keep going, baby. I’m close, too, Anna. That’s it,” he chants hoarsely.

  “Oh God, Jed. You feel so good.”

  I’m losing any inhibitions I had left as the feeling building within me starts to take over. I drop down on him faster and harder until I reach that pinnacle. Slamming down hard, I fall over the cliff and explode into oblivion. I vaguely hear him follow me, moaning my name.

  We lay there for a while. I’m splayed across his chest while he strokes my hair softly as we’re catching our breaths and slowing our racing hearts. I’ve never felt so good after sex. I feel so sated, so content, so…safe. He gave that to me. I know from his “tonight is about you” statement that the gift was deliberate, but he can’t fathom the depth of it. Sex with anyone else has always been a desperate way to gain affection and gain the feeling of being loved. But this—this was freeing. I feel sexy and more confident. I feel special.

  “Hey,” he utters softly.

  I look up at his handsome face etched with contentment and happiness. He lifts up slightly to kiss me softly before grasping my face in his hands.

  “I want to say something,” he starts gently.

  My face falls slightly, but his face is insisting that I trust him.

  I swallow nervously. “Okay,” I reply, worried.

  He opens his mouth before closing it, and then he admits, “I should go take care of the condom first.”

  Uh-oh. My mind races with a million things that he could want to talk about. None of them are good, but I just nod slowly.

  He sits up, so I’m straddling his lap with him still inside me.

  He kisses my nose. “Don’t look so worried. It’s nothing bad. I’ll be right back, okay?”

  That eases my nerves a little, so I nod again and slide off his lap. When he stands and strides to the bathroom, I quickly slide on my panties and shirt. I don’t want to have a serious conversation while I’m naked. He returns sans condom and nabs his boxer briefs. He slips them on while making his way over to where I’ve situated myself on the couch with my legs tucked under me. He sits next to me and reaches over to grab my hips. He hoists me onto his lap, so I’m straddling him. I go willingly, but inside, my heart is pounding. I’m scared about what he wants to say.

  He reaches up and pulls my lower lip out of my teeth, and then he leans in to kiss me tenderly. He takes a deep breath. “You know I’m not good with the whole emotions stuff and expressing myself, so I just want to lay something out there. You don’t have to respond, but I do want you to let me get it all out before you say anything.” When I nod, he continues, “I know you’re struggling with something, Anna.”

  I start to slide off his lap, wary of where he’s going with this, but he stops me.

  “Let me finish.”

  I nod cautiously.

  “I know you’re struggling with something, Anna, and I need you to know that I’m here for you. I want you to trust me, and I want to help heal your pain.”

  He grabs my face while I fight to swallow the lump in my throat.

  “I care about you, Anna, a lot. I think I’m starting to fall for you. I want you to trust me because my trust for you is growing. I want to build this relationship together, so I need you to trust me to be there for you and to help you through whatever it is you’re going through.”

  I feel tears spring to my eyes while I absorb his words. I clench my teeth, willing the tears away.

  He continues, “I don’t want to push you, baby, but I do want you to talk to me when you’re ready. I’ll be here to listen and help you, okay?”

  A tear escapes from my eye, and he brushes it away with his thumb. His
eyes search mine. They bore into me, imploring me to believe him, to trust him. Can I do that? Can I tell him? Can I bare my soul and let everything spill onto the floor and trust him to help me clean it up? No, not yet. But I think maybe, just possibly, I might be able to eventually. My gut squeezes at the possibility and the realization that someday I might trust this man enough to do what he’s asking. My heart compresses and swells simultaneously because he cares enough that I’m hurting. He thinks that I’m worth it.

  Another tear escapes, and he quickly brushes it away.

  I give a slight nod and I say, “I’ll try. Maybe someday, I’ll tell you.”

  He pulls me into a hug, burying his face into my neck, and I clutch him tightly.

  “For the record, I think I’m falling for you, too,” I whisper. It’s true. I am.

  I’ve somehow convinced Anna to join me today for Mom’s Sunday Sauce.

  After calming her nerves and convincing her to trust me that my family will love her, we’re on our way to my parent’s house. I want her to meet my family because I want this relationship to move forward, and it seems like the logical next step. My parents also want to meet the woman who’s captured my attention so completely. Those were Mom’s words, not mine, but they’re true nonetheless.

  I watch my woman as my family introduces themselves to her. She seems nervous but happy that my family seems to embrace her. I fucking love the way our relationship is moving along, especially after last night. To me, we feel more solid after last night. She even opened up a little and told me about her biological father and how his absence still hurts. I have a few friends who don’t know their fathers, so even though I can’t empathize, I can sympathize. I told her that it’s all on him, that he’s not man enough, and that it says nothing about her. She said that it helped a little when I told her that he probably doesn’t feel good enough for her, but she said it was hard to wrap her head around that way of thinking. I understand although I wish she didn’t think that way.

  After dinner, I’m sitting on the couch I glace over at Anna and my mom who are in a deep discussion over education and kids at the kitchen table. My mom ran a home daycare for twelve years, and she’s passionate on the subject as well. Anna is still pretty nervous and shy, but her freak-out rigidness is gone. I zero in on her as she tilts her head back in laughter from one of my mom’s stories. Her whole face lights up and shines. My heart squeezes, seeing her here like this with my family.