Backstory

by Avani Gregg

  If I were to watch my episodes back today, I’d probably cringe because I was so young and green! It was only two years ago, but it feels like an eternity. However, it did prove to me that acting is something I want to pursue. I want to take more acting classes so I can become more skilled at it. I was doing it for a while, but (yet again) the pandemic and all the mental stress associated with it cut those plans short. Not to worry, I will be back. Being on Chicken Girls was my chance to take part in the process of filming and see if I had it in me. I’d say the answer is a definite yes.

  A Girl Can Dream, Can’t She?

  If I could pick any role and any costar, here’s what and who I’d choose!

  I am obsessed with the TV series Euphoria. I love it with my whole heart. I could totally see myself acting in an edgy drama like that, and I would love to work with any of the girls on the show: Zendaya, Hunter Schafer, Maude Apatow, Barbie Ferreira, Alexa Demie, and Storm Reid. They’re the most talented cast I have ever seen and everything from the script to the makeup is goals.

  My ultimate leading man would have to be my boyfriend, Anthony (duh!). But if he was unavailable, I would settle for Leonardo DiCaprio circa the nineties. You know, the way he looked in Titanic, Romeo + Juliet, and The Quick and the Dead. I wouldn’t mind filming a rom-com with him—it’s only acting, after all.

  If I was doing a buddy film, I’d have to choose my bae Riley Hubatka to play my best friend, especially if it was a comedy, because she is just hilarious, spontaneous, and would keep me laughing the entire time. Second choice: I think it would be pretty amazing to act opposite Alexa Demie, who plays Maddie on Euphoria. Her acting is flawless.

  Run It Back: Could You Be an Actor?

  If you’re asking yourself whether acting is something you want to do, too, here’s what you need to know (full disclosure) before you decide:

  Acting takes sacrifice. It’s not all red carpets, limos, and dressing up. It’s hard work, long hours, and it comes with a steep learning curve. Ask yourself why you want to go into this profession. If you think it’s to be rich and famous, think again. Most actors never win an Oscar or have a steady income, at least not in the beginning. You have to be willing to pay your dues, wait tables, be an extra, whatever it takes. You may have to do something else, something not so fun or exciting, until a big break comes along (if it comes at all). So be ready to cancel plans on friends because you need to study lines, film a self-taped audition, or go to an acting class. Also, be willing to have a backup plan that can support you while you audition. My dad always tells me that hard work pays off. Here’s to hoping!

  Acting takes imagination. Can you picture yourself as someone else? Can you leave your own life behind and morph into another? This is my favorite part of acting—the ability to step into another person’s shoes and take a stroll around. It’s literally channeling a character so that you can become them in an authentic, believable way. When I played Gemma, I was Gemma. I thought like her and reacted like she would, given what I knew of her backstory. I can’t think of anything cooler than getting hired to pretend.

  Acting takes patience. There aren’t many overnight sensations in Hollywood. Accept that getting anywhere as a pro actor will take time, commitment, and a stubborn refusal to give up on your dreams. You will also spend lots of hours auditioning, waiting in the green room, and sitting in school on set. I can’t sit still very long, so this is where I need the most practice, but it comes with the territory. If I want to be an actor, I can’t expect insta-fame or insta-success. It’s a nice idea, but it’s not gonna happen.

  Acting takes studying. I know, that was a hard one for me to swallow, too. But you will have to learn lots of lines, work with acting coaches, and even research your role or the time period during which your project is set. What I will tell you is this: it gets easier. The first time I saw the Chicken Girls scripts and highlighted every sentence I needed to memorize, I freaked. I thought, What did I get myself into? But I broke it down into smaller segments and made sure that my director knew I was struggling. My castmates were always happy to run lines because it helped me to hear how they sounded when spoken. Everyone was really nice about it and, little by little, I got better and didn’t flub my lines or forget which way I was supposed to walk down the hall.

  Acting isn’t all about you. When you’re part of a cast, it’s a group effort, with everyone (hopefully) checking their egos at the door and coming together to create something great. It’s no wonder that so many actors consider the cast and crew family. It truly feels that way because you spend more time together than you do with your own family. I also felt really humbled and grateful to be around a group who had grown up in their roles. You can’t walk into an audition or set thinking you’re better than everyone else. I’m all for confidence, but not when it steps on people in the process. Be kind, be cool, and be a team player.

  chapter fifteen Afterthoughts

  Here I am at the end of my book. Let’s just take a minute to absorb this: “The End.” It took me several months to get to this place, and I don’t mean emailing the manuscript to my editor. I mean that I feel like I’m a different person who has gone through so much soul-searching, shape-shifting, and upheaval while trying to make sense of it all on paper! Yet, here I am—standing, surviving, and killin’ it. Applause, please, I made it! Just like graduating from high school, it’s a huge milestone for me and a lot went into it.

  Think about what the year 2020 brought, not just for me, but for all of us. I saw my plans evaporate. I was isolated from my friends, my grandparents, and the world in general. Whenever I poked my head out for some air, I freaked out or got criticized for not “taking the pandemic seriously.” Oh, I took it seriously. It scared me and sent me running to a place of sadness, fear, and insecurity. My mental health took a nosedive. It’s hard to be optimistic about anything when you have no idea what is going to happen next. My parents wanted to tell me everything would be okay, but they didn’t know that for sure and they didn’t want to make promises they couldn’t keep. We just hung in and slowly but surely, things started to calm down. I kept posting on my socials, I filmed my show, I did photo shoots, and I sat in on creative meetings via Zoom. I’ve come this far and it’s soon to be further.

  I feel like I’m not just a year older, it’s like I’ve aged a decade LOL. I feel a little old and tired sometimes from just having to deal, but I’m also wiser and stronger for it. As I write this, the world is still on shaky ground. We’re all hanging our hopes on a new day and waiting for things to pick up where they left off. Did I mention that patience is not one of my strong suits? I have found these past several months so frustrating and so freakin’ annoying. But, like I named my show, I’m here for it (all of it) because I don’t think you can ever know what the good looks like unless you have the bad to compare it to. On my IG feed, I captioned one of the pics: “I could really use a good reboot, reset, refresh.” I think we all could and I am holding on to the hope that one day soon, I can hug every one of you, see you face-to-face, and thank you for sticking by me. I am where I am and what I am because you believe in me and listen to what I have to say. This book is just that—thank you for stopping by!

  I’ve done a deep dive into my past, acknowledged my present, and now (here we go!) I’m ready to do some gazing into my crystal ball so I can see the future. I don’t think small. I see myself doing more fashion looks, maybe planning or launching my own line. I’m going to be working with more affordable brands because they speak to my thrifting spirit. I don’t believe something has to be expensive to be cool. I want to teach people how to express themselves fearlessly through fashion and get creative with it.

  I want to continue to act. That’s always been a dream of mine, and I got a small taste of it when I filmed Chicken Girls, but I see movies in my future and think I could do drama as well as comedy. I would love to get the chance to flex those muscles a little. Stay tuned.

  Beyond that, hmmm… I suppose I should keep m
y options open, right? I’m a planner, so I’m not a fan of leaving things up in the air but, sometimes, you can be happily surprised by what comes your way. I’m just trying to spend some time sitting in the unknown. You can always be prepared for the worst, but don’t forget to hope for the best. I don’t need to have my entire future laid out in front of me; I can leave some things open to chance. It’s like when colleges ask you to decide your major when you’re applying. How do you know? How do you have a clear picture of where you’ll be one year, two years, or four years from now? If you do, that’s great and highly impressive—some people just know they want to be a veterinarian from birth. I thought I wanted to be a gymnast, but we saw how that turned out. Things can change in the blink of an eye. Didn’t we learn that from the pandemic as well? Isn’t it better to just roll with it, trust the universe, stop fighting the uncertainty, and see it as an opportunity for something awesome to arise? Kind of like when I go thrifting: I have no idea what I might find, but that’s the excitement. It could be great, it could be not-so-great, but there’s always a possibility that something really valuable might come of it.

  Writing this book also taught me to release my fear. Certain situations will always scare me, but jumping into this one got me out of my comfort zone and showed me I don’t have to be afraid to tell my truth. I’m really excited for everyone I know and have known to read about the real me. I think it will definitely change some minds.

  But let’s be real here: I’m eighteen. I’m still learning and figuring stuff out, and I’ve got a whole lot of living to do. One day, I might look back on all of this and wonder, What in the world was I thinking? And that’s okay. I hope I keep growing and reevaluating what matters to me. If all this has been a small part of what I do with the rest of my life, then I’m cool with it. It’s a snapshot of the girl I was on the way to becoming the woman I will be, and I gotta say, I kinda like her. She’s a little weird, a little opinionated and stubborn, but she grows on you. So yes, it’s “The End” but it’s really “The Beginning.” See you around.

  Run It Back: What’s Your A.Q. (Avani Quotient)?

  Since graduating online high school, I have not been missing all those quizzes and tests. But not all of them have to be brain-busting, right? Why not take one for fun, all about me? I’m kinda curious to know if you were really paying attention (if not, don’t worry—I’m an easy grader!).

  The nickname my family calls me is: Von Gretal

  Sugar Daddy

  Voni

  My two dogs are named: Jack and Benny

  Ben and Jerry

  Beb and Bebe

  I first met my BF Anthony: online

  in line at a meet/greet

  at a flea market, thrifting

  My very first Clown Girl face: had black oozing out of her mouth

  had purple skin

  had stars around her eyes

  My favorite snack to eat is: seaweed

  black licorice

  avocado pudding

  If it wasn’t called Hype, our social house might have been known as: House of Olympus

  the Baddie House

  House of Charli

  One of the best gifts Anthony has ever gotten me was: a giant cookie with his face on it

  Louis Vuitton sneakers

  purple forever roses

  If I were stranded on a desert island, the one thing I could NOT live without is: my eyebrow tweezer

  my Ren & Stimpy DVD collection

  Diet Coke

  I have NOT been bullied for: my purple car

  wearing a shirt that says “World’s Greatest Grandpa”

  being a TikTok star

  I have NOT been on vacay to: Hawaii

  Bahamas

  Paris

  ANSWERS:

  1. Voni; 2. Jack and Benny; 3. online; 4. had stars around her eyes; 5. seaweed; 6. House of Olympus; 7. purple forever roses; 8. Diet Coke; 9. wearing a shirt that says “World’s Greatest Grandpa”; 10. Paris

  If you got 8+ answers correct: Congrats! You’re an Avani expert. You probably know more about me than I do LMAO. Anthony is not at all threatened. Okay, maybe just a little…

  If you got 6–8 answers correct: You might have missed a few details while reading, but I won’t hold it against you. I’m not sure if my two sisters could have scored 100 percent, but there’s only one way to find out!

  If you got 5 or fewer correct: Have we met? Just kiddin’! Go back through the book and see if you can learn some more about me—and yourself while you’re at it. It’s worth extra-credit points!

  On Avani

  Last words: What is the one word that comes to mind when you think of me?

  Nessa Barrett: Passionate (and wifey!)

  Madi Monroe: Hilarious

  Benji Krol: Philocaly

  Charli D’Amelio: Talented

  Riley Hubatka: Kind

  Seb Topete: Fishy (JK!) Caring

  Krissy Saleh: Extraordinary

  Lydia Pettersson: Real

  Chase Keith: Catnoir

  Anthony Reeves: Mine

  My grand entrance (with my mom), November 23, 2002.

  Photo by Lewis Gregg.

  Baby Voni, one month old.

  Photo by Anisha Gregg.

  Daddy’s little girl.

  Photo by Anisha Gregg.

  My big sister, Shanti, was always my number one fan.

  Photo by Lewis Gregg.

  I always had a flair for fashion (3 months).

  Photo by Lewis Gregg.

  Always smiling. Loved purple since the beginning (20 months)!

  Photo by Anisha Gregg.

  First day of kindergarten.

  Photo by Anisha Gregg.

  Sister Act: me (left), 17 months, and Shanti (right), 3 ½, with our first dog, King.

  Photo by Lewis Gregg.

  Dynamic Duo, summertime.

  Photo by Lewis Gregg.

  And Priya makes three, 2006.

  Photo by Lewis Gregg.

  My fam going to an Indian wedding in 2006.

  Courtesy of Gregg family.

  Christmastime 2010 (trying to convince Santa I was a good girl this year).

  Photo by Anisha Gregg.

  With Pop-Pop and Na-Na on my second birthday.

  Photo by Lewis Gregg.

  With my Ba, Dada, and sisters.

  Photo by Anisha Gregg.

  I had a natural talent for gymnastics (age 7).

  Photo by Lewis Gregg.

  My very first gymnastics class at Dana Mannix Gymnastics (age 3).

  Photo by Lewis Gregg.

  Shanti teaching me a handstand.

  Photo by Lewis Gregg.

  Ready to compete (age 8)!

  Photo by Lewis Gregg.

  Won so many medals over the years, we lost count (age 6).

  Photo by Lewis Gregg.

  Me with my trophy after a gymnastics meet in 2013, level 4 (age 11).

  Photo by Lewis Gregg.

  Practice makes perfect… even at the Grand Canyon.

  Photo by Anisha Gregg.

  Level 8 state meet in 2017.

  Photo by Lewis Gregg.

  All makeup looks courtesy of Avani.

  Where it all starts: my sketches.

  Photos of sketches by Avani.

  My first Clown Girl look.

  Mirror selfie with Charli.

  Photo courtesy of Avani.

  On vacay, from left to right: Chase, Charli, me, and Anthony.

  Photo courtesy of Bryant Eslava.

  Me with my girl, Riley.

  Photo courtesy of Avani.

  Me with Rowan, my Interactive Gymnastics teammate.

  Photo courtesy of Avani.

  Madi always gives me a lift.

  Photo courtesy of Avani.

  My hometown bestie, Lydia.

  Photo courtesy of Avani.

  Me with Katie (one of my gym teammates) at VidCon in 2019.

  Photo courtesy of Avani.

  Me with Chase
Keith at Social Bash in Boston.

  Photo by Shanti Gregg.

  Clowning with my gymnastics bud, Gracie.

  Photo courtesy of Avani.

  My beb, Anthony.

  Photo by Riley Hubatka.

  Photo by Bryant Eslava.

  Photo by Bryant Eslava.

  Photo by Riley Hubatka.

  Winning my TikToker of the Year Shorty Award!

  Photo by Anisha Gregg.

  My furry babies, Jack and Benny.

  Photo by Anisha Gregg.

  Always there for me (from left to right: Mom, Priya, Shanti, me, and Dad).

  Photo by Bryant Eslava.

  My dream car!

  Photo by Anisha Gregg.

  Acknowledgments

  I had no idea what it would take to write a book. There was no way I could have done it by myself. I wouldn’t have had enough words to fill up a page if it weren’t for everyone who has been in my life in some way, shape, or form. I’m overwhelmed by all the love and support I’ve received. I want everyone to know I did not go through any part of my life alone, and I would not be here today without my friends and family.