“Gentlemen, this is Javon Sanders. I invited him down here so we can get a formal statement plus explain to him where we will be going from here.”
“Hello, Javon. My name is Trent Ipswich!” the stranger said and got up and tried to shake my hand.
“Who are you?” For some reason, I felt like something wasn’t right. I searched my brain real fast. I wondered where I had seen this nigga before.
“This is the man you were supposed to kill.”
“Supposed to kill? What the fuck are you talking about?” See, this fuck nigga was playing games and shit. These niggas were only playing with me because they knew I didn’t have my pistol.
“You heard correct. See, you weren’t totally honest with us about what happened. What you failed to mention was that you were not the one who shot Detective Ipswich. Your good friend was the one who walked into the house that night. I know you are trying to figure out what the hell is going on, so let me run it by you. We knew that Malaya wanted you to kill her husband, and you, in turn, told your boy. We found out about this, so we staged the murder scene. As you can see, he is alive and kicking.”
“You all played me! Y’all knew this nigga wasn’t dead, but y’all came at me like y’all were investigating a fucking murder! Y’all fucked me raw like a bitch!”
I scooted down in my chair; I’d never felt so fucking low before in my life. This was a setup from the gate. The only other person who knew about the plan to kill the nigga was my ex-partner. My mind raced back to the day he begged me to let him handle it. I now saw it wasn’t because he was looking out for me; it was because he was trying to save the nigga from getting killed.
“I’m about to bounce up outta here. I can’t believe I let y’all pussy niggas play me like this. Everything was a fucking lie. Y’all used me to make a case; y’all ain’t have no case.” I laughed, not because shit was funny but because I fucked up.
“Sit down, Mr. Sanders. We’re not finished here,” the DA boy said while he looked through a folder.
“Nah, we’re done. I came in here voluntarily. Remember?”
“I said sit down, unless you want me to slap this charge on you.”
“What fucking charge? Shit, the nigga ain’t dead and, you said it yourself, I wasn’t the one who did the fake killing.” I stood up. I was done for real. I turned to walk out.
I heard a voice; it was mine. I turned around; there was mini recorder on the table. I took a step closer. It was my and Mann-Mann’s voices on there. I quickly realized that it was the night we met up at the club and were talking. The same night that my dumb ass confessed to him that I killed D. Drizzle and his mother. It was like a sharp knife kept sticking me in open wounds over and over again. Sweat started forming on my forehead as my body temperature rose. I wanted to grab the police gun and start busting at these niggas, but I knew that I wouldn’t make it out alive.
The DA cut the tape off and then spoke. “Yes, that’s right. That’s you on this recording, discussing the brutal murder of one of your codefendants and his mother. I don’t have to tell you that if convicted of your previous charges and this murder, you will be gone for the rest of your life. The only way I see out of all this is if you tell us everything about the plan to murder Detective Ipswich and also if you’re willing to take the stand and testify against Mrs. Ipswich.”
I sat there, staring at this nigga! Was this what my life had become? The same thing I despised I’d become myself: a fucking rat. On the outside, it looked like everything was all right but, inside, that shit was eating me up.
“What is it going to be, Mr. Sanders?” the fuck nigga detective boy said.
I wanted to yell, fuck you, nigga, but I knew better. I knew they were not playing fair, and if I reneged on my word, they would toast my ass. My decision was easy.
“The deal is still on the table? Before I say another word, I need it in writing: that I’m getting full immunity on e’erything.”
“All right, let’s roll. First, you need to talk; then we will decide if it’s a deal that we want,” the DA said.
It took me forty minutes to spill my guts about any-and everything they wanted to know. During that time, I blocked out everything I learned in the streets about loyalty and the “no snitching” code. A nigga snitched on me and didn’t think twice, so why should I be worried about snitching on a bitch I was only fucking?
* * *
Malaya
I signed the bond papers and walked out of the jail. My car was still parked outside because they didn’t have a chance to tow it yet. As soon as I walked out, I saw Isiah and Dana. I wished he hadn’t brought her in on this, but what the heck? I didn’t have much of a choice. She was very sharp and knew the business well, so she might become a very valuable asset on my case.
“Hey, baby.” She ran to me and hugged me. I hugged her back, not because I was happy to see her ass but because my ass was happy to be out of jail.
“Hey, diva.” Isiah hugged me.
“Hey, hon. Thank you for getting me out so quick. I almost died up in that hell hole,” I exclaimed.
“You didn’t drop the soap, did you?” Isiah joked and winked at me.
“Ha-ha. I see you’ve got jokes. I’m just happy I didn’t make it down to the jail.”
“Malaya, we really need to discuss this case against you.”
“I know, but I’m tired, and I need to get home and take care of my children. Matter of fact, I need to let them know their daddy is not dead. It was all a sham so they could get me caught up in some conspiracy bullshit.”
“Malaya, listen to me. I need you not to have any contact with Javon Sanders, business or personal,” Dana said.
“What are you talking about?” I shot her a strange look.
“This is off the record, but I’m pretty sure Isiah will get this info really soon. He is the one who gave them this information. He told the DA you asked him to kill Trent, and I heard he is cooperating one hundred percent with them.”
I thought I was not hearing her correctly. I looked at Isiah and then back at Dana. They both had the same serious look on their faces. “You’ve got to be kidding me.” I looked for a hint of joking on her face, but there was none.
“No. According to my source, while Javon was in the hospital they approached him, and he fell for it, apparently to save his own ass.”
“That nigga is a criminal; why would I trust him? He is a liar; I never asked him to kill my husband. I can’t believe this shit,” I yelled out.
“The DA believes they have a solid case against you.”
“I don’t give a damn what the DA believes. I know I’m innocent, and I intend to prove it. If I wanted Trent dead, I would’ve killed him my-damn-self, not ask a nigga who already had a criminal case going on. I’m not no fool; I know the law.”
“We’re going to beat these charges. In the meantime, I need you to stay away from Mr. Sanders. Don’t talk to him or discuss your case with him or anyone else outside of Dana and me. In the meantime, I think you need to stay away from the firm. Let us handle everything.”
“I love doing what I do. I have clients who are depending on me,” I lashed out.
“I understand that, but those clients will be all right. You need to worry about you. These are some serious charges that can put you behind bars for a very long time. I need you to be focused on Malaya and not on everybody else.”
I knew what he was saying made a lot of sense, but I was stubborn.
“Listen, I’ve got to go. I’ll call you in the morning. Thanks, Dana. We’ll talk in the a.m. also.”
I walked away and walked toward my car. I opened the door and got in. I was physically and mentally drained. I wished I had somewhere to go so I wouldn’t have to face the girls. How would I begin to tell them that their daddy wasn’t dead, but I was charged with a terrible crime? I felt a terrible migraine coming on. I massaged my temple, trying to ease the pain.
I made it home just in time. As soon as I pulled up, the
girls were getting off their bus. I opened the door and walked inside, leaving the door open for them. I heard when they entered the house. I was nervous because I wasn’t sure how I was going to start this conversation.
“Hey, Mama,” Nyesha yelled.
“Hey,” Myesha said.
I walked into the living room. “Girls, I need to talk to both of you.”
“I’m tired, plus I’ve got homework,” Myesha said and attempted to walk away.
“I said I need to talk to both of you. Now!”
They both sat on the couch, looking at me. I sat on the couch across from them. “Girls, I have something serious to talk to you all about.”
“All right,” Myesha said with an attitude.
I decided to say what the fuck I was saying before I ended up choking this grown-ass child sitting in front of me. “Today, I was arrested.”
“Arrested for what?” Nyesha blurted out.
“Probably for killing Daddy,” Myesha said.
“Stop saying that! Mama didn’t kill Daddy. Grandma and them have you brainwashed.”
“Shut up! Both of you!” I screamed. “Anyway, I was arrested today. The police are saying I had something to do with your father’s botched murder. I say botched because your daddy is not dead. I saw him today. No, he was not shot and killed.”
“Daddy is alive? Where is he?” Myesha jumped up off of the couch and stepped toward me.
“You better sit your ass down. Yes, he is alive, and now I’ve been accused of trying to kill him.”
“Mama, they know it’s not true, right? I saw Daddy; he was dead.”
“Baby, obviously somebody wanted your daddy dead, so the police believe it’s me. I’m just telling y’all this before anyone else does. They staged your daddy’s murder. I saw him today. He’s alive and kicking.”
Myesha got up, shot me a dirty look, and walked off. Nyesha got up and ran over to me, hugging me.
“Mama, you have to beat these charges. I know you didn’t do this. I swear, Mama, I will always be here with you. We’re gonna fight, and we’re gonna beat these charges.”
My eyes teared up as I listened to my baby girl. How could two girls who were so identical be so different? I hugged her as tight as I could. Even though she wasn’t aware, her words just gave me the strength I needed!
* * *
The next morning, I had to be in court for my preliminary hearing, and the judge gave me a strict warning to stay away from Trent. I looked at the judge and wondered what the fuck he was on. What in God’s name would I be talking to Trent’s ass for? That nigga set me up.
After court, I talked with Isiah for a little before I walked off. He might have been the lawyer, but I was going to be the one controlling my defense. I was good at what I did, and I wasn’t going to let someone else take control of my destiny.
I was about to get on the elevator when I spotted Devon. “I need to talk to you,” I said as he walked by.
He stopped and gave me this nervous look. “You know I can’t talk to you.” He looked around suspiciously.
“What do you mean? We’re friends, right?”
“Malaya, we’re friends. I’m sorry. I just can’t lose my job behind this.”
“Lose your job? You have an issue with talking to me, but you don’t have one when you’re sticking your dick in me.”
“I’m sorry! I have to go.” He walked away.
“Fuck you!” I said out of frustration.
I was pissed off that, out of everyone, he would behave like that with me. I was fighting for my freedom, and he was worried about a fucking job. I smiled at the irony of all of this. Let’s see how much longer he will have that job.
* * *
Javon
I stopped by the funeral home to drop off the rest of the money to the director. I was grateful that I had enough to pay if off. I was forever indebted to Abraham for going out of his way and throwing me that ten stacks. I still had the rest of the money stashed away in my hotel room. I was holding on to it so that when all of this shit was over, I’d have money to bounce back off.
Even though I couldn’t stand Tania’s mother, I was happy she took over the planning of the funeral. God knows I wasn’t in the shape to plan one, so the bitch was good for something besides running her mouth. She also told me of her plan to cremate her daughter so she could put her on her dresser. I did miss her, but I had too much shit to worry about right now. She was dead and didn’t have to worry about anything else.
I spent the rest of the evening drinking, smoking, and indulging in self-pity until I passed out. I tried not to break down, but my soul was hurting. I knew I was a piece of shit human being, but I was damn good father.
I was up bright and early. I sat in the corner of my hotel room, just staring at the different pictures of my kids and me. I had over a hundred pictures of them, from the time they were small. I looked at my little man, and it took my memory to the day when he was born. I smiled. I remembered how scared I was. I thought I would break him because he looked so fragile. I smiled because he had brought so much happiness to my life. I felt myself getting teary-eyed, so I got up and put the phone down. I took a shower and got dressed. The funeral services were set to begin in another hour. I wished I didn’t have to go, but there was no way I would miss that chance. I was present for their births, and I would be there when they descended into the ground, because I was their daddy.
I was surprised to see how the hood came out to show support. I thought that after I caught my case, they ain’t fuck wit’ a nigga no more, but I was wrong. From the chicks I done fucked or was just cool with to the niggas I dealt with before, they were all out, showing their respect to my little soldiers. I also noticed the detectives in the midst. I didn’t even look their way for fear that someone might see and jump to the conclusion that I was tight with the police.
I tried my best to be strong; plus, I didn’t want to break down in front of people. A few dope boys came up to me and let me know that if I ever needed them, they had me. It gave me hope because I felt like the hood turned their backs on a nigga. I looked around to see if Abraham might’ve came through, even though I knew that the chances were slim to none. I’d never seen him outside of that house before. I was only hoping he would’ve made an exception. After all, they were his blood.
I managed not to shed a tear today, even though I was tearing up inside. I knew they were still here with their daddy, no matter what. I grabbed me something to eat and a few bags of powder. I tried powder years ago, but Tania found out and made me promise not to ever do that shit again, and I didn’t, until now. I loved smoking weed, but this pain I was feeling called for something stronger. I also bought a bottle of Cîroc and a few blunts. I needed to get my mind off my children and focus on a much a happier time.
I sat at the table in the room and took out a bag of the powder cocaine and emptied it in a one dollar bill. I took my first sniff of the powder. Nothing happened. I then took another sniff, and that’s when the magic started. The drug illuminated my brain, and I suddenly felt happy. All that sadness I felt a few minutes ago disappeared that fast. I started laughing at how much I missed the euphoric feeling, the feeling that made me feel like I could conquer the world. I kept sniffing until every drop I had on that money was gone. I was high out of my freaking mind. It was a good high, though; this was what I needed to get through this pain.
I was lying on the bed, enjoying my high, when I heard a banging on the door. It kind of startled me. I jumped up and grabbed the dollar bill and crumbled it up. I looked through the peephole, and I realized it was Abraham. What the fuck is he doing here? I never told him where I was staying.
I thought about ignoring the door and just pretending I wasn’t in there, but I was curious to see what he wanted. Like I said earlier, I had never seen him out of that house before. I opened the door and let him in. “Hey, Dad,” I said gleefully.
“Young Killa,” he said and walked inside the room.
I closed the door behind us. “What a pleasant surprise. How did you know where I was?”
“I told you, I know a lot,” he emphasized.
I didn’t like how he said that, but I was too high to address anything. I took a seat in the chair, just staring down at the carpet.
“So, what can I do for you, Dad?”
He took a seat by the edge of the bed; I noticed he was dressed in all black, even down to the gloves he was wearing.
“How was the funeral?”
“It was a’ight. You know?”
“You know, son, my whole life I lived in these streets, and I’ve seen all kinds of shit, but I’ve always kept my nose clean. I’m from the old school where talking to the police is a crime within itself.”
“A’ight, what’s all of this?” I wasn’t in the mood for no proverbs today. As a matter of fact, I was ready for him to go so I could go back to handling my business.
“I thought you was a G, a real thoroughbred, so you had to know how disappointed I was when I found out you were a fucking rat. My flesh and blood is a snitch!”
“Man, what the fuck are you talking ’bout? I ain’t no fucking rat. I live in these motherfucking streets, and I don’t fuck wit’ no police,” I stood up and yelled.
“I told you, I know everything that goes down in this town, and I know you are running your mouth to the detectives about that lawyer bitch. I know you’re the reason why she’s locked up. Ain’t no bitch in my blood, so I know there’s no way you can possibly be mine. I came here to kill you, but talking to you changed my mind. I’m gonna let you live so you can suffer in the worst way. After the police use you and throw you away like the piece of garbage you are, I will run you out of this town. No one will ever do business with you again, and if you ever mention my name to them, I promise you, you will be killed, and your body will never be found.” He stared me in the eyes.
“Old nigga, you threatening me? Big mistake. I ain’t no bitch, and I will dead you if I have to. Believe that! Now, get the fuck out of my room, and just know that this is my motherfucking town. You should see how the hood came out to support a nigga,” I bragged.
Falling for My Side Dude Page 17