by Harper Bliss
“A gorgeous fifty-one.” Quinn didn’t know why, but she suddenly felt silly saying it like that.
“Was she at her most beautiful?” Maya asked.
“You remember.” Quinn felt a touch less silly.
“Some things are impossible to forget.” Maya leaned back in her chair as if she wasn’t going anywhere soon.
“How about another coffee?” Quinn asked.
Chapter 13
Quinn’s presence was as magnetic as Maya remembered. She might as well enjoy it for a little longer because she had no intention of seeing her old neighbor again after today—although she was curious as to how Quinn’s pictures of her would turn out.
Maya watched Quinn make her way to the counter. She was wearing the kind of high-waisted jeans that had been all the rage a few decades ago and had, as if by magic, become trendy again. Maya hadn’t made it to Brooklyn yet—she’d been far too infatuated with Ethan to tear herself away from him for too long—but she imagined Quinn fitted right in.
Flashes of their night together sparked in Maya’s mind. Even though it had happened so long ago, Maya still felt guilty about it. It was the main reason why she had, slowly over the years, spent less and less time with Bill and Brooke. Being in their company made Maya so uncomfortable, she could no longer relax. Every time either one of them mentioned Quinn, Maya felt the weight of her secret, and she was convinced that her neighbors would somehow be able to read off her face what had happened between her and their daughter.
“Here you go.” Quinn deposited a steaming mug in front of her.
After she sat, she said, “I didn’t mean to go all emo on you earlier, by the way. Sorry about that.”
“That’s all right.” Maya picked up her coffee and inhaled the fragrant steam rising up from the mug. “Whatever happened to…” She remembered a lot from that night, but the name of Quinn’s previous ex escaped her.
“Do you mean Rachel?” Quinn asked.
Maya nodded.
“Hell if I know. I never saw her again. Something must have happened that summer that helped me move on.” She glanced at Maya over the rim of her cup. A silence fell.
That night hung heavy in the air between them. It was what simultaneously kept Maya glued to her seat and made her want to run away.
Quinn broke the silence first. “I never told anyone. As you asked.”
Maya arched up her eyebrows. “Really? Literally not one other person?”
Quinn gave a slow shake of the head. “I’ve always wanted to keep my promise to you. Maybe in honor of that night, which was… special.”
Heat rose in Maya’s cheeks and it wasn’t because of the hot cup of coffee she was holding. “I really appreciate that,” she managed to say.
“Did you tell anyone?”
“No.” Who would Maya have told? Her friends in Milbury? “Not a living soul.”
“It really has been our secret then.” A sparkle danced in Quinn’s eyes. “I wonder what will happen now that it’s being talked about again, after all these years.”
Maya chuckled. “It’s a treat to see you as well, Quinn. It’s good to know you’re doing so well, minus the blip in your love life, of course.”
“Fuck Morgan.” Quinn rolled her eyes. “As if she’s suddenly going to be happy with her massive bore of a husband.” She waved her hand about. “But let’s not go there again.”
“No more bartending for you?” Maya was more than happy to move on from the subject.
“My bartending days are well and truly over, but I do still very much like a party. That’s how I made my name as a photographer. I shot parties. Then I started messing around with the pictures in Photoshop. One thing led to another. And here I am today, photographing you.” She wiggled her fingers about. “I can’t wait to get started.” She tilted her head. “You do realize I’ll be looking at you with laser-like focus for a great many hours to come.”
Maya didn’t know what to say to that. She still felt a touch flustered.
“Perk of the job.” Quinn’s gaze on her softened. “You no longer own your dance school. That must have been a big change.”
“I mainly teach kids now, which I love, actually,” Maya said. “Considering that they’ve been put in dance class by their parents, most of them go at it with great enthusiasm, which is wonderful to work with. When it comes to certain dance steps, you can’t teach them young enough.”
“Acton’s very posh, though. Is that the only school you teach at?”
Maya nodded. “I don’t want to work full-time anymore. Nor do I want the responsibility of running my own business any longer. I’ve done that all my life.”
“Time to focus on yourself?”
“In a way.” Quinn had a way of asking questions that made Maya want to tell her things she should really keep to herself. That’s how trouble started. Maya knew that much from when she’d last spent time with Quinn. “I haven’t made this huge change in my life only to be Ethan’s granny.”
Quinn nodded and kept silent. The Quinn from all those years ago—the one who so shamelessly seduced Maya—would have taken the opportunity to insert some flirty banter here. But today, they weren’t flirting. In almost every respect, it felt like two old friends catching up. Almost, but not quite. Because they weren’t friends. They’d been lovers, albeit for one night only.
“When I was being coy earlier,” Maya started, because, apparently, when Quinn Hathaway was around, she couldn’t quite help herself. “When I didn’t want to say why else I decided to sell everything and move here…” Maya took a quick sip of coffee. “It’s because I wanted to, uh, explore dating women.” There. She’d said it. It wasn’t the first time, but admitting this to Quinn, who for all Maya knew might have sparked the whole thing, was a big deal to her. “It’s easier in the city.”
“I bet.” Quinn smiled warmly. “And? Have you had any luck on the NYC lesbian dating scene?”
“Well, I mean, it’s all apps now these days, isn’t it?” Maya mumbled.
“Yeah.” Quinn scrunched her lips together. “Which ones are you on?” She nodded as though something had occurred to her. “I must have missed you because after Morgan I changed my search parameters to below the age of fifty only.”
“Oh, Quinn. You do crack me up.” Maya had to grin.
“I haven’t really been looking, though,” Quinn admitted. “But how funny would it have been if I had seen you on Tinder?” She shook her head. “I wouldn’t have known what to do with myself, to be perfectly honest.”
They both chuckled although not solely out of mirth. Maya had a lot of nervous tension to release.
“I don’t search below the age of forty-five, for your information,” Maya said.
“Pity.” Quin fixed her gaze on Maya’s briefly, then looked away. “Have you been on any dates?”
“One since I moved here.” One date in seven months wasn’t overly industrious. “But I do have one lined up for this weekend.”
Quinn burst into a giggle. “Do you know what my first thought was when you just said that?”
Maya shook her head.
“Is it anyone I know or have dated myself?” Quinn clearly had no trouble joking about her own age-gap proclivities.
Maya laughed with her. Now that she’d mentioned her upcoming date, the nerves she felt at its prospect added themselves to the agitation Quinn inspired in her. Laughing eased the tension somewhat. “I really wouldn’t know. Her name’s Beverly and she’s in her fifties like me. But that’s all I know.”
“Hot?” Quinn waggled her eyebrows.
“She looked pretty good in the pictures I’ve seen.” Maya couldn’t believe the conversation had taken this turn. All of a sudden, she was talking to Quinn as close friends did. How had that happened?
“Beverly won’t know what hit her when she meets you.” Quinn looked very sincere as she said that. “Why did the other date not work out, if you don’t mind me asking?”
Maya had only found the coura
ge to install the app—and the patience to find out how it worked—a couple of months ago. She’d kept herself to browsing only for the first few weeks, until she’d chanced upon Kim’s profile. “I guess I just… didn’t feel the spark. She was perfectly lovely. I just didn’t really feel like seeing her again afterward. That I’d rather stay in and babysit my grandson, who, although utterly adorable, is just a baby who demands things by crying his little heart out, told me all I needed to know.”
“Wow.” Quinn sank her teeth into her bottom lip. “I’m sorry, Maya. I’m still processing that you’re dating women now. How did Tommy react when you told him?”
“I haven’t told him,” Maya blurted out. “There hasn’t really been anything to tell.”
“Okay.”
“If I get involved in something serious I will tell him, of course, but I see no reason to upset his image of me while I remain single.”
“His image of you? What would that be?”
“That I’m straight, of course. I’ve never given him reason to think otherwise in all of his twenty-eight years.”
“Maybe the fact that you haven’t had a relationship with a man in more than ten—or is it fifteen years now?—might give something away. Tommy wasn’t born yesterday, Maya. You should know.”
“Look, I know my son. He just… doesn’t think of me in that way. In a way that allows a lot of room for change. I can hardly blame him for that, seeing as I’m the one who raised him.”
“He’s not a homophobe, is he?”
“No, of course not. He’s never had one bad word to say about you, Quinn, and he has plenty of friends who are gay and gender-fluid and all the other things people are these days.”
“But they’re not this mother.”
Maya nodded. This was simply not something she could easily discuss with her son. She’d have a much easier time talking about it with her daughter-in-law. She’d even come close to telling Beth’s mother, Belinda, who had become a friend since she’d moved to the city. But the truth was that she’d only told Angus, her neighbor from across the hall, because he was gay himself.
Maya would worry about Tommy later. She was only exploring. Nothing had even happened with another woman. She’d only kissed Kim on the cheek and while Maya had expected a rush of feel-good hormones to engulf her—the way she remembered it from her night with Quinn—her hormones seemed to have gone on strike.
“You should take all the time you need, of course,” Quinn said.
“I will.” Maya had taken a lot of time already, she realized now that she was sitting here with Quinn.
“The rest will work itself out,” Quinn added.
Maya downed the last of her coffee. “I should probably get going now.”
“Oh.” Quinn looked disappointed. “Already?”
“I have things to do.”
“You’re not running away because of what we just talked about?” Quinn wasn’t one to beat about the bush.
“No. I—” Maya took a deep breath and looked into Quinn’s face. “I’m in this overwhelming new phase of my life and seeing you has… I’ll be honest. It has thrown me a little, Quinn.”
“Believe me, it has thrown me as well.”
“I said it ten years ago and I will say it again now.” Maya tried her best not to sound as though she was preaching. “You will find your way. You’ll get over Morgan, like you got over Rachel. You have your art and your passion and you’re still as wonderful to be around as ever.” Maya almost gave Quinn a maternal pat on the knee.
“How about you, though? Will you find your way?” Quinn asked.
Maya looked squarely into Quinn’s eyes. They were so bright and blue. Not the icy kind of blue some eyes could be, but the warm, azure blue of the ocean on a sun-drenched day.
“I don’t see why not.” Maya injected as much hope into her voice as she could.
“Good luck with Beverly. You’ll knock her socks right off.” Clearly, Quinn couldn’t help some mild flirting, although Maya wasn’t sure she could even interpret it as that. Maybe she was just being encouraging in her own way.
“Thank you.”
“I’ll be in touch about the pictures.” Quinn pushed herself out of her chair.
“I look forward to seeing your work.” Maya rose as well.
“Some of it will be displayed in a gallery in Brooklyn next month. If you’re interested, you should come. I’ll send you an invite to the opening.”
“Okay.” Maya was fairly certain she wouldn’t be crossing the Brooklyn Bridge for a gathering of hipsters half her age.
“Or you can follow me on Instagram. I post a lot of my stuff on there.”
“Sure.” Even though it didn’t really have to be, especially because they both lived in the same city now, it felt like a sort of goodbye again.
“Remember what my mom told you. Call me if you need anything.” Quinn opened her arms.
Maya stepped closer and with Quinn’s hands lightly pressing against her shoulders, kissed her on the cheek.
Her hormones no longer appeared to be on strike.
Chapter 14
“Guess who just slid into my DM?” Griff asked as she walked into the living room of the two-bedroom apartment Quinn shared with her.
“Your question’s too vague for me to properly answer.” Quinn was lying on the couch, scrolling through her phone.
“Mrs. Morgan Graham.”
“Oh god.” Quinn sat up a little straighter. “What does she want?”
“I think she wants you back. Look at this.” Griff showed Quinn her phone screen.
Quinn’s freezing me out. Is she okay? Can you ask her to get it in touch, please?
“Oh, please.” Quinn rolled her eyes, remembering the message Morgan had sent her earlier, which she had pretty successfully erased from her conscious mind. “She’s probably bored again. Do feel free to block her at once.”
“Have you blocked her?” Griff asked.
“No,” Quinn had to admit. “It’s hard. I don’t know why I can’t bring myself to do it.”
“How about you give me your phone and I give you mine and we block her on each other’s phone at the same time.”
Quinn laughed, although it was more out of some strange feeling of guilt than anything else. “It seems needlessly harsh.”
“What she did to you for almost four years is harsh, Quinn. You no longer giving her the time of day is the only logical consequence of how Morgan treated you.”
Quinn nodded. “I know. You’re totally right. But… aargh. It drives me nuts that I can’t just do it. Get it over with. Be done with her.”
“You loved her for a long time.” Griff held out her hand for Quinn’s phone. “Maybe you need to get back in the saddle and go on the rebound. Spend some sexy time with another woman and put some distance between yourself and all the memories you have of Morgan.”
“I haven’t come across anyone sexier than Morgan to help me with that,” Quinn said.
“You haven’t exactly been looking.”
“Maybe not.” Griff was right. Quinn hadn’t been looking. And yet. Instead of handing over her phone, Quinn scrolled to the images she had downloaded from her camera earlier. “Or maybe I have.” She showed Griff the screen.
“Uh-huh,” Griff hummed. “Looks right up your alley, girl. Who is she? A client?”
Quinn nodded. “Not just any client. I know her from before. She was my next-door neighbor in Milbury.”
“Aha. Red flag alert.” Griff peered at the screen again. “As red as that dress this woman is wearing.”
“Why a red flag?” Quinn mostly asked because she needed to be told out loud by someone she respected.
“Well, I don’t know, Quinn. If she was your neighbor, I suspect she was your family’s neighbor too. What would Brooke have to say about that? Remember how she railed against Morgan?”
“Mom would have a stroke on the spot, that’s for sure. But you just said I needed to go on the rebound…”
Quinn put her phone to the side. “What if I told you that, a long time ago, this woman and I had quite the night together?” Apart from the first few months, when she’d been dying to share the mind-blowing encounter she’d had with Maya with someone else, it hadn’t been that hard to stay silent. It had turned into a precious little secret she kept buried deep inside her, something entirely her own that only one other person in the world knew about. Seeing Maya again had changed everything.
“What do you mean?” Griff, who was a reporter, slipped into journalist mode.
“We slept together about ten years ago when I was home for the summer. My parents were away for the weekend. It felt like Maya and I were the only people left on earth. It was pretty magical, actually.”
“Hold on.” Griff set her jaw. “What happened? How old were you, for starters?”
“I was twenty-four. She was forty-five at the time.”
Griff shook her head. “Of course,” she said, her voice dripping with sarcasm.
“Oh my god, Griff. It was so amazing. Like the most heavenly dream you’ve ever had, but for real. Afterward, she made me promise not to tell anyone and I didn’t. I kept my promise. Then this afternoon, I find out she’s the new Acton Academy teacher whose portrait I’m doing.”
“No shit.” Griff blew some air out from between her teeth. “And that’s her.” Griff looked at Maya’s picture again. “Fuck, Quinn. You must be quite beside yourself right now.”
“You could say that.”
“And still you can’t bring yourself to block Morgan.”
“I should just do it now, but I’m not sure I’m in my right mind after seeing Maya again.”
“What happened when you saw her?”
“It was… lovely but also weird. She’s still as hot as she was back then and—” Quinn wasn’t sure she was allowed to share this information with someone else, but telling Griff would have no bearing whatsoever on Maya’s life. “One of the reasons she moved to New York is because she wants to date women.”