He drew in a sharp breath, half appalled at what he’d just admitted. He watched as Katie’s skin was burnished with the most beautiful blush.
But she brushed a lock of hair behind her ear and didn’t take her shy but hungry eyes off him. ‘So why are you all the way over there?’
Because he couldn’t seem to move.
Because he couldn’t quite process the depth of this.
She walked over until she was a mere breath away. ‘What do you want?’ she asked. ‘You asked me to say what I wanted. Now I’m asking you.’
His tongue was tied.
Her expression softened. ‘It’s hard, isn’t it?’
He swallowed. ‘Harder than you’d believe,’ he huffed in a lame quip.
‘I’m not going to help you with that unless you speak up.’ She smiled and leaned that little bit closer. ‘It’s only fair, Alessandro.’
She’d turned his own tease on him—except he didn’t want it to be a tease any more. The threat of denial—of her leaving him aching—felt like a whip over his heart. He curled his hands into fists. It was too intense.
‘Tell me what you want from me.’
He just wanted her. Not to forget, or escape, or soothe all his aches... He just wanted to hold her close. But it seemed he’d lost his words.
‘I...’
‘What?’
He could hardly think. He felt too hot, too broken. Her flecked eyes flashed with confusion, compassion, heat. He dropped his gaze and stared at her mouth because he couldn’t continue to drown in her eyes.
‘You want me to kiss you?’ she breathed. ‘Where?’
He didn’t care. Anywhere. He just needed her touch. ‘Accarezzami...’
She understood. She was there already. Sensations swept over him as her hands caressed him and she kissed him with her soft, sweet mouth. For one last second he stayed still, trying to hold it all back. But then it was too late.
Almost savagely he scooped her into his arms and stormed towards his bedroom to have it all.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
KATIE DIDN’T JUST say yes. She demanded more. And he didn’t let her down. He sent her into a world she’d known existed but had never dreamed she’d step into. A world of freedom and choice.
Each morning Alessandro took her to a different market—they’d scoped them out together online, part of the research he reckoned she needed to do. Laughing, but loving it, she chose ingredients, tools.
On their return to the apartment he’d shut himself in his study to work while she tested her new finds in the kitchen. A few hours later he’d emerge and taste what she’d been working on.
By then their sensual tension was too fraught to ignore. Beneath his ministrations Katie had unleashed a hidden, long-denied side of herself—the demanding side. And she had more than accepted it—she indulged it. Again and again.
Alessandro was intense, passionate and insatiable. And he held nothing back from her now. It was so intense, so physical...it was almost frantic. And it always felt fantastic.
He refused to let her cook dinner. Instead they worked their way around the finest restaurants in the city. More market research, according to Alessandro. Sometimes then they went straight home. Sometimes they went to the gilt champagne bar half a block from his apartment and met up with Vassily and Nina and a few other of his friends. It turned out that Nina owned a leisurewear company. And now Katie had pushed past her own insecurity she realised the glamorous woman was really nice—and helpful.
As the days passed she grew increasingly comfortable in her clothes, in her conversation, and with her lover. She even teased him as they talked. But the more she settled in to his lifestyle the edgier Alessandro seemed to become. More attentive. More protective. Almost possessive.
‘You guys should still be in Italy on honeymoon,’ Nina teased her suddenly as they sat together in the bar one evening.
Katie looked at her in surprise.
‘I just intercepted that look Alessandro sent you from across the room and you should definitely still be on that island, away from everybody else.’ Nina laughed. ‘Uh-oh, he’s headed this way and looking at you like you’re some tasty morsel he’s going to swallow in one mouthful.’
Katie glanced over and her gaze instantly collided with his. Electricity arced—and it wasn’t his dangerously handsome good-looks, it was the intensity in his whole demeanour, that aura of something unleashed. Tingling awareness shot to her toes as he strode over and held out his hand.
‘Bye, Nina.’ Katie shot the woman an embarrassed smile as she laced her fingers through Alessandro’s and left with him.
‘Is something wrong?’ she asked him once they were out on the pavement.
Waves of emotion rippled from him. ‘You can’t look at me like that and not expect me to react,’ he muttered.
‘You were looking at me like that!’ she laughed.
He smiled, but she still sensed tension within him. Ripples of sensuality swept through her as they walked.
‘I was jealous,’ he said gruffly.
‘I was talking to Nina!’ Katie laughed again.
‘Nina enjoys the company of attractive people, male or female. She’s fascinated by both...’
Katie laughed again, hugely amused. ‘Well, Nina is not fascinated by me. We were talking about running a business. She has a lot of experience. I can learn from her.’
‘You can learn from me,’ he pointed out with roguish arrogance as he held the apartment door for her. ‘I too have a lot of experience.’
‘As a woman in enterprise?’
He chuckled, but then his sensuality simmered over again. ‘I don’t like it when other people look at you. When other people interest you. When other people make you laugh,’ he said, pure seduction. ‘You’re my wife.’
‘So only you can advise me? Only you can make me laugh?’ she teased, placing her palm against his roughened jaw.
‘No. But only I can do this.’
He pulled her closer and kissed her.
It was no longer solace, no longer an escape. It was all ecstasy.
Katie closed her eyes and drowned in desire, denying the edge of desperation still sharpening within...
* * *
He should have known she’d surprise him. In the last week she’d blossomed. She held her own with the likes of Vassily and Nina and his other friends. She saw through their banter for what it was and threw equally teasing barbs and brilliant smiles. She’d come alive as they explored the city, trialling all kinds of creations in the kitchen...
Yet why should any of that be a surprise? She’d made a success of her sauces. She’d made those recipes. She’d picked the fruit, sold to customers. She was outstandingly capable. Just because she’d barely travelled more than twenty-miles from White Oaks, it didn’t mean she was going to be shy and socially inept.
She just hadn’t had the chance before. And now she was taking to it like a duck to water.
Yet he still felt oddly protective of her, knowing that she’d do anything for those she barely knew and everything for those she loved. Knowing that, though her smile came more readily, that rosy flush still swarmed over her skin at his touch.
She was a sweet woman who burned hotter than any other and he didn’t want her to change. But she hadn’t. She wasn’t. She’d just become more herself. She shone—beautiful, proud, confident. Part of him enjoyed the way she glittered when they were out together, and yet part of him wished he’d kept her hidden, so she was all just his.
But that wouldn’t have been fair. She’d been hidden most of her life. Kept on that old estate, starved of true freedom by a foster father determined to control her. And Alessandro couldn’t keep her for ever—life didn’t work like that.
The next night Katie spoke at length to Nina again. Alessandro watched from a distance, knowing she wa
s aware of his scrutiny. She smouldered at him from across the room. He let her tease him until he had to hustle her out before he lost control altogether.
He saw Vassily’s arched eyebrow as he whisked her away. He didn’t damn well care.
He kissed her as they were driven back to his penthouse. He didn’t make it to the bedroom—pulling her to the floor to satisfy the searing lust that overcame him. Her enthusiasm for life literally had him on his knees.
She laughed, and her emerging playfulness arrested his heart. So he worked until she screamed. And then he carried her to his bed and did it all again, until she sighed and drifted off in sated, exhausted slumber.
But he couldn’t sleep. He couldn’t shake the sensation of impending loss. It knocked against his ribcage, trying to break in and hit the block inside that was his heart. He wasn’t going to let it in.
Hours later, he was still awake. Still bothered by a worry he couldn’t define, still feeling uneasy at the intensity with which he needed to be with Katie.
Maybe he needed to restore his usual routine—he couldn’t ignore the rest of his life for ever. Katie seemed settled, happy, they were managing the moment just fine... Things could return to normal, right?
* * *
‘I need to go into the office. I’ve avoided it too long.’ Alessandro walked into the kitchen early, looking far too fine in his navy suit and tie.
‘Sure thing.’ Katie masked her disappointment with a smile. ‘I promise not to burn the place down while you’re gone.’
‘Great. Then I’ll see you later.’
She couldn’t quite look at him as he left, and their goodbye was too awkward. They weren’t anything like a normal newly married couple.
She worked in the kitchen for a while as a distraction. It wasn’t quite enough, so she phoned Susan as well.
‘Lemon filling today,’ she said, and smiled as she held the phone under chin and stirred the mixture at the same time. ‘I think it’s pretty good. I’ll bring some to you in a few days.’
‘You’ll be able to see the Madame Hardy rose that’s just bloomed.’
‘The white one?’ Katie had her head around all the herbs, but the roses not so much. And in this old familiar chat her heart ached. She missed her foster mother. ‘I can come and see you today, if you like. The train wouldn’t take—’
‘No, darling,’ her foster mother said softly. ‘You should be with your husband.’
Should she?
She knew her foster mother was as old-fashioned as the roses she grew, but Katie couldn’t understand how Susan could accept Brian’s controlling behaviour. How could she not see his lack of kindness? Katie wasn’t as forgiving. She wasn’t as accepting of...less.
Alessandro’s image flickered in her mind. She pushed down the wave of discomfort. What they were doing wasn’t less, wasn’t it?
Distractedly she ended the call to Susan, then walked through the apartment. She wished he hadn’t gone to work—she missed him a stupid amount already and he’d only been gone a few hours.
She tiptoed to his study, unable to resist her curiosity. It wasn’t as neat as she’d expected. Various folders were scattered over a table in the centre of the room. She recognised the names on some of them—buildings he owned, mostly. But then she spotted one with her name on the front. It was set to the side of the others and not hidden at all. A sticky note on the top had a reminder written on it: Get Katie to sign.
Her heart skipped a beat, then sped up. In Italy he’d said the White Oaks paperwork would be ready for her when they returned to England. She opened the cover and blinked at the number of pages inside. It wasn’t just the documents about his purchase of White Oaks. There was more—about them.
Three pages detailed all the options for declaring their marriage voidable if they wanted to seek an annulment. She glanced at the date at the bottom. It had been written the morning after their marriage. There was also a draft divorce agreement. She blinked at all the zeroes on the pay-out figure she was to receive on settlement. Cold sweat filmed her forehead. The inevitable end of their marriage was presented here with perfect clarity, in simple black and white.
Why had he wanted to do all this so soon after that hideous wedding? Why was he being so financially generous upon her release?
Because he wanted to be free and he’d needed to know the best way to proceed.
He’d never intended on going through with their marriage of convenience in the beginning. He’d only strung her along to get her far enough away from Brian for her to be able to think clearly. He’d openly admitted that. Only then they’d had that message about the engagement announcement and she’d got scared. And he’d whisked her up the aisle to stop her breaking down.
He’d given in.
He’d even given her the sex she’d wanted. He’d known she’d wanted that right from the start. No doubt an experienced man like Alessandro always knew. Besides, women always wanted sex from him.
She’d been so naive. She was his pity project—his Cinderella. He’d dressed her up, he’d taken her to parties, he’d even helped develop possibilities for her own company, had believed in her skill... He’d been soothing over all her insecurities because beneath that arrogant playboy persona he was actually a nice guy. And of course he had to protect his company, his own interests, his name. He couldn’t let this marriage fall apart too soon. He’d been keeping her happy.
But all the intimacy they’d shared was based on a sham. And it had always been going to end.
She stalked through the apartment, unable to release the frenetic energy that was coiling tightly within her. She needed to take action. She’d thought she’d escaped the restrictions of her old life, but in reality she’d ceded control of everything to Alessandro the second she’d sought him out. While he’d done all she’d asked, and then some, he’d always had his exit plan, and he’d want her to sign on the dotted line eventually.
She needed to reclaim not just her own future but her own now.
She ought to feel free. White Oaks was secure, Susan was happy and cared for, and she’d silenced Brian and knew she could now ignore him. She had everything, right?
No. Now she knew what she really wanted. A real relationship. She didn’t want to be with a man she’d bargained into marrying her. She wanted to be with someone who actually wanted her—only her—for her. That wasn’t Alessandro. He didn’t love her. She wasn’t what he wanted, and she wasn’t enough for him. She’d known that from the start, but somehow she’d forgotten for a while—he was so seductive, so good at making her feel good.
This reminder of reality hurt.
She dragged in a shivering breath. It hurt a lot.
She’d been the one to initiate that kiss in the orchard. Alessandro probably hadn’t wanted to reject her at that moment because she’d already been crying. She’d even asked him for it—for escape, for solace. He hadn’t said no because he was too kind.
And she’d asked again back at his apartment. In fact, she’d demanded. Again he’d said yes. For a moment she’d felt all that warmth and intimacy and believed in unions and love. But that didn’t mean he cared for her in any great way. No more than he cared for any other woman who’d been in his life.
The guy adored sex. He was the first to admit that. It wasn’t an expression of love, it was physical pleasure—escape and release. Even when he’d said it was different with her, he’d still meant it was only physical. Her instincts after their first time together had been right. She’d known it would mean more to her.
Anger shot through her. Why didn’t she ever get it all? Why was she never enough?
She’d not been wanted by her birth family. Not wanted by Brian. Not wanted enough by Susan for her to really fight for her...
And Alessandro would want someone else very soon.
He had no intention of this relationship lasting. He nev
er had.
She’d been starved of attention for so much of her life she’d been willing to accept anything he cared to offer her. That made her more like Susan than she’d realised. But, worse than that, she’d been like Brian too—using Alessandro, taking advantage of his innate generosity.
The realisation hurt.
She had to deal with it. She couldn’t maintain this facsimile of a marriage. Couldn’t stick around waiting for him to get bored and pull out the divorce document. No more lies, no more pretence. There had to be nothing but honesty.
Three hours later she froze halfway down the hall as she heard the door unlock.
‘Katie?’ Alessandro paused just over the threshold, a wary expression stealing over his face as he studied her. ‘What’s with the scared rabbit look? Is everything okay?’
Nothing was okay.
‘What’s happened?’ He closed the door behind him, his eyes narrowing on the overnight bag she’d placed by the entrance. ‘Are you going somewhere?’
‘I need to leave, Alessandro.’
‘Leave? Why?’ His expression sharpened. ‘Is it Susan? You need me to take you to her?’
His concern shattered her. ‘It’s not that. I can’t ever thank you enough for helping me with her. But you were right,’ she said softly. ‘I didn’t need to get married to help her. I don’t have to feel like I owe everyone everything. Not even you. I can just say no.’
‘So you’re saying no to me? To us? Just like that?’ He cleared his throat and walked towards her. ‘You’ve just decided it’s over?’
She held her hands together tightly. ‘You asked your lawyer to check the validity of our marriage.’
He checked his pace and then breathed out. ‘Is that what this is about? You looked at the paperwork?’
‘There was a lot of it. You explored all the options.’
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