by Kim Lawrence
‘What the hell are you talking about?’ he grated, looking only marginally more in control than she did.
‘I’m not fit to be a mother. I haven’t forgotten what you said. Well, if you think I’m going to let you take this child away from me, you’re wrong! Just because you have money it doesn’t mean you can buy everything.’ Furiously she wiped the tears from her cheeks with the back of her hand. ‘Oh, pass me a tissue, will you?’
Callum produced a handkerchief from his pocket and sat down on the edge of the bed. ‘Calm down,’ he said gently. ‘I don’t think it can be good for you to get so upset.’
‘You’re the one trying to steal my baby.’
He blotted the dampness from her cheeks and looked at her with a curious expression she didn’t understand. ‘You really do want this baby, don’t you? I accept that. I don’t know where you’ve got these ludicrous notions about me separating you. But it’s my child too and you can’t cut me off. It’s in both our interests to behave in a civilised fashion so don’t force me to play rough, Georgina.’
‘Is that a threat?’ she asked hoarsely.
Callum made an impatient gesture. ‘Nothing so dramatic. I’m not Simon May,’ he said caustically. ‘You’ve no right to attempt to keep me from my child. As things stand, you’ll need help.
‘Just shut up and listen,’ he continued sternly, cutting off her protests. ‘Who else is there? Simon May?’ His expression hardened. ‘You’ve got to agree not to see him again. A man who hits a woman never changes,’ he observed with biting scorn. ‘Did he think the child was his?’ he asked thickly.
‘I don’t care what he thinks, or what you think!’ she yelled back.
‘Did you know he’s been selling information to our main rival?’
Georgina just looked at him blankly. She couldn’t believe he could actually think she was interested in the man. ‘Has he?’ she said flatly. Simon May was low on her agenda of interesting subjects.
‘He got the push today, and he probably found out that our rivals are less keen on employing someone who’s already sold out one employer than he imagined. I expect you took the full force of his frustration. Keep away from him!’ he warned grimly. His gaze rested on the swollen, discoloured area across her jaw and he grimaced. ‘Even if you don’t have enough self-respect to know he’s bad news, you’ve got to think about the baby. I’ll have no compunction about making sure you don’t keep it if you put its life in danger.’
‘How dare you lecture me on responsibility?’ she breathed wrathfully. His contemptuous assumption made her blood boil. He seemed to think she was in the middle of some torrid affair. If it hadn’t been so offensive it would have been funny! ‘You weren’t very responsible when we conceived this child. Besides, I’m seven months pregnant. I hardly think my love life is something that need concern you.’
‘You’re a very sensual woman and being pregnant hasn’t altered that,’ he said in a clipped tone. ‘I believe some women even find their appetites increase at these times.’ The light in his blue eyes as they ran almost compulsively over her made her heart thud. ‘I think you look beautiful and desirable.’
He raised his hand to his forehead and closed his eyes. She saw the muscles in his throat work as he swallowed. ‘You’d better sleep, Georgina,’ he said heavily, getting up. He scribbled down a number on a pad and ripped off the paper. ‘If you need anything ring me. I’ll contact your mother and let her know what’s going on.’
Callum took charge and Georgina was in no position to argue. The room was filled with fresh flowers every day, a gesture which might have meant something if she hadn’t been convinced that Mary did this on his behalf.
He’d gained an ally in her mother, whom he’d housed in a luxurious hotel for the duration of her daughter’s stay in hospital. Lydia visited her every day and was full of praise for him. She couldn’t understand her daughter’s stubborn rejection of the father of her child. In her opinion Callum was everything any woman could wish for and the way she dropped heavy hints concerning weddings when he was present made Georgina want to curl up and die from pure embarrassment.
What could she say? That he’d tricked her and she’d thought he was an escort hired by the hour? She couldn’t defend her behaviour to anyone else when she still found it inexplicable. She still had some pride left! Despite Callum’s reassurances she felt uneasy, convinced he wanted this child minus its mother.
Callum came every day, the perfect, attentive father, and only Georgina knew how deceptive appearances were. The last evening of her stay they sat in uncomfortable silence for half an hour. She gazed blankly at the pages of a glossy magazine, giving monosyllabic replies to all of his attempts to start a conversation.
‘Cut it out, Georgina,’ he said suddenly, removing the magazine from her fingers. ‘You’ve proved your point—you don’t like me,’ he said heavily. He sat on the edge of the bed, his expression grave. ‘I think it’s time you started acting like a grown-up and thought about the future. We’ve got to put aside personal feeling and animosity and consider the child. He or she has to be the first consideration.’
Georgina’s belligerent expression faded. The future was still something that frightened her. She hadn’t wanted to think beyond the safety of the hospital bed.
‘My childhood was disrupted by the wranglings of my parents. My mother never once stopped to think what effect her behaviour had on me. Even if Dad had taken the matter as far as court, in those days it was inevitable that the mother was given custody, unless the circumstances were extraordinary. Things are different now.’
‘What are you trying to say?’ she asked, going deathly pale. I should have known, she thought, swinging her legs over the side of the bed; he wants the baby without me. . .the unfit mother.
‘What the hell are you doing?’ he said, his fingers closing around her ankles. He lifted her legs back onto the bed and regarded her as if she’d taken leave of her senses.
‘I won’t let you take this baby away from me,’ she said huskily, drawing her ankles up, away from the contact with his fingers.
Callum’s mouth tightened as he surveyed her pale, tense features. ‘I wasn’t talking about taking the child away, Georgina.’
She eyed him with distrust. ‘You were quite voluble about my unfitness to be a mother.’
‘One look at your face when you thought you were losing the baby was enough to make me realise I was wrong,’ he said roughly.
Georgina stared at him in amazement. She could see he resented the admission, but at least he’d made it. Still, she wouldn’t lower her defences.
‘I was trying to say that a child needs a secure environment,’ he continued. ‘The last thing I’d subject any child of mine to would be being a pawn in a parental power game. A child needs both parents.’
Georgina trembled. What was he suggesting? ‘A child wouldn’t feel very secure with parents who actively disliked one another. You’re not suggesting we stay together for the sake of the baby?’ Her voice rose in shrill incredulity. ‘My parents tried that for me, with painful consequences. ’
‘We’re talking about us, not your parents. It seems the logical solution.’
‘Who is refusing to learn from history now?’ she accused him. It hurt that he could sound so pragmatic. Constantly required to live a lie...no, she couldn’t bear it! ‘It’s an insane idea.’
Tm not suggesting marriage,’ he said, visibly impatient at her uncooperative attitude.
‘Should I be grateful for small mercies?’ she asked hoarsely.
‘Save the sarcasm, Georgina,’ he said, his face tight with anger. ‘We’ve made a life between us and we have to adjust our own accordingly.’
Even if it didn’t suit him, she added silently. He wanted this child and she went with it. Feeling as she did, she couldn’t risk constant exposure to him.
‘You might find it’s not so bad as you think,’ he observed drily as he stared at her pale, drawn face. ‘It would be hard for y
ou as a single parent.’
‘I’ve sold the shares Oliver left me,’ she said, fighting against the moral blackmail he was so subtly applying. If she disagreed with him, she didn’t have the baby’s best interests at heart. If she did agree...wasn’t there the possibility she wanted to agree just to stay close to him? ‘I’ll have more than a lot of single parents.’
‘You should have waited a couple of months,’ he said, his expression showing distaste at the mention of her inheritance. ‘You’d have made more profit.’
Not as bad as she thought? It could only be worse! she thought wildly, not really hearing what he was saying. Not least because, to some self-destructive corner of her mind, the prospect of seeing him frequently was incredibly attractive. I’m pathetic, she thought, sick with self-disgust.
‘I’ll be back at work soon.’ The logistics of that prospect were so mind-bogglingly difficult that she didn’t feel any of the certainty expressed in her voice.
‘If you’re so anxious to continue your career, all the more reason to involve me. I can make it a lot easier for you to carry on up the slippery pole.’
‘I can get where I want to be on my own merit.’
‘An attitude which does you credit,’ he said, his lip curling with contemptuous disbelief. She flushed at the implied insult. ‘One way or another, Georgina, I will be part of this child’s life. I make a bad enemy.’ Smooth as a knife-thrust, his words slid home.
She shivered; when he spoke like that it was hard to believe that everything he said wouldn’t come to pass simply through the indomitable force of his will.
‘You can’t want to play happy families, Callum.’
‘I want to do whatever I have to to give this child a stable environment,’ he said heavily.
She stiffened as his hand reached out to cover her abdomen in a powerfully possessive gesture. The strange sensation that hit her made her feel light-headed. She had felt isolated lately by the things that were taking place in her own body. His touch made it feel as if she was sharing them for the first time. It wasn’t entirely unpleasant, she realised as she lifted her dazed eyes to his face.
‘You need me, Georgina; why is it so hard to admit it?’ His blue eyes blazed with an intense emotion that she couldn’t quite decipher. ‘She moved.’ His hands suddenly jerked clear.
‘It’s all right,’ she said, catching his hand and guiding it back to her belly. ‘You seem sure it’s a girl.’
Callum’s eyes gleamed with satisfaction at her instinctive gesture. ‘I think she is,’ he agreed softly. ‘Let me look after you now?’
A frown between her brows, she lifted her troubled eyes to his. ‘And later?’
‘We’ll work something out,’ he promised. ‘Take things one step at a time. Surely two intelligent people can come to a compromise?’
The trouble was, she reflected, that one of those intelligent people was in love, and being in love seemed to cancel out any claim to intellect that she’d ever possessed.
Despite her severe misgiving she found herself nodding. What alternative was there? She did have the baby to consider—about that much at least Callum was right. How long would it be before Callum discovered how she really felt about him? She shuddered to think how vulnerable that would make her. Well, I’ll just have to make very sure he never finds out, she decided.
CHAPTER NINE
GEORGINA ARGUED but Callum appeared to have thought of every conceivable objection she might make to going with him to France. He managed to make every protest she made sound unreasonable and churlish. The trouble was that, practically speaking, he was right—she did need looking after. Her obstetrician had personally recommended a doctor in Montpellier, thus ruining her last remaining objection. She was passed fit to make the short journey and the wheels were set in motion.
‘I seem to be the one making all the concessions here,’ Georgina observed rattily as she perused the menu in the small café Callum had insisted they stop at on the journey from the airport. ‘I can’t even speak French.’
‘You sound so British sometimes,’ Callum observed with a faint smile.
‘I should...I am—insular and uncompromising, that’s me,’ she replied, cheerfully selecting her meal and ordering in faltering French.
‘Who am I to argue? Still, you managed that adequately so at least you won’t starve,’ he said drily, having ordered his own food in a much more fluent fashion.
‘Ordering food is one thing, having a baby when no one understands what I’m saying is another.’
‘A large proportion of the staff at the clinic speak English. We’ve been through all this, Georgina. I’ve arranged for a midwife to move in with us for the last two weeks.’
She made a disgruntled sound in her throat. Yes, he’d been pretty comprehensive in his assumption that she was not capable of taking care of herself. ‘I won’t have anyone I know,’ she complained, giving full range to the surge of self-pity.
‘Your mother can stay; I’ve told you that. Besides, you’ll know me.’
‘Pardon me for not feeling comforted,’ she snapped, her attention straying to a French family at a neighbouring table. Four generations, ranging from a septuagenarian to a toddler, settled down to eat together. She doubted whether children would have been welcomed quite so automatically in the British equivalent of this establishment.
‘My mother is the last person I’d want at the birth,’ she observed wistfully. Lydia had already advised Georgina to opt for the highest-tech birth available and her tales of her own horrifying experience were hardly designed to soothe her daughter’s worries.
‘Then, as I said, you’ll have to do with me.’
She gave him a startled look. ‘You want to be in at the birth?’ She hadn’t expected that and wasn’t exactly sure how she felt about it. Callum was so possessive about the growing life within her that she almost felt jealous sometimes.
Longingly she wondered what it would be like to come under the cloak of his love. He was protective—extremely protective—but she knew this was only because she was carrying the child...his child. She didn’t want to acknowledge the wave of emotion that washed over her. She’d be living in a fool’s paradise if she read what she wanted to into his decision.
He raised his dark brows and shrugged. ‘Of course I do.’
‘But it’s...intimate,’ she said, struggling to express her doubts, suddenly fiercely embarrassed.
‘So was the conception, as I recall,’ he returned drily. ‘Or does your memory need refreshing? I’m not playing at being a father, Georgina—I’m committed to the prospect.’
But not to me. She confronted the hurtful thought; sometimes it was only by remembering this painful truth that she could acknowledge the real situation between them. The knowledge that there was little about that night she’d ever forget made her colour and shift in her seat. ‘I hardly think you’d enjoy that in my present condition,’ she snapped, her jaw clenched.
‘On the contrary, I’d enjoy it very much, but the doctor tells me that’s a no-go area for the duration.’
‘Why did he tell you that?’ she asked in a scandalised voice. She knew, but he had no right telling Callum, she concluded with shaky logic.
‘Because I asked.’
‘You ask...!’ Georgina choked. She was very grateful for the arrival of their food.
‘Try this; it’s a sort of chestnut casserole, a local speciality,’ he explained, holding out his fork for her to sample the dish. ‘Like it?’ he enquired as she obligingly opened her mouth.
‘Very nice,’ she said primly, applying herself to her chicken dish. She realised that the casual gesture would have appeared intimate to anyone watching them. The problem was that it was intimate, just the two of them. She had no illusions he must resent her intrusion into his life; he was making the best of an impossible situation. ‘I still don’t see why I couldn’t have stayed in England; you could have visited me there.’
Everything had happened so fast. If
only she had been able to convince him she didn’t need him, but the unpalatable fact was that she did. The doctor’s tone had been alarming but the restrictions he had listed had been daunting.
‘You’re really tetchy,’ Callum observed drily. ‘Was the journey too much?’ A crease of anxiety indented his forehead and his eyes searched her face intently. ‘It’s only an hour’s drive to Ca’n D’alt, but we could stop here overnight if you prefer.’
‘I’m fine,’ she assured him. The flight to Toulouse had been smooth and the drive out of the city hadn’t been taxing. Callum had made frequent stops for her to stretch her legs.
‘I want to be involved with this child from the outset,’ he said quietly. ‘I don’t want to be a weekend parent.’
‘What about me—doesn’t it matter what I want?’ she asked in frustration.
‘You need someone to make sure you slow down—’
‘Nag me,’ she interrupted mutinously. She had no intention of letting anything put her child at risk, no matter what he thought.
‘For all I know you might have run back to May once the bruises had faded.’
Her lips remained firmly pressed together but her eyes flared with anger. ‘That’s my business,’ she said coldly.
‘Tell me about him.’
The perplexing order made her stare at him in confusion. ‘I don’t know what you mean.’
‘I mean does he have a whole host of charming characteristics which are only apparent on closer acquaintance? You’d know all about them, wouldn’t you, having such a close relationship? Or do you simply have a deeply masochistic streak? Are you attracted to brutes?’ His voice was icy with derision.
‘I never said I was having an affair with Simon—you did,’ she reminded him.
‘And are you telling me you weren’t? Why else would you have been meeting him in the car park? That was hardly a chance encounter.’
‘What’s wrong—was your ego bruised at the idea of me hopping from your bed into someone else’s?’ she asked harshly. She had no intention of justifying herself to him when all he did was insult her. ‘I thought you’d already decided I’d slept my way through the entire male staff at Mallory’s,’ she said bitterly.