by Laura Iding
When she’d been with James, he’d always included her in all family outings. She could look back now and realize he’d used her more or less as a surrogate mother for his sons. They really hadn’t had very much alone time as a couple. Which hadn’t exactly helped their personal relationship. Was it any wonder they’d grown apart? Was it any wonder he’d fallen in love with someone else?
She should be glad that Dan wasn’t doing the same thing. Obviously, he’d made love to her last night because he’d wanted to. He’d arranged for a babysitter so he could take her to a lovely dinner. So why did she still feel left out?
Determined to stop wallowing in self-pity, she headed over to see her parents. They always had a standing Sunday brunch invitation and today she’d surprise everyone by stopping by.
Twenty-five minutes later she arrived at her parents’ place and wasn’t entirely surprised to find Sally and Mike there, as well.
“Molly, it’s so good to see you,” her mother said, giving her a big hug. She clung to her mother for a long minute, before letting go to hug her father.
“It’s good to see you, too,” she said, hoping they didn’t notice the dampness around her eyes. “Hi, Sally, Mike. How are your wedding plans coming along?”
“Wonderful!” Sally said, as they gathered in the kitchen. “We have our church and the hall picked out.”
“Really? And when’s the big day?” Molly helped herself to a glass of orange juice.
“August twenty-first. We were lucky that the hall had a cancelation.”
“Wow, that’s only a few months away,” she murmured. Obviously the wedding plans had been going on for quite a while.
“Food’s ready,” her mother called.
Even though the conversation centered around Sally and Mike’s upcoming wedding, Molly was glad to be here, surrounded by her family. For a brief time she didn’t feel so much like an outsider.
Although she couldn’t help thinking about Dan and Josh. Wondering how they were spending their day. Had they gone to another movie after their trip to the park? Or had they gone back to Fun and Games?
It was ridiculous to keep thinking about them when she’d see them both the following morning.
She stayed at her parents’ house as long as she could, before heading back home.
There was no message from Dan waiting for her, and she wondered if he’d regretted spending the night with her.
Had he said those nice things to her at dinner just to get her into bed? Had she been hopelessly naive to believe him? Her stomach clenched as she couldn’t help thinking the worst, especially as it was clear that he hadn’t followed through with his promise to call.
It was her fault for getting emotionally involved with Dan in the first place. And it would be up to her to get over him, the same way she’d managed to get over James.
One painful day at a time.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
DAN CALLED MOLLY a half-dozen times, but when she didn’t answer he hung up before her machine kicked in. He didn’t want to leave a message. After the way he’d been forced to leave earlier that morning, she deserved better than to hear him say “I’m thinking of you” on a machine.
Leaving her warm bed had been one of the hardest things he’d ever done. If not for Josh being home with Mitch, he would have stayed longer. The rest of the weekend, if she’d have let him.
He ran his hands over his hair and told himself Molly wouldn’t hold being a single father against him. After all, she loved kids. She understood that he’d needed to get home for Josh.
So why did he feel as if he’d let her down?
After he’d returned home, he’d caught another couple of hours of sleep before the rest of the household had gotten up. Once they’d eaten breakfast, Mitch had left to return home and he’d decided to celebrate the mild weather by taking Josh down to Central Park. They’d both used their wheelchairs, much to Josh’s amusement.
As much as he tried to spend quality father-and-son time with Josh, he’d often become distracted by thoughts of Molly. He couldn’t remember the last time a woman had dominated his thoughts.
Suzy didn’t count as she’d once dominated his thoughts in a bad way. Molly’s fresh laughter was the complete antithesis of Suzy’s bitterness.
Yet he was forced to admit that maybe some of his ex’s bitterness had been justified. He had worked a lot of hours. He could have spent more time with her. At the time he’d thought maybe he simply wasn’t capable of love.
But being with Molly and Josh proved that theory to be false. He loved Josh. And he cared deeply for Molly. He knew she cared, at least a little, about him, too.
Maybe he wasn’t so unlovable after all.
Once they’d returned home from Central Park, he spent some time working on Josh’s surprise birthday party, and he called Molly again.
This time she answered. “Hello?”
“Finally we get to talk,” he said. “I’ve been getting your machine most of the day.”
“Really? Why didn’t you leave a message?”
“Because I wanted to talk to you.” And now that he was talking to her, his nerves settled down. He took the phone into the other room, out of Josh’s hearing. “How are you? What have you been up to?”
“Had brunch with my parents, ran a few errands. The usual.”
Was it his imagination or did she seem to be a tiny bit standoffish? Was she upset with him? “I wish I could have stayed with you this morning,” he murmured. “I wish you were here right now.”
There was a moment of silence before she spoke again. “I’ve been thinking of you, too.”
The admission made him feel better. “I’d like to see you again. Soon.”
“You and Josh are coming to therapy in the morning, aren’t you?” she asked in a teasing tone.
“Yes. But what I meant is that I want to see you alone. Maybe we can do dinner one night this week?”
Another small silence and he wished she were here in front of him so he could read her facial expressions. He didn’t like having to second-guess her thoughts. “I don’t know if that will work. I generally try not to stay up too late on work nights.”
Was she really worried about getting up for work in the morning? Or was she trying to put distance between them? “How about Friday night, then? Josh’s party is on Saturday and it would be easier if you just stayed here overnight. You can sleep in the spare bedroom, if you’re worried about Josh being here.”
“Hmm, let me think about that,” she said evasively. “Speaking of Josh’s birthday, how is the party planning coming along?”
“Great.” He injected enthusiasm into his voice when really just the thought of being in charge of all those kids was as daunting as hell. “Most of the kids in his class have responded that they’re coming, which makes me feel better.”
“Oh, Dan, that’s great news.” Molly’s excitement was contagious. “Josh is going to have a wonderful time, you’ll see.”
“And he’ll owe it all to you for coming up with the idea.” He gripped the phone tighter and wished once again she was there with him. Especially when she laughed softly.
“No, you need to take the credit for having this party, not me. After all, you’re doing all the work.” There was a brief silence, and then she added, “I have to get going. See you tomorrow, Dan.”
“All right. See you tomorrow, Molly.” He disconnected the call, wondering how he was going to manage to wait unt
il Friday night to be alone with her again.
* * *
Molly did her best to keep things on a professional level when she saw Josh and Dan the following morning. She was already too close to falling for him, and didn’t want to make the same mistakes she’d made in the past. But it wasn’t easy when Dan stood close, his arm lightly brushing hers.
She eased away, concentrating on Josh. “Wow, you’re doing very well, Josh. Look at how high you can kick your feet!”
Josh beamed. “We’ve been practicing, right, Dad?”
“Right,” Dan agreed.
She was glad, very glad that the two of them were so comfortable around each other now. A far cry from their first day of therapy, that’s for sure. She went through her list of warm-up games, and then decided it was time to move onto the next step.
“Okay, now we’re going to try to stand again,” she said, gesturing for Josh to follow her in his wheelchair over to the small platform nestled between parallel bars. “Are you ready, Freddie?”
Josh giggled, as she’d hoped he would. “I’m not Freddie,” he said, as he set the brakes on his wheelchair.
“Are you sure? Because you look like a Freddie.” She was proud at how bravely he faced the challenge of standing. His leg muscles were getting stronger, but they still had a way to go before he would be walking again.
Although there wasn’t any doubt in her mind that he would accomplish that task.
“Wait for me,” she said quickly, when Josh pushed up on the padded armrests of his wheelchair. His upper-arm strength had grown by leaps and bounds since Dan had agreed to let him use a wheelchair. “Steady now,” she warned, as he stood up on his own two feet.
Josh didn’t say anything, his face scrunched up with fierce concentration. She put her elbow under his armpit and took some of his weight.
“I can do it myself,” he said testily.
“Okay.” She eased back, allowing him to support his own weight but staying close by in case he lost his balance.
“Look, Dad,” Josh said excitedly when he managed to grip the parallel bars and balance between them. “I can stand!”
“You sure can, Josh,” Dan said in a husky voice. Molly didn’t dare take her eyes off Josh to look over at him, but she knew he had to be thrilled with Josh’s progress.
“How are your legs feeling?” she asked. His muscles were quivering beneath the strain, but he seemed determined to stay upright.
“Fine,” he claimed, although the quivering got worse.
She waited a full minute before stepping forward. “Okay, Josh, let’s have you sit back down, slow and easy.”
He didn’t argue this time, and soon he was seated once again in his wheelchair.
Dan came over and crouched beside Josh. “I’m so proud of you, Josh. Your hard work is really paying off. The way your leg muscles are getting stronger is nothing short of amazing.”
“Thanks, Dad,” Josh said, throwing his arms around his father’s neck and squeezing tightly.
Molly had to blink back tears, watching the way father and son clung to each other. And then Josh pulled back and glanced up at Molly. “Is it time for the massage yet?” he asked.
She had to laugh. “I suspect that’s your favorite part of the day,” she teased, as she headed over to the table set up near the ultrasound machine. “Either that or you just want to get through the rest of your therapy so that you can pick out a lollipop.”
“I’m betting it’s both,” Dan said with a broad smile.
As she started her massage Dan’s cell phone rang. He glanced at the screen, frowned and then glanced at her. “My colleague Marcus,” he said, before he left the room to take the call.
She wondered why Marcus was calling. Did he have a question about patient care? Did they often talk about their respective patients?
Dan was still on the phone when she finished with Josh’s massage and then moved on to the ultrasound treatments. She’d finished one leg and had started on the other when he finally returned, his expression grim.
“Problems?” she asked.
“Sort of. There’s apparently a particularly challenging patient who needs surgery,” he admitted.
She sensed he didn’t want to talk in front of Josh, so she refrained from asking more as she finished up the ultrasound treatments. “All finished,” she said cheerfully, as she put the machine away and began scraping the gel from Josh’s legs. “Are you ready for a lollipop?”
Josh nodded and then contemplated the flavors left in the candy jar. “Grape,” he said, pulling out the last one. He wasted no time in tearing off the purple wrapper and popping the candy in his mouth.
“Molly, do you have a minute?” Dan asked in a low voice.
“Sure.” She turned to Josh. “I’ll be right back, okay?”
Josh nodded, sucking on his lollipop with such force that his cheeks were sunk in, making him look like a fish.
“What’s wrong?” she asked, the moment they were alone.
“I need to return to work,” Dan said. “I was planning to be off this week, but unfortunately this patient can’t wait.”
She hid her dismay, knowing better than to ask for specifics. “Who will bring Josh to therapy?”
“Gemma, his nanny, or maybe Mitch.” Dan blew out a breath and shook his head. “You need to understand that I wouldn’t make a decision like this lightly. This patient needs my expertise, or I wouldn’t cut my leave of absence short.”
Deep down, she wanted to ask why Marcus couldn’t do the surgery, but she managed to hold her tongue. After all, what Dan chose to do wasn’t really her business.
One night together didn’t mean much in the big scheme of things.
“Just make sure you keep spending time with Josh,” she said lightly. “Because he needs a father as much as your patients need a top-notch surgeon.”
“I know. Watching him stand was amazing. After the accident...” He paused then cleared his throat before continuing, “I don’t know if I’d be able to forgive myself for that brief moment of inattentiveness just before the crash.”
“Oh, Dan, it’s not your fault,” she soothed, trying to make him understand. “Your car was T-boned because the other driver ran a red light.” She remembered reading about the crash in the newspaper. Scary stuff.
“Thanks for saying that,” he murmured. He stared at her for a long moment, as if he wanted to say something more, but then turned away. She followed him back to where Josh was already waiting for them in his wheelchair.
“Goodbye, Josh, I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Bye, Molly.” Josh waved cheerfully, before following his father out of the door. She watched them leave, wondering what Josh’s reaction would be once he discovered his father was planning to return to work.
Her heart ached for him. And for herself.
Because she couldn’t help being afraid that once Dan was fully entrenched back in his old life, he’d revert back to his old ways. Being stern and serious, rather than taking the time to enjoy life. Yet he’d promised to maintain his relationship with his son, so she tried to take comfort in that thought.
Of course Josh would always come first. Which was the way it should be. And if he didn’t have time for her, then obviously a relationship between them wasn’t meant to be.
* * *
Dan went to the hospital early on Tuesday morning, and it seemed strange to walk through the lobby of Angel’s after being gone for so long. His long wh
ite coat flapped against his thighs as he quickened his pace to reach the elevator.
He hurried up to the labor and delivery unit, where a pregnant woman was about to give birth to a baby with tetralogy of Fallot, a birth defect in which the infant’s heart was essentially turned backward in its tiny chest. Normally this type of condition required surgery at some point during the baby’s first year of life, but in this instance the unborn baby had been diagnosed with an additional complication, hydroplastic pulmonary arteries, which required bypass surgery to assist in oxygenating the infant’s lungs. In years past these babies died, but now they could be operated on as soon as the infant was born and these children were now living well into their thirties and beyond.
The biggest catch was that the complex bypass procedure had to be started as soon as the baby was born or the child would die. And it was easily a ten- to twelve-hour procedure.
When he arrived in the labor and delivery suite, there was already a group of physicians and nurses filling the room. One of the nurses noticed him. “The cardiothoracic surgeon is here,” she announced.
“Good. Nice to see you again, Dan. If everyone is ready, let’s get this show on the road,” Rebecca Kramer said briskly, pushing forward the gurney with the pregnant mother.
Rebecca Kramer was one of the neonatology experts on staff at Angel’s and they’d worked together before, but there wasn’t time for small talk as Dan could tell by the fetal monitor tracing that the baby was in trouble. They’d planned this C-section early, and it was obviously a good thing as it seemed the baby would have been born today, regardless. He made several phone calls of his own, making sure the O.R. right next to the one that Rebecca would use was equipped with what he’d need for long, grueling open-heart surgery.
“I want to see my baby,” the pregnant woman sobbed, as they wheeled her into the O.R. suite. “I want to see her, to hold her in my arms before she has surgery.”
Dan was used to this request, and had to steel his heart against her pleading gaze. He glanced at her name on her hospital bracelet. “I’m sorry, Mrs. Thompson, but your baby girl won’t live if we wait,” he said gently. “Have you chosen a name for her yet?”