Losing It All

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Losing It All Page 34

by Wilde, Kati


  “Oh my god, Stone.” It’s a gasping moan. “You feel huge inside me.”

  My dick would be swelling up bigger because of that if I’d had a chance to soften her up. Instead I make sure she still doesn’t need me to.

  “Hurting?” I rasp.

  Wordlessly Maxine shakes her head, panting as she swivels her hips again, stirring my cock deep within her sultry depths. Pleasure surges the length of my dick like lightning that strikes again and again when she begins to ride. Slow and shallow, not rising up and down but sinuously rocking back and forth, her tight entrance working the base of my shaft while her inner walls suck and pull at every aching inch. Breath hissing through gritted teeth, I fight the orgasm that’s building, all that need and heat stacking up like a brick wall that I’m trying so damn hard not to slam into. She’s going to wreck me. Wreck me so bad. But I won’t slow her down. Not if this is what Maxine needs.

  But what she needs must not be what she’s getting, because her hair trigger’s not going off. Through all that bliss, frustration tightens her expression. She leans forward with her hands still braced on my chest, her hips still circling but her eyes squeezing closed and her teeth digging into her bottom lip. Then she just fucking kills me with a pained whimper, like she’s reaching for something she can’t touch.

  “Tell me what you need, Maxine.” Because I need to give it to her.

  “I’m not tall enough,” she pants. “Will you sit up so I can kiss you again?”

  Fuck yes. I jack up to sitting, dragging my shirt over my head as I go. She gasps, moaning as the change in position pushes me deeper. Her body’s shaking when I wrap my arm tight around her waist. My other hand grips her ass, begins lifting and lowering her onto my cock, making sure her clit’s rubbing up against me just right.

  “Want me to help out here, too?” I ask with my mouth against hers.

  Her breaths trembling, she nods. “I love it when you hold me like this.”

  “Like what?” I’ll make sure to always do it.

  “When you’re inside me, and you hold me against you so tight. Like you won’t let me go until you’re done getting what you need.”

  “If it means being done, then I ain’t ever letting you go,” I tell her gruffly.

  Maxine makes a soft sound like something inside her crumples, then she’s kissing me again, her mouth hungry and fierce. She slicks her hot tongue over mine and I’m done for, just fucking done for, barely holding back as I drag her up the length of my erection and grind her back down, rubbing up into her real good each time.

  Christ, I ain’t going to last. Ain’t gonna last even another minute.

  Raw lust clenches hard at the base of my spine. She’s quaking against me, gasping and moaning into our kiss—then going still as her cunt constricts around my aching flesh tight enough to make my head explode. Groaning into her mouth, I fuck into her as she comes, and that goddamn miracle of a pussy destroys the last of my control, my release pumping out of me with every thrust.

  But though my hips slow, I can’t stop kissing her. It’s Maxine who draws back a little, face flushed and her gaze searching mine—looking painfully shy and hesitant, though my cock’s still buried in her cunt and I still haven’t let her go. Though I made it clear I ain’t ever going to.

  “What is it you’re needing now, angel? I’ll give it.”

  Still she looks uncertain, and her reply is barely a husk of sound. “Is it… Is it okay if I touch you?”

  Because she hasn’t. All the while I’ve been kissing her, Maxine’s hands have been fisted at her thighs. Even when she braced her palms on my chest, riding me, I was wearing my shirt. The rest of the time, she’s been so damn careful not to touch my skin. Because I told her never to.

  So she never has.

  My heart fills with hot lead and I wonder if I’ll ever pay enough for all I did to her. My angel. My wife. All this time, believing I don’t want her touch, when the truth is there’s not a fucking thing in this world that I want more.

  Voice raw, I tell her, “I’d love it if you touched me.”

  A smile bursts across her face but as she lifts her trembling fingers to my jaw, the uncertainty doesn’t vanish. “But let me know if my hands are too cold, okay?”

  “Ah fuck, Maxine, no,” I groan as the hot lead in my chest turns to agony, catching her hand and bringing it to my lips, wishing I could unsay every fucking thing I ever said. She’s not just thinking I don’t want her to touch me but that I’m also revolted by her touch? Like a dead fish. Christ, I don’t deserve her. Don’t deserve anything from her. “I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. You were an angel to me in the barn and I shit all over you, because every time you touched me, it felt so damn good. But I didn’t want to feel good, not after Crash. And I sure as hell didn’t deserve to.”

  Her smile becomes tremulous. “What about now?”

  “I’m not in the same place.” I still don’t deserve her, but I’m sure as fuck never going to push her away again. “Now all I care about is what you need, Maxine—and what’ll make you feel good. Nah, fuck. Good ain’t good enough. So you tell me what’s going to make you feel better than you did just a bit ago, because it seemed for a while there, you were having trouble chasing your come. Was there something missing? Or was it just thinking that I don’t want you to touch me?”

  Pink washes over her cheeks. “Nothing was missing. You felt so good. It was just…” Tentatively, she traces her fingers along my jaw, and her breath shudders when I turn my head to press a kiss into her palm. “I kept wanting you to take me like you used to. In the cabin.”

  I can’t be hearing that right. “When I used you as a fuckhole?”

  Her blush deepens, but she nods. “Because I know you’re a good man. But you needed me so much, you crossed that line into bad. Didn’t you?”

  “I crossed a hell of a line. One I shouldn’t have.”

  “Why? I said you could.” She bites her lip, her eyes searching mine. “You think that makes you the same as Tusk?”

  Thinking he was owed something. “Pretty fucking close, yeah.”

  “You’re not. The difference there is that I wanted you, too. And if I’d said no instead of yes, would you have stopped?”

  “In an instant. But—”

  “Because you’re a good man,” she says softly. “Did you ever cross that line with anyone else? Would you ever?”

  Fuck, she’s killing me. “No.”

  “So it was just me.”

  “Yeah.”

  “You think I don’t know that?” She cups my face in her warm hands. “You think it wasn’t thrilling to be wanted like that, knowing you were breaking all your own rules? Maybe that’s my own bad coming out, too.”

  “No, angel,” I say gruffly. “There’s not a bit of bad in you.”

  “You sure? Because I liked you crossing that line. I liked you taking me as if you intended to collect what you were owed. All because you needed me so much.” She looks suddenly vulnerable, her emerald eyes huge and dark. “Do you still?”

  Need her as much as I did then? Hell no.

  I need her more than I ever have.

  “You have no fucking idea, angel,” I tell her, my voice roughening with every word. “I’ll cross every goddamn line to have you. To take what’s mine. You want me to show you?”

  Maxine’s breath shudders as she nods, her eyes closing in relief—as if she wasn’t certain what my answer to needing her would be.

  So I’ll make sure there isn’t any doubt left.

  “Go put on that wedding dress, then.” I squeeze her ass before letting her go. “And I’ll fuck you like I should have when I carried you in.”

  She kisses me hard before scrambling off my lap and snatching the dress from the closet. After coming, my dick’s softened up some, but I ain’t worried about that. By the time I’m ready to get into her again, I’ll be aching just as much as I ever was. Maybe more. Because Maxine, god help me…she’s just so damn sweet. So damn beaut
iful as she tosses me a blushing look before heading into bathroom.

  I head over, bracing my hands on the doorframe so I’ll be the first thing my wife sees when she comes out again. She must not have done more than clean up a bit, because in no time at all, that door swings open and she’s there in front of me, wearing a silky white dress that I barely even see because the woman in it is such a vision.

  Christing hell, she’s stunning. It thumps me right in the chest how gorgeous my bride is, looking up at me with her green eyes alight with anticipation.

  “You’re so fucking pretty, Maxine,” I tell her huskily. “Maybe I ought to put that tux back on, too.”

  She shakes her head, her fingers tucking into the waist of my jeans—which I zipped up but didn’t do much more in the way of fastening. “This suits you better,” she says softly.

  So it does. But not as well as having this woman against me.

  Now that I know she loves it when I hold her close, I snake my arm around her waist and draw her in tight. “Kiss me again like you did after they said ‘man and wife.’”

  With a delighted laugh, she throws her arms around my neck and rises onto her toes. That didn’t happen in the chapel, but the happiness shining from her face is the same. So is the painful clench in my chest as I claim her mouth, long and slow and sweet. But the pain before came from believing that kiss was the only time I’d ever be touching her again. Now the ache comes from all the hope building up until my heart’s as tight and as full as it’s ever been—along with a hefty punch of terror, fearing that I might fuck this up and lose her.

  So I’ll give her a whole load of reasons to stay.

  I swing her up into my arms, kissing her all the way to the bed. There I lay her down amid the scattered rose petals, then lean in with my hands beside her shoulders and my body braced over hers. “You like me needing you, girl? You like knowing you’re the only woman in the whole fucking world I can imagine ever touching again?”

  “I do,” she breathes against my mouth.

  “Then you must be feeling real good now. Because you’ve got me tied up in knots from needing you so bad.”

  “There’s some payback, then.” Her lips curve under mine. “You tied me up, too.”

  Damn this girl, always making me laugh. “You liked that?”

  She gives a tiny nod before admitting, “Though maybe not the tied-to-the-bed part as much as I did the you-taking-what-you-wanted part.”

  That’s the part I liked, too. And it wasn’t a rope that held her still that first time. Won’t be what holds her still now. I reach for her left hand, bringing her wedding ring up to my lips, watching the flare of her eyes when I press a kiss to the gold band.

  “This ring is how I’m tying you up now, Maxine,” I tell her in a voice that’s pure gravel. “And I’ll be taking what I need from my wife. Only my wife. Yeah?”

  “Yes,” she whispers.

  “This ring means that anytime I want—and that’ll be real damn often—you’ll spread those pretty thighs for me. Yeah?”

  She’s trembling beneath me. “Yes.”

  “You ain’t gonna fight?”

  Maxine shakes her head, then pauses. “Unless you want me to?”

  “Not gonna lie. It’s sexy as fuck when you fight,” I say, nipping her soft bottom lip. “But better you save the struggling for after I’m inside you, when you’re pushing at me and crying that you can’t come even one more time. Christ, getting the last one out of you while you’re fighting against it is always the hottest damn ride.”

  She makes a small needy sound. “Try getting another out of me now.”

  “Not yet,” I say, though my dick’s already aching again. “Because you told me that you liked how I crossed lines to have you, but I don’t think you know how wide of a line I crossed when I married you.”

  For a moment she looks baffled. “You think I don’t know that planning to kill Papa is crossing a line?”

  Well, shit. That wasn’t what I meant. But probably best she knows this, too. “Crossing a line for you, maybe. Not for me. As far as I’m concerned, Papa’s garbage—and I’m always happy to take out the trash.”

  “Oh.” Her expression clears. “Tusk, too?”

  “Yeah.” Was real happy to take out that trash. “But that’s not what I’m talking about. I told you this marriage is to protect you if we ever end up in court. But that’s a load of bullshit.”

  Maxine goes real still. “How is it bullshit?”

  “Because even though what I said about husband and wife privilege is true, I sure as fuck don’t need a marriage license to protect you.” And my heart’s about to pound through my chest, because this might end up being a step too far over that line. “But I figured that as soon as you started thinking about all the shit I said to you and did to you, you’d take off. And I wanted to make it harder for you to get rid of me. So I told you that we ought to get married.”

  She stares up at me in disbelief. “But you lied about why?”

  “Yeah, angel. I did. Though I didn’t think you’d ever let me touch you again. I just knew that I had a big hole in me after I got out of the Cage…and that being with you filled it up, made me feel good again. But I also knew that if you left, it’d rip another hole in me. One I wouldn’t ever recover from. So I locked you down with that ring.”

  “That’s so wrong,” she breathes.

  “I know it.” My throat feels raw all of a sudden. “But you oughta know that this is how bad I need you. And there’s not a line I won’t cross to keep you.”

  “Even if I try to run away?”

  Ice splinters through my chest. Hoarsely I ask her, “Are you going to?”

  In answer, Maxine begins wriggling beneath me. Not trying to get away. Instead she begins working her long skirt upwards, hitching the silky fabric up to her waist…so she can spread her legs.

  Real fucking wide. Until she’s lying open and vulnerable under me, her emerald eyes shining when they meet mine.

  “Maybe one day I’ll run,” she says with a husky edge to her voice. “But only for fun, and only so you can catch me. Right now, I just want my husband to take what he needs. I just want to make him feel good.”

  That’s what I want to do for her. But it sounds like me taking what I need is what she needs, too. “You want me to use your pussy real hard, angel? Want me to fuck you good and deep?”

  She moans, her body moving restlessly. “Please.”

  “Nah, not yet.” Roughly I tug down the front of her pretty white dress, baring her soft breasts and getting a handful of the left. “Because I’m gonna make sure your tight little fuckhole is real wet before I try getting into it again. And there’s a whole lot of you that I like taking.”

  Starting with her mouth. Kissing her long and slow, with my fingers teasing her nipples until her breathless moans sharpen into needy whines. All at once, she seems to remember that touching me is allowed now, and her hands come up to cup the back of my head, her kiss deepening as she holds me tight. Then her fingers go roaming, and it turns out that I was right. All this fucking time, thinking Maxine’s touch would destroy me…I was right.

  Because no matter what she says, I’m not a good man. Not a man an angel like her could love. So I figure it’s just pure luck that the woman I fell so hard for likes how I’ll cross lines to have her—and even better luck that it makes her feel so damn good to let me take what I want, because otherwise she would never let me touch her. And if all I ever did was make her feel good for the rest of my life, I’d be a real fortunate bastard.

  Yet here she is now, touching me like it’s got nothing to do with sex. First she held me so tight, then her fingers went exploring—but although it feels damn good, it doesn’t seem like she’s trying to make this all hotter. She’s not digging her nails into me, or pushing or tugging and silently telling me what she wants, or even mindlessly stroking her fingers over my skin. Instead it’s as if Maxine simply wants to touch me. As if she’s wanted to touch me
, so now that she’s getting her chance, she’s taking it—and somehow it’s separate from all the sexy shit we’re doing at the same time.

  And I remember how she used to put her hand over my heart when she thought I was sleeping. How that would destroy me, too. Because it made me wonder if she felt more than just guilt or that she owed me, made me wonder if she wasn’t only taking care of me by letting me use her pussy. It made me wonder if my angel felt more than she was saying.

  Now I’m wondering again. Fucking praying that she does. But not really believing that she could.

  And I won’t ask her. Won’t ask for anything more than she’s already giving. Instead I let her wreck me over and over and over with her fingers gliding across my skin, because the alternative is that she’s not touching me…and I couldn’t bear that again.

  All I can do is give Maxine what she asked for. Making her feel good. Making her so damn hot that when I leave the sweetness of her lips and lick my way down to her breasts, she spreads her legs wider and begs for my cock inside her. But I ain’t done slicking her up. And she sure as hell doesn’t seem to mind it either, moaning and arching her back when I suck one of her stiff nipples into my mouth. I move to her other breast, and as soon as she’s panting and squirming, I keep on heading south, my breath skimming over white silk. Then she goes real still, her thighs trembling with the effort of staying so wide open as I draw in close, as if she’s waiting for me to take what I want.

  I want all of her. But no doubt, this tight pussy is one of my wife’s most delicious parts. So fucking hot and wet, every lick making her hotter and wetter, each taste better than the last. Especially when she starts writhing and I have to hold her down so I can stay right on her juicy little clit. And this time when Maxine touches me…fuck yeah, she’s pushing and pulling now, and chanting my name, but I don’t stop until she’s screaming it.

  There just ain’t no words for the taste of her as she’s coming on my tongue. ‘Delicious’ doesn’t even come close to describing pure fucking heaven.

 

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